Chapter 30 Duke
DUKE
I watched from my spot on the man-made beach as Charlie and Harper held hands and plunged into the cold water below. They’d been at it all afternoon, wearing Grady, Lukas, and me out by seeing how far we could launch them into the lake.
I was, of course, the winner.
The girls had it easy, though. Olivia and Cleo were floating on the water in giant pink and red inner tubes, margaritas in one hand and books in the other. They’d occasionally come ashore to grab a snack or refresh their drink, but somehow we more often ended up swimming out to them with refills.
Grady walked back to Lukas and me with a towel slung over his shoulder and water droplets clinging to his hair. I fished out a fresh beer from the cooler beside me, holding it out as he plopped down in his chair.
“I didn’t realize I planned this trip for us to end up at their beck and call,” Lukas grumbled. “So far, I’ve done more running around for other people’s drinks than I have for myself.”
“You’ll understand it one day,” Grady said, nodding in thanks for the beverage. He stared at his wife on the water, smiling like a goddamn fool.
Lukas huffed. “I will not.”
“It’s called Marriage 101. Happy wife, happy life. And I, for one, want the best of both worlds.”
“You’re so pathetically obsessed,” Lukas said, blowing out a breath. “It’s disgusting. See, this is why I’m never getting married.” He paused, reaching over to try to tap his bottle with mine. “At least Duke agrees with me.”
I shook my head, jerking away my drink before he could make contact. “Sure don’t. I’d spend the rest of my life bringing your sister those fruity little cocktails she loves so much if she’d let me.”
If she’d stay.
While this weekend had been great in so many ways, it was like a false sense of security.
We all saw the massive elephant standing in each room we entered, but no one spoke about the meeting with the lawyer on Monday.
No one uttered a word about the possibility of Olivia leaving. It was like it didn’t exist.
Only it did, and it was damn near all I could think about.
“Scratch that, Grady,” Lukas mumbled. “This one’s pathetic too.”
“I’m not pathetic.”
He tilted his head to the side. “Your actions say otherwise.”
“Weren’t you the one wondering what my intentions were with your sister?” I snapped. “Well, now you fucking know.”
My mood had grown worse as the day dragged on. I wasn’t going to let the girls see the shift, but I was done pretending around Lukas and Grady. They were just going to have to deal with my sorry ass sulking around as the weekend came to a close.
“What crawled up your ass and died?” Lukas asked.
I knew what my best friend was doing. He wasn’t stupid. He was, however, an asshole who would force me to confront my feelings rather than let me dig myself into a hole I’d struggle to climb out of.
I stared straight ahead, watching the sun dip lower in the sky. It nearly kissed the tops of the pines. “I love her.”
The words were little more than a whisper, but they felt like a scream.
It was exhilarating and terrifying at the same time.
When Sarah and I divorced, I swore I’d never let myself end up in this position again.
Not just because of Harper’s feelings, but my own.
The depression I fell into after realizing my marriage had fallen apart had nearly destroyed me.
It’d taken a long time, but with help, I managed.
Being with Olivia had changed me. It made me want and wish and dream for a life better than the one I was going through the motions in. I laughed more now than I ever had with my ex-wife. Loved harder, too.
Harper’s happiness seemed to improve tenfold. She spoke confidently about things she wanted, and didn’t spend her days hiding away in her room when it was just the two of us. We ate most meals together, and she even came over to the bar sometimes to help us get ready for opening.
For the first time in years, the family I always wanted was right within reach.
“Well, no shit, Sherlock,” Lukas grumbled.
“Glad you finally pulled your head out of your ass,” Grady added. “Do I need to give you the stern ex-husband talk?”
“Why are we talking about my ass so goddamn much?” I asked.
“I already pulled my big brother card,” Lukas added. “You’re safe.”
I glanced between the two, who had shit-eating grins on their faces. “Alright, then why’re you asking me stupid questions then?”
