Chapter 3
CHAPTER THREE
brADY
“ Y ou coming up to the house for dinner?” Remington passes me the tack from his horse, and I hang it up for him. “Erin’s making sloppy joes.”
“Sure.” I’m fucking starving . It’s been another long day of work on the ranch. If the damn weather would just let up, even a little bit, it wouldn’t be so bad. Instead, we’re getting more snow every day, and it’s colder than shit outside. “I just have to go home and shower, and then I’ll be there.”
“See you in a bit,” Rem says with a nod as he heads for his truck, and I climb into the 4Runner.
Thirty minutes later, after a quick shower and a change of clothes, I’m headed over to the farmhouse, the one that all of us grew up in, for dinner.
Several years ago, when our parents decided to build themselves a smaller, more manageable house for the two of them, Rem moved himself and his kids into the big house. We all supported that idea because Remington is now running the show at Wild River Ranch, and he had the kiddos, too. It felt like a tradition, a passing of a torch.
And it just made sense.
I park near the back door and enter through the kitchen, like I usually do. I can hear Holly telling a story in the dining room, and it makes me grin.
Holly and Johnny own me, and they know it.
“Uncle Brady,” Johnny exclaims when he sees me. “I’m glad you’re here. We’re outnumbered.”
“By who?”
I walk all the way into the room and come up short.
“By the girls,” he finishes, just as Daisy shoots me the biggest smile and comes running to me, wraps her arms around my waist, and gives me a hug.
“I haven’t seen you in forever .”
I pat her back and look across the room at Abbi, who’s watching me with serious blue eyes.
Yeah, I’m an asshole. I’ve done nothing but think of these two for the past couple of weeks, but I didn’t call or stop by. Because that’s pointless and does nothing but send mixed signals.
“We’re having sloppy joes,” Daisy informs me, pulling me out of my reverie.
“I heard,” I say with a grin and boop her little nose. “Did you save some for me?”
“We haven’t had any yet,” she replies and then hurries back over to her bestie.
“Now that you’re here,” Erin says as she crosses to the kitchen, “we can all dish up.”
“You didn’t have to wait for me.”
“It wasn’t a big deal,” Erin assures me as she walks by. Remington joins her to help, and I’m stuck here in the dining room with Abbi and three kids.
“How have you been?” I ask her, shoving my hands into my pockets.
“Doing well,” she replies with a nod. “And you?”
“Fine, just fine. Been busy out here, what with the sh—crappy weather.”
Her lips tip up in a grin. “Same, actually. When there’s snow, there’s mud, and I’ve been getting a lot of calls for cleanings lately, so my team has been busy.”
I nod and rock back on my heels. “Makes sense, I suppose.”
“Boy, grown-ups are boring,” Johnny mutters and rolls his eyes, making me smirk.
“It’s ready, everyone,” Erin announces, and we get to work making plates for the kids, and then ourselves, and settling at the long dining room table. As luck would have it, I end up right next to Abbi, and throughout the entire meal, I’m hyperaware of her scent, her warmth, how she moves, and the sound of her voice.
Fuck me, I’m so damn attracted to her, it’s as if I’m a magnet and she’s the north pole.
Finally, dinner’s done, and the dishes are cleared, so I can say my goodbyes.
“When will I see you again?” Daisy wants to know as I hug her goodbye.
“Oh, I’m sure I’ll see you during the holidays,” I assure her. “We always have parties and stuff, right?”
“Yeah, okay.” She kisses me on the cheek and then runs off to play with Holly. I guess the two girls are having a slumber party here tonight.
And that means that Abbi will be home alone. All freaking night.
Erin and Abbi are huddled together by the front door, and I decide that I’ll walk Abbi to her car. It’s already been a full evening of torture, so we might as well just carry on the vibe.
“I’ll walk you out,” I offer, and Abbi smiles and waves at the family.
“Be good, Dais. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Bye, Mom!” Daisy hardly spares her mother a glance.
“I’m glad that she loves being here so much,” Abbi says when we’re walking down the steps to the driveway. “At first, I was afraid that she’d want to come home in the middle of the night, but she’s totally comfortable here.”
“She knows she’s welcome,” I reply as I press my hand to the small of her back.
As we get closer to her car, Abbi almost slips, and as she rights herself, something falls out of her bag onto the snow below.
“Shit,” she mutters as I bend down and retrieve…a dildo ?
I hold it up, staring at it and then at her.
“Don’t tell me you’re borrowing this from Erin.”
“Oh, my God, no!” She reaches for it, but I hold it out of her grasp. “Give that to me, Brady.”
“I’m intrigued.” I eye it again. It’s big. And teal. “Why is it so colorful?”
