Chapter 26
twenty-six
MAYA
The oysters were good. Liam was better.
We spent the night tangled in his bed until there was no doubt he had lived up to any expectations from our first time together.
I wake feeling like I’m stuck in some kind of fever dream, my skin still flushed, slick with sweat. Liam is behind me, kissing my neck, and it’s real this time, not some memory or delusion.
“So beautiful,” he whispers against my shoulder. He rolls us until I’m on my stomach and drags his mouth down the back of my neck, moves lower and lower until his teeth graze my hip. “I’m sorry about dinner.”
“No, you’re not.”
“No, I’m not.” He rolls me again and settles on top of me, resting his weight on his forearms. “But I’ll make it up to you.”
His mouth finds mine, warm and inviting. And just like that, I want him again, need him even. It doesn’t matter if my heart is still figuring out what it can handle, my body has spoken clearly. It’s not just the scent I’m addicted to. It’s Liam. Every little thing about him.
He slides down my body, kissing each inch of exposed skin. When he reaches the crease of my thigh, he spreads my legs wider, settling himself in between them, a perfect fit.
His fingertip traces each letter of the tattoo on my hip. Then his lips do the same. A soft press on each and every swirl. “What’s it mean?” he asks. “I never asked you before.”
“It’s French,” I gasp when his mouth moves to my center. “To wander. But like you mean it.”
“Don’t go wandering off on me now.”
I reach down, pull him back up until our lips are aligned again. “I’m good right here.”
He lets out a quick laugh, kisses me again. His erection presses against my thigh and I wiggle my hips until our bodies are lined up exactly how I want them.
“How’d I get so lucky, Maya?” he asks, just as he presses into me. His movements are slow but deliberate. He wants me to feel everything . “Sometimes I wonder if I have power to, if I wished to find you again and I just can’t remember, if there’s some kind of magic at play here.”
“Liam, I,” I gasp, adjusting to the feel of him. But I don’t know what to say. Because I still have no idea where this is going. So I kiss him instead.
“It’s okay.” He grips a hand around my thigh, pulling it up until my leg is wrapped around him. He slides me forward, deepening the angle and I moan with the movement.
His words are still lingering in the air between us, but I’m too lost in the feel of our bodies moving together to speak. All I can focus on is the way his hands skate across my skin, the way his eyelids flutter like he’s using every ounce of strength to keep them open and on me, the way his breath puffs out against my lips.
He hits a spot inside me that has my back bowing. Thank god we have the house to ourselves because I’m more than struggling to stay quiet. He moves his lips down to my chest, slides a hand between my legs and circles my delicate skin until I’m writhing beneath him. Until sparks ignite behind my eyes and my whole body goes fizzy with satisfaction.
I feel him follow my lead, his muscles going tense and rigid and then softening as he collapses onto the bed beside me.
“Okay,” he gasps after a few long moments. “I really do need to feed you now. How do you feel about breakfast in bed?”
I turn onto my side and he immediately pulls me into his chest. His fingers slide through my hair, making me shiver.
“You really don’t have to go through the trouble. Or we could always start those cooking lessons and make something together,” I offer.
“Maybe I just don’t like the idea of you leaving my bed.”
I prop myself up on an elbow so I can see his face. “So what’s your plan then? Hold me hostage and hope I don’t notice as long as I’m not hungry?”
“Is that a bad plan?” He smirks and I roll my eyes before sitting up. “No, don’t go.” His face softens and he reaches out to pull me back into his arms. “I won’t hold you against your will. But I was serious about not wanting you to leave. Last time you were gone for weeks.”
Oh. “You missed me?”
He scoffs, like he’s insulted by the question. “Look, I know we’re gonna get up soon. I know you’ll want to spend the day with Ellie as soon as she’s back. I know my daughter will probably want to spend all night with you sharing every detail of her sleepover.” I laugh, hoping he’s right because I want to hear all the details. “I know we haven’t really discussed what this is, and I promised you we could go as slow as you want. But can you do me one favor?”
