Chapter 9
Shannon
It was impossible not to notice the heat creeping up Hudson’s neck when I handed him his pen.
I don’t know what hit the door that day, but it was loud enough to startle me.
By the time I crossed the foyer to peer out of the glass, I only saw the back of his truck and his pen on the ground, along with an envelope I didn’t have to sign for because it only contained a new magnetic pack of grocery sheets.
I was so turned on by the idea of him watching me, I had to get myself off a second time. I came quickly as I pictured those amber eyes and the muscles that beg for attention beneath his uniform.
Today, as if taunting me, he wore only a t-shirt instead of his short-sleeved, button-up uniform top and I was wet instantly just from the way it was hugging his pecs.
The pictures I sent Greg from that day did nothing to stoke the fires of passion like I’d hoped.
Instead, I earned a lecture about how easy it is to hack phones these days and what people would think if these got out.
I tucked my tail between my legs and apologized while my resentment continued to grow.
Gregor only came home for lunch today because he left something in his office that he needs for a client briefing later this afternoon. He’d asked me to run it to him and was less than thrilled when I told him I couldn’t interrupt Serafina’s nap because otherwise, she wouldn’t sleep tonight.
I’m glad I didn’t agree because although I didn’t love interacting with Hudson while Gregor was home, it was better than missing him altogether. These brief glimpses and distant flirting are becoming something I look forward to in my day.
Naptime has certainly gotten a lot more exciting.
“He always so chatty?” Gregor asks once Hudson is gone, not bothering to look up from where’s he’s cutting into the recently delivered box.
My skin is still tingling everywhere Hudson’s eyes landed as he scanned me discreetly.
My brows furrow in annoyance that Gregor is acting like he cares about Hudson’s attention when John Cox’s hand was on my body, yet he couldn’t muster an ounce of concern.
“Of course not,” I snap. “It’s not like the man has ample time to get to know everyone he delivers to. ”
“He seems intent on getting to know you,” Gregor says, making my hackles rise.
“Jealousy doesn’t suit you, Gregor. Especially considering I’ve been trying to get your attention for the last six months, and you’ve turned down ninety-five percent of my advances,” I fire back, annoyed that he would choose now to start paying attention.
In a very uncharacteristic move, Gregor grabs my hips and pulls me to him, crushing his mouth to mine before pulling back, his eyes boring into me.
“Well, you’ve got my attention now,” he says through gritted teeth, grinding his hips against my pelvis.
It probably shouldn’t, because of the jealousy it’s coming from, but the move turns me on and I melt against him. This. I’ve wanted more of this. Passion. Possessiveness. A desire for me that extends beyond the image we project. The image I project as the very embodiment of a trophy wife.
I reach between us to stroke Gregor, but find him limp in his trousers again, telling me he doesn’t feel the same way about this interaction. Not to worry, I’m not afraid to work for it. But before I have a chance to get him there, he pulls away from me.
“I’ve got to get back to work.It’ll be a late night for me. Don’t wait up.” His tone is flat, all traces of the heat of his kiss, gone.
“Gregor,” I plead. “Why the sudden change of heart?” I follow him as he makes his way back toward the kitchen and the door that leads to the garages.
“You’ll excuse me if I don’t want an orgasm that was spurred on by another man,” he says drily.
Okay, so I’ve noticed that Hudson is attractive, but I haven’t acted on it beyond getting excited to lay eyes on him. I’ve done nothing to warrant Gregor’s harsh words or tone.
“Have you lost your mind?” I snap angrily.
“Do you hear yourself? Greg, I’ve done nothing but try to spend time with you, be intimate with you, please you.
And now you’re angry at me and jealous of the man who delivers our packages because he had the decency to say hello and offer an apology after noticing I was on the verge of a breakdown? ”
“I am not jealous of the delivery boy, Shannon,” he says, grabbing his keys off the counter, still not looking at me.
I move to block his path, forcing him to blow out a frustrated sigh.
“I just don’t understand why you don’t want me,” I try to explain.
“I do want you, but I don’t understand this sudden need to be down my pants all the time,” he retorts.
I stand there, frozen in shock, for a moment longer.
Sudden…he thinks this desire in me is sudden.
Perhaps he feels that way because I wasn’t very interested in sex during my last trimester, but who is?
I felt like a beached whale. But as soon as Serafina was born, I returned to my gym routine with my personal trainer and restored my pre-pregnancy physique.
