Chapter 37
THIRTY-SEVEN
JJ
Bray: Just your friendly reminder that she may not be your coach anymore but she’s still the goalie.
Me: What are you going on about?
Bray: The number one rule of hockey: don’t touch the goalie.
Me: Think you got it backwards, Bray. The number one rule of hockey is definitely don’t touch the coach’s daughter.
Smirking, I pocket my phone, focusing on my father.
“Thank you for letting her stay,” my dad says as he follows me to the foyer.
He and Mom suggested they keep Avery for the night, and while I normally refuse to spend a whole night away from her when I’m in Boston and don’t have a game, my father reminded me that it’s important to have a life outside of work and parenthood.
That I need to live a little too. It was similar to the sentiment he made when I told him I was marrying Tabitha.
That I didn’t always have to do the so-called right thing.
That I could be selfish sometimes and still be a good person.
So tonight, I said yes. My hope was that this would be my chance to put it all on the line.
To tell Adeline my plan. And maybe finally take her out on that first date we never got.
But she’s going out with Scott. Again.
My parents offered to pick Avery up, but I didn’t want to be there when Adeline left. It’s always a production. Savannah and Josie and sometimes a camera crew come over to document while she gets ready, asking her to talk about her thoughts about the last date and hopes for the next one.
It’s a lot.
And it’s killing me.
I’d really like to be a dick and beg my mother to shut the damn thing down.
She owns the magazine. She has the power to do it.
I’ve had to fight the urge to rip the pages from the magazine where Adeline talks about how funny Scott is, how sweet he was when they went to the movies, how he held her hand and bought her favorite candy.
Not Twizzlers. She only eats those to make me feel better.
God, Adeline has done far more than anyone should have to in order to make life easier on me. I figure getting out of her way is the least I can do in return.
Now I need a distraction. If I don’t find something to focus on, I’ll lose my mind thinking of her out with him.
“She’s excited. You guys don’t mind keeping her till Tuesday, though? And bringing her to the game?”
Dad laughs. “Mind? Your mother is ecstatic to wear a new jersey. Did you hear they bedazzled jerseys this week at Jolie?”
I frown. “What are you talking about?”
His lips twitch in amusement. “Hanson is out, buddy. Hate to break it to ya, but everyone will be wearing an Addie jersey to the game.”
That makes me unreasonably happy. “Really?”
“Yup. Your mom is going to have Avery help her bedazzle her own tonight so she’ll match all the Langfield women and her Mimi.”
I almost want to stay so I can see that in person. “That’s great,” I say, voice tight.
My father slips his hands into his slacks and rocks back on his heels. “So you, uh, gonna make your move? Or did Beckett scare you off at the football game?”
I cough out a laugh. “I don’t know what you are talking about.”
He stares me down, blue eyes piercing. He’s not buying what I’m selling.
I don’t back down. There is nothing going on. No matter what I wish were happening.
“Listen…” He ducks, shaking his head. When he looks back up at me, his face is a mask of regret.
It’s an emotion I recognize. One I feel all the way to my soul.
“I wasted so much time thinking I was doing the right thing for your mother. Believing I knew what she needed. I stayed away for years, and because of that, I missed out on her pregnancy. I wasn’t there for her or my little girl the day she was born.
I missed out on the first eleven years of Chloe’s life…
” His chest falls with a defeated sigh. “You don’t get that time back.
There’s no rewind. I know she isn’t Avery’s mom, but”—he shakes his head—“she’s the love of your life and she loves your little girl. ”
My heart lodges itself in my throat. “I know that.”
He scowls like he can’t believe I’m aware yet still being so obstinate. “So what are you waiting for?”
“Maybe it’s just too late for us.” I rough a hand over my face, fighting the heat building behind my eyes.
“She’s dating someone else. And I still haven’t resolved this shit show with Tabitha.
Knowing her, it won’t go smoothly even when I finally serve her with divorce papers.
She’s going to try to ruin everything in my life.
It’s what she does. And I don’t want that to touch Adeline. ”
With a heavy sigh, he shakes his head. “Leave Tabitha to me. You—” He blows out an aggravated breath.
“Try chasing your happiness for once, rather than worrying. You’ve been doing it since you were a boy.
Trying to make things easier for everyone else.
And I get it, your mother’s battle with cancer meant you learned a lot earlier than most that life isn’t fair.
But your mom never stopped fighting. So why the hell did you? ”
Your mom never stopped fighting. An hour later I’m still rolling those words around in my head. Why did I give up the fight?
