Chapter 3 #2
After all these months of waiting for his call, Crew was on my line, and I didn’t know how to feel.
I had practiced so many different things that I would say to him if I ever saw him again, but right now, I was caught off guard and couldn’t really think of anything.
After all, I honestly tried to think of him as nonexistent so that it wouldn’t hurt so bad that he isn’t around, and that guilt from setting Emoney up wouldn’t eat me alive either.
Crew had asked me to call her outside the hotel that day, and he snatched her up like it was nothing and threw her in the trunk like a spare tire.
After he dropped me off at home, I don’t know what happened between the two.
I just put it all in the past and tried to move on with my life.
"Oh, Crew, wow. I can’t believe you decided to get on the phone with me. What do you want?"
I was trying to sound unbothered.
"Look, I'll be at your front door in about five minutes. Your brother just told me your building and apartment number."
I made a mental note at that very moment to kill Princeton if Crew didn't kill me first. Why would he tell this crazy ass nigga where I stay? Is he fuckin crazy?
"Why do you need to see me, Crew? What do we even have to talk about? Don’t you have my number? Couldn’t we have talked over the phone?”
"Pretty P, you know what we need to discuss. Don’t play dumb. You not good at it.”
“I’m not playing dumb. I genuinely don’t have a clue.” I played tough while rolling my eyes.
“I am sure that your ass can look down right now and see what our discussion is about. I don’t have your phone number because I got rid of the phone a long time ago.
Stop giving me push back and listen with your lil smart mouth ass.
I'll be there in five minutes." he said, his tone low and final before the line went dead.
"If this nigga kills me, I'm haunting Princeton's ass for decades. Every time he turns a corner, I'm going to be standing right there looking like a hologram." I balled up my fist.
I walked over and peeked out of the window, and after a few minutes of watching the courtyard, I spotted Crew walking up to my building.
Tall. Diamonds flashing on his wrist and neck, catching every light like he was a moving galaxy floating through the projects.
Every head that turned was stuck on him, watching the way he carried himself like he owned the block.
His ass was still fine, but all I could think about was whether my baby daddy was coming up here to check me or to take me out. Fuck I just wanted my Crunch Bars and my bed tonight. Not this kind of shit.
Crew disappeared inside the building and knocks soon started at the door. I reached up to my ponytail, tugging it in two parts to make it look tighter. Before I could even walk to the door, Princeton was already pushing the door open, Crew right behind him like a shadow.
His smell hit first, that rich nigga scent that was cologne and bath soap smelling like warm summer woods.
Crew tugged that half smile on the left side of his mouth when we met eyes, and it knocked more of my attitude away than his cologne already had.
This right here was why I knew my daughter would come out beautiful, look at her damn daddy. Jesus.
For a second, neither of us said a word, until Princeton’s voice snapped our focus.
“A’yo, I’m going home to Mama’s now. Crew has your candy and soda, chicken head. I’ll fuck with you later.” Princeton slapped hands with Crew.
“Safety nigga,” Crew said, nodding his head back.
Once Princeton was gone, it was just me and Crew and a whole lot of silence sitting between us. I had a mug on my face, because I wasn’t trying to give Crew any reason to believe shit is sweet over here.
“Crew, what are you doing here? I haven’t heard from you in months.”
He stared right at my stomach before he answered.
“You know why I’m here. The reason is protruding from your abdomen right now. Is that my baby, Pernelle? If it’s not, don’t lie to me. A lie like that brings the worst kind of nigga out of me, I swear.”
“Oh, trust me, I know it doesn’t take much for you to bring that man out, so I would never sign my own death certificate,” I shot back.
He laughed, a low, deep sound that rolled off his chest. Crew wasn’t embarrassed by his reputation of being a murderer, and he wore that title like it was designer.
Sometimes I wondered if this nigga was even capable of love.
Has someone like Crew ever been tender about a female? I highly doubt that shit has happened.
“Well, can we get a blood test just to be sure?”
“Crew, we don’t need a blood test. She’s yours. I didn’t sleep with anybody but you and Ebony these past two years. So, of course she is yours.”
“And how am I supposed to know that?” He still squinted his eyes with a curious expression.
“Because I wouldn’t lie. She’s your baby, Crew. Look, I know your ass is fine, paid, and whatever, but I’m not that desperate to get with anyone to lie about a baby. Shit, I didn’t even plan on telling you because I’m not begging for anyone to be in her life.”
He sucked in his bottom lip and rubbed his knuckle over his eyebrow.
“It’s a she, huh? You really having my lil girl?”
“I’m having my little girl,” I corrected. “Unless you really want to be in her life. Not in and out when you want to be, like my father was.”
“Of course I wouldn't. I mean; I may have not wanted a kid but if she is mine then I’m willing to take care of her. I’m not about to be a deadbeat ass nigga like my father either. If she is mine, I got her for life.” His response shocked me so much that I was stuck with no words for a few seconds.
“You, you, do?”
