Chapter 16
Leo
Sitting on the couch, I watch as the party unfolds around me. There’s an excitement buzzing in the air, and it’s hard to tell where exactly it’s coming from.
I’ve been a tornado of emotions the last couple of days. After Nash and I had sex in the hotel, I thought things would change. However, the next morning, Nash woke up almost frantic.
It was obvious he regretted what we had done. The alcohol and lust mixed had proven to be a terrible combination. I couldn’t let him know that his words had broken me. My heart had shattered into a million pieces.
I wanted to break things off with Nash. It would be easy to find someone else to share a bed with, but for some reason, I couldn’t find the motivation to tell him we had to stop.
Every time I saw his face, I crumbled.
We’ve kissed, touched, and had playful moments.
I want to ask him what we are, but I don’t know how.
Tonight I had wanted to talk to him about it, but the guys ruined that for me.
“Hey, you good?” Marcus asks, as he sits down next to me.
“Yeah, I’m just tired,” I tell him.
“I wanted to tell you that I like the changes I see,” he begins, taking a swig of his beer.
I look at him, waiting for him to go on.
“We were all a little nervous when you arrived on the team. And after you and Nash collided, I thought this was going to be a rough season. But it looks like you guys have finally figured out your shit.”
I nod, secretly wanting to tell him the truth, but knowing it can never come out. “Yeah, we just had to work through some things.”
Marcus is like everyone’s older brother. He’s the team captain, but he’s more than that.
“Well, I’m glad. I think our team is going to go far,” he says.
We talk for a few more minutes before he gets pulled back into the party.
***
The next day, I find myself walking down the street. I pass by a large billboard with my name and shirtless body on display. It’s an advertisement for a car dealership. They offered me a great deal on a mustang.
I need some coffee, and there is a new coffee shop just a block away from my apartment. I walk inside, indie rock softly playing overhead. The barista welcomes me, and I can tell that she recognizes me. The team PR company has plastered the team's faces all over the city, and we have amazing fans.
“Hi, what can I get you?” she asks.
I ordered a large cappuccino and then found a seat in the back. I need to call my accountant and have him send the monthly check to the charities I select.
As I’m on my phone, I hear a familiar voice. Glancing up, I see Nash and Talia ordering coffee. At first, I try to sink into my chair. Maybe they won’t see me.
Why the hell am I hiding?
To my horror, Talia sees me first.
“Hey, Leo,” she calls out.
I wave, knowing I can’t ignore them.
They get their drinks, and Talia practically drags Nash over to my table. “Can we sit with you?” she asks, already pulling out a chair.
I chuckle, knowing I can’t say no.
Nash eyes me but then looks down at his drink.
“What are you up to?” Talia asks, breaking the tension.
Nash has told me a little bit about Am, and I can totally see her personality shining through. She’s exactly as Nash described her. I kind of like her.
“I didn’t have any coffee, and my assistant hasn’t gone to the grocery store this week. Plus, I had to make some calls,” I explain.
Nash nods along, but Talia is the one who keeps the conversation flowing. My phone is sitting on the table, screen up, and her eyes wander over the words. “Are you looking at foster homes?” she asks.
This time, I laugh loudly, and I see Nash nudge her arm.
“Talia, you are so rude,” he scoffs.
“It’s fine. No, I’m not looking at foster homes. I send monthly checks to local foster homes here in town and to the foster agency that took care of me back home in New York,” I tell them.
“Wow, that’s amazing.” Nash looks at me with a spark in his eyes.
“I bet the PR team loves that. What a great way to help your image,” Talia admires.
Shaking my head, I wave off her statement. “No, I don’t talk about this to anyone. It’s kind of private.”
“Why keep it a secret? The press would love it,” Nash questions.
I’ve told him about my past. Opened up to him in ways I never have with anyone else, but I never shared this.
“I haven’t done a lot of good in my life. The few things I have, I want to keep it private. Once the world knows, it won’t just be mine anymore.” My words ring true.
Talia smiles and sighs while Nash nods in understanding.
I could reinvent myself and let the world know about my good deeds, but I refuse to use this one thing just to improve my image.
We sit and chat for a bit longer, and then Talia announces that they need to get to the movie they are going to see. Part of me wishes that I could go, too. But I know that would be too risky.
Whatever Nash and I are doing has to stay out of the public eye. I will just have to dream about a life where Nash and I can be together in public.