29. Chapter 29
My stretch was long and hard, untangling knots in my muscles I was too young for, the drawback of being bedridden for so long. I was twenty-one going on fifty-one, or so it felt. Except that I woke up with morning wood. It had been a while since I did that. Pain and the meds had killed my libido.
With my eyes still closed, I rubbed my cock and thrust a little at my palm. I hadn’t intended to jack off with Sam sleeping next to me, but I just needed some friction before I got up to take a piss.
As I continued to pump myself languidly, my eyes popped open when a hand suddenly grasped mine and tossed it off my dick.
“Mine,” Sam said. “Fuck if you’re going to play with yourself. I’ve been waiting for weeks to have you. I get dibs, not your fucking hand.”
I snorted a laugh, but his hovering over me and ripping my underwear off and over my cast, growling, quickly sobered me up. He fucking growled at me. My dick pulsed at the sound. I’d never seen him so aggressive before.
“Whoa there, tiger…” I laughed again.
“Tiger this.” He flipped me the fucking bird, making me laugh harder. God, it felt good. The best way to wake up.
He stood, quickly stripped off his clothes and sat between my legs, grabbing my cock at the base.
He tugged on it a few times, practically drooling as he looked at it.
“I know this isn’t like me, but fuck… I’ve been dying for this dick.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to touch you and sleep next to you without actually having you? ”
Said dick pulsed and throbbed at his words. I loved this side of Sam. “Yes, every day when we were only friends.”
He eyed me with steel green eyes. “Truth.” He looked back down at my cock. “Shit, look at you leak. Hot.”
His tongue swiped over my tip, and my back arched off the bed. “Fuck!”
“So good… I miss your taste.”
I spread my legs as I thrust deeper into his warm and wet mouth. “God, baby… more. I’m not gonna last long.”
He popped off and smirked. “Good. We’ll go slower later. Right now, I’m just hungry for you.”
Sam shoved a finger in his mouth, sucking on it. When he pulled it out, it left behind a long trail of saliva. He spread my cheeks with one hand and inched his wet finger inside my hole. “Uh… yes. Shit… more. Oh god…”
He thrust it in and out for a while before he attacked my dick again, sucking me like a goddamn straw. Once he pushed his finger in deeper and hit that soft spot, I fucking blew. My back leaped off the bed, and I clung to the sheets underneath me to keep from floating away while crying out.
My climax came out of nowhere. I’d never nutted that fast in my life.
“Shit, shit, shit…” I panted over and over.
My body shuddered from the aftershocks as my mind shorted out for a moment. Once I came back online, all my muscles and skin went numb.
“That was…” I couldn’t find the words to save my life.
Sam sat up, pressed his lips to mine, and shoved his tongue in my mouth, allowing me to taste myself, which was oddly hot.
“Best BJ ever,” I said when he pulled away.
Before I got a chance to reciprocate, he pulled out his cock, still wearing his underwear, spit in his hand, and stroked himself over my stomach.
“Don’t you want me to help you with that?”
“No,” he breathed. “No time.”
Watching him masturbate over me was fucking sexy as hell. His muscles rippled, and his mouth hung open, staring at his cock, waiting for the expected load to dump on me.
Sam growled again and threw his head back as he came all over me, spattering my chest, and some even hit my chin. Once he finished, he fell on me and groaned with his face in my throat. “God, that was fucking nice. I really needed that.”
I chuckled. “You should’ve let me handle that for you.”
“Too impatient.”
I snorted a laugh. “Apparently.”
After we got cleaned up, it was back to reality.
A cast still held my leg bones together, but the doctors said it was okay for me to move around more, watch TV, and play on my phone regularly.
I’d been bored as fuck the past three weeks, and as much as I wanted to cheat, my headaches kept me from doing much.
The doctors told me to expect lingering headaches for several more weeks and up to a year.
It fucking sucked, but it was out of my control.
In two days, I had to go back to work, crutches and all, which was fine.
