Chapter 14
fourteen
NICOLE
I could dance forever. Jakob’s hand is in mine as we dance in a circle. The music changes to a slower tempo, but we still remain in a circle, holding hands with one another. A few people leave the circle, but new ones join.
Jakob blindly accepts the hand that takes his. My eyes widen when I recognize the woman from the church. She immediately drops his hand and points her finger at me. Greek words fly from her lips. Her reddened cheeks and wide eyes show she’s clearly not happy to see me again.
“I’m sorry…” I start, and then I stop speaking because what else can I say?
Everyone in our circle stops moving, and a few of the others nearby stop as well to take in the scene. Jakob steps in front of me, forcing me to stand behind him, and begins speaking calmly in Greek to her. My stomach dips with embarrassment. I feel terrible for causing a scene at Vivian’s baby’s baptism celebration.
Jakob’s father appears, and now my vision is fully blocked from what’s happening. When Vivian arrives on the scene, her husband hot on her tail, a sick knot of dread is twisting me up inside. Worse, I have no clue what anyone is saying, so I’m left waiting anxiously for someone to give me an update on this situation.
Suddenly there’s… laughter. The woman comes around and envelops me in a tight hug. She lightly laughs against me and then kisses both my cheeks.
Vivian throws an arm around the lady and beams. “This is Thea Zoe. She thought you were a tourist.”
I kind of am, but I keep that to myself.
I turn to Jakob and ask, “Thea means aunt?”
“Correct. She’s not really our aunt. She is family but it’s distant. Maybe my father’s cousin, or second cousin? Anyway, we call her thea.”
The lady is still nodding and smiling, which is a relief and great improvement from earlier.
“I’m glad I was able to make such an impression on her.”
The lady takes my hand, and all the dancing resumes, with her leading the circle and me second in line. Jakob is on the other side of me, and when I look at him to silently ask what the heck just happened, he shrugs. I’m not exactly sure who they told her I am to Vivian, and more importantly, to Jakob, but the lady suddenly seems tickled and delighted by me. I guess as long as I’m not some random tourist setting people’s hair on fire in church, it’s all good.
The reception lasts for hours. We dance, eat amazing food, and drink wine. I can’t remember the last time I had such a wonderful time. Jakob decides to call it a night when he notices that Dafni can barely keep her eyes open and her dancing is imitating of someone who has had one too many glasses of wine. Of course, she insists she’s not tired.
When we arrive at the house, Dafni wants to sleep between Jakob and I.
“But your daddy and I don’t sleep in the same bed.”
“Tonight, we’re all going to,” she says through a big yawn. “Sleepover. I want to be in the middle.”
Jakob waits for me to answer. Does he want us to share a bed together? That seems like something a family would do. Then again, I’ve known Dafni all her life and Jakob since childhood. Our families have always seen each other as an extension of our own. Other than me wanting to sleep with him in an entirely different way, he’s been like family. I nod and Jakob pushes the two beds together to make one giant bed .
This won’t be weird. We’re all one big family.
It’s weird. It’s weird, but it’s also not. It’s fun and sweet, but I hate the little hope that keeps trying to bubble up inside me. Lying here with Dafni sleeping soundly between us brings me a joy that I can’t explain, but I don’t feel like I have a right to.
“I love her so much,” I whisper to myself.
“She loves you,” Jakob says. He looks like he wants to say more but he doesn’t. I’m thankful he doesn’t. My heart couldn’t take it if he said he loved me, but there’s no future for us. Earlier, I joked that he’d confessed his undying love, and he didn’t elaborate, just admitted to fucking up what he was trying to tell me. Jakob has warned me that with him, I’d be settling for less. He’s always made it clear that he has no intention of marriage after his disastrous relationship with Dafni’s mother, and he’s warned me not to get too hopeful.
Since Jakob and I are both too restless to sleep, we decide to go sit outside. We leave the window cracked so we’ll hear Dafni if she wakes.
“I can’t believe there are no mosquitos.” I stare up at all the stars as a gentle breeze comes through. At home, I’d never be able to sit outside at night like this in the summer .
“Greece doesn’t have the mutant mosquitos like back home, but there are places that do get some. They just don’t swarm you or drain you dry or try to carry you away.”
I try to think of more small talk, but my heart is beating mercilessly and I’m about to explode with needing answers. “Speaking of home…” I bite my bottom lip as I wait for him to turn his face toward me so I can read his expression before I finish my thought. “What happens when we leave here? Do we leave all the magic?” I laugh at that. I sound so cheesy.
Jakob, however, seems to understand exactly what I’m asking. “What do you want to happen?”
He’s putting it back on me, which annoys me. “Just tell me what your plans are. What are you thinking? What do you want to happen? I’m asking you what happens, and you’re answering with a question. Don’t deflect. Just be honest and direct with me.”
Jakob stands and begins pacing in front of me. He runs a hand over his face and then turns to face me. After a beat of silence, he sits back down and takes my hands in his. “I want us to try for a serious, committed relationship. I told Dafni you were my girlfriend, and I have no intention of taking those words back. You know how I feel about you. It wasn’t a line to keep you in my bed for fun while we’re here.”
He takes a deep breath, and his voice is heavy as he speaks. “I’m worried what people will think if we pursue this. I’m your boss; you’re my daughter’s nanny. You’re so young, and it’s going to look like I preyed upon you. That wouldn’t bother me, but I don’t want anyone to think you were na?ve and fell for it.”
“I fell for it alright,” I tease.
He gives my hand a gentle squeeze, but his smile doesn’t reach his eyes.
“I have to think of how people gossiping will affect Dafni. She’s young, but she’s going to begin school soon. People can be cruel and careless. At the end of the day, it’s not about my desires, but I have to protect the two people I love.”
I swallow thickly. “Did you confess your love for me but also admit that you can’t be with me even if you want to? Assuming the two people you love are Dafni and me. I’m confused and having a lot of mixed emotions, Jakob.”
His forehead gently presses against mine. “Yes, and no. I love you. I’m warning you there’s going to be some gossip and fallback to us being in a relationship, but I want one if you do. I also want to point out that I think you can do better.”
“Better than a wealthy, gorgeous Greek god with the most precious little girl for a daughter? You must really think I’m something.”
“I know you’re something.”
I lean back so I can stare into his eyes. “But you love me? ”
“Yes.”
“Then that’s all that matters.”
He leans forward. His lips caress mine, promising me we’re going to face the world together. It’s all I’ve ever wanted. We’ll figure everything out as it comes. Somehow, everything changed and became clearer when we came to Greece.
“I love you,” he whispers against my lips and wraps his arms around me.
“I love you,” I whimper.
He pulls back to cup my face in his palm. “I’m never letting you go. You’re mine. Does that scare you?”
“I’m not really worried about it.”
His head falls forward. “You’re such a smartass.”
I lift my middle finger up at him, and he leans over to take it between his teeth. I yelp and smack him.
“I’ve been wanting to bite that finger,” he says. “You love to point it at me.”
A yawn escapes me, and I quickly lift my hand to cover it. Jakob stands and extends his hand to help me up. “Let’s go cuddle our girl.”
Our girl. I can’t stop the giant smile that spreads across my face as warmth spreads throughout me. Dafni has always been my girl, but hearing Jakob agree makes me feel lighter on my feet as we walk to the bedroom hand in hand.