Chapter 47
—Reed—
I barely lasted half an hour before I fell asleep with Kasey wrapped in my arms, and I barely roused when she clicked the TV off and tucked against me.
Heaven had officially occurred on Earth. It took me back to the good days where the only care in the world was her and I—when everything else seemed inconsequential and infinitely less important.
So when Posie stirred in the early hours of the morning, it took me a hot minute to wake fully and get back to reality. It hit harder when I reached for Kasey only to find the bed empty and cold. As I stumbled from bed trying to shake the exhaustion from my bones, I questioned if she’d been with me at all last night. Her visit now seemed conjured by fantasy.
I paused outside Posie’s door, noting that it wasn’t how I left it. Half-expecting to find Kasey in the room, I rushed forth, only to be punched by another bout of crippling panic. In my daze, I could hear Posie fussing but couldn’t find her. As I bolted into the hallway and ran to the lounge, her griping got louder, and I faltered when I found Kasey silhouetted in the moonlight that streamed through the large windows that overlooked the lake.
She seemed to not hear me approach and quietly shushed Posie by gently jiggling her up and down in her arms.
My heart remained in my throat as I came to her side. “She’s hungry, babe.”
Kasey’s tear-stricken face turned my way. “She’s really mine?”
“She really is, babe,” I whispered, smoothing the backs of my fingers over her cheekbones, casting away the moisture. “Isn’t she beautiful?”
Kase nodded as her expression crumbled. Fuck, my chest ached as each sob hit me square and center.
“Here, let me feed her, then I’ll make you a drink too.”
Kasey held Posie tighter when I tried to lift our daughter from her arms, so I changed tact.
“Sit on the couch, darlin’. I’ll fix her bottle, and you can feed her, if you want?”
Still sobbing with tears freely running down her cheeks, Kasey gave a small nod and shuffled to the couch. Satisfied Posie was safe with Kasey nestled into the couch cushions, I rubbed at my chest as I entered the kitchen and hurriedly made the bottle—hearing Posie’s cries escalate from fussing to feed me this instant.
Kasey looked up at me when I returned to her side, eyes begging for help and advice.
“Lie her down a little, babe. She’ll drink as soon as she feels it on her lips.”
A little gasp came from Kase when Posie thrashed her head from side-to-side, then furiously drank as soon as she got suction on the bottle teat.
“Holy crap, she’s a savage,” Kasey whispered.
I snickered and sat close on the couch. “That comes from you.”
She went to protest but snapped her mouth shut. “Actually, I can’t argue. I know I’m a lot.”
“You’re just the right amount,” I murmured, drying her cheeks with my thumb. “It’s one of the things that drew me to you that morning I came into work to find you in the cells. From that moment, I knew you’d be trouble, and I absolutely love it.” I tucked a wayward strand of hair behind her ear and snickered. “Life would be too dull without you.”
She smiled and turned her attention back to Posie sleepily drinking in her arms. I noticed tension creeping into Kasey’s shoulders, and she visibly put space between her and our daughter.
I knew what she was going to say before her eyes found mine through the shadows. “Can you take her now?”
I wouldn’t deny that my heart dropped, and disappointment filled my chest. Kase had progressed in leaps and bounds this weekend, so there had to be a breaking point at some stage. I didn’t want to think of the worst-case scenario—of having to choose between them—because I knew in my heart-of-hearts that I couldn’t abandon my own flesh and blood. I prayed it wouldn’t come to that; that I could have both my girls without my hand being forced.
When Posie finished the bottle, I propped her over my shoulder to burp.
Kasey then stood. “I’m going to head back to Simone’s now.”
“You can stay, Kase. It’s late,” I whispered. “And it doesn’t have to be in my bed. I can set you up in the spare room if you’d prefer?”
“No, it’s okay. I’ve already asked her to pick me up on her way home from work, which is any minute now.” She flicked her hands up and down over her chest. “I just need a little space. It’s a bit—”
“It’s okay, darlin’. I get it. Let me walk you out.”
Relief washed through her stance, and her voice came soft. “Thank you. I don’t want you to think I’m being ungrateful…”
“Baby steps,” I concluded, rising to my feet while cupping Posie’s little bottom in one hand.
We crossed the living room in silence, then paused at the front door. I gazed down at the woman who stole my heart. “Will I see you tomorrow?”
Honesty stared back. “Probably not.”
While disappointed, I appreciated the truth. I smiled and cupped her cheek. “Thank you. For everything.”
For the date. For turning up unannounced. For trying with Posie and letting me hold you in my arms. For the authenticity. The new memories. Simply allowing me to touch you.
I said it all through the gentle caress of my thumb grazing across her cheekbone, holding my breath when she leaned into my palm. My lips met her temple and lingered in a kiss that I never wanted to break.
“I love you, Kase.”
I felt her smile against my hand. That in itself was enough.
“Thank you for this weekend, Reed.”
“There’ll be more. Many more.”
The smile that lit the night pulled her lips wide. “I look forward to it.”
Said smile let out a laugh when Posie belched.
My eyes widened when I felt a warm trail running down my bare back. I twisted at the waist and looked at Kase over my shoulder. “Uh, did she just vomit on me?”
Giggling filled the entry way, bouncing off the tiles and glass. “She totally did. And that’s my cue to leave.”
“Can you wipe it off first?”
Kasey petted my clean shoulder. “Have fun with that.”
“C’mon, babe. Help me out here.”
“Sorry, I’m out. I think I hear Simone.”
I cursed despite laughing, feeling the trail of cooling spilled milk trickling down my lats. “C’mon, Kase! Just wipe it.”
She pulled the door open and gave me a departing grin. “Catch you ’round, DILF.”
I managed to snag her T-shirt and haul her back in for one last fleeting kiss. “And when I do, there’s gonna be hell to pay. I’m coming for you in Denver, Kasey.”
Her trailing laughter danced across the two AM shadows, leaving my heart full yet achingly empty.