I needed to be earning some money again.
The gratefulness I felt that this small store allowed me to recover instead of firing me was overwhelming, and I became fiercely loyal to them.
Stix probably helped with that, but still, they could’ve said tough shit.
Regardless, it was tiring, but sacrifices had to be made. It was the way of life, which was never easy and probably never would be.
While I’d recovered, Sam had been great. Did he struggle, forget, or overbuy at the store? Sure. But fuck if he didn’t try his best to do most of it on his own.
My being overbearing hit me squarely in the face.
If I’d only let up a little bit of my control.
I did sometimes, but Sam could do more on his own.
I hadn’t been trying to be controlling, just protective.
Looking at it from a different perspective, I recognized how I prevented him from being too independent.
Despite all his trauma, he was resilient.
Hell, he even fought his demons to visit me at the hospital.
Fuck, I loved him.
We sat at the kitchen table, eating sandwiches for lunch. Sam scrolled on his phone, oblivious to my staring. His red strands fell in his face, and he kept brushing them away. Then he’d wipe a crumb away from his mouth. Watching him never got old.
“Sam?”
“Hmm?”
“Look at me.”
He glanced up from his phone with his bright green eyes.
“I’m sorry.”
His brows scrunched, probably reaching into his memory banks for something I may have done.
“I thought I was protecting you, but it turned into control. You’re so strong and brave. It seems like I don’t give you enough credit for that.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I run everything, from bills to grocery shopping to making you lists, but you don’t need help for everything.
Yeah, you help out, but it’s like I kept doing these things more for me than for you.
I figured that if I took good care of you, you’d never leave me, and I didn’t want you stressed out.
I see that now. I’ve been… overbearing.”
“But I like it. You set routines I can understand and help me to remember things. It makes me feel… safe and cared for. You’re not harming me, if that’s what you think.”
“Yeah, you forget sometimes, but so what? I just…”
Sam put down his sandwich and grabbed my hand resting on the table. “It works for us. I don’t want things to change. It’s… been hard enough with you working more.”
I nodded. “Okay. I just want you to know how amazing you are. And if you need more space, please tell me.”
His smile grew and turned crooked. “So are you. Neither of us is perfect, Nate. I really struggle with grasping that sometimes. I don’t always see myself in a good light, but that doesn’t make us any less special…
for each other. Maybe others don’t see what we do, but we fit and work well together, like little machine parts that spin and move in sync, so everything works properly.
Some bits might be rusted or worn, but the machine continues to move with some love and maintenance. ”
I chuckled. He had such an awesome way of seeing the world. “That’s a good way to look at it. Thanks, Sam, for always being you.”
I chugged down some apple juice as Sam went back to scrolling his phone. “I’m going to text Alpha for help in finding my parents.”
“Okay.” Sam stood and pulled the chair next to me. “Let’s do this.”
Me: Can you do me a favor?
Alpha: Of course, anything.
Me: I want to find my parents, but I don’t know how.
Alpha: You sure?
Me: Yeah.
Alpha: We can do an online search for your birth certificate and get your parents’ names from there, and social services may still have your records.
Me: Any help you can give me.
A second later, my phone rang. “Hey.”
“Is there a reason you want to reach out to them or to find them now?” Alpha asked. “I want to make sure you’re certain because you may regret it. Sometimes there’s truth in that old saying, ‘ignorance is bliss.’ ”
“Yeah, it’s what has held me back for so long, but I think I’m ready now.
I’ll accept whatever the truth is. I’ve felt abandoned by them for so long.
Right now, I just want to know who they are.
Then I’ll decide if I want to approach them or not, especially after being in the hospital, where they asked me about all my health history, and I wasn’t able to tell the doctors anything.
So, at least I can get some history from them. ”
“Alright. Let’s find your parents.”
It took nearly a month to get a copy of my birth certificate and the rest of my records from foster care. The process took so long that I almost gave up wanting to even try reaching out.
