23. Chapter 23
I’d been working at FarmMart, a high-end organic grocery store, for three weeks now, and it paid so well.
At fifteen bucks an hour, it was more money than I’d ever made.
Stix also worked here and helped me get the job.
I mostly spent my time stocking the shelves and prepping food in the back, which I did five days a week.
The job was relatively mindless, but the money was too good to pass up.
Fridays and Saturdays were the worst. I needed to work at the grocery store, then rush home for a quick shower before Sam and I headed to work at Alpha’s for the night.
By the time Sunday rolled along, I would be too tired to do much of anything, even skating.
Not that I could skate anyway since my board split down the middle after crashing on a half-pipe last week, and I hadn’t replaced it yet.
Working a second job hadn’t only been hard on me, but it’d been hard on Sam.
It was understandable since he loved having me around during the day, used to routine and structure, even if that structure could stress him out.
If he forgot things, I would usually be there to remind him.
Now he needed to rely on text messages from me, if I could even remember.
And sometimes, he’d text me several times at once with random questions.
I didn’t know if he just wanted to check up on me to maintain some connection or if he really wanted to know.
If I didn’t respond right away, he’d hammer me with more texts.
It wasn’t easy to respond to him all the time on busy days.
But the worst of it was when I got home.
Sam would be completely agitated and stressed.
He didn’t like such big changes in our routines.
His insecurity would peak, thinking I’d leave him because I was forced to work so much.
His words. Instead of relaxing, I would have to reassure him, and once he finally calmed down, I would have to make dinner.
Sam could cook, but lately, he’d been all over the place, and had been forgetting. Neither of us liked this situation, but we needed the money. It was exhausting trying to stretch every single dollar.
He couldn’t help being stressed out, and I needed to keep reminding myself of that so I didn’t get upset with him or snap.
After dinner, things would settle down, and we would curl up on the couch, watching TV and snuggling together. Sometimes, we explored sex more. At that point, I’d finally relax.
God, I loved Sam so much, but sometimes I felt utterly alone. I had friends to talk to, but not about this. I didn’t know how to navigate working so much, helping Sam, and dealing with the negative emotions that had been plaguing me.
After working three weeks in two jobs, I quickly wore thin. This wasn’t sustainable, but there was nothing I could do. I had to work. Sam also needed more help than I could give, but how? He refused to see any doctors.
I stepped out into the spring late afternoon. It was still cool outside, but all the trees and plants slowly started to come to life. I took a deep breath of the chilly air and walked to the bus stop to take me home.
It was Saturday, so I had to head to work in a couple of hours again at Alpha’s, dreading the late night. To make matters worse, today was my twenty-first birthday.
Fuck, it wasn’t like me to be down in the dumps, but I was fucking tired. My entire body was exhausted. To boost my mood, I imagined my first paycheck next week and what kind of board I would buy. I couldn’t spend a lot of money, but I didn’t want to buy a used one this time.
As I rode the bus, I got another text from Sam. I sighed and swiped my phone open.
Sam: What time are you going to be home?
Me: I’m on my way.
Sam: You’re on the bus?
Me: Yep.
Sam: I missed you.
Me: I missed you, too.
Sam: Happy birthday!
He sent me several partying emojis, which made me laugh and feel a little better. I loved that he always remembered.
When I stepped through the door, I found Sam waiting for me with a massive smile and the pent-up energy of a toddler wanting all the candy in the grocery aisle.
“Happy birthday!”
My laugh was tired as he lunged at me and pulled me into a hug. “Thanks, baby.”
“You’re finally legal.”
“That I am.”
Sam cupped my face and looked deeply into my eyes as his brows furrowed. “You look tired.”
“I am.”
“I hope you’re not too tired because you need to get ready for work. We’re going in early for a little surprise,” he said, shoving me toward the bathroom. “Shower. Move.”
Now I was waking up and excited to go to work. I wasn’t sure what I’d expected—certainly not a surprise. I just assumed today would be like any other day.
“I’m going. I’m going.”
“Tomorrow, we’ll sleep in and cuddle. When you’re well-rested enough, we’ll have sex.
Lots of sex. And blow jobs. Gotta have those.
And maybe we can get some skating in… no, ah, we can’t do that.
Whoops. No board. So, we’ll just have fun in bed.
Or we can just kiss if you’re too tired.
