Chapter 48
—Kasey—
The journey home to Denver was filled with confronting and conflicting emotions. God, I was lucky to have the love and support of everyone around me, but I hated feeling like a burden. Without Mom and Dad, Simone, and now Reed, I’d be lost, just like my memories. The only one to date that firmly remained was incited by Reed flipping me off. While I had no recollection of loving Reed the first time, with all the little moments I’d spent with him recently, I felt my heart softening... and perhaps even falling a little.
And Posie was... Posie was mine.
While unvoiced, the words were foreign and clunky, filled with disbelief and still underlying denial. There was still so much I needed to learn about her, but I found myself thinking about her and wanting to help, even if it did scare the hell out of me. Her weight was comforting in my arms last night. Her crying had awoken something foreign within me, creating a shift I couldn’t explain. It took me from being cautious and distant to holding her a little tighter and letting the first hints of newfound love germinate. Until fear took control, then I couldn’t offload her fast enough to Reed.
I swallowed, trying to ease the squeeze in my throat. The residual ghosts of last night still stood on my chest and weighed it down.
Stabbing the little blue arrow to send my message to Reed created a wash of butterflies in my stomach. We’d been texting for a while this evening, but I still nibbled my lower lip as I waited for his reply.
Instead of receiving a text, the ringtone brought the phone to life in my hands. I fumbled it while hissing, “Shit, shit, shit!”
I hastily finger-combed my hair and reached for my lip gloss on the bedside cabinet. Ten rings must have passed before Reed gave up. His text arrived soon after.
The Pisser: Hey babe, give me a thumbs up when you want me to call back. I want to talk about my plans to visit you soon.
I typed Here now, then second-guessed sending it right away. Maybe I could delay him. Twenty minutes or so, just until my racing heart had calmed. Intending to tap the backspace button, my thumb had other ideas.
It hit the little send arrow, sending me into a panic when Reed immediately called again.
I couldn’t ghost him twice. Not when I’d just told him I was available.
With my erratic pulse partially closing off my throat, I reluctantly touched the green accept button on the video call while hoping I didn’t look like the flustered mess I was.
~
I released a shaky exhale while rolling my shoulders and wringing my hands. Holy crap I was nervous about seeing Reed and Posie again. It was a complete seven days since our video call, and I’d spent the week torn between walking on air and being wracked with nerves.
I found myself standing in the corporate-like terminal of a private airstrip only used by the rich and famous. The Gatlin family’s jet touched down and taxied toward the terminal building. The closer it got, the higher my nerves climbed.
It only took a couple of short minutes for the jet to park and the door to flip down, then a further agonizing minute before Reed appeared at the top of the steps—dark aviators shading his eyes from the sun’s glare, navy blue baby bag slung over one shoulder and Posie securely tucked into the other. As he carefully picked his way down the steps, my heart raced and stuttered at the sight of him.
As soon as he entered the terminal, a wide smile split his face, and I knew that he’d spotted me lingering at the fringes of the bar. He whipped off his aviators, revealing the dark-brown eyes I adored.
A wash of his yummy cologne came as he wrapped me in a loving hug, squishing Posie between us. “Hi, babe. How are you?”
“Good. How are you?” I inwardly cringed at my lack of conversational zest.
He grinned. “Better now.”
I picked up on the undertones of “not-doing-so-great” and asked about it.
Reed puffed out a sigh and adjusted Posie in his hold. “I mean, it’ll be great to get a bit of normality back, but I’m dreading leaving Posie.”
“Who will be looking after her?”
“Mom’s friend, who’s a family friend, called Connie.”
Concerned, I put my hand on his forearm and tried to ignore the warmth from his skin seeping into my palm. “Is Connie not nice?”
A caring smile graced his mouth. “Connie is the sweetest old lady you’d ever meet. But it’s the fact that I have to leave her in the first place that guts me.”
A spear of guilt shot through my chest. Through many conversations with my counselor, I understood that it was normal to not process emotional connections after a traumatic event. Even so, the self-reproach was real.
