Chapter Two
My first stop is food since my stomach has been growling for hours. I’ve just become accustomed to ignoring it, so it’s been easy enough to do until this point. The dining hall is amazing. There’s any and all kinds of food anyone could ever want, almost. I stack a tray full of a variety of things, and all I have to do to pay for it is scan the little square on my student ID at the register.
I try to pace myself when I sit down to eat, but I’m famished and possibly look like a pig gobbling it up. I manage to at least keep my face out of it like them. Luckily for me, there isn’t but one other person in here, and their face is buried in their phone.
Apparently, that’s going to be something I need to get so that I don’t seem like one of the weirdos that made it all the way to college with strict parentals still controlling me. As I finish, I take my trash to the designated place in the corner, stuffing the apple and banana in my bag so that it doesn’t get wasted.
Making it back outside, I debate in my head where I need to go first as I walk toward the front gate. The feeling of my naked skin under my borrowed clothes, mandates my first stop. I’d seen a store around the corner when I first got here, so that’s where I go.
The reason it’d caught my attention is because it advertises on signs in the window bargains for students. As soon as I walk in, the sweet scent of jasmine is like a blast to the senses. Not that it's a bad thing. It's actually quite pleasant and relaxing. The source of the smell makes itself known as a small woman walks through a curtain on the back wall and comes over to me. If her scent wasn't enough, the way she carries herself would be. I've had dealings with plenty of alphas at the compound. They don't seem to affect betas the way that they do us omegas. Then again, there weren't too many omegas there to compare notes with, either.
"Hello, hello. Welcome to Threads and More," she says. "How can I help you today?"
I must still be feeling the vibes from all of the friendly people I've met so far today, so that's why I tell her the truth. "I need a complete new wardrobe."
She nods in understanding with a quick lift of her eyebrows. "You've come to the right place. We've got plenty of choices to choose from."
We spend the next two hours going through her entire collection in her store. Even had an embarrassing situation where I had absolutely no idea what size I am, and we had to guess. I'd picked up a pair of panties and hid them under the stash growing on my arm. When I got into the dressing room, I'd torn the tag off and set it to the side to pay for them when I do the rest. That way I don't have to feel awkward explaining why I needed them now, and I definitely wasn't going to try on clothes wearing nothing.
She handed me outfit after outfit through the dressing room door until I had a growing stack in the corner that was my keep pile. At first she tried giving me super bright colors, but I didn't like the way that they made me stand out. After I handed the third or fourth set back, I told her no ‘attention’ colors. She didn't ask why, so I didn't have to explain my reasoning. That's when the pile really started growing.
I'd asked her if I could wear one of them out of the store, and she was excited that I'd asked. Even brought new pantie and bra sets for me. Said that I couldn't wear new clothes with old under things. Unbeknownst to her, I'd already put on the pair I'd be wearing out. The bra fit perfectly and had this delicate lace overlaying the padding on the cups. How she guessed my size on that, I'll never know. Maybe she's just done it long enough to know, or maybe it was just a good assumption based on all of my other sizes.
I settled on a cute pair of black overalls that are baggy around my hips and legs with a small white shirt underneath. If I raise my hands above my head, a tiny sliver of skin shows between the two. It's risqué, and I love it. We would be severely punished for wearing something like this on the compound. Not only because I'm a girl wearing pants meant for boys, but the skin showing would've been the reason I'd have gotten the ax. I smile at my reflection, knowing that no one but me has the control over that anymore.
When I go to pay, I've got enough clothes to last for weeks, including under things and a couple sleep sets, plus a new pair of shoes, all for under three hundred dollars. I'm sure my eyes go wide at the total. "Are you sure you rang everything up right?"
She laughs, "I sure did. We did say the best bargains around for students. You guys get thirty percent off. Even on the already clearanced stuff."
"You don't need to see my student ID?" I ask curiously.
"Nope," she tells me, popping the p. "Normally I'd ask, but let's just say, you're not the first one to come through here trying to start over."
There's a sadness in her eyes that makes me want to hug her. For a moment, I consider asking her her story, but I'm not ready to share mine, so that wouldn't be fair. Besides, right after she comments, her expression switches back over to one of happy politeness.
I give her the best thing I can. My gratitude. "Thank you for taking the time to help me today. And...everything...else. I truly appreciate it."
"I know you do," she replies smiling. "You're most welcome and please come back to visit anytime."
"I will," I promise as she packs all of my new things into a few reusable tote bags and hands them over.
