Jett #3
Diane: Merry Christmas. Can one already be hungover at ten at night?
I chuckle.
Lloyd: Have you been drinking? Are you already on Santa’s naughty list for next year?
Diane: Maybe I like being a little naughty from time to time.
Just like that, my dick hardens at the thought of naughty Fallon. I can’t help but imagine her in naughty Santa lingerie. Her full breasts, her naturally puffy lips, her curvy hips, her—
My dirty thoughts are broken by the ping of my phone. I look down at it.
Diane: I’ve been drinking since first thing this morning. We had some guests in their twenties who like to spend Christmas Day drinking. I’m too old for this shit.
Lloyd: How old are you?
I love this running joke of ours. Of course I know she’s thirty-nine, but it’s become fun.
Diane: Old enough that I had to get my camera film developed at a store.
Lloyd: Ah, but did you have to wait a week or was it only an hour?
Diane: An hour.
Lloyd: That’s a big clue. I had to wait a week.
Diane: How old are you?
Lloyd: Old enough that I still remember the phone numbers of all my childhood friends, but I can’t remember the password I created yesterday.
Diane: LOL. So true. Really, Lloyd, how old are you?
Hmm, maybe I should be a little more specific. Nah, I like this game too much.
Lloyd: Old enough that I once bought ten CDs for a penny. Unfortunately, it took ten years and hundreds of dollars to cancel that subscription.
Diane: Lloyd! Just tell me. It’s all I want for Christmas.
Lloyd: I once told my son about the ten-CDs-for-a-penny deal we used to have. I don't know if he thought I was lying about what a CD was, what a penny was, what the mail was, or all of the above.
Diane: Are you ever going to tell me? I need more information about you.
Here’s my opening.
Lloyd: When we meet in person, you’ll find out everything.
She doesn’t respond. In the over two months we’ve been talking like this, I haven’t once mentioned meeting in person.
Lloyd: Sorry. Didn’t mean to push.
Diane: No, you’re right. It’s time. I’ve got the New Year, and then it’s my daughter’s birthday. Perhaps after that?
Lloyd: No rush. We’re on your timeline. I’d like it to happen though. I want to see you, angel face.
I’d prefer it to be after my season is over so I’m totally available to her, but we’re pretty close, and beggars can’t be choosers.
Diane: I think I’m ready. The madness in my life is starting to die down.
I saw somewhere that Bailey Hart is walking again. What a relief for that young girl.
Lloyd: Any big New Year’s plans?
Diane: Just a party at home with some friends and family. My daughter is having her friends over and, fortunately, I love their parents. Plus, we’ve got this cold front coming in. If the temperature outside is less than my age, don’t invite me anywhere.
Lloyd: Ah, another clue for your age.
Diane: I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.
She’s so damn cute.
Lloyd: Besides the copious amount of alcohol, how was your Christmas?
Diane: Nice deflection. Christmas was nice. Lots of people. Lots of laughter. My daughter was showered with gifts and love from everyone. She was beaming. What more could I want?
That’s what I desperately want. Lots of people, love, and laughter. Besides love for my children, I have the exact opposite.
Lloyd: She’s a lucky little girl, and you’re a lucky woman.
Diane: I know. What about you?
Lloyd: Unfortunately, not quite as full as yours.
Diane: I’m sorry. We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.
I polish off my bottle of wine, pouring the last bit into my glass. With a little liquid courage under my belt, I suddenly feel the need to unload after an emotional day. I’ve never had a woman to talk to before.
Lloyd: I think I once briefly mentioned that my son suffers from severe anxiety.
He saw a shitty marriage, a dad who wasn’t home at all, and his sister left when he was ten and never came back until recently.
Even now, her appearances are few and far between.
He tried to hurt himself. Twice. It was the wakeup call I needed.
I changed my workday to be home and present for him.
My ex and I were already separated and tried living together for his sake, but I think that made things worse.
I’d rather 100% be with him 50% of the time than be 10% present 100% of the time. Does that make sense?
Diane: It does. I obviously understand. The same went for my ex. He’s a better father now than when we were married, even though he only has her half the time.
Lloyd: That’s how it was for me. And my heart honestly breaks for my daughter and my ex-wife.
I fear their relationship is beyond repair.
My ex-wife made a mistake and lost a daughter for it, and my daughter, in turn, lost a mother.
She’s missing that extra thing women get from their moms. She’s so obviously in need of a maternal presence in her life.
I wish they’d mend fences. It would be good for both of them, especially my daughter.
Diane: Do you ever wish life had a do-over?
Lloyd: Every damn day.