Chapter 59
CHAPTER 59
DIXIE
I realized my mistake about three minutes after sitting in the garden. I didn’t have a tissue or anything to wipe my nose with. I didn’t know where to go. My phone was in my purse in the dining room. I couldn’t call for a ride. We were too far out for me to really walk anywhere.
The garden was quiet, the kind of quiet that made your thoughts louder. I sat on the stone bench and stared at the fountain. More like I stared at the spot where Hayes had fucked me just an hour or so ago. My hands trembled in my lap, and I clenched them into fists, nails digging into my palms. The sting grounded me, kept me from spiraling further.
I needed to get myself together so I could go inside and get my purse. Then I was going to escape. I didn’t think I would ever see any of these people again. My heart twisted and the tears burned the backs of my eyes.
Hayes. His face, his voice, his words—they all replayed in my mind like a broken record. The way he’d looked at me, the way he’d offered me that money, like I was some kind of problem to be solved. Like I was just another transaction. My chest tightened, and I pressed a hand to my sternum, willing myself to breathe. In. Out. In. Out.
That just made me think of Hayes again.
I should’ve seen it coming. Maybe I did, deep down. Hayes was charming, sure, but he was also reckless, unpredictable. We had hooked up at a party, after all. That was my own stupid fault. I fell for the hot, rich guy. I let myself believe I was more than just a piece of ass to him. Stupid. So stupid.
I wiped at my face with the back of my hand, my cheeks wet with tears I hadn’t realized I was crying. My mascara was probably smeared, my carefully done makeup ruined. But I had to dry it up.
“Fuck it,” I muttered and got to my feet.
I didn’t care who saw my tear-stained face. I was sure I wasn’t the first woman to be left jilted by one of the Bancroft men and I knew I wouldn’t be the last. I put my shoulders back and marched back into the venue.
My brave face evaporated the second I saw the faces of some of the wives and a few of the men. I didn’t dare weave through the crowd to get my purse. Turned out I wasn’t as brave as I tried to pretend I was. I rushed into the bathroom and into a stall, locking the door behind me. I sat down on the toilet, not caring that I was sitting on the seat in an obnoxiously expensive dress. The poor dress had been used and abused all night. I doubted the designer had fucking on a stone bench or sitting on a public toilet seat in mind when he envisioned the dress.
I pulled some of the toilet paper off the roll and dabbed at my eyes. I stood, tossed it in the toilet, and grabbed more toilet paper to wipe my nose.
The bathroom door creaked open, and I froze, holding my breath. The click of heels echoed on the tile floor, accompanied by the soft swish of fabric. I stayed still, hoping whoever it was would do their business, then go away.
“Dixie?” The voice was soft but unmistakable—Diana. “Are you in here?”
I didn’t answer. Maybe if I stayed silent, she’d leave. But footsteps came closer, and then a shadow appeared under the stall door.
“Dixie, I know you’re in there,” Diana said gently. “Can I come in? Or can you come out?”
I wiped my face one last time with the toilet paper. My legs felt like jelly but I unlocked the stall and opened the door.
“Dixie,” Diana said softly, her voice filled with concern. “Are you okay?”
I shook my head, fresh tears spilling down my cheeks. “No.”
Diana didn’t say anything else. Instead, she grabbed a few tissues from the table in the corner and gently wiped away my smudged makeup. She ran a cool, wet cloth under the faucet and held it to the back of my neck, the sensation helping to calm my racing heart.
“Breathe,” she said, her voice soothing. “Just breathe.”
I did as she said, taking slow, deep breaths until the sobs subsided. Diana handed me a bottle of water and walked me to the sofa in the corner. The bathroom was more like a mini-apartment with bottles of water, toiletries, and the couch which was supposed to be for nursing mothers. Diana sat down beside me. She just sat quietly and let me pull myself together.
She got up and grabbed the box of tissues, handing me a few more.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I can’t seem to get my emotions under control. I’m never like this.”
“You’re pregnant, sweetie.” She smiled. “You are a pod. No control of your emotions or your body.”
I gave a watery laugh. “Great.”
I wiped my face again, the tissues damp and crumpled in my hand. “I don’t know what to do,” I admitted, my voice shaky. “Everything feels like it’s falling apart.”
Diana reached over and squeezed my hand. “It feels that way now, but it won’t always.”
I nodded, though I wasn’t sure I believed her. How could I not feel alone when the person who had made me feel so alive was now the source of my pain? Hayes—his name alone sent a sharp pang through my chest.
“Let me help you,” Diana said. “Hudson told me what happened.”
I groaned. “I’m so embarrassed.”
“Don’t be,” she said. “You didn’t do anything to be embarrassed about.”
“I just don’t know what to say,” I said. “I’m at a loss for words. Earlier, it seemed like things were good. I should have known he wasn’t. I feel so stupid. So foolish. You know what happened earlier. I just can’t resist that man.”