Now, Sam sat next to me as we scanned my birth certificate. The piece of paper told me nothing other than my name, place of birth, sex, birth date, and my parents’ names.
Mother: Ines Hidalgo
Father: Isaiah Lamont
“Aw, you were six pounds and two ounces. Hard to believe you were so small,” Sam said, resting his chin on my shoulder from behind so he could read everything with me.
I snorted a laugh and rolled my eyes. “Shut up. I know I’m short.”
He kissed my cheek. “You’re perfect and adorable.”
I opened up the file of photocopies of all the paperwork social services had on me since I went into the system as an infant.
“Fuck, my mother was fifteen when she had me, and my father was sixteen. Jesus.”
With a deep breath, I kept reading about my origin story. My eyes instantly stopped at the word ‘death.’ “She died a week after having me.”
“I’m so sorry, Nate.”
“I’m… not sure how I feel about that since I have no attachment to her at all, but still, it really does close that door.”
“What about your dad?”
I kept reading. “He…”
He abandoned me .
My stomach twisted despite knowing the truth. “Uhm, it just says he forfeited his parental rights. He struggled to take care of me.”
“Fuck, Nate. That really sucks.”
“It’s fine. I understood the chances of that happening were high. If he couldn’t take care of me, then he couldn’t. He was only sixteen and just a kid himself, and my mother had died. I guess I understand.”
“But it doesn’t hurt any less.”
I looked back at Sam, loving how he understood me so well and validated my feelings. “Yeah, it still kind of stings.”
“Do you… want to find him now that you know who he is?”
“I’m not sure. He could’ve found me all this time, right?”
“Maybe. But you can at least find some details about his life.”
“I guess. I should probably think about it more before I do anything.”
Sam pulled me onto his lap and hugged me. I rested my head on his. “Whatever you choose, I’m here.”
“Thanks, baby.”
Part of me wanted to know my father. To at least look him in the eye and see if he had any remorse or if he no longer cared, if ever.
It took some digging, but I’d managed to find my father’s phone number. Now to get the guts to call him.
Sam and I headed to a playground nearby since the day was really nice and warm, being in the middle of spring.
It felt like a good, neutral place to call him.
For some reason, I wasn’t comfortable calling him from my home.
Plus, it was nice to get out since I’d been cooped up for weeks inside our stale apartment.
The playground was empty since the kids were at school, so Sam and I sat on some swings, smoking as I held my phone, staring at the blank screen as if it had offended me somehow.
“You don’t have to do this.”
I nodded. “I know, but I also need to. What if I don’t and always wonder what he was like? Or what if he dies like my mother and another door closes, with me never learning anything about them?”
“Do you intend to reunite with him?”
“I… haven’t thought that far ahead.”
“If I had a chance to call my parents, or even wanted to, I’d tell them how much I hated them for putting me through that torture.
Then, I’d probably ask if they even missed me or cared.
Did they feel guilty for being so cruel?
Hell, when I ran, did they look for me? Did they just let me go?
Did they… cry or regret what they’d done? Did they—”
“Do you want to find them?”
Sam scowled and shook his head. “Fuck no. I hate them. I have enough closure. Plus…”
I looked up at him, staring out across the playground full of dead grass, yet the trees and shrubs were full of fresh leaves. The chain-link fencing was rusted. The entire vibe was one of depression and hope. It was weird, yet I related to it somehow.
“Plus, what?”
“There’s a lot of fear. What if they force me to go back to that place? What if…”
“They can’t legally. You’re an adult now, Sam, but I get why you’re afraid. I would be, too.”
Sam grabbed the chain of my swing and pulled me close to him. He pressed his head to mine before giving me a short but encouraging kiss. “You can do this, but only if you want to.”
“Let’s do it.”
I dialed my father’s number, and it rang three times before a deep voice answered the other line.
“Hello?”
“Is… Is this Isaiah Lamont?”