Chapter 7
DORI
“Jami, tell me what I should do.” I sit next to his hospital bed.
Samantha asked me not to decide who I want to be with without seriously thinking about her question, so that’s what I’m doing.
Who do I want to build a future with?
I have years of memories with Jami. So many of those steal my breath. We’ve been friends and lovers. I have to believe all the history we share means something. But what if he wakes up and decides I’m not worth the trouble?
My mind wanders back to the most intimate night we’ve spent together—the night we let down our defenses and finally allowed our connection to come alive.
I’m on my back as Jami devours me. “Jami, I want more.”
“Is this what you want more of?” He slides his fingers inside me and pumps them harder. “You’re nice and ready for me. I think it’s time you get on me.”
“Please,” I breathe.
He pulls his fingers out and licks me one more time. “Fucking delicious.”
His tone and his demeanor are beyond enticing. There’s nothing I don’t want him to do. I’m at his mercy and want more.
He crawls up, planting tiny kisses on my stomach. When he gets to my mouth, he dives into a sensual kiss while stroking my cheek. I melt into his touch and let the tenderness of the moment fill my soul.
Jami pulls away and rolls onto his back. “Climb on and ride me. Take all the pleasure you need.”
“I want you to fill all of me.” I straddle him and hover over his body.
“Then take every inch you want. I’m yours to have.” He reaches up and pulls me down for another kiss.
As our tongues intertwine, I line myself up with him. We’ve been experiencing each other for a while now, and my third orgasm has been building for a few minutes.
Taking him and sliding up and down his length is going to make me explode. I break away and guide him into me.
“You feel so good, Jami.” I suck in a breath, trying to hold on for more than a second.
“Fuck, sweetness. There’s no word for how good you feel.” He drives himself into me.
His thumb finds my clit and almost pushes me over the edge. I squeeze my walls, trying to keep it together. We move in sync like we’ve done this a million times.
He knows my body and how to get me to respond. We continue the ecstasy of enjoying one another for a few minutes in an erotic dance while I desperately try not to come.
His free hand grips my hip as I grind down on him harder. I still haven’t taken him the entire way, so I inch farther down.
“Take all of me. Let me see how well you handle me.” He pushes up at the same time I go down.
I run my hands over his chest. It’s too dark for me to make out his tattoos, but relying on my sense of touch allows me to connect to his body more fully. His muscles are hard and defined. I want to lick all over him.
He swirls his hips as he plows into me, and I nearly pass out in a moment of bliss.
“Jami…” I moan .
He reaches with both hands and cups my breasts, rolling my nipples between his fingers.
It’s like there’s a cord attached to them that goes straight between my thighs. I shudder as shivers spread over my skin.
He releases a low, sultry laugh. “Does that feel good?”
“Yes.” I smile down at him. “Why didn’t we do this sooner?”
He doesn’t respond. Instead, he thrusts into me with more determination, almost as if my question released something in him—maybe years of bottled-up desire? I don’t know if that’s the case for him, but it is for me.
I slide up and down over his length. All my emotions bubble up and I get a sense of closeness with him I’ve never had with anyone else. It’s profound.
This man knows me like no other. He’s been a constant in my life for as long as I can remember. And now, he’s a part of my flesh and soul. I allow myself to go there and finally admit I’m desperately in love with Jamison Stone.
His fingertips swipe over my bud as he dives into me. “Let yourself go. Be a good girl and come for me.”
His commanding words and fluid movements are more than I expect. I gasp and throw my head back. His thumb circles my clit and I quake in bliss. I come so hard I see stars.
“That was beautiful. You’re so fucking gorgeous.” He lets up on the pressure and gently guides me out of the sky and back to him.
As I bring myself back to the moment, he slows his pace. The way he stares at me in the moonlight makes my heart explode.
I gaze at him with love filling every part of me. The words are right there on the tip of my tongue. I’m about to tell him I love him.
“I don’t want to come yet.” He rolls me over and pulls out of me.
His actions snap me out of the moment. “Why?”
“Because I’m enjoying being with you and want it to last all night.”
I decide not to tell him how I feel. It might not land right, seeing as I just came off a high from an incredible orgasm.
“Why didn’t I just tell you then?” I mumble to myself. “What was I so afraid of? ”
I spend more time sorting out my feelings for him. As I look back on our childhood, I’m filled with the bittersweet pangs of missed opportunities, each one a faded photograph of what could have been.