“I don’t know. Don’t be a child and give that to me.”
I shake my head and press the button, but nothing happens. “It’s broken.”
“I haven’t put batteries in it yet.” Her face is flaming red, and now she won’t meet my eyes, and I feel like an asshole. “It ended up here by…accident.”
She tells me a quick tale about trying to hide it from Daisy, and it ended up in the kid’s pillow case, but luckily Erin found it, and Abbi came out to retrieve it.
“So, you haven’t used it.”
“Not that it’s any of your business, but no.” She frowns and reaches for it, and this time, I let her have it.
I fucking hate that she thinks she needs that thing. And the idea of playing with her, of using that on her myself to make her lose her pretty mind, and then fucking her the way she should be fucked makes my jeans too tight.
“Why are you scowling?” she asks as she stows the toy in her bag.
“Why do you need that thing?”
“For fuck’s sake,” she mutters, shaking her head. “Just drop it, okay? It doesn’t matter. It’s just a silly toy.”
But I think it matters. I think it matters a lot, actually, and I tip her face up so I can look her in the eyes.
“Tell me, Abs.”
“You’re impossible. Don’t you ever hear the word no ?”
“Sure. It’s fine, you don’t have to tell me.” I brush my thumb over her lower lip and then back away, and her tongue darts out to touch where I just was, and it’s almost my undoing.
“You kissed me,” she whispers and bites that lip, frowning as if she’s mad at herself. I want to smooth the frown lines between her eyebrows with my thumb, but I don’t. “And then you were just gone. So, yeah, I bought a toy. I’m a grown woman who can do…those things.”
She bought a sex toy because I got her hot and bothered and didn’t follow through.
I’m the lowest piece of shit there is.
“Abbi.”
“It’s cold,” she says and opens her door, climbing inside. “Have a good night, Brady.”
Without a backward glance at me, she pulls out of the driveway, headed toward town, and I stand in the goddamn snow, cursing myself as a fool.
Finally, I run around back to my own vehicle, start it, and drive into Bitterroot Valley, but instead of following Abbi to her house, I end up at The Wolf Den. The bar is trendy and serves good food, and on Friday nights, it’s usually packed.
Tonight is no exception, especially since we’re in the heart of winter tourist season.
Since I’m not in the mood for company, I find a single empty stool at the very end of the bar and order a beer.
I’m halfway into the pint when someone taps on my shoulder.
“I thought that was you,” Jen’s voice purrs from just behind me, and I turn on my stool to look at her. She’s a barrel racer, and she’s been a fuck buddy for years. Her golden eyes sweep over me from head to toe, and she licks her lips. “Let’s go back to my place.”
“Yeah.” I chug the last of my beer, toss some bills on the bar, and stand. “Let’s do that.”
Jen takes my hand and leads me through the crowd and outside into the crisp evening air.
“I’ll meet you there,” I tell her. “I don’t want to leave my car here.”
“I walked, so I’ll ride with you.”
“Hop in.” I hold the door open for her, then walk around to the driver’s side and start the engine. Jen’s place is less than two minutes away, in a little apartment above a garage. I’ve been here dozens of times over the years. Less in the last year or so, but I’m familiar with the place and with the woman.
Maybe I just need to fuck Abbi out of my system once and for all.
“I haven’t seen you in forever ,” Jen says as she wraps her arms and legs around me, kissing my neck as I climb the stairs to her place, carrying her with me. “God, I’ve missed this.”
I get her inside and then pin her against the door and kiss her, fisting my hand in her hair. But it’s not blonde. It’s dark.
And when my eyes meet hers, they’re not blue.
They’re gold.
Her body is too long and willowy. Not lush and curvy.
Every damn thing about this is wrong.
“Come on, Wild,” she says, grinding herself against me. “Fuck me.”
I carefully lower her to the ground and back away from her, breathing hard. She’s panting, too, and her eyes narrow on me.
“What the fuck, Brady?”
“This isn’t going to happen.” I wipe the back of my hand across my mouth, disgusted that I can still taste her there.
“Jesus Christ, you’re not a tease. Come on.” She whips her shirt over her head and reveals tits that aren’t covered by a bra. “You love fucking me. Let’s do this. Let me ride that cock.”
“Stop.” I shake my head and hold my hand up. “This isn’t going to happen ever again, Jen.”
She tilts her head to the side, her eyes narrowing. “You met someone.”
“I’m just over this. It’s nothing personal.”
“No.” She crosses her arms over her chest, not shy at all about her lack of clothing. “You met someone.”
“It doesn’t matter. Good luck to you, Jen. I’ll see you around.”