“I didn’t ask you if you loved her, I asked what has you in such a pissy mood. I’m not an expert, but I don’t think love is supposed to look like that.” Lukas gestured toward me. “You look like the old Duke. The one who never smiled and only spoke in grunts.”
I ran my hand through my hair, ignoring his jab. “I can’t just tell her—”
“Why not?” Grady interrupted. “Worked for me.”
“Yeah, well, it’s not the same, is it? You and Cleo were a thing before you decided to beg your way to a second chance.”
“Third,” Grady corrected.
“Whatever.” I waved him off. “The point is, I don’t have that with Olivia. I may have known her my whole life, but not romantically. It’s fucking crazy to ask someone to stay for something that’s not even two months old.”
“No, it’s crazy not to if that’s how you feel.” Lukas leaned forward, bracing his elbows on his knees. “I may not be an expert on love or the fine rules of marriage, but I know if you find something worth holding on to, then you should fucking try.”
“Are you just saying all that because it’s your sister?”
“I love my sister. I want the best for her, but I want the best for you, too. You’re the closest thing I have to a brother—”
“I take offense at that,” Grady mumbled.
Lukas paid him no mind. “You deserve everything you’ve convinced yourself you don’t deserve.”
Some part of me wanted to agree with him. I’d done so much work in therapy to get to where I was today. I was a proud father. I was a good man with good intentions. I was a business owner who, albeit in a weird way, brought something meaningful to the community.
And I loved a woman with every desperate part of my soul.
But is it enough? Am I enough?
“She deserves more than the life I can give her,” I said.
My eyes slid to where she sat in the water, head thrown back in laughter as Charlie and Harper snuck up behind Cleo to push her overboard.
They screamed and howled with laughter right before Cleo tugged Olivia in after her.
Her arms flailed as she tried to catch herself, but she was slipping beneath the surface, drink and all, in a matter of seconds.
When she came back up, all four of the girls began pushing water toward one another. They all sounded so happy.
“More than what? No, I’m serious. What more do you think she needs?” Grady asked. “You know her, Duke. You know that she pretends to be all diamonds and class when in reality she hates the front she is forced to put on.
Liv’s my best friend. When we got divorced, I was worried about her.
That woman works too damn much and looks for any excuse not to sit still in one place for long, and hardly takes care of herself.
But now?” He shook his head. “I’ve never seen that woman as happy as I have with you—despite the shit circumstances that led her here. ”
“I can’t give her the life she’s used to. I own a small town bar, not a multi-billion-dollar company. What can I offer her that she can’t get on her own?”
“Jesus, man. You think that’s what she wants?” Lukas questioned. “She doesn’t give a shit about any of that. She plays the part because there are sharks in the water watching and waiting for her to make any mistake so they can swoop in and destroy her.”
Grady pointed his bottle toward Lukas. “Exactly. And you said it yourself. Olivia Hart can get anything she wants, but what she wants is you. If she was looking for a man to hang off her arm, don’t you think she would’ve found that already?”
“I guess I hadn’t thought of that.”
“Y’all are both such idiots,” Lukas muttered.
“You said it best yourself. There’s nothing you can specifically offer, financially, that she couldn’t handle on her own.
If she wants a trip to Paris, then guess what?
She’ll fire up the jet and be on her way.
But you showed her something she can’t give herself. ”
“What’s that?” I huffed.
Grady’s face softened. “A partner she can rely on. Someone who sees her for who she is, not the face behind the company. You may not see it, but we do. She doesn’t shy away from you.”
A commotion drew our attention to the girls. Charlie and Harper were racing toward the shore as Cleo and Olivia took their time bringing back their tubes. It was getting dark, and I was sure we were about to be asked by two very inquisitive children if the bonfire was ready.
Harper came up first, colliding into me so hard that my chair nearly toppled over. Charlie followed suit with Grady.
“Daddy, is it time for s’mores yet?” Charlie asked, looking up at Grady through thick lashes.