When I get home, the house is quiet. Finn, Winnie, and Hope took the kids out for dinner and a movie.
Finn texted, inviting me along, but I quickly declined. Why would I want to endure the chaos of dinner out with a bunch of kids if my own isn’t even there?
In the silence, I’m wondering if I should have agreed. Or maybe I should drive over to Bray’s and talk him into giving me another tattoo. I’d do just about anything to distract myself from thoughts of Adeline and her goddamn date.
I need a shower. A reset maybe.
I pull my shirt over my head and toss it onto the bed. Then I snag a pair of shorts from the dresser and shuffle to the bathroom.
When I push the door open, I stagger back. Because the room isn’t empty. No, Adeline fucking Langfield is standing at the sink wearing nothing but her jersey.
Jesus, I thought the sight of her in my jersey would be the stuff of fantasies.
But seeing her in hers has me losing all goddamn sense.
Her toned legs are bare, the pale skin mouthwatering.
Immediately, my attention is drawn to the freckle behind her knee I discovered it when we were seventeen and at the beach together for the first time.
Fuck, this woman is my goddamn dream come true and she’s getting ready for a date with someone else.
Will she sleep with him tonight? That thought makes my stomach roll. Will he treasure her? Please her? Treat her the way she deserves to be treated?
I blow out a breath, forcing the thoughts from my head. “Sorry, I thought you’d already left. I’ll use another bathroom.”
“JJ.”
I’m still staring at that freckle when she spins around. The movement is what I need to break from the trance I’m in. I drag my attention up and find myself face to face with her. Beautiful honey eyes, red lips, soft skin.
Her lips twitch. “Two truths and a lie.”
“What?” I tug at my hair, groaning. “I don’t want to play a goddamn game right now, Adeline. I don’t want you to go on this fucking date.”
One side of her mouth hitches in cocky amusement at my spiraling.
It’s sexy as fuck.
She holds up a thumb. “I’m not getting dressed for Scott.” Her index finger. “I actually have no interest in getting dressed at all.” Her middle finger. “I’m not your coach anymore, Hanson.”
The flirtatious, raspy tone pulls at something deep inside me, making it hard to breathe.
“I don’t know which one is the lie.”
Her eyes flare, humor swimming there. “None of them are.”
My heart rate quickens and hope floats right up my throat. “You’re not going out with Scott?”
She shakes her head.
“And you don’t want to get dressed?”
I take a step closer, and of its own volition, my hand reaches for her jersey. I tug her closer and grasp her waist.
When she doesn’t pull back, relief cascades through me.
“Nope,” she says, voice soft, pupils dilated.
I swallow audibly. “And you’re not my coach anymore.”
She grins, her tongue peeking out. “No, I’m not.”
“Fuck, Adeline. Tell me to stop, because I’m one breath away from fucking you against this door.”
She bites down on her bottom lip. “There’s a perfectly good bed in either of our rooms.”
That’s all it takes to break me. My mouth crashes against hers and it’s like I’ve finally been set free.
Her lips are soft, but her whimpers are loud and unapologetic.
Her fingers dig into every inch of me she can find.
She scratches at my bare chest, the moan escaping her enough to make my head spin.
I cup her cheeks and hold her still for a second. “Addie, baby.”
She smiles. “Thought you only called me Adeline.”
I lick her lips and her eyes roll back. “Shut up for two fucking seconds, please.”
The sound of the giggle she lets out goes right to my goddamn dick. Fuck, I love this woman. And I want her more than anything, but I need to know this is more than a hookup. More than her scratching an itch.
“Adeline, I’m hanging on by a thread here.”
Smile softening, she reads me like only she can. “I’m yours, JJ. Call me whatever the fuck you want, just know: I’m yours.”
That’s all I fucking need to hear. Our mouths fuse together again, and this time I’m the one desperate to touch every inch of her body. I slip a hand beneath the jersey, and when I find nothing but skin, I hiss. “Adeline fucking Langfield, you aren’t wearing any panties.”
She grins against my mouth. “Seemed pointless.”
With my face lifted to the sky, I groan, and in French, I praise the heavens above for her perfection.
“Tu es mon paradis,” she whispers back to me. You are my heaven.
I smile at her words. At the way she learned French because of me. For me. I was so fucking foolish, not realizing what I had all along. Not seeing that I could never get over her.
Grasping her ass, I pick her up. Then I carry her into my room.