She laughed. “Trust me, I know that affliction. These Bancroft men have a way of getting under your skin and capturing your heart. They don’t let go. Once they’re in there, they’re there for good. But I promise you, it’s not all bad.”
I dabbed at my eyes again. “I feel so utterly lost. I’m not this person. I’m strong and independent. I don’t get caught up. I don’t fall for charming men.”
“You are strong and independent,” she said.
“Thanks.”
“There are a few people outside who’d like to speak with you,” she said softly.
I paled, my stomach twisting into knots. “I don’t want to talk to anyone. Not like this. I’m an absolute mess. I’m ready to go home. Do you think you could get my purse? I’ll call for an Uber.”
Diana squeezed my hand. “Trust me, it will help. You want to talk to them. We’ll take you out the back way. No one else will see you.”
“Fine,” I murmured.
Reluctantly, I let her lead me outside. We walked to an outdoor table lit with several candles—an extension of the wedding venue for people who needed fresh air or a smoke break.
Hudson, Isaac, and Grayson were waiting for me, their expressions a mix of concern and maybe even disappointment.
“Dixie,” Grayson said, his voice calm but firm. “We need to talk.”
I nodded, my heart pounding as I sat down. Diana stayed by my side, her hand still holding mine.
“We need to apologize for Hayes,” Isaac said.
I felt like I had to defend myself. “I guess you guys know I’m pregnant.”
“We know.” Hudson nodded. “Although I just found out tonight.”
“Hayes told me a few days ago,” Isaac said. “After he found out.”
“And I just found out when I found these guys in the kitchen,” Grayson said.
“I swear, I never asked him for a penny,” I said. “I want nothing from him. I don’t know where he got that idea.”
“Your mother,” Isaac said.
“My mother told him I was pregnant,” I said. “I know. She had no right. I haven’t talked to her about it, but I will.”
“No, your mother asked Hayes to write a check and walk away from you and the kid,” Hudson said.
I frowned and shook my head. “What? No. Why?” My voice trembled with disbelief. “Why would she do that? She doesn’t even really know Hayes. She’s only met him one time.”
Hudson exchanged a glance with Isaac before speaking. “Apparently, she thinks she knows our family. She suggested a financial settlement to ensure you’d be taken care of and that Hayes could move on.”
“Move on?” I echoed, my voice rising. “As if this is some kind of transaction? As if I’m some problem to be solved with money?”
Grayson leaned forward. “We don’t agree with it, Dixie. None of us do. But we wanted you to understand what was behind his outburst earlier.”
I buried my face in my hands. My mother had always been overbearing, but this? This was beyond anything I could have imagined. “I didn’t ask for any of this,” I whispered. “I didn’t ask for her to interfere. I wanted to figure things out on my own terms. And it was never about money for me.”
“It got to him,” Isaac said. “He started drinking and it all came to a head. He’s dealing with a lot of unresolved fear about being a dad. And he handled it the total wrong way. This is not him. You know that.”
Grayson leaned forward, his expression serious. “We want you to know that we won’t allow this to happen. Nobody is turning their back on you. That baby is a Bancroft. We’re a lot of things, but we stick together.”
I swallowed hard, my mind racing. “I want to talk to Hayes,” I said, my voice trembling. “I need to find him and make sure he knows I did not do this. I don’t want his stupid money.”
Hudson shook his head. “He’s been sent home. And we think you should go home, too. Let him sleep it off. If you talk to him now, it’s just going to lead to hurt feelings. He’s going to say things he can’t take back but certainly doesn’t mean.”
I hesitated, torn between the need to confront Hayes and the exhaustion weighing me down. My head felt heavy, my body drained from the emotional whirlwind of the night.
“They’re right,” Diana said softly. “Go home. Rest. Things will look clearer in the morning.”
I nodded reluctantly. “Fine. Thank you.”
Diana and Hudson drove me back to my place after Diana retrieved my things, offering words of comfort on the way. They walked me up to my unit, and Hudson paused at the door.
“Hayes is a good man,” he said. “One of the best of us. He just needs time and a chance to explain where all this behavior came from.”
I nodded, though I wasn’t sure if I believed him. The image of Hayes offering me money, his words slurred and his eyes hollow, was burned into my mind.
“Thank you,” I said softly.
Diana hugged me before they left. “You’re not alone in this, Dixie. Remember that. You have a big family that is absolutely going to be there for you and the baby no matter what happens.”
“Thanks, guys.”
When they were gone, I locked the door and leaned against it. I barely made it to the couch before my legs gave out.
I wasn’t sure what to do. Part of me wanted to believe Hudson—that Hayes was a good man who had just made a mistake. But another part of me couldn’t shake the feeling that I’d seen a side of him I wasn’t sure I could forgive.
The idea that he’d be willing to part with me and our child for a cool several million just to walk away, was devastating. It made me question everything I thought I knew about him, about us.
I didn’t know if I was willing to go all in with him now. I didn’t know if he deserved to be near me or his child. He hurt me tonight. I would never allow him to do that to my child.