Chapter 24
Blake and I were quiet on the drive back to Birch Tree Farm.
I knew we were both thinking over the visit to his family.
We stopped off to pick up the shrubs Dylan had ordered from the garden centre and while we were there, I spotted white watering cans that looked pretty.
After messaging to see what Willow thought, I bought five to dot around the picnic area we were making that I’d fill with flowers.
I would need to go back to see Mary at her florist’s in town and that thought excited me.
When we passed the sign welcoming us to Birchbrook, the sun was dipping in the sky, calling an end to what had been a long and emotional day.
‘Are you okay?’ Blake asked as we drove towards the farm.
‘For the first time in a while, I think maybe I will be,’ I replied. ‘You?’
‘I feel the same. We’re both seeing Sarah and Henry tomorrow, though…’
‘Things can’t stay like they are,’ I said, already dreading spending time alone with Henry.
We drove through the gate and Blake parked outside the farmhouse.
‘I think I might go and work on my arch for a bit,’ I said, not really wanting to chit-chat with Willow, Adam and Dylan just yet.
Plus, the more time I spent with Blake, the more the charged tension between us became almost unbearable.
We both wanted to kiss but both knew we shouldn’t.
I wanted to get away from the temptation.
I needed some alone time. ‘I’ll see you tomorrow.
’ I jumped out of the car and walked out to the strawberry fields.
I went to the barn and picked up the remaining flowers I had left there and carried them and the watering cans out to the fields.
I had to make two trips but I didn’t mind the walking after so long sat in the car.
I lifted off the tarpaulin covering my arch and then carried on wrapping faux flowers around it.
I had forgotten how healing it was to work with my hands and be outside.
My mind started to clear as I focused on what I was doing.
I weaved flowers through the metal arch and tried not to think about what had happened since I’d come to Birch Tree Farm.
Instead, I wanted to just enjoy this task.
Maybe my mum had used her work with flowers to clear her mind too.
I wished I could ask her but it was enough that I felt her presence with me out here.
The light began to fade then so I paused and looked at what I’d done. I stepped back to look at the finished arc. The colourful flowers mixed with eucalyptus draped around the frame gave me a burst of pride.
I heard footsteps behind me but I kept on staring at the arch. I hadn’t had such a sense of satisfaction with anything that I had done for a long time. This felt like a big moment somehow.
‘Hi, I’m just taking Maple on her last walk of the day,’ Willow called out as they approached. ‘Blake said you were out here. It’s almost dark; you going to stop now?’
‘It’s done.’
‘What? Oh my God!’ Willow hurried to stand beside me and wrapped her arm through mine. ‘It’s so pretty, Daisy. Thank you. God, I didn’t think we’d get to spend this summer together or that you would help me with all this. I feel really lucky. You saved me!’
I laid my head on her shoulder. ‘I’m the lucky one; you’ve saved me.’ I took a deep breath. My mind hadn’t been this clear for a very long time. I turned to my cousin. ‘I want to stay here for the rest of the summer. Would that be okay?’
Willow smiled. ‘Well, of course it would! Hell, you can stay forever if you want. We’ve missed you.
It’s so nice to have you back. And I was panicking about not having my usual summer help around and making sure I keep building on the success of the pumpkin patch, plus stop my dad from doing too much… You arriving was perfect.’
‘That’s how I feel too. I am loving being here. I feel more like myself. I’m not so scared about the future either. I want to do what my uncle said: follow my heart.’
‘What’s it saying?’ she asked me.
‘That I should stay for the summer so I can help you get it ready for the opening then I can watch people enjoy this farm as much as I do. I want to eat strawberries and have a picnic and keep watching the stars. And I’d like to spend time with Mary in her flower shop,’ I said, smiling as I thought of things I wanted to do.
Then my smile faded. ‘I don’t want to go back with Henry.
I just don’t know how to tell him so he will listen.
And I’m still scared about walking away from him and his family into the… unknown.’
‘But is the unknown scarier than living the life he wants for you both? The one you don’t want?’
She knew. Willow knew me so well, she could see I didn’t want what Henry was offering me.
‘You’re right,’ I replied softly.
‘Then you’ll tell him. You’ll find the right words. And he will listen because he will realise this is what you want.’
‘How do you and Blake have so much faith in me?’ I burst out, wondering why they both thought I could do this when I was so unsure.
Willow put her arm over my shoulders and gave me a squeeze.
‘I remember after my mum’s funeral, we both came out of the farmhouse, leaving the wake for a bit.
We walked over there,’ she said, pointing to where the strawberries started.
‘We sat down and I asked you how I would ever be able to manage life without my mum. And I asked how you’d been managing without your parents. ’
I thought back, remembering that night. The pain in her eyes. The way her voice had caught in sadness. The way we looked at one another, grief washing over us both. The loss we both felt for ourselves, and for each other.
‘You told me that my mum would want me to live. That all she wanted was for me to be happy. And we could both be sad that we didn’t have the people we loved the most in our lives any more but we couldn’t let that sadness stop us from living.
It was the last thing they would ever want.
You were so inspiring. You believed in what you told me.
And even though you’ve struggled to do that…
we both have… you were right that night.
My mum, your parents, they would want us to live. ’
‘But then I walked away and left you.’
