15. Running Away Is Bad
RUNNING AWAY IS BAD
ANNELISA
My phone vibrates on the bedside table, and I put my book down while I reach for it. I’d been struggling to concentrate anyway, so it’s a welcome distraction.
When I see the name on the screen, I swallow hard. After weeks of silence, I’d begun to think I’d never hear from Will again.
Apprehensive, I drag my finger across the bubble with his name on it and unlock the phone.
Will
Hey, how’s it going?
I stare at the phone for a long time. Has he been drinking? It’s pretty late on a Saturday night for a random text. But I also know that this isn’t a booty call text message. Seven years is a long time, but I doubt Will has changed that much that he’s into self-sabotage.
After silently debating what to do for a few minutes, I start typing.
Annelisa
Hey. It’s going okay. It’s good to hear from you.
I let out a breath when I hit send. A part of me is so happy to hear from him.
The part that I’ve been silencing for years, afraid to admit to myself how much I miss him and the life we had together.
The other part of me, though? The part that tells me I don’t deserve to have him back in my life? It’s pretty damn loud right now.
Refusing to become that person who stares at their phone waiting for a reply, I take my phone into the office and plug it into the charger in there. Figuring it’s better to have the phone out of arm’s reach in case I do something stupid.
Like call him.
I go back to bed and open my book back up, making it through a few pages before accepting I haven’t paid attention to a single word.
Slamming it shut, I turn off the light and stare up at the ceiling, praying sleep will eventually claim me.
But it’s a long time before the memories fade and I know I’m kidding myself if I thought I’d put the past behind me.
After another week where I’ve spent far too long staring at a blank page waiting to for the words to come, on Friday night I ring the doorbell of the house I honestly hadn’t expected to return to after the last time I was here.
I stifle a laugh when I hear voices on the other side of the door.
“Pull your pants up, Lucy! Stop dancing around with your pants around your ankles and flush the toilet!” Morgan yells, her voice growing louder as she gets closer to the door.
I hear a muffled reply as she opens the door, and she yells over her shoulder, “Because I said so!” before turning back to look at me, rolling her eyes. “I never thought I’d see the day where I would be constantly reminding another human not to run around the house naked,” she says with a sigh.
I laugh and hold out the large tub of gelato I’d brought with me.
She takes it from me with a smile. “Oh, you are going to win some pretty big Aunty points with this.”
I nod. “Yes, that is the goal.”
Morgan steps aside to let me in, before leading me into the kitchen where she puts the gelato in the freezer. “Best to hide that until after dinner, otherwise Lucy will be driving us nuts asking for it every two seconds.”
I nod. “Good idea.” I pull the bottle of her favourite wine out from behind my back, and her eyes light up while I put it on the bench.
I spy Caidin sitting quietly in her playpen in the corner, cuddling a stuffed dinosaur while she drinks water from a sippy cup.
Morgan rests a hip against the bench while she fixes me with a hopeful look.
“So, Chris is working late tonight at the Byron office. My plan is, feed the tiny humans and get them into bed. Then you and I get pizza and have that bottle of wine on the couch while we binge Buffy, just like the good old days. How does that sound?”
I smile. “God yes, I haven’t watched Buffy in years! That sounds like an amazing plan!”
Although we were too young to watch it when it was on television, it was a favourite show of both of ours when we were in high school, and we’d almost worn out my mum’s DVD’s.
“Great! I promised Lucy she could watch two more episodes of Bluey before she has dinner, so I’m just reheating some pasta for her.”
We chat for a few minutes while the pasta is in the microwave, and we’re soon joined by Lucy, who dutifully informs Morgan that her two episodes are done .
“Good girl, honey. You sit down next to Aunty Annelisa and have your dinner.”
Lucy regards me closely for a moment before climbing up onto the stool beside me. “If you’re my Aunty, how come I’ve never met you before?” she asks through a mouthful of pasta.
I smile, bemused, and glance over at Morgan.
She shrugs. “She might only be five, but she’s pretty switched on. Aren’t you, Bub?” She ruffles Lucy’s hair before rounding the bench to lift Caidin out of her play pen.
She deposits the tiny tot into her highchair and takes a seat in front of her with a bowl of unappetising looking mush.
I turn back to Lucy. “That’s right, you haven’t met me before. I was away for a long time.”
The little girl cocks her head to the side while she chews her next bite.