“Can I have like an hour to rest, first? I’m still a little sore.”
“ Maya .” He rolls us over, pinning me to the bed as I try and fail not to giggle. “I’m being serious.”
“Okay,” I whisper, looking into his eyes. “What’s the favor? I will very seriously consider it.”
He blows out a breath, clearly over my attempts at banter. “Sleep here.”
“Like, here, here?”
“Yes, here. In this bed. From now on. No more guest room. Can you give me that?”
His eyes rove over my face, searching for an answer. I wiggle my lips, purse them a few times, squint in indecision.
Then my smile breaks free.
“Yes, chef.”
I definitely gave in to breakfast in bed. I am Princess Maya after all.
Liam invited me to come to the diner where he was meeting Poppy and the Calloways, but after spotting Theo’s truck back in the driveway next door, I had to go see my girl.
“Hey, My,” Theo greets me when he opens the door. I immediately take Stevie out of his arms and pepper her with kisses. “Thanks. She’s been clingy this morning and my arm was starting to fall asleep.”
“I will take this little nugget off your hands any time.” I blow raspberries against Stevie’s cheeks until she’s bubbling with laughter. “How’s Ellie?”
“I think she’s happy to be home. It’s still not easy with her mom.”
Theo’s frown makes my heart ache. I’ve always known Ellie had a tough relationship with her parents, specifically her mom. It’s one of the reasons she came all the way to California for school and met me. But I also know that the Kleins were like pseudo-parents to Theo long before he married Ellie. Those relationships must be so difficult for him to navigate.
“Well, hopefully they gave you some help with this one,” I say, bouncing Stevie.
“Yes, that was definitely a plus. El’s upstairs if you wanna head up. Pain seems to be okay today, but her back was getting sore after the car ride so she’s just lying down.”
“Great. Actually, do you wanna come up with me, just for a minute? I have her birthday slash Christmas present, and it’s for you too.”
We climb the stairs and Stevie wiggles out of my arms as soon as she sees her mom. She runs over to the bed and reaches for Ellie, babbling “Uppy,” again and again.
I scoop her up and set her down on the bed where she crawls into Ellie’s lap.
“Hey, belated birthday girl.”
“You’re here!” Ellie chirps. “It finally feels like Christmas now.”
“I’m gonna pretend that I didn’t hear that,” Theo mutters, before sitting on the bed. “I’ll leave you two alone but Maya said she had a present for us.”
“Oh, you didn’t have to—” Ellie starts.
“And since when has that ever stopped me?” I say, handing her the gift bag.
Ellie pulls the datebook out of the bag and shoots a quick look to Theo. “A calendar. Thanks, My.”
I can tell they’re both confused. I don’t do lame gifts. “Yeah, it’s for next year, so you can easily see all the things you have to look forward to.” Theo makes a throaty sound and I think he understands, at least partially. I take the book out of her hands and flip pages until I reach February. “Galentine’s Day!” I cheer. “And neither of us have to travel this year. I have all sorts of ideas but I know we have to go all out, teach Stevie and Poppy what this holiday is about. They are the future generation you know.”
Ellie and I reminisce on a few of our favorite past Galentine’s while I flip to the month of June. “And here,” I say pointing. “Stevie’s second birthday. That’s gonna be pretty special, right? I have a sneaking suspicion we’ll be throwing the party of the century. And I will be there no matter what this time.”
Tears start to well in her eyes. She’s spent the last three months feeling horrible, being scared of what’s to come with this pregnancy. When I was trying to come up with a gift idea, all I really wanted was to remind her that good things are in her future too. She just has to get through this tough part first.
Theo grabs the calendar out of her hands and flips to July. He pulls out a pen from the nightstand and writes Inaugural Village 4th of July Party . “I think we’re ready to do summer events here. Let’s celebrate all the holidays. In fact…”
Ellie sniffles into Stevie’s hair while we watch Theo flip through the pages again. When he gets to September he pauses and looks up at me. “What’s this?”
