Chapter 5
CHAPTER FIVE
Scarlet
By the time we reach the diner, the sun is high in the sky and the place is buzzing with the usual crowd. Rosie frantically waves to people while I absorb the smell of coffee.
“Booth or counter?” a waitress calls out.
“Booth,” Rosie answers, tugging me toward our usual spot by the window. I follow, my eyes scanning the room out of habit. Old instincts died hard, and even though Tyson Kensington’s funeral was two days ago, the town might still be littered with paparazzi.
“Mom, can I get chocolate chips on my pancakes?” Rosie pleads.
“Sure.”
The harried waitress appears with her notepad, pencil tucked behind her ear. “Morning, Scarlet. Usual for you?”
“Please. Rosie will have the kids’ pancakes topped with strawberries, chocolate chips, and extra whipped cream.”
“Coming right up,” she says before disappearing into the kitchen.
Rosie swings her legs under the table. It feels good to see her excited, even if it is over something as small as pancakes.
I know in the upcoming days the news we’re going to be leaving is going to take its emotional toll.
How do I prepare her? “Rosie, there’s something I want to talk to you about. ”
“What’s that?”
I’m about to start when the bell over the diner door jingles. When my heart trips inside my chest, I don’t need to see Jesse to know it’s him, but it sets alarms clanging. Is he going to spend time with us in public? The excitement of that possibility has my leg bouncing up and down.
Rosie, of course, ensures he notices us by waving at him frantically. “Jesse!”
Heavy boots signal his approach. I brace myself against the surge of warmth that floods through me when he stops at our table.
He looks every part of the successful horse farm owner from the breadth of his cowboy hat down to his boots.
His shirt sleeves are rolled to his elbows, casual and sexy.
Faint shadows under his eyes tell me he didn’t go back to the ranch and sleep after leaving my bed.
Immediate regret floods through me. I should be taking better care of him through this. Mentally I kick myself for not doing that instead of giving in to our baser needs throughout the night.
“Hey, Rosie,” he returns, his voice deeper than usual. When our eyes clash for somewhere between a second and eternity, the air between us sizzles.
“Want to join us?” I toss off casually.
“Mom, scoot over.” Rosie accepts the offer will be accepted, moving my mat closer to make room for Jesse’s presence on my side of the booth.
Jesse hesitates, just a second too long. It’s enough for me to notice—just like all the other times he’s done it when I’m not in uniform. Forcing my voice to stay even instead of blowing up at him, I jerk my chin at the seat. “You don’t have to.”
Jesse slides into the booth before gesturing to the waitress, who makes her way back over.
“Coffee, Jesse?” she asks, her tone curious about the town’s newly appointed king dining with a lowly member of its guard. More often than you’d think. Bile churns my stomach when I recall his forehead kiss before telling me not to get out of bed this morning and walk him to the door.
“Please.”
The waitress gives me a probing once-over, causing me to shift uncomfortably. After she leaves, I almost levitate out of the booth when Jesse’s hand finds mine beneath the table and his fingers squeeze it. “It’s been too long.”
“It was this morning,” I return coolly.
“Too long,” he counters. His fingers web through mine. “I missed you.”
“Y-you did?” I stammer, my emotions as fragile as a newborn colt trying their legs for the first time. Is this our turning point?
“Yes.”
“Do you think Lightning misses me?” Rosie wonders, oblivious to the tension bouncing between us.
Jesse’s countenance softens. “Since it’s Saturday, and you didn’t show up to ride him, I’m certain he does since he needs a good ride.”
“Can I come next week?” Rosie’s face is hopeful.
Jesse hesitates again, then concludes. “Maybe we can try for before that. That is, if your mom says it’s okay.”
“Please, Mommy?” Rosie asks, turning wide, pleading eyes on me.
Knowing I have to break the news to her about the upcoming shift in our lives, I’m unable to resist my daughter’s plea. “If you’re good.”
Rosie dances in her seat. “I’ll be good.”
I roll my eyes. “I have a witness, Rose Marie.”
Jesse chuckles softly, the sound drawing my attention back to him. A small smile tugs at his mouth over Rosie’s antics, but something else flickers in his eyes when he looks at me. Something I can’t quite decipher.
My brows draw together.
“What’s wrong?” he asks quietly.
“Nothing,” I deny, matching his tone.
“Liar.”
“Maybe.” The word falls out of its own accord.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing. Just…forget I said anything.” I lift my mug to my lips, hoping the warm liquid tampers down the emotions threatening to erupt.
Jesse’s fingers graze the webbing between mine even as his words fill the cracks splintering my heart. “Scarlet, nothing I’ve ever said to you has been a lie.”
And that’s the problem. I don’t know which you to believe.
Do I forget the original arrangement and remember the sweetness he’s bestowed on Rosie?
Do I treasure the heated glances he aimed in my direction while I sat in the bleachers around the horse ring at the Kensington Farm?
Our long discussions about his mother and my ex?
All in seclusion, of course.
I want to lean forward and lay my fears out, but our waitress returns with Jesse’s coffee before I can. My heart splatters beneath the booth because Jesse drops my hand at the odd look the waitress flicks in our direction before storming off without a word.
Only this time, it’s the beginning of our end when Rosie asks, frowning, “Why did she look at you like that?”
He breezes past her question. “Guess I don’t come in here much.”
This is it. This is the end. He had the opportunity to acknowledge you both and didn’t take it. Heartbreak is the least of what I feel. Still, I manage to keep my voice steady when I give Rosie the truth. “Small towns, kiddo. People…speculate about things that are none of their business.”
“So, we keep this between us, Scarlet. For now.”
The decision I made was just reaffirmed. The lines Jesse drew aren’t to protect us but are between us. I won’t cross them, nor will I let my daughter be placed at the crossroads.
Jesse’s head whips in my direction. His lips part to comment when our breakfast is delivered. Soon, Rosie is involved in eating and I push my food around my plate. Eventually, Jesse excuses himself for a family meeting. “I’ll touch base later.”
Right. Sure.
For now, I’ll pretend things haven’t changed and my heart isn’t breaking.
After all, I won’t be here to be subject to the small-town gossip when it finally shatters.