I love kissing you. When you get stubble, it kind of tickles, and I like it. ”
I grabbed his face and pulled him down in said kiss. “It all sounds perfect.”
It really did.
As soon as Sam and I got to Alpha’s, having had to take the bus again, which was getting fucking old, Alpha dragged us all into the employee lounge.
All our friends were there, surrounding a table with a chocolate cake in the middle, and there was a bottle of fancy bourbon with several shot glasses.
Jazz and Blondie hugged me and wished me a happy birthday first, and next was Stix. Alpha shook my hand, as did Stone. Ajax’s smile was slightly demented, but he always looked like that as he lifted me in the air like I was a fucking toddler and hugged the hell out of me.
“Can’t… breathe,” I rasped.
He laughed and finally put me down.
Last, Sam gave me a quick kiss on the lips. “Happy birthday, Star.”
My heart and stomach flipped around with the love from this strange, found family. I loved them all.
“Thank you all so much.”
Ajax slapped a meaty hand on my back, nearly toppling me forward. “Can’t have a twenty-first birthday without recognition or… alcohol.” He winked and laughed.
Alpha poured us a finger of Bulleit Bourbon. “This is the good stuff. Perfect for the birthday boy.” When Jazz reached for a glass, he smacked her hand away. “Not for you or Blondie, Missy. Do you want me to get arrested and have the bar shut down?”
She huffed and folded her arms. “We drink all the time.”
“Not in my bar, you don’t.”
“Fine!”
Blondie didn’t look happy either, but he didn’t argue as much as his twin sister.
“You two will have your moment soon enough.”
Jazz rolled her eyes. “Yeah, like in two years… lame.”
Alpha ignored her complaints and raised his glass, and we all followed suit. “Here’s to Nacho. I hope you have an amazing birthday for an amazing young man.”
The bourbon went down surprisingly smoothly, but the liquor burned once it reached my stomach.
Sam walked out of the lounge while Alpha cut the cake, but he soon returned, holding a long box wrapped with navy blue and white striped paper.
I knew exactly what he held. I swallowed the lump in my throat at the gift as my tired emotions tried to take over.
One thing we’d never done for each other was buy gifts, choosing to save money instead.
While living in foster care and on the streets, we could never afford them, so we just didn’t bother.
He handed it to me, and I held the wrapped box close against my chest as I looked at him. “Thank you,” I whispered.
“It’s not just from me. Everyone chipped in.”
“But you came up with the idea,” Stix said.
Sam smiled at me and stood close. “Open it. I hope you like it.”
“I’ll love it, no matter what.”
I tore the paper off and opened the box holding the beautiful, brand-new skateboard—my first. It was absolute perfection.
I ran my fingers over the bright teal-blue underside.
It was so smooth. The only thing painted on it was [CSS] , the name of the skateboard brand, which was rated as one of the best for tricks.
“God, I… love it so much.” My eyes welled.
Why was I getting so emotional over this?
Maybe because I’d never had a gift like this before, and it was brand new.
Sam and I didn’t even buy brand-new phones or earbuds.
They were always used or refurbished. Even our clothes were used. “But this is so much.”
Stix rested a hand on my shoulder. “Not really. Sure, the board wasn’t cheap, but seriously, we only chipped in about ten bucks each.”
“I picked out one that was plain so you can decorate underneath how you want,” Sam said.
“Thanks,” I whispered, struggling to hold in my emotions. My bottom lip trembled a bit, and I sucked it in so no one would see.
“One more gift,” Stix announced, handing me a plastic grocery bag. I opened it and peeked inside to find a black T-shirt. “It’s from Goodwill.”
I pulled it out, unfolded it, and snorted a laugh as I read the words. ‘I Had A Dad Bod Before It Was Cool.’ “You and your ironic T-shirts, Stix. I love it. Thanks.”
We all quickly ate some cake before we had to get ready for work.
Everyone chatted, even Sam, while I stayed silent.
My breath came in shudders as I ate my delicious cake.
I was so focused on my gift, the love I had for this family, Sam, and how tired I was physically and emotionally.
It was getting to be all too much for me to process.
“You okay?” Alpha asked, startling me.
“Yeah, totally.” I slipped on a mask full of smiles, now truly understanding why Sam did the same thing all the time. But Alpha’s quirked brow and frown said he wasn’t buying my lie. At least he didn’t push me to open up.