He’s pointing to the three weeks I blocked out and wrote Norway , with lots of little Norwegian flags scattered across the page. Poppy helped me fill it out yesterday with her new glitter pens.
“That’s your real present. You both deserve a vacation and I want to give it to you. I know you’ve never been to Norway and I am positive you’ll both love it, and our property there is one of my absolute favorites. I booked a private hytte which is like a summer cabin, so there’s room if you want to bring the kids. And if you’d rather have time for yourself, I will come back here and watch them for you.”
“Maya—” Ellie’s voice breaks as she loses all control of her tears so I do my best to distract her with descriptions of the resort and everything I’ll put on their itinerary. Theo stays silent, but after a minute he gets up and offers me a hug.
“This is exactly what she needed,” he whispers in my ear. “Thank you.” He grabs Stevie off the bed and heads toward the door to leave us. “You know,” he says, turning back to look at me. “We had a present for you too. But Ellie asked me not to give it to you. Maybe you should talk about it before it’s off the table.”
With those ominous words, he disappears down the stairs.
And Ellie’s looking anywhere but me.
“What is he talking about?” I ask.
“Nothing, it’s silly. I just couldn’t decide on the right gift for you so…it’s coming…later.”
“Ellie,” I deadpan, sitting next to her on the bed. “You know I don’t care about gifts. But what is he talking about? He clearly had something to say there.”
“Ugh, okay, fine. He wanted to give you a cabin.”
It takes me a minute to understand what she’s saying. “A cabin? Here? Like a house? Your husband wanted to give me a house as a Christmas present?”
“Yeah? I mean, he knows how much I love having you close and he really loves you too, I hope you realize that. So he thought if he gave you one, you’d know we really wanted you here. And one of them will be available at the end of February when the last renter leaves, so if you want it…”
She trails off and I’m still so confused by what Theo said. Because?—
“You told him not to. You don’t want me to stay here?”
“No, of course I do. I absolutely want you here. I just thought that things with Liam might be…sometimes the way you talk about him and Poppy, I…I didn’t want to give you an excuse to leave something that’s really good.” She nibbles on the inside of her cheek. “I’m sorry if I’m meddling, but you seem so happy recently. And I know you haven’t told me anything after the kiss, but I feel like there just has to be something going on, and?—”
“Jeez, El. I have never heard you ramble like this in my life.”
She shoves my shoulder. “You must be rubbing off on me then.”
“Well,” I start. “You are one intuitive pregnant lady, that’s for sure.”
“I am?” She pivots onto her knees and grabs my hands between us, her eyes sparkling like a Christmas tree. “I’m right? Of course I’m right. I knew it!”
“Okay, okay. Don’t get cocky.”
“Fine,” she says, sitting back on her heels. “Tell me everything.”
Two hours later I have successfully provided Ellie with every detail that I was willing to share.
Her expressions have shown me everything from unadulterated excitement to a quick slip of jealousy—only about the amount of brownies he’s been making me—to tears of joy.
But now that I’ve completed catching her up, she just looks disappointed.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
She presses her lips together, her tell-tale sign of trying to prepare the right words. I’ve seen her make this face in almost every interview we gave together while we were hiring for our company.
“What is it? Just tell me, El. Is he secretly an axe murderer or something?”
“It’s just—” She pauses, makes the damn face again.
“What?” I exclaim, getting impatient.
“You’re still planning on leaving. You asked him to take it slow, which is something I never thought I’d hear come out your mouth.” I scoff, but she gives me a look that says she knows me way too well for me to pretend otherwise. “You said earlier you would come back to watch Stevie. Does that mean you don’t see a future with him? Is it just a fling?”
I switch positions on the bed, my neck starting to go stiff from laying on my stomach. “I don’t know, really. He seems perfect. But they all seem perfect. And I always move too fast, make too many plans. I’m trying not to follow my old patterns. I’m done molding my life around men who just end up letting me down. I missed your daughter’s first birthday because Ryan just needed me in Europe to impress some investors. Never again .”