The next stop on my shopping list is the big department store further up the road. Of course, being new to everything in the outside world, I get distracted by something before I make it there.
I pass a cute, little storefront where girls are inside getting their hair cut and styled. It only takes seconds for me to make the decision. I'm inside and giving the girls my name before I even know what I'm doing.
A girl with brown hair cut all the way up to her chin calls me over to her chair, giving me direction on where to set my bags. As I take the seat she offers, I get a soft citrus scent from her, and I can tell instantly that she's a beta.
She introduces herself as she slings a cape around my body. "Hi, my name is Catherine. What are we wanting to get done today?"
I hadn't honestly given it any thought other than wanting...no, needing, a change. "I don't know, really. I just want to cut a lot of it off."
Her eyes narrow like she's thinking on something before she asks, "In that case, think you could trust me?"
"Sure," I tell her. I'm a little anxious since her hair is so short, and I certainly don't want that. Honestly, though, it's just hair and it'll grow back. Pulling the tie out of my hair and letting it flow down in its unruly mess, I grimace at her, knowing she's got her work cut out for her.
Her eyes go wide, "Wow, that's a lot of hair."
"I've never had it cut," I tell her honestly, expecting judgement and getting the exact opposite.
"Are you serious?" she asks, amazed. Even going as far as to call everyone else's attention to it. They then oh and ah over it, too.
After the new wears off, she sets to work as she chats away with the other girls. Sometimes she includes me in the conversation and tries to get me to talk about myself, but I avoid that as much as possible. My obvious changing of the subject or short answers doesn't bother her in the least. As someone completely comfortable in their element, she carries the conversation no matter which way it steers. All while working magic on my hair.
I hold my breath as she takes the scissors to the first few pieces and I watch huge chunks fall to the floor. After there looks to be more hair on the floor than on my head, she brings out some liquid, stirring it until she's satisfied it's mixed well enough. Then she does the strangest thing with aluminum foil, and by the time that she's done, I look like I'm wearing an oddly shaped foil hat. She puts me in a different chair with a dome that closes over the top of my head. The warmth feels good and makes talking impossible as I can't hear the conversation now.
My heart feels heavy as I watch her sweep up my hair off the floor. Those strands have always been a small part of who I am. Since birth, they've been with me. But then, I was never given the choice on that. We weren't allowed to cut our hair at all. God help the couple people who thought it'd be cute to try when we were younger. Of course, that rule never applied to the boys. They could cut theirs, along with wearing pants. By the time the dome shuts off, I'm no longer sad about the missing hair. I'm ecstatic and can't wait to see the final result.
One that I don't have to wait for. Catherine turns me so that I can't see myself in the mirror as she removes the tiny foil pieces out of my hair before walking me over to the chair at the sink. She carries on talking to one of the other girls as she lays me back, hair in the sink. I swear to all that's holy, I feel like I've actually died and gone to heaven when she brings a sprayer of warm water to my head and starts rinsing out my hair. The feel of her hands running through my hair added to the sweet scent of the shampoo mixing with her subtle-citrus beta scent is enough to have me almost falling asleep. I never knew that simply having your hair washed by another person could feel this good.
It ends all too soon, and we're back in the normal chair with her towel drying my hair. I get a quick glimpse of what she's done, and a small smile forms on my lips.
"I was hoping to keep it a surprise, but there's only so much I can hide in front of the mirror," Catherine says as she catches it. "What do you think so far?"
"It's great," I tell her honestly.
She beams at me. "Just wait until we're done then."
I quickly learn that she's not lying as she blow dries it and the small amount of blonde color that she has added to my natural auburn starts to stand out. I'm already in love with it before she stands in front of me and takes the comb and scissors to the front. When she moves and starts fluffing it out with her fingers, my jaw drops open. She's cut it all the way to my shoulders and given me bangs. I don't know that I would've picked the style out for myself, but I absolutely love it looking at myself in the mirror. I'm so much the same person as I am looking different.
"What do you think?" she asks, watching me in my state of shock and worrying her bottom lip.
"It's amazing," I tell her a little breathlessly. "I love it."
She claps her hands and spins me around to face the room.
"Oh my God, Cat," one of the other girl’s states. "She looks fantastic."
Accepting the other praises, she turns back to me with a bright smile that I can't help but return. "Let's go finish up front."
Pushing some buttons on her touch-screen computer, she prints out a tiny slip of paper and explains the charges to me. I pay her and leave twenty-five dollars in the tip spot. The only reason I know what that is for is because I listened to the other girls when they were leaving and paying. I'm sure that I'm leaving more than I'm supposed to, but I think it's worth it. I should probably leave her more for how good she's made me feel.
