Chapter 21
On the evening of the charity ball, Carenza put on her new cream patterned gown, and had her maid pile her hair high on top of her head with two ringlets hanging down on either side of her face.
Tickets to the ball had sold quickly, and the committee were expecting a packed ballroom.
The duchess had arranged for both the Cartwrights and Mrs. Mountjoy to speak before the ball started and had high hopes that they would inspire the attendees to donate even more money to their worthy causes.
Carenza’s only hope was that Julian’s reputation would be enhanced from being one of the first to support such causes. Anyone who heard Miss Cartwright speak would never think ill of her or believe that her benefactors had been engaged in nefarious activities to hurt children.
She put a touch of rouge to her cheeks and lips and donned a pair of diamond-and-gold earrings and the matching necklace her parents had given her for her twenty-first birthday. She added a thin gold bracelet Julian had given her one Christmas.
Julian …
She hadn’t spoken to him since his extraordinary proposal in her bed, and she still didn’t know what to say to put things right between them.
She’d panicked—there was no other way of describing her reaction—and had pushed him away both physically and emotionally.
It wasn’t like Julian to behave impulsively, and the fact that she might have wounded him with her abrupt dismissal of his proposal preyed on her mind.
Romantic thoughts of them sharing their lives together kept intruding in her imagination.
That they’d be happy together she had no doubt, but her position in society meant she was not considered his equal.
The thought of him gradually realizing she’d never be totally acceptable to the ton, and him exhausting himself trying to ensure that she was, unsettled her.
But she wanted him … that she couldn’t deny. Others might find him cool and distant but she knew the real man, his unflinching support of causes dear to his heart and his loyalty as a friend, even to those who hadn’t deserved it in the slightest.
Allegra came in as the maid withdrew. She’d dressed in blue with a peacock feather in her hair and looked rather regal.
“Why are you still sitting here?” Allegra asked. “We’ll be late, and the duchess will be cross.”
“I’m sorry.” Carenza stood, picked up her shawl and reticule from the bed, and went over to the door. “I was woolgathering.”
“About Julian?” Allegra, who could be far too knowing, smirked. “Every time I’ve mentioned his name in the past week, you’ve gone off into a dream.” She nudged her sister in the ribs. “You should marry him, you know.”
“You know how I feel about marriage,” Carenza replied as they went down the stairs.
“Don’t be missish. Julian is nothing like Hector. I’m fairly certain he’d say yes if you broke that silly agreement of yours and asked.”
“Why do you think that?” Carenza tried to keep her voice light, but she desperately wanted to know the answer.
“Because he’s in love with you.” Allegra gave her a pitying look. “It’s obvious to anyone who sees how he treats you.”
“He is renowned for treating ladies well.”
“He’s different with you.” Allegra paused as the butler opened the door and the carriage arrived in the square. “Less charming, more real.”
They were assisted into the coach by the footman and sat on opposite sides to prevent their skirts being creased.
Carenza cleared her throat. “What if I did ask Julian to marry me, and he was horrified at the very idea?”
Allegra regarded her curiously. “Have you?”
“No.”
“Then maybe you should,” Allegra advised, and sat back as if that was the end of the conversation. And perhaps it was.
Julian arrived at the Grantleigh mansion just as Mrs. Mountjoy was walking up the steps. He offered her his arm, and they continued into the vast hallway where servants were still scurrying about setting things to rights for the evening ahead.
“You look rather splendid, ma’am,” Julian observed as they walked into the main ballroom where a string quartet was already tuning up.
Mrs. Mountjoy was dressed in dark blue with roses on her bodice.
“And you look unhappy.”
“I’m smiling, am I not?” Julian countered. “I intend to enjoy my evening immensely.”
She patted his hand. “Would you like some advice?”
“Not particularly.”
“You should marry Carenza Musgrove.”
“What makes you think she’d be willing to marry me?”
“Good Lord.” Mrs. Mountjoy stopped walking. “Did she turn you down?”
“That is none of your business,” Julian replied with a lightness he was far from feeling.
“She did.” Mrs. Mountjoy nodded. “That’s why you’re so miserable. Good for her.”
“What’s good about it?” Julian asked and immediately regretted it.
“It’s probably the first time in your life that you’ve been turned down for something you want.”
“Hardly.”
“I like her even more now.” Mrs. Mountjoy smiled as he held the door open into an anteroom at the rear of the ballroom. “I hope she leads you a merry dance.”