Ellie laughs, a real one from deep in her belly. “How is Liam even remotely similar to the guys you usually go for? I really don’t see it.”
She’s right. He’s nothing like Ryan or Greg or anyone I dated in college. I’ve always gone for the good on paper guys. Fancy apartment, impressive job, a family well-known enough that my dad approves just from their last name. Good on paper is overrated.
“Obviously, Liam’s different. I’m just trying to be realistic. If I start making plans then I’m setting myself up for disappointment. I don’t want to get swept up and I’m?—”
“You’re definitely getting swept up. I can see it in your eyes, My. You like him.”
“Okay, maybe I am. But I’m trying to protect myself here. All the hope I have feels…treacherous. I don’t trust my own judgment anymore. And Liam’s barely dated anyone in years. Sure, he thinks he wants me, but I’m also the only single female living at his house. What if it’s just proximity?”
Ellie pins me with a stare. “You honestly think that?”
“I don’t know.” And maybe that’s a lie, because even the bits and pieces I can remember from our night in New York feel momentous. I think back to everything he said to me in bed this morning. It all felt bigger than just convenience. “I just want to keep it casual until I feel really sure. It’s so complicated. I mean, god, he’s your neighbor , he has a daughter. If things don’t work out I can’t just move on and try to forget about him.”
Or make myself forget about him, I don’t say. I still can’t stop thinking about that. That I’ve been seriously wronged by two long-term relationships, but my one night with Liam was what sent me spiraling enough to force his existence from my memory.
“But what if it does work out? Wouldn’t it be all that more amazing?”
It’s surprising how optimistic she is after everything she went through with Theo. I guess when it comes down to it, she loves love, just like me. We’ll never truly give up, even if and when we desperately want to.
“Well, I did agree to share his bed today,” I offer.
Ellie squints at me. “What does that mean?”
“He asked if I would stay in his room from now on, instead of the guest room.”
Now she pouts. “That’s adorable. I think I’m gonna cry again.”
“Your pregnancy hormones are killing me,” I tease. But I do not need a reminder of how romantic he is. Because it was adorable. And sweet, and perfect, and I need to keep my head on straight. “Wanna go pick up something to eat?” I ask, hoping for a subject change.
“No way. It’s time for you to get home. A hot chef wants you in his bed.”
“Princess Maya!” Poppy cheers as soon as I walk in the door.
“Hey Pop-tart. I missed you.” I scoop her up and spin us in circles until I feel dizzy and set her down. “How was the big sleepover?” I turn to find Liam in the kitchen, mixing something on the stove. When our eyes meet he shakes his head in defeat.
“It was so much fun! Sierra and Huxley B. came over too, and we built snowmans and went sledding down the hill and baked cookies and Beau and I got married!”
Okay, that’s a lot to unpack. “There’s more than one Huxley in your class?”
Liam glares at me. “That’s the part of her story you have an issue with?”
I can see now there are at least three different things working on the stove. Liam is definitely stress-cooking. My stomach rumbles at the decadent aroma and I feel a little guilty knowing I’ll be reaping the rewards.
“Come here, sweetie. I want to hear everything.” I grab Poppy’s hand and lead her over to the couch to sit down. “What do you mean you got married? I’m pretty sure that’s not legal in Vermont.”
“It’s definitely not!” Liam yells from the kitchen.
“But we kissed. Doesn’t that mean we’re married?” The sound of a high-speed blender fills the home and I try not to laugh at Liam’s dramatics. Poppy doesn’t even notice and just keeps talking, even when he turns it off so he can eavesdrop some more. “Sierra said we had to kiss and they all counted to five to make sure it counted. And then she said we were hubbard and wife.”
I snort. Hubbard ? This adorable little angel. I get why Liam calls her that. Her wide eyes gaze up at me like she cannot understand any humor in this. Maybe I should try a different tactic.