After thanking her multiple times, I step back out on the street where the sun is slowly setting, creating beautiful colors in the sky. I debate for a minute or two on whether I want to call it a day and come back out tomorrow so that I'm not walking in the dark back to campus. However, the thought of the mattress flickers across my mind, and I know that I have no choice but to go to the next store and get sheets at the very least.
Hefting my bags up on my shoulder, I take off at a brisk walk toward the store. By the time that I make it there, it's still light out as I go inside. This store is huge and seems to be the place that everyone shops considering it's packed with people. Grabbing a cart at the front, I set my bags down in it, slowly making my way around.
I come across the toy aisles and am amazed that there are so many to choose from. At the compound, the babies and littles are only given things that we've made with our own two hands, which doesn't leave a whole lot of options. In here, there are games and dolls and cars and bikes. Oh, to be a kid out in the world like this and not stuck on the grounds of the compound.
Tears fill my eyes quickly spilling over. I wipe them away angrily, knowing good and well that I can't do anything by myself to save them from it. Moving away from that section as fast as possible, I almost walk right by the pillows and sheets. I have to take a few steps backward to turn my cart into the aisle.
There are a lot of choices here, too, but it doesn't take long to find a cheap set of plain, white sheets with tiny black dogs on them and a thick pillow. Honestly, I think about buying about four of those, but I'd never be able to get them home with me. Which is the same reason that I want to get a couple snack foods, but won't be. I can only carry so much.
I curse it all to hell as I find the sports section. I need a lot more than I thought about needing, and still wouldn't be able to carry it all. Tomorrow is definitely going to bring about another trip out here. It makes me sad, but I leave without getting anything from there. Volleyball is the only reason I was able to escape. I will always be grateful and give it a hundred and ten percent.
My heart lightens some when I come across the soap and shampoo. It takes me an embarrassing amount of time to pick the one that I want. I find myself comparing them all to the goat-milk things that we make and use at the compound. When I come across one that smells exactly the same, there's a forbidden thought of throwing it against the wall. It makes my stomach churn.
Finding a sweet, coconut-scented shampoo and conditioner, I search out a soap that matches close enough and put them all in the cart. As I peruse the aisles, I add a toothbrush and toothpaste. Also, toilet paper and deodorant go in. Typically, we didn't use deodorant, but the sports teams were always an exception. I've always wondered why the people in charge allowed sports at all since it gave us a small amount of freedom into the world. We had compound chaperones, but we still got that glimpse into the real world every time we played away games.
Strolling past the makeup, I don't even stop to look twice at it. I wouldn't know what to do with any of it, even if I wanted to. I do, however, grab a brush, some new hair ties, and a few clips.
Figuring that I have enough to make it until tomorrow, I head back up toward the front, skidding to a stop as I pass towels sitting on the end of an aisle. It may not be a bad idea to make a list for later, because I didn't even think about towels and wash rags. I only take one towel for now and a small pack of four rags before continuing on my mission.
It takes less than ten minutes to check out at the register, the lady ringing me up not even batting an eyelash at my eclectic purchases. Then again, I'm sure she's like everyone else and sees kids like me every single day buying things they need for campus living.
I tell her to have a good night trying to be polite, but she isn't as friendly back. Almost like she's too tired to care. I don't take offense at all, because me, too, girl. Me, too. And I still have to make it all the way back to my dorm carrying all of these bags.
Getting to the front of the store, I pack some of the loose items into my bag on my back. I've got it stuffed as full as the zipper will allow, and resort to carrying the rest, loading my arms up with the rest of the bags. Too bad I can't just borrow the cart. Though, I'd look like a crazy person pushing it through the streets. It's only about a mile or so. I can make it.
I do, too. Halfway down, I come to a fancier restaurant where stylish people are sitting outside eating underneath an awning with little twinkle lights strung around it. The smell is good enough to make my stomach rumble, even though I'm not even that hungry right now. I don't realize that I've stopped to stare until someone whispers behind their hand and the other person at their table turns to look at me. My face heats up, and I quickly start walking again. I'm in such a hurry to get away that I almost run face first into a man coming out of the door that's off to the side.
He's turned facing the door and not paying attention, either, as he chats with whoever is inside. At our almost collision, he reaches out to steady me. "Woah, hey there. Sorry."
I instantly stop dead and take a step back right before his hands can touch me.