“My daddy said you ran away somewhere. Mummy says running away is bad. She always yells at me when I run away from her.”
I choke on a laugh while Morgan smacks a hand to her forehead. “Out of the mouths of babes. Sorry. She must have heard Chris and I talking the other day.”
I wave my hand. “It’s okay, Brandie is the same. I’m used to the honesty of tiny humans.” I turn back to Lucy. “Your daddy was right, Lucy. I did run away. And that was naughty. I came back though.”
Lucy continues to watch me closely while she chews, like she’s reserving judgement for a later date.
Thankfully, that is the end of the interrogation.
Morgan and I continue to chat while she feeds Caidin, before the little girl cracks it and snatches the spoon from her hand with a high-pitched squeal, determined to feed herself.
She plunges the spoon into the bowl, splattering food all over the tray table in front of her.
Morgan and I both laugh while she clumsily attempts to shove the half empty spoon into her mouth .
Morgan shakes her head with a sigh. “It’s just best if I don’t look.”
I grin and open my mouth to respond, but her phone rings, vibrating across the kitchen bench. She gets up to check.
“Oh, it’s Mum. You okay if I take this?”
I wave my hand. “Of course, don’t worry about me.”
Morgan steps out of the room to take the call, and I continue to watch the expressive artwork that is Caidin feeding herself. After a moment, Morgan rushes back into the room, looking flustered.
“Mum is on the way to the hospital with Dad. They had to get an ambulance out as he started having chest pains. I need to get up there, but Chris won’t be back for a few hours, and Bri and Jake aren’t in town this weekend.” I can tell she’s struggling to hold back tears, and I jump to my feet.
“Go, hon. I can take care of the girls.” I’m not entirely sure that I can, but I know Morgan needs to feel like I’ve got it under control.
And honestly, how hard can it be?
Morgan bites her lip, looking between me and Lucy. “Are you sure?”
“Seriously, M, go. I got this sorted. You need to go be with your parents, and you can’t take the girls to the hospital. Who knows how long you’re going to be there. I can hold down the fort until Chris gets home.”
After another moment of hesitation, she nods before moving closer to Lucy. “Baby, Aunty Annelisa is going to put you and Caidin to bed, okay? Mummy just has to go check on Grandad.”
Lucy flicks an uneasy look my way before nodding slowly. “Okay Mummy. Why do you need to see Grandad?”
Morgan pushes a strand of hair behind her daughter’s ear. “He’s just a little bit sick, honey. So I have to help Grandma. But Aunty Annelisa will take good care of you, okay? ”
Lucy nods her head again, returning her attention to her pasta. Morgan gathers things together, moving around the kitchen quickly.
“I’ll grab their pyjamas and leave them on their beds. Caidin normally gets a breast feed before bed, but I’ll get some formula sorted, because I didn’t pump today.”
Morgan whirls around the house for another ten minutes, leaving me with an endless list of instructions that I hope I’ll remember, before racing off to the hospital.
“Right,” I say, clapping my hands while Lucy stares up at me. “How about some ice cream?”
I’ve obviously said the magic words, because Lucy bounces up and down in her chair, nodding wildly.
I do my best to make it seem like everything is fine.
I know Morgan is fairly close to her dad these days, and I send a silent prayer out into the universe that he’ll be okay.
Most of my childhood memories include Morgan and her family, and it would be heartbreaking if something happened.
I spoon the ice cream out for Lucy, who starts gobbling it down much faster than she ate her pasta. I grab a dishcloth and start cleaning up after Caidin, who is covered in pureed vegetables and is happily spreading it all over the highchair tray, oblivious to everything going on around her.
I survey the two girls, wondering how I’ll be getting them both to bed. I’m used to managing Brandie solo, but there’s only one of her.
Deciding to get Lucy sorted first, I know I can’t leave the little girl alone in the bath, so I put Caidin back in the playpen before moving the highchair to the bathroom door.
I figure I need to keep the infant contained while I deal with her older sister and guess that the highchair will be the easiest option, because I can keep her strapped in.
After a few minutes, I get Lucy settled with her toys in the bathtub just as Caidin starts to fuss in the chair, straining against the straps holding her in place. I move to get her out, but the doorbell rings, and I curse under my breath.
I glance from one child to the other, trying to work out what to do.
But I freeze when I hear the front door opening and a very familiar voice call out, “Annie?”