“Why did you decide to marry Beau? Don’t you think you want to date around? See if there’s anyone you might like better?” I brush some of her errant hair behind her ears, tip her chin up toward me. “You still have a few good years left.”
Liam clears his throat to cover a laugh. At least I can help him see the humor in this.
Poppy hums, tilting her head to the side. She’s giving it some serious thought. “No. I like Beau. He always shares his lunch with me. And he thinks my pod is cool.”
Huh. If only relationships were that simple. Hell, maybe they are. I remember Ellie telling me that when she was growing up, Theo was the only person she could really talk to about her lupus. You never know when you’re going to meet the one.
Food and understanding. I guess in the grand scheme of things, that could be husband material.
Yeah, I want that. Shit. Do I have that? No, no, no, no. I will not think of Liam as husband material. Do not get swept up.
“Maya?” Poppy waves her tiny arm in front of me to steal my attention. “Did Daddy break the curse?”
Huh?
“Dinner’s ready!” Liam yells, before I can figure out her line of questioning. She seems to forget about it too, with the possibility of food and gallops into the kitchen.
When I see the table, I’m awestruck. And then he announces the meal.
Tonight, Liam’s made an endive and apple salad with the most beautiful rose-colored radicchio, saffron risotto with seared scallops and tarragon gremolata, and on the side, roasted olives with tons of herbs I remember from the greenhouse, all nestled underneath a gorgeous ball of burrata that I cannot wait to dive into.
This meal is fancy , even for him.
This meal is full of all my favorite things. And I know he knows this from the five days we stayed up late watching cooking shows in his bed. When I perked up each time someone made scallops or risotto. When I awkwardly moaned every time the camera zoomed in on someone cutting open a ball of burrata. In my defense, is there anything sexier?
This is the meal he never got to make last night. The one we skipped in lieu of lots of sex and chocolate mousse in bed. Okay, heart, you can melt a little.
“This looks incredible,” I declare, hoping I’m displaying everything I can’t say aloud with my eyes.
“Daddy, this looks weird. Can I have noodle rice?”
Liam’s head falls into his hands as he blows out a long breath. I’m sure this was a ton of work, even by his standards. Poppy’s an adventurous eater for a seven-year-old, but she’s still a kid.
“Poppy,” I offer, “I bet you’ll love this. Here.” I take her plate and use the tongs to pull out a few pieces of apple from the salad bowl. “You love apples. And this rice smells so good.” I scoop some of the risotto onto her plate next, avoiding any scallops. I hated them at her age too. Now, I’m happy to have more for myself. Lastly, I give her a piece of crostini and spread some of the burrata on it. “No one has ever complained about bread and cheese.”
“Okay, this doesn’t look so bad,” she says, eyeing her plate. In seconds her mouth is full and she’s muttering her usual “Mmm, mmm, mmm’s” while her dad and I laugh.
Liam’s hand skates across the table until his fingertips touch my own. “I hope you like it.”
Like is very much an understatement. I devour this meal. With zero shame, I have second helpings of everything. In a moment of weakness, I even steal the last scallop off of Liam’s plate.
“I’m sorry,” I mumble, after it’s safely down my throat. “It’s just…really yummy.”
He smirks, a satisfied smugness radiating off of him. “I’m glad you enjoyed it. I know you don’t have a lot of fancy restaurants you can go to here, so I wanted to remind you that you have me instead.”
And there goes my heart again, softening to the point that it may dissolve into nothing. This was more than just a meal he knew I’d enjoy.
This was bait. This was Liam proving a point, one I’m still not ready to believe in.
Poppy and I take Penguin for a walk while Liam cleans up from dinner. She and the dog both bounce in and out of snow piles while I try to catch them on video with my phone. Both Liam’s and Ellie’s houses still have the Christmas lights up, and it makes the snow glimmer like starlight. The videos are blurry but magical. I can’t wait to edit them and show Liam.
