24. Kane
CHAPTER 24
KANE
“ I really have to hand it to you, Kane,” Maddie said, looking around at the farmers market, at the various booths and stalls and the townspeople walking around with smiles on their faces. “This thing came together better than I ever thought it would.”
“I thought you were probably going to pull out and run away,” Bradley said. “I mean, even before you said you were going to do that, I was sort of waiting for it to happen.”
Maddie slugged his arm. “Can you be nice for one day?” she demanded. “Look how much work has gone into this.”
“Sorry, man,” Bradley said. “I did think it, though.”
“That’s okay,” Kane said. “I can’t really blame you. I thought I was going to bail too, for a while there.”
“What changed your mind?”
“Oh my God. Stop asking invasive questions,” Maddie said. She threw a little grin in Taylor’s direction, and Kane was able to infer that the two of them had discussed the matter. A part of him wondered what had been said. Had Taylor told Maddie about the fact that he’d found a letter from his father? Did Maddie know that his father had forgiven him for the sins of his past?
He found that he didn’t really care either way. He liked Maddie. He was glad to have this friendship back in his life. But he cared more about his relationship with Taylor.
And he suspected that Maddie knew that was the real reason he had decided to stick around, because she took Bradley by the arm and began to pull him away. “Let’s go check out the petting zoo,” she said.
“What? I don’t want to pet a bunch of smelly goats!”
“Oh, come on.” Maddie dragged Bradley away, and as they left, she tossed a wink over her shoulder at Taylor.
Taylor laughed as they watched their friends go. “He’s never been much for subtlety,” she observed. “Bradley’s great, and I love him for Maddie, but he’s got as much tact as a wrecking ball sometimes.”
Kane had to laugh. “That’s true,” he said. “He always was my best friend, but you’re right. Sometimes he can be downright impossible.”
“Are you all right? He didn’t hurt your feelings, did he?”
“No, I deserved that. He didn’t say anything that wasn’t true.”
“Still, Maddie’s right that he could be a little nicer about it.”
“Oh, I have you to be nicer to me than I deserve. I don’t need Bradley to do it.” He pulled Taylor in for a quick kiss.
When he released her, he saw that she was looking indignant. “You do deserve for people to be nice to you,” she objected. “You should be kinder to yourself , Kane. That’s what kept you away for such a long time, you know. It wasn’t that the town couldn’t forgive you — you can see that they’re welcoming you back. It was that you could never forgive yourself.”
Kane had to look away. Taylor said things like this sometimes and they hit him right in the gut. She was right, he knew — he’d spent years punishing himself for what had happened back then, and he owed it to himself to stop. He owed it to her to stop.
That was what was going to make it possible. Taylor couldn’t go through life wondering whether Kane’s guilt was going to get the better of him and set him running again. She shouldn’t have to worry about that. And so, for her sake, he would have to get past his guilt.
Jeff Chesterfield was approaching. Kane squared his shoulders and turned to face him. “Hey, Jeff,” he said. “It looks like everything’s going pretty well so far. What do you think?”
“It looks great to me,” Jeff said. “My grandkids are at the face-painting booth. They keep going back for more. Donna says they’re going to have their whole bodies covered in paint by the time the day is over. We’re going to have to hose them down before we let them back in the house.”
“I’m sure they’ll love that,” Taylor said. “It’s the perfect day to play in the sprinkler.”
“I really have to hand it to you,” Jeff said. “To both of you.” He focused his attention on Kane. “When you came to me asking for permission to do this, I won’t lie — I thought it was a terrible idea. I thought it would be a mess, that nothing would be achieved, and that I’d spend the weeks afterward cleaning up the land.”
“What made you agree, then?” Taylor asked.
Jeff took a breath. “The thing is that I knew your father, Kane, and I know he would have wanted me to give you a second chance. And I believe in second chances. In this case, it paid off remarkably. I was wrong about you, son. I’m glad you’ve come back to Miller Creek. I hope you stick around.”
Kane couldn’t quite articulate the feeling that welled up inside him at those words. It felt — just as it had when he had discovered the letter — as if his father was with him, telling him that it was time to forgive himself. He wondered whether anyone other than Jeff Chesterfield could have truly created that feeling in him. This was the man he’d needed forgiveness from all this time, and now he had it. What was more, it felt as though Jeff might actually be impressed with the way he had turned his life around.
Donna called out to Jeff from across the grounds, and Jeff gave them a last grin and turned and ambled away.