“Of course, but please don’t give a nigga any trouble or hold shit over my head because we have a kid together.
I don’t know how to coparent. Never seen healthy coparenting in my fuckin life, but me and you are going to have that.
I’m not going for none of that toxic ass arguing and fighting over her bullshit, you hear me, P? ”
His nose was flared, and he was speaking so passionately with a pointed finger that I couldn’t help but listen closely. It was like he was my daddy and not just my baby daddy.
“Okay, I agree, and to be honest, drama is why I didn’t want to tell you. I just want a peaceful life.”
“Life will never be peaceful until the afterlife, but we can make it appear that way for baby girl. We can start with her not growing up in ratchet ass Castle Hill. No disrespect to you and your family tree, but I want her in a nice neighborhood. One without a block party happening outside every night.”
Crew walked towards me and sat down on the couch. When he pulled me in closer by my hands, I thought this was about to turn sexual, but Crew started to place soft kisses on my hardened belly. The way he was kissing and rubbing over my stomach with his hands felt so right for some reason.
“This is where I live, Crew? This is all I can afford with my checks from the center.”
He squinted his eyes at me.
“Don’t disrespect me by talking about what you can afford. Don’t worry about affording anything. I take care of my entire family, so of course, I’m going to make sure my daughter is straight. She will live like the princess she is.”
He placed another kiss on my stomach.
“Okay, if you say so.” I was fighting hard to keep the smile from tugging at my lips.
Crew stood up from the couch, before kissing me on my forehead and walking towards the front door.
“Wait!” I stopped him.
“My brother said you had my candy and Dr. Pepper. Where is it?”
I stuck my hand out.
He chuckled, reaching inside his jacket pocket.
Crew pulled out at least four Crunch Bars and threw them on the couch.
You would think that nigga was throwing out hundreds the way my face lit up seeing the chocolate bars fall on top of each other.
My mouth watered, almost instantly ready to peel the blue wrapper back on one of them asap.
“Now stop sending that nigga on junk food errands every day. Let me know what you need, and I’ll stock up on it tomorrow and have it delivered here.”
“Okay,” I said softly, feeling so dainty after that forehead kiss.
“What do you plan on naming her? I know not no shit like Pernelle.”
“Really, Crew? Don’t diss my name.” I laughed, slapping at his head.
“Nothing is wrong with my name. I am named after my grandma.”
“I knew that before you told me, but don’t worry, I’ll come up with something fire. I like to be on my creative shit sometimes. But until then, don’t forget if you or lil whatchamacallit need anything, I’m there.”
“I won't, I hear you,” I replied, and Crew made his way towards the front door. When he stopped at the kitchen counter and picked up a photocopy of my baby shower invitation, I braced myself for his reaction. I’m mad as hell that I didn’t think to put that shit up.
“What’s this?”
“What is what?”
“This?” He turned my baby shower invitation around.
It was a SpongeBob theme on the invitation with a start time of 3:00 pm for next Saturday, but I know the invitation isn’t the reason he had that sour look on his face, but the fact that it read in honor of the parents, Ebony and Pernelle, on the top.
“Look, I can explain. I just didn’t want her family thinking I did anything to her or wasn’t keeping it real.”
“So what?” Crew rushed me as if my words weren’t coming out fast enough.
“So, I told them that Ebony and I did IVF, and that is how I am pregnant. They think it’s her eggs inside of me, so they think it’s her baby too.”
Crew shook his head and crumbled the invitation up in his hands.
“Cancel this shit and stop pretending if that isn’t true.”
“It’s not. Look, I thought I was doing the right thing by keeping us a secret. With your reputation and her disappearance, I just don’t need anyone thinking anything.”
Crew stepped back towards me while shaking his head.
“Thinking alone hasn’t ever proved anything in court. They can believe what they want, but they can’t prove you or me had anything to do with her death unless you tell them. Is your ass worried or feeling guilty enough to confess, Pretty P?”
He reached up and cupped my cheek with his hand. Crew stared into my eyes as he rubbed his thumb on my skin back and forth.
“I’m not going to tell anyone anything. You and I have a baby to take care of. I’m not giving that up for a bitch that's dead.”
When those words left my lips, you would think I’d said the sweetest shit in the world because Crew’s wide smile spread across his face. Now I see the stuff that really moves him.
“Alright good, well I’ll see you in the morning. Make sure you cancel that baby shower shit. Fuck Nomoney and her dumb ass family.”
He walked out of the apartment, and a smile spread across my face bigger than I’ve had in the past year.
I grabbed my candy bars from the couch and laid down with my cover, about to eat one of these and drift off to sleep. This entire time, I’ve felt that keeping this pregnancy from Crew was the right thing to do, but now, there was a feeling of peace inside of me that I wasn't feeling before tonight.
I don’t know what I’ll do about Emoney’s family, but I do know that if Crew and I can coparent the right way, my life won’t be hard at all. That's only if things go as he says they will.
I will however wait and see if Crew is really ready to step up.