When I scroll through my camera roll, every frame is Poppy, Liam’s food, selfies of us all together, and a few out-of-focus motion shots of my attempts at catching Mr. Milkshake in action.
My blog has been on hold since I got here in October, but I realize it’s been over a month since I’ve posted anything to my social media. While I don’t live a typical influencer lifestyle, not wanting to share any personal info, I’ve always enjoyed featuring local businesses, travel destinations, anything to encourage people to explore, to wander more.
My first thought is that I haven’t been traveling, but then I realize I didn’t even post anything from my latest trip to London. Instead of using my free time to scope out hidden gems for travelers, I searched for the best gifts for Liam and Poppy, counted down the minutes until I knew they were settled in at home so I could FaceTime them. I even declined a meeting to discuss a new property in Belgium, just because I wanted to be back here.
Hell, I haven’t even posted about Sugar Valley village, or Theo’s animal sanctuary, or the diner. Suddenly I realize I’ve been living in a bubble these last few months, isolating myself from my old life.
Ellie’s right. But not in the way she thinks. I’m getting too attached, too comfortable, too hopeful. I’m letting go of things I enjoy, work that I excel at, I’m letting go of things that make me me .
I’m altering my life for a man, again . Well, a man and his daughter, but I’m setting myself up for heartbreak all the same.
If I don’t want to fall into my old patterns, what exactly am I doing to stop it from happening?
As soon as we get back inside, my phone rings. My eyes widen a little at the screen. It’s my dad. My dad who rarely calls me. It’s always an email, sometimes a text, and even those come from his assistant half the time.
“Take it,” Liam says, noticing the look on my face. “I’ll get Poppy ready for bed.”
“Hey, Dad,” I answer hesitantly, hoping this isn’t some kind of medical emergency.
“Maya.” He says my name like it’s a relief, a cool drink after too much sun. “I need you, darling daughter. When can you be in France?”
“Umm, what? I thought you and mom were back in Shanghai.”
“Yes, yes we’re still planning to be there for New Year’s, but this acquisition is taking longer than expected. We’re going to have to come right back. The sellers seem to have concerns about us demolishing the property and selling off the land.”
He must still be in Antibes, then. That property is gorgeous, right along the coast in what I believe is the best part of the French Riviera. I was the one who scouted this resort, brought it to my dad a couple of years ago begging him to make an offer. The deal was supposed to go through last month. As far as I knew, the lawyers were finalizing everything.
“I don’t understand. They were happy to sell. And we would never do that.” When I first approached the owners, they told me how much they wanted to retire, that the resort had been a family business, but they had no children to hand it off to.
“Well, it’s in the contract that we have the right to do it. They want the clause removed.”
The lawyers will never agree. That clause protects us. If anything happens with the property, selling the land is the only way to recoup the costs.
“What can I do?” I offer. I want this deal to go through. I want Antibes as part of our portfolio.
“That’s my girl. I need you to talk to them, because they sure as hell aren’t listening to me. Plus, your French is better. Can you be here in a week?”
A week? Poppy’s winter dance recital is next Thursday, and Liam and I were talking about taking a drive to—why am I hesitating? Wasn’t I just telling myself to stop rearranging my life for a man?
But…
My head is pounding, too many conflicting emotions at war inside my skull. Liam makes me feel so many things that are completely foreign, but how can I trust any of it? Am I really that pathetic? That all he has to do is say he missed me, that he wants me in his bed, and now I’m considering skipping out on work that I’ve always loved?
Uncertainty is a burden that feels too heavy to bear. I hate that I can’t trust myself, that I keep changing my mind every five minutes like a damn child. What do you want, Maya?
I wished for the truth before. Could I do it again? But that’s not really what I’m searching for. What I want is a crystal ball. A prophecy to let me know which path protects my future heart. Could I wish for that? And more importantly, how bad would the consequences be for cheating fate?
No, I can’t. I’m done relying on magic to save me.
“Maya? Can you come or not?”