I may have been wrapped around Harper’s finger, but Charlie had her father completely under her spell. I was sure that if she asked him to do a dance on live television in a hot pink ballgown, he would’ve called his fancy agent to make it happen.
“Your dads were too busy yapping to light the fire, but your uncle Luke will take care of everything,” Lukas said, pushing to his feet. They cheered and danced as we grabbed their towels and quickly wrapped them up.
“I take it you agreed to s’mores?” Cleo said, walking up and planting a kiss on Grady’s cheek.
“Sure did. Thankfully, Uncle Luke is going to get everything started,” he said, returning the gesture as Charlie fake vomited.
“Y’all are gross.”
Olivia stopped beside me, collapsing into Lukas’s vacated seat. She had this adorably dazed smile on her face. The kind you get from being tipsy on the water all day. Her olive skin was glowing, sun-kissed and radiant.
“Did you have fun?” I asked, pulling Harper into my lap.
Olivia bit her lip and nodded. “I think I needed this more than I realized.”
“Good. I’m glad we could give it to you.”
Without thinking, I reached out and squeezed her thigh.
It wasn’t like everyone around us hadn’t seen the longing glances we’d given one another, but this was the first time we did so in a way that felt free.
It couldn’t be excused as my offering comfort in a moment of grief, nor was it the casual touch of a part-time lover.
It took me only a moment to realize Lukas was lingering out of direct sight, watching the four of us with our kids. He was too far away for me to get a read on him, but I swore I saw something like longing there, which was strange.
Lukas had always been adamant about never getting married.
He wanted to live his life freely and was content being the fun uncle, but I wondered if that was really true.
I wondered if losing John and seeing Olivia’s struggle to balance her career and her heart weren’t weighing on him in more ways than one.
“Did Luke go to the house?” Olivia asked, turning to find her brother. She spotted him as he slipped inside the cabin and frowned. “Is something wrong?”
“I think he’s having trust issues with anyone else handling the food. He hasn’t forgiven us for the reaper slice last night.” She grimaced. “But he’ll be back. Oh, and we still need to remake our picture from when we were kids.”
Olivia laughed. “We were eighteen and twenty-three.”
“Like I said,” I deadpanned. “Kids.”
She looked toward the lake and pushed to her feet. “Oh, well. Guess we’d better head inside then—”
“Oh, no, you don’t,” I said, snatching her around the waist. I tossed her over my shoulder, playfully smacking her ass as I turned away from the kids. Cleo and Grady cheered as I jogged with her to the dock.
Lukas appeared on the porch a second later, a bag of marshmallows in one hand and a box of graham crackers in the other. “Wait for me!”
“There’s no way I’m going to let you toss me in the water, Duke Bennett!” she cried, kicking her legs wildly. “I refuse!”
“Come on, honey. I know you’re already wet for me.” She guffawed at my joke, pounding my back with her fists.
Lukas was out of breath as he skidded to a stop in front of us. He called for Grady to grab his camera. “It’s tradition!”
“I don’t think doing something one time is considered a tradition,” Olivia interjected. I kept her in place over my shoulder, knowing with certainty that she’d run off if I let her.
Lukas peeked at his sister. “Well, this makes it two times, so…”
“Kind of feels like we’re making a tradition,” I agreed.
“You guys are the worst.”
As Grady came running up with the girls in tow, I helped set Olivia down on the dock. The moment her bare feet hit the sun-warmed wood, Lukas and I grabbed an arm and a leg, swinging her back and forth over the water.
“I’m so going to kill you for this,” Olivia squealed as we tossed her into the water.
As she surfaced, I pushed Lukas in next, and then followed suit. Before long, all six of us were wading around, sending waves of water speeding toward each other.
Olivia tried to sneak toward the shore, but I grabbed around her middle and yanked her back to my body. “Where do you think you’re going?” I whispered in her ear.
“Away from you,” she said, kicking her legs in the water. “You don’t fight fair.”
“When it comes to you?” I pressed a kiss softly along her neck. “Never.”