I had so many chances, so why didn’t I take them?
What stopped me from taking a risk with the man who’s always had my heart?
Jami and I would have to deal with my brother if we were to give our relationship a try. And he’s moving to Miami when my life and job are here.
But then there’s Hunter. Sex and attraction have never been our problem. Our issues stem from making our relationship real. We’ve always been in a bubble.
For a single day in Paris, amidst the charming cafes and cobblestone streets, we acted like a normal couple. It was a fleeting moment of normalcy in our otherwise unconventional relationship.
During the remaining time we spent abroad, and over the two weeks I stayed with him, an understanding friendship blossomed between us, strengthening our bond.
Where does that leave us?
His dedication and generosity have been a constant source of comfort and support in my life. He even went into therapy to better himself for me.
But does that mean I owe him my future?
What kind of person would I be if I walked away now?
I love him, but am I staying with him because I feel obligated after all he’s done for me?
He loves me, and I feel the same about him. We enjoy each other and I can see us growing closer if I just gave our relationship a fighting chance.
But working for him is a problem. I could lose my job. Or worse, I would be like my mom if I quit to be with Hunter. I couldn’t handle that.
This situation is tearing me apart. Both men come with obstacles. None that will be easy to get through. I’m standing at a crossroads, completely lost and unsure of which way to go.
Where does my soul lead me?
I love them both, but who do I love to the depths of my soul?
This isn’t a matter of who I can live with and love. It boils down to the one whose presence is essential to my existence—the one I love with an all-consuming passion and can’t see my life without.
Something brushes over my hair. I lift my hazy head off Jami’s hospital bed and try to get my bearings. I blink a few times and then find his blue eyes staring at me.
“Hey, sweet temptress.” His voice gravelly and scratchy.
My soul heats and my body tingles. “Oh my god. You’re awake.”
“Trying.”
“Shh. Don’t say anything. I’ve got to go get the nurse.” I stand to leave, but the nurse is already coming to Jami’s bedside.
She rubs her hands together like she just got done washing them. “I had a feeling you were waking up.”
I glance at her. “How did you know?”
“I’ve been stationed outside his room and keeping track of his vital signs.” She moves to the other side of his bed and addresses him. “How’s your pain?”
He grimaces. “My back and chest hurt.”
“I bet they do. I’ll have the doctor adjust your medication now that you’re awake.” She reaches up to his IV bag. “Jamison, do you know why you’re in the hospital? ”
His head rolls back toward me and narrows in on me with heavy lids. “No. What happened?”
“You were shot. You’re in the ICU because you had surgery and a blood transfusion.” She adjusts a dial on a monitor.
“Is that why my shoulder hurts?” He glances at his right side.
“Yes. You’ll need to rehab from your injuries, but don’t worry about that right now.” She steps away from his bed and peers down at him. “I’m going to let the doctor know you’re awake.”
The tone in her words is confident, but I can’t shake my unease. My stomach knots and my chest squeezes. I’m covered in a cloak made of anxious threads, but I put on a brave face for Jami’s sake.
She leaves his room to go notify the doctor of Jami’s status. Once she’s gone, I help him drink some water and get as comfortable as possible while trying to hide my concern.
I sit next to him and take his hand in mine. “You gave me quite the scare.”
“Why was I shot?”
A quick replay of that day flashes through my mind.
I shrink as guilt rains over me. “I think the bullets were meant for me.”
“Why?”
“Before you were hit, there were two red lasers pointed at me. You stepped in front of me and saved my life.”
He stares at the ceiling. “I can’t remember anything.”
“Don’t worry about it now. You need to rest.” A deep sigh escapes my lips, heavy with unspoken words.
I almost lost him, but now he’s awake. It’s all I could ever hope for. My overwhelming emotions take over.
“Jami, I can’t tell you how glad I am you’re awake. I thought I had lost you.” A tear trickles down my cheek .
He gazes over at me. “You can’t get rid of me that easily.”
“Thank God for that.”
He squeezes my hand. “Dori, I had some of the weirdest dreams.”
“Tell me about them.”
“They’re fuzzy, but I know they were strange.” He takes a moment to recollect them.
I swipe a lock of hair from his forehead. “Don’t strain yourself. They’ll come back when you’re more rested.”
“They felt so real.”