‘We had to deal with it all in our own ways. It took me a long time to start living again fully. It was when my dad handed me a letter from Dylan’s brother’s business offering to buy this farm.
That shook me out of not living. And it took standing in front of a mirror in your wedding dress to shake you out of it.
But it worked. You came back. This summer, you start living. ’
‘I kissed Blake,’ I confessed then. ‘I have no idea what it means. It made me feel alive, though.’
She smiled. ‘Keep doing things that make you feel alive. That’s what both our parents would want. Deal, cousin?’
I nodded through my watering eyes. ‘Deal.’
* * *
The following morning, I nervously got ready to see Henry. It was one thing to tell Willow what I wanted, another to tell Henry what was in my heart.
Henry had messaged me to wear something smart so I assumed we were going somewhere fancy. I put on one of my new floral dresses with a cardigan over my shoulders, sandals and my new daisy hair clip pulling back one side of my bob, then I went outside to wait for Henry to drive onto the farm.
Blake came over wearing city shorts and a polo shirt, his hair tousled and still damp from his morning shower.
‘I saw the flower arch after I bought the ponies out of the barn,’ he said.
‘It’s perfect, Daisy.’ Then he smiled, giving me the full dimple treatment.
‘Also, you look lovely. Is that okay to say?’
‘Thank you,’ I said, a faint blush appearing on my cheeks. Then my smile faded. ‘I’m really nervous.’
‘Yeah?’
I longed to tell him that I didn’t want Henry. But what if I chickened out again? ‘Are you going to see Sarah?’ I asked, wishing we could spend another day together instead.
‘I said I’d go and see her at the pub. I guess we both need to make some decisions, huh?’
Then a car pulled into the farm but it wasn’t Henry. Willow came out of the farmhouse so Blake said he’d see me later and went back to his cottage. Willow and I watched as her best friend Sabrina parked in the driveway and jumped out.
‘I have the signs for the trail!’ she cried excitedly as she climbed out.
‘Already? Amazing!’ Willow called back.
We went over to her car. ‘It’s so great to see you again!
’ Sabrina gave me a warm smile and pulled me into her.
Her blonde hair looked like it was dancing on the light breeze.
She was still petite and pretty as she had been when we were kids.
She was a teacher at the local school, married, with a little girl, and she looked completely happy with her life.
‘You too. Wow, these are so good,’ I said as I looked at the signs Willow began lifting out of Sabrina’s car boot.
She’d made wooden signs with Strawberry Fields Trail written on it in white with red strawberries painted around the border.
She’d also made one in the shape of an arrow to show the way people should walk down the trail.
‘Are they okay?’ Sabrina asked as she lifted another one out.
‘They are so cute!’ Willow cried. ‘Thank you. They might even top your pumpkin signs. We can put one by the front gate and the arrow at the start of the trail then this one at the strawberry fields’ finale.’
‘I can’t wait to see what you’ve been doing while I was away for a few days,’ Sabrina said. ‘I’ve heard all about your flower arch, Daisy.’
‘Come and see it,’ Willow said. ‘Daisy is off out but I’ve got time for a coffee?’
‘Sounds good,’ Sabrina said. She eyed the signs. ‘You know, one day I’d love to make a Christmas one…’ Her eyes twinkled.
‘Don’t give Willow any more ideas,’ Dylan said from behind us.
We all jumped.
‘We have so many things going on as it is!’ His eyes were wide as he shook his head.
‘Sorry, Dylan,’ Sabrina said hastily.
‘You wanted to take over the Airbnb business,’ Willow reminded him. ‘It’s not just me who keeps coming up with more ideas. Something festive around here could be fun one day, though…’ She seemed to go into a dreamlike trance.
‘Let’s go and look at what you’ve all been doing,’ Sabrina said with a laugh.
‘I’m off to meet with a supplier,’ Dylan said, going to his car.
‘Henry will be here in a minute,’ I said, my nerves growing.
‘Good luck,’ Willow said as she and Sabrina both hugged me goodbye and then headed for the strawberry fields. Then I saw Henry turning into the farm.
He beeped the horn so I went over to his car and climbed in beside him.
‘Hi,’ I said, feeling no joy at seeing him again.
Henry leaned over to kiss my cheek and then his eyes lingered on my dress. ‘Oh, I thought I said to dress smart for lunch,’ he said.
I stared at him. When we used to go to his country club, I would wear clingy dresses that he loved but I hated.
I thought back to how he would make comments about my appearance, and I would end up going to change until my outfit met with his approval.
I don’t know why I ever thought that I should do so.
‘If you want me to come for lunch then this is how I will be coming,’ I replied shortly.
Henry put his hands up. ‘No need to get snippy. Let’s go.’
I put my seatbelt on and watched the farm fade away, wishing I hadn’t got into the car.
‘I finished my flower arch,’ I said, thinking that I should try to make conversation.
‘What flower arch?’ Henry said as he put the satnav on to direct us to the restaurant. ‘Oh, God, you remember that client last year who…’
Henry was off then talking about work as he so often did, not at all interested in what I had been doing. This wasn’t what I wanted from a partner. I’d ignored it for too long.
We got through the journey and pulled into the car park of a beautiful hotel nestled in the countryside.
‘I have a surprise for you,’ Henry said as he parked, a grin on his face.
My stomach instantly plummeted.