Moving his palms up in a defensive pose, he adds, "Sorry about that. I wasn't watching where I was going."
"It's okay," I tell him, trying not to breathe. I'd taken a lungful of his alpha scent and my body doesn't care about stranger danger. It is reacting in a way that I've never had happen, which terrifies me even more.
"You need help getting all of that somewhere?" he asks, motioning to my bags with a genuine smile. I can tell he does that frequently because of the lines on his cheeks when he does it.
I shake my head. "No thank you. I've got it."
"You sure?" he asks with a small dip of his chin and a raise of his eyebrows. "That looks like a lot, and my car is right here."
I don't care how friendly everyone has been today. There's no way in heaven or hell that I'm getting into a car with a stranger. Not just any stranger, but an alpha whose scent is short circuiting my brain.
"I'm okay," I tell him, fighting the urge to step away further.
"Okay," he says. "Well, have a great night."
"You, too," I reply, waiting until he's walking toward the white SUV parked at the curb to start moving again. I don't know why my body reacted to him the way that it did. We have plenty of alphas on the compound, who technically aren't allowed to be alone with us. Some of them break the rules and do it anyway. There's been twice that one of us omegas was pretty much stolen in our sleep. The next day, they're bonded to their kidnapper and their pack and a wedding is being planned. I never got the chance to speak to either of them afterwards, but in the few times that I saw them out, they didn't look as miserable as I thought they would. As I know that I would be.
This alpha is different. His kindness shines through his brown eyes and the way that his smile came so easily. The dark, curly hair on top of his head makes me wish I would've reached out to touch one of the curls to see if they're as soft as they look. He had at least five or six inches on my five foot eight, and broad shoulders to boot. Somehow, I never knew that I found that as attractive as I do. Not to even mention his scent. It reminded me of cooking a pie in the kitchen. Some kind of spice. I just can't put my finger on which one.
This consumes my thoughts all the way back to campus, making the trip feel like it takes less time than it did earlier. Once I get to my dorm, I have to set all my bags down to dig through the one on my back for the keycard to buzz myself in. Then it's a whole other issue trying to keep the door open while I load everything back up in my arms. I finally manage, and once inside, consider taking the elevator since I'm heavily weighted. However, it's just another good step in progression if I hoof it up the flights with the weight. So, that's what I do.
Not going to lie and say I'm not out of breath by the time I make it back to my room, though. Dropping all of the bags on the floor, I collapse backward onto the mattress and stare at the ceiling while I try to slow down my breathing. I can't say for how long I lay there, but it's long enough that I almost fall asleep. For once in what feels like a very long time, my brain is clear, and I don't feel like I have to think of anything. I don't have to have a plan for tomorrow. Only what I want.
A hard sigh leaves my chest before I get up to sort out my things. I hang and fold all the clothes, putting them where they belong in the closet and built in drawers. I then take all of the smaller things out of my bag and place them in the bathroom where they go, stopping to give my teeth a long brushing. Spitting in the sink and rinsing my mouth, I raise back up, catching my reflection in the mirror. I play with the short strands of my new haircut, loving the way the blonde is so subtle underneath, but shines bright when it moves. There are dark, exhaustion circles underneath my blue eyes, but they are well worth it.
My eyes land on the white dress still hanging where I left it, and my heart feels like it stills in my chest. I don't want to look at it anymore. Turning, I snatch it off the towel rack and walk it back into my room. I want to toss in the trash like I did the borrowed clothes earlier, or better yet, set it on fire. But I don't. Feeling to make sure that it's completely dry, I fold it as tight as I possibly can before putting it inside one of the empty bags and tucking it as far back as possible in the bottom drawer in the closet. I don't have enough clothes yet to even need the drawer, so there shouldn't be any reason that I find it by accident.
The last thing I take out are my sheets. I put them on the mattress and the pillowcase on my pillow. Unfortunately, I forgot to get a blanket, but the sheets came with a flat one, so I'll just make do with that tonight until I can get back to the store tomorrow. Not like it's cold in the building anyway, or that I even get cold that often. My body mass may be on the smaller side, especially for a volleyball player, but I'm supremely warm-natured.
Crawling into bed, I tuck the sheet around my body until I'm wrapped up like a burrito. Just as I'm about to fall asleep, a rock of worry settles in my stomach, and I get back up to check all the locks on the doors. Not only do I have the front door locked, but also my door and the one that leads into the bathroom. I sigh in relief, going back to bed and repeating the burrito process and falling asleep instantly.