“Yeah? Are you sure they weren’t memories?”
My phone rings and I peek at the screen. It’s from a number I don’t recognize.
“Hello.”
“Hey, Dori. It’s Aiden. I got word about Jami. How is he?”
My shoulders relax as relief swims through my blood. “Oh, Aiden. I’m so glad you got the message. I was worried?—”
“How’s Jami?”
I smile. “He just woke up, and he’s talking, so I think he’ll be okay.”
“Fuck, that’s good news. I… Fuck, it’s just good news.” Aiden coughs as if he’s trying to disguise his emotions.
My gaze reaches Jami’s. “Are you going to be able to come out here and see him?”
“No. I’m still undercover and shouldn’t even be talking to you, but they made an exception. Since he’s not a blood relative, I had to beg.”
“Well, I’m glad they made the exception. How are you otherwise?”
“Fine. Hey, look. I can’t talk long, so give Jami my best.”
“Um…okay. When do you think I’ll hear from you again?”
“It’s hard to say.” He muffles the receiver and says something to someone. “Hey, Dori. I’ve got to run. Tell Jami I love him. I love you too. Don’t forget it.”
“We love you too, Aiden, and there’s no way we’d ever forget it.”
We say goodbye, and I place my phone away. “Aiden sends you his best and said to tell you he loves you.”
“He can’t get out here?” Jami’s voice is weak.
“No, but you know how that is.” I slide my hand into his.
“That I do.” He strokes my knuckles with his thumb as his gaze soaks me in. “I was dreaming about you.”
“Really? About what?” Warmth emanates around me.
“Lots of crazy things, but one thing that stands out was you told me I had to fight and come back to you.”
“That wasn’t a dream. I’ve been repeating that since they let me see you.” My love for him douses me, causing happy tears to form.
His eyebrows crease. “Then the rest wasn’t a dream either?”
“I don’t know. What do you think I said or did?”
He starts to laugh, then winces. “Shit, that hurts.”
“Should I get someone?” I start to rise.
“No. I’ll be fine.” He tugs on my hand.
I settle back in my seat. “What were you laughing about?”
“Even now, you’re trying to get around telling me how you feel. I’ve been shot, Dori. Don’t you think that deserves something?” A lazy smile curls from his lips.
I roll my eyes and laugh. “Yes, I guess it does.”
“So…”
My heart does a backward flip. “I told you to fight so you wouldn’t leave me. I told you I love you, and you had to fight so we could be together.”
His expression softens. “Do you mean that?”
Every cell in my body demands honesty. I hesitate for a moment as all my conversations with my therapist echo in my ears. He’s the one I love with every fiber of my soul .
Knowing that, I give him the truth. “I do. I’m not leaving you ever again. Jamison Stone, I love you, and now you’re stuck with me.”
My decision doesn’t waver. Having almost lost him, the thought of another day apart is unbearable. The only thing I can do now is try to make it work. He saved my life. He’s my soulmate, and nothing else matters.
His eyes twinkle mischievously. “I must be on some crazy good drugs.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because you didn’t try to deny it or come up with an excuse for why it didn’t matter. I’ve got to be hallucinating.”
I shake my head and smirk. “And look who has jokes.”
“I told you I was on good drugs.”
“You might be on meds, Jami, but you aren’t imagining things.” I lean over and plant a kiss on his lips.
I pull away, and his expression grows serious.
His eyes pierce into mine. “So you love me?”
“I sure do.” Tears of overwhelming relief and love balance on the edge of my lashes.
“What does that mean?”
“It means whatever you want it to mean. I’m not going anywhere. The ball’s in your court. If you still love me and want us to be together, then all you have to do is say so.”
He takes a few beats to contemplate my words. His eyes spin with a thousand different emotions.
“Dori, that's all I want.”
I pull in a hopeful breath. “Me too.”
“Then that settles it.” He releases a deep sigh. “I guess that means we’re finally going to take the plunge.”
“It looks like it.”
“God help us.”
I laugh. “We’re going to need it after the mess I’ve made.”
“About that.” He stares into my eyes. “Where does that leave you and Hunter? ”
“Nowhere. Let’s not focus on that right now.” I shift to adjust his blankets.
He stops me and takes my hand in his. “I could rest easier if you told me the truth.”
“About what?”
“We’ve been through this before, and I deserve to know. How does Hunter feel about your decision?”