“But it’s the best feeling seeing the smile on her little face when I come home at the end of my shift,” Reed continued, pure joy now lighting his weary features. “It’s the best part of my day. Equal only with you.”
He flashed his wide grin, making me grin, then duck my head to hide the blush on my cheeks. While I used to be a take life by the balls type of girl, our history and my lack of memory of it made me crazy insecure at times. Today was one of those days where the awkwardness continuously gnawed.
Reed switched gears to pull me out of the funk. “I bet your parents are hella excited about this weekend. Where are they?” He craned his neck while glancing around the terminal.
“At home.”
His rich-brown eyes immediately flicked to me and narrowed. “You didn’t drive yourself here, did you?”
I met his stare and paused. It held me for ransom while delving into the depths of my soul. Even if I wanted to look away, I couldn’t. Not until a woman appeared at our side and spoke.
“Excuse me, sir, your luggage is available now.” She then turned to me. “Shall we load the case into your car, then bring it around for you, ma’am?”
Reed side-eyed me and adjusted Posie on his hip while I addressed the woman.
“Yes please. That would be great.”
“Perfect,” she replied with a small bow. “Two minutes.”
As she hurried away, I smiled at Reed. “Can I help with anything?” I asked, eyeing the baby apparel plus the actual baby.
“Yes please, babe. When the car pulls up, can you hold Posie while I install her baby seat?”
“Uhhhh, I’m not sure that’s a good idea…” What if I dropped her?
“Sure it is.” His warm hand on the small of my back gently guided me toward the exit.
Hoping he’d forgotten his previous question, I internally cursed when he asked again, “Darlin’, did you drive here?”
I looked his square in the eyes. “Yeah, I did.”
“Have you been medically cleared already?”
Fuck. That was a big-ass no. “Almost.”
Reed frowned down at me. “I call bullshit.”
“It’s not as if I live my life confined to rules, Reed.”
He chuckled and gave me a wry look from under his brows. “I’d be surprised if you started now, darlin’.”
I expected a lecture, instead, he shook his head with a small smile, then gestured for me to exit the terminal before him.
“Alright, babe. Here you go,” he said, holding Posie out like a tribute.
I hesitated again, and he laughed. “She doesn’t bite, darlin’.”
“Haa-haa,” I sassed while awkwardly taking her.
I held her against my chest as if my life depended on it, all while internally chanting for Reed to hurry the fuck up and install the damn baby seat already.
“You’re stalling!” I exclaimed.
Bent over and wrestling with the rear seatbelt, Reed paused and glared over his broad shoulder at me. “I’m not! I’m doing it properly. I’m driving too, by the way.”
That got my hackles up, and I had to dull my sassy retort thanks to Posie. “This is my hometown, and I know the streets.”
“And I’ve seen your driving. For that reason alone, I’ll be driving.”
Instead of arguing, I growled with annoyance. He had me there. My driving record wasn’t exactly gleaming. I mean, despite having no memory of either event, I’ve been both ticketed and cut from a car wreck in the last six months. I had to admit that the facts didn’t exactly instill confidence. But still.
“You’re bossy,” I sassed when he emerged and stretched his back out.
“I’m really not.” A smirk tipped one corner of his mouth and a glint entered his eyes. “I gotta admit, you look mighty good with her in your arms, darlin’.”
I shifted Posie’s weight slightly, coming off nonchalant despite acknowledging the stirring of maternal instinct deep in my chest.
“Is she ready to be buckled in?”
Reed’s irises cleared. “She is. Lay her in there for me, and I’ll buckle her up.”
“What if I drop her?”
“You won’t.”
“Jesus,” I hissed under my breath while awkwardly maneuvering her from my shoulder to her car seat. As soon as I had her nestled, I stepped back with my hands raised. “Done.”
Reed chuckled, then leaned in to buckle her. When he was done, he clicked the door closed and pulled me into his arms. “You did great, babe. And I’ve been waiting for both our hands to be free.”
My eyes narrowed. “Why?”
The glint re-entered his dark eyes as he took my face in his hands. “Because I’ve been desperate to kiss you properly.”