She moves out of my way, and I open the door and let the cold air wash over me as I descend the stairs.
Jesus, what was I thinking?
I wasn’t.
“When it doesn’t work out, you can come back,” Jen calls down after me, but I don’t reply.
I’m not fit for company. I should go home and sleep off this shitty mood. I absolutely should not go to Abbi’s house.
And yet, that’s where I find myself driving. And when I pull into her driveway and cut the engine, I can’t get up the nerve to go inside.
No, I’ll never see Jen again because she isn’t who I want. She’s who I should want. No strings, no expectations, no adorable daughter, nothing that I can fuck up or leave behind someday.
Instead, I seem to want the exact opposite of Jen, and she’s inside that townhouse right now, probably fucking a piece of plastic.
And that just pisses me off.
Suddenly, a text comes through my phone.
Abbi: Are you coming inside, or are you going to sit out there all night?
Pushing out of the car, I stride to the door and open it, then step in and see that Abbi’s sitting on the couch, her feet up and crossed on the cushions, with a throw blanket on her lap. Her hair is up, and the light from the tree dances on her face.
She’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.
“Why were you camped out in my driveway?”
“Because I didn’t know if I wanted to come inside.”
She tilts her head to the side. “Why?”
I have to pace, so I do. “You’re under my skin. I can’t fucking shake you. You’re always just there. At events with my family, hanging out with my sisters?—”
“If it makes you uncomfortable that I come to family events when invited, I’ll stay away from them, Brady. It’s your family.”
“It wouldn’t matter,” I explode, shaking my head. “Because you’re still here.”
I point to my head.
“I’ve stayed away for weeks, as you pointed out. I’ve buried myself in work, freezing my balls off out there in the goddamn snow. And you’re still there.”
I shake my head and pace some more.
“Hell, after you left tonight, I came into town and went to The Wolf Den. Thought I’d get a beer, and low and behold, there’s Jen.”
“Who’s Jen?”
“My fuck buddy.” I turn to look at her, and she flinches as if I’ve just hit her. “ Former fuck buddy. She invited me to her place, and I went.”
“How nice for you. I’m going to ask you to leave now.”
“No.” I shake my head, frustrated all over again.
“Yeah, you’re going to want to go. I don’t want to hear about how you fucked Jen tonight, Brady. We’re not friends like that.”
“I didn’t fuck her!” I throw my hands up in the air. “I couldn’t . I didn’t have any desire to. I don’t want Jen, and I made it perfectly clear that I will never be doing that with her again.”
Abbi’s eyes narrow as she watches me.
“So, you want me to console you after a breakup?”
“Jesus,” I mutter and pinch the bridge of my nose. “I’m messing this up.”
“I don’t even know what this is, Brady.”
“I want you .” The fight has gone out of me now, and I drop into the chair directly across from her. “I want you so fucking bad that everything aches, but I can’t have you, Abs.”
“Why not?” She tosses the throw aside and sits forward on the couch. “I haven’t said no.”
“I’m not a good bet.” I shake my head and push my hand through my hair, suddenly feeling really fucking nervous. “I can’t make a commitment to you, and you’re a mom. Daisy’s already way too attached to me, and I would never want to hurt her. I don’t want to hurt either of you.”
“Okay, then don’t.”
I can’t help but laugh at that, and Abbi scowls.
“I don’t think this is funny.”
“It’s ridiculous.” I sober again and watch her. “I can’t do promises because my job is dangerous, and…I just can’t. And you of all people deserve promises, Abbi, and I don’t even know you all that well.”
“Nobody has proposed anything,” she reminds me, irritation filling her voice. “So just slow down a minute. We’re attracted to each other, and we’re friends. We have the same circle of people. My daughter likes you. Why does it have to be anything more than that for right now?”
I shake my head again, but she continues.
“I’m not asking you for anything, Brady. Not a damn thing. Well, that’s not true. I would ask that you don’t break my daughter’s heart. That if we decide to sleep together, and if sex with you sucks, and we don’t want to do it anymore, you’ll still be kind to Daisy.”
“Why would the sex be bad?”
“Promise me.”
“I want to know why you assume that the sex will be bad , Abbi.”
Her lips twitch. “It was just an example. I don’t think it’ll be bad. But if you and I don’t work out, I don’t want Daisy to suffer for it.”
This is a bad idea. A bad, bad idea. I know better than to get involved, but fucking hell, I can’t walk out of here tonight without knowing what she tastes like.
“I will never make Daisy feel unwanted or suffer for any feelings that I might have for you.”
She watches me closely and then finally nods.
“I believe you.”
“I wouldn’t do that, Abbi.”
“I know. Now, what are you still doing way over there?”