Barely repressing his indignation, Julian smiled as he saw the Cartwrights were already in the room. Mr. Cartwright looked his usual calm self, but Miss Cartwright was frowning, her hands knotted together on her lap. She wore a plain brown dress that Julian assumed was her Sunday best.
“Good evening, Miss Cartwright,” Julian greeted her. “Are you looking forward to the ball?”
She looked up at him. “I can’t say that I am, sir. I never liked dancing or crowded spaces. I’m only here because my brother insisted upon it. He said that if all these people are willing to support our cause, the least I could do was show my face.”
“I tend to agree with your brother,” Julian said. “You are the best advocate for your cause, Miss Cartwright. Your integrity and serenity shine through. After hearing you speak, no one could believe that either you or Mr. Cartwright have anything but the best intentions toward children.”
“Thank you for saying that.” She hesitated. “I have often misjudged your seriousness about our cause, but organizing this ball for our benefit shows that you are indeed sincere.”
“That’s very good of you, but I wasn’t instrumental in arranging the ball. Although, I am fully supportive of the committee’s efforts.”
Miss Cartwright cleared her throat. “Is your brother attending?”
“I believe so.”
“Oh.”
“Did you particularly wish to speak to him? I can ask him to seek you out.”
“No! Thank you.” She shrank back in her seat. “Please don’t draw unnecessary attention upon me.”
“My brother is the best of men. I sometimes wish I had his joie de vivre.” Miss Cartwright didn’t reply, and Julian was at somewhat of a loss about how to proceed. “Do you wish me to ask him to leave you alone?”
“I don’t know what I want,” she blurted out.
“Then perhaps you should simply go with your instincts?” Julian suggested. “If he seeks you out, he won’t force his company on you if it isn’t wanted.”
“Miss Cartwright, if I might offer you some advice?” Mrs. Mountjoy said. “Aragon Laurent is a true gentleman. If you ask him to stop bothering you, he will.” She glanced at Julian. “And if he doesn’t, then I’m sure Mr. Laurent will set him straight.”
“Absolutely.” Julian nodded.
Miss Cartwright still looked worried, but Julian put it down to her anxiety about the upcoming event. “I have no intention of marrying.” Miss Cartwright raised her chin. “I am devoted to my work.”
Mrs. Mountjoy patted her hand. “Then that’s all you need to say to any man who wishes to have a relationship with you. Most of them will take the hint, and, if they don’t, Mr. Laurent and I will make sure they never bother you again.”
The door opened, and the duchess, dressed in silver and white to match the glitter of her diamonds, strode into the room along with several members of the committee, including Mrs. Sheraton. She beamed at the Cartwrights and came across to take Mrs. Mountjoy’s hand.
“Anna, how lovely to see you again. Miss Cartwright, Mr. Cartwright, Mr. Laurent, how good of you all to come.”
Julian excused himself soon after her greetings and went to check on the state of the ballroom.
The duchess had excelled in the preparations.
Perfume from the large flower arrangement drifted across the room along with smoke from a hundred lit candles in the massive chandeliers that hung from the center of the painted ceiling.
Fires had been lit in the stone fireplaces on the end walls.
When the guests arrived, it would become unbearably hot and crowded—the smell of bodies overriding the sweeter scents of the flowers.
He heard a familiar voice at the top of the stairs leading up to the ballroom and watched as Allegra, who appeared to be urging her sister to hurry up, went past the doors and into the antechamber beyond.
He had to admit to a certain trepidation in meeting Carenza—something he wasn’t used to.
But her immediate rejection of his proposal had hurt.
In fairness, he’d been almost as shocked as she had when the words popped out of his mouth, but he knew they were from his heart and that he meant them. Carenza obviously didn’t agree.
The duchess and her entourage came to the ballroom doors, chattering like a flock of starlings.
As the clock struck the hour, voices echoed up from the entrance hall below, and Julian quietly took his place at the end of the receiving line, ready to welcome the incoming guests.
He glanced along the line but caught only a glimpse of Carenza, who was behind Mr. Cartwright.
He had little time to think after that, as a stream of guests came up the stairs like a wave of breeding salmon and worked their way along the line and then into the ballroom where the string quartet played quietly on the balcony.
When the bulk of the guests had passed by, the duchess decreed they should all join her in the ballroom for the speeches.