Taylor gave Kane’s arm a squeeze. “How about that?” she said. “I bet you never thought you would get something like that out of Jeff Chesterfield, after everything that’s happened between the two of you. Can you believe it?”
“I can’t,” Kane said. “But, Taylor — none of this would have happened if it weren’t for you.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’d never have mustered up the courage to do something like this,” he said. “It was all your idea. And even after you pitched it to me, I was nowhere near brave enough to take it to Jeff on my own. It only happened because you pushed me.”
He took her hand and laced his fingers through hers.
“I just hope you know,” he said quietly, “you’ve changed my life. You’ve turned it around. My dad was the one who got me to come back here, and I’m glad he did, because if he hadn’t you and I never would have come back into one another’s lives — but without you, I would have taken care of the legal matters I needed to address and gone back to Detroit. You’re the one who inspired me to change.”
“I never forgot the fact that you came to me all those years ago,” Taylor said quietly. “When you needed help after the fire, I was the one you turned to, and I rejected you. I’ve always regretted it.”
“You were only a kid,” Kane reminded her.
“So were you,” she said. “When that fire happened, you were a kid too. You’ve been holding yourself accountable for it all these years, but you’ve been harder on yourself than you should have been. If I can be forgiven for being a bad friend to you, you can be forgiven for starting the fire.” She smiled slightly. “We both made mistakes that day. We both did things we regret. I’m glad we each had this chance to make it right.”
Kane thought, my mistake was bigger than yours was .
And then he thought, maybe that doesn’t matter anymore. Maybe it’s time to let the past go… and think about the future instead.
“I’m thinking of leaving my job,” he said.
Taylor’s brow furrowed as she tried to keep up with the shift in topic. “You’re going to quit working at the auto shop? You’re so good with cars.”
“There’s an auto shop here in Miller Creek,” he said. “Maybe they would take me on. This is my town, and now that I have a second chance to put things right — I want to come back here. I want to build the life here that I wish I had never given up.”
She stared up at him, her eyes going wide. “You want to stay?”
“I want to stay,” he confirmed.
Her breathing was slightly uneven. “The house… you already sold me your share of the house…”
“Oh, I wouldn’t dream of asking for that back,” he said quickly.
“No, that’s not what I was going to say,” she said. “I didn’t think you were going to ask for it back. But… you sold it to me thinking that you weren’t going to want to stay in town. I don’t feel right about that now that you’ve changed your mind.”
“I sold it to you to pay for this event,” he pointed out. “I don’t have any regrets about that.”
Taylor hesitated. “You gave me a really good deal,” she pointed out. “I paid a whole lot less than that house is worth.”
“I suppose so.”
“Move in with me.”
Kane raised his eyebrows. “Do you mean that?”
It was what he had hoped she would say — but it had been nothing but a pipe dream. He’d had no expectation that it would happen. After all, the house was hers now. The fact that he had chosen to come back to Miller Creek didn’t change that.
He took her hand and led her off to one side. “I want to make sure you’re asking me this for the right reasons,” he said quietly. “I didn’t decide to stay here because I want to force you to accelerate a relationship. I’d never want you to feel pressured into anything. I love what you and I have been exploring together, and…” He chuckled. “Now we know that my dad would have been into it, so that’s a thing. But that doesn’t mean you’re under any obligation. I’m happy to rent an apartment. We can keep seeing each other casually, or— or even not at all. I know you always thought I would go home eventually. You didn’t get into this thinking it would be a long-term thing.”
“No, I didn’t,” she agreed. “But I hoped it would, Kane. Even though I knew there was no justification for that hope. Even though I knew I was being ridiculous wishing for it, and you were definitely going to go back home. Even then, a part of me wished you would stay.” She took a deep breath. “I think I’ve been falling for you for a very long time.”
Kane closed his eyes and let the weight of those words wash over him.
“But you’re right,” she said quickly. “I know that choosing to stay in Miller Creek doesn’t have to mean choosing me . If you’d rather get your own place, I completely understand.”
“Are you kidding?” Kane asked. He pulled her close and kissed her briefly. “You’re the main reason I want to stay, Taylor. This is a nice town, and I like it a lot, but I’d have been perfectly happy to move on if it weren’t for you. You’re the one who makes me want to stick around. You’re the reason I almost stayed ten years ago. You’re the reason I want to stay now.”
Taylor let out a long breath, and Kane felt her shiver slightly. “Move in with me,” she said again. “Let’s make this thing official. That’s what I want. And for what it’s worth, I think your dad would have wanted that too.”
And what she was offering was what Kane wanted more than anything in the world.
He nodded, smiled down at her, and kissed her again.