And while my body came back, our sex life didn’t.
I back away from him as if I’ve just suffered a physical blow and change the subject entirely. “Serafina has a check-up at the doctor tomorrow and then I’m going to take her to the lake if you can join us,” I whisper, too stunned to say it any louder.
“Tomorrow’s Friday, Shannon. Some of us have to work.”
My mouth falls open. Literally hangs by the joint as I stare at my husband, rage building in my veins. I turn my back to him so he can’t see me cry because right now, he doesn’t deserve my tears.
“What have I done to make you so contrite?” I ask.
But hearing the garage door moving in its tracks, I turn around to discover Greg’s already out the door.
Once I know I’m alone, I sit with my hurt and anger. I look at my phone for the time and know I only have a couple minutes before Serafina wakes.
I’m not vindictive by nature, but Greg’s words really hurt, his thoughts toward me hurt even more. Remembering the heat in Hudson’s eyes when I came down the stairs today, I easily justify my next action by saying it’s time I did something for myself.
Opening the app of my favorite lingerie company, I place an order for fifteen-hundred-dollars-worth of silk, satin, and lace.
There’s even a disclaimer on the shipping page.
Orders over $500 will require a signature.
Perfect.
Serafina does great at the doctor’s office. Everyone coos over how adorable she is in her yellow and pink dress. She’s giggly today, and didn’t even cry when they gave her the shot.
My heart, on the other hand, pinched so tightly I thought I might topple over. When her eyes sought mine for reassurance, I felt a strong wave of love. The intensity behind the emotion was new, but not unpleasant in the slightest.
If I’m honest, I was fearful that my anger toward Greg would spill over onto Serafina, but I’m glad it seems to have had the opposite effect. I want to show her the unconditional love and support that she most likely won’t get from her father if this attitude of his is here to stay.
“Are you excited for our trip to the beach, baby girl?” I ask, peeking up to look at my daughter in the rear-view mirror every few seconds.
She’s smiling and playing with her toes, so I’ll take that as a yes.
I pull into a spot close to the walkway for the public swimming area which really clears out after Labor Day. People can still swim, but they’re warned that no lifeguard is on duty. Since it’s after Labor Day now, most people are utilizing other parts of the park.
Taking a baby to the lake is not for the faint of heart.
I pack Serafina’s wagon full of everything I brought and pray I haven’t forgotten something.
We’ll only be out here for a couple of hours, but forgetting something could mean cutting the trip even shorter.
Most of the crowds are reduced to small groups of locals, and I prefer this area when it’s quiet as opposed to fifty groups of college students blaring fifty different songs from portable speakers that get carried on the wind.
Thankfully, Serafina and I have our choice of spots today.
Only a few other patrons are relaxing in the sand as I pull the wagon along while carrying my daughter on my hip.
I set up Serafina’s tent to block the direct sun and excessive heat, thankful today isn’t windy—I’ve had this stupid thing ripped out of my hands more than once.
Next, I lay out the blanket, set up my chair, and give her all her favorite toys. She’s too young to play in the sand, but she enjoys her regular toys on the blanket with a change of scenery. I’ll make a true beach lover out of her yet because that’s where my heart truly lies.
When she starts to get fussy, I pick her up and walk to the water’s edge.
Sitting down with her on my lap, she giggles when the water lightly splashes over us from small waves created by the wake of passing boats just beyond the swimming ropes.
Her bonnet hides her face from me, but I can hear her delighted fits of laughter.
Suddenly, a shadow falls over us. “Shannon?”
Turning to look over my shoulder, I’m caught completely off guard.
“Holy shit.” I smack a hand over my mouth as my eyebrows shoot for my hair line. I’m less concerned that I cussed in front of my infant, and more concerned that I just breathlessly admitted my attraction to the shirtless man in front of me.
I scramble to stand, swallowing hard, my mouth suddenly dry.
“Hudson.” To my dismay, his name comes out as a shriek. Clearing my throat, I try again. “I mean, what are you doing out here at this hour?” I ask, Greg’s words haunting my mind. It’s Friday. Some of us have to work.
Hudson’s eyes stray to my bikini top and his tongue darts out, wetting his bottom lip before he brings his eyes back to mine and gives an answer.
“I, uh, switched days with a guy on weekend shift. He had a family emergency and is headed out of town tomorrow.”