5. Chapter Four
Chapter Four
Jax
T he moment Karla burst into the room with her dramatic hysterics has me all but growling. The doctor told Allie to trust her instincts, and I pray to God her instincts are fully intact when it comes to her psycho mother.
Noel, her father, looks relieved. No matter how I may feel about Allie's mother, I know how much her father loves his daughter. He's the one person who rivals the love I feel for Allie. When she disappeared, he was the only one who had any idea how badly I ached. The pain that just would never subside. I know a father's love is different, but it doesn't mean it doesn't run just as deep.
Her mother's over-the-top display to garner sympathy from anyone watching doesn't seem to fool a soul in the room. Even Detective Parsons seems a bit annoyed. Everyone knows how difficult of a relationship Karla and Allie had, so her histrionics won’t work here.
"You're alive," Noel gasps, his rust-colored hair much grayer than the last time I saw him .
He's not overly tall, but he can be commanding if he needs to be. Noting the bags under his eyes, it's clear the loss of his daughter has taken its toll on him. Knowing him as I do, I'm sure he didn't want to let himself hope Allie was really here and alive until he saw her for himself. Over the years, we've had a couple of leads that went nowhere, and I have to agree that the disappointment after hope hurts just as badly as losing her the first time. Sometimes worse.
It's strange to see Noel on the verge of tears like he is now. Even when Allie disappeared, he never showed his emotions around me. Not to this extent. We haven't officially seen each other since the police told him I was a very likely suspect despite my alibi and eyewitnesses. Karla certainly never let something as silly as an air-tight alibi change her mind on whether or not I had any part in harming Allie.
"Oh, baby," Karla says, cupping her daughter’s face. 'You look so ghastly."
"Because her appearance after being held captive for seven years should be the top of her list of concerns," I say, unable to hold back my snark. “Not, you know, getting free and being... alive?"
Allie's looks have always been a topic of conversation with Karla. She's always criticizing something or another, and it took me years to get Allie to see herself as beautiful. She's a remarkably attractive woman, but her mother helped destroy her self-esteem to the point of feeling worthless. It's one of the reasons Karla despises me. I stand up to her when she starts tearing Allie down.
Noel walks over and takes Allie's hand. "Are you okay?"
"They say I am," Allie says, looking down at their joined hands. "I mean, I feel like I've always felt. Well, I feel like I remember feeling."
"What do you mean? "
Detective Parsons rests a large hand on Noel’s shoulder. "She doesn't remember anything prior to waking up wherever she was being held."
"Oh my God," Noel gasps. "You don't know who I am, do you?"
Shaking her head, Allie shrugs. "I'm guessing you're my parents."
"We are.” Noel turns to the doctor with a concerned frown. “Is this permanent?"
"We're not sure. Her scans show she sustained a head injury, which is likely what's contributing to the memory loss. Other than that, she's malnourished, but overall, she has very minor injuries. She's really lucky," Dr. Westmore says.
"Well, we'll take care of that just as soon as we get you home," Karla says.
I jump up from the seat I was forced to sit in when Karla pushed me aside to look at her daughter, my gaze locking with hers. "Home?"
"Yes. She's obviously coming home with us. She has no memory, and we're her parents, Jackson."
"Absolutely not. She lives with me, in our house. The one she loves," I say with more bite than I probably should have in my tone.
Glaring at me, the older woman's impeccable chocolate brown hair doesn't even move as she shakes her head. "You are not her mother. In fact, aren't you engaged to someone else? You're about to marry another woman, so I think the last place my daughter should be is living with her former boyfriend and his fiancée. That's a ludicrous suggestion."
"Laura and I don't live together," I say, my teeth clenched, "and Allie coming home changes everything."
"Does it? Your love is just fickle by nature, huh?"
"I still live in the last house Allie did. You moved away a year after she disappeared. "
She makes a sound that I think is supposed to be a chuckle but sounds more like a cackle to me. "It was too painful."
My fists clench at my sides as I try to keep my temper in check. This woman can't seriously think she's going to take Allie away from me now. Not after I've waited over seven years for her to return to me. "No, you gave up on her!"
"Jax," Noel says, but he stops when my glare shifts to him, letting him know I won't back down without a fight.
"I love Allie. I've never stopped loving her, and our house is exactly the way she left it. In fact, our house is the only thing she remembers. That's how she found me. I will not let you take her out of town and away from me. Not when I just got her back."
"We just got her back, too!" Karla shouts.
Allie looks around the room, and I can tell she's trying to put the pieces together. Even though she doesn't remember me or any of us, the way she looks right now is my Allie. Her personality is the same, and it makes me want to fall to my knees and thank God she's back.
"You're wearing a suit," Allie says.
"What?"
"You're wearing a suit. You were leaving when I showed up outside the house. Where were you going?"
The smirk her mother wears has me taking a few deep breaths to avoid punching the wall beside me. She will win this fight over my dead body.
"He was going to his engagement party, my dear," Karla says. "The one with another woman."
"You should probably go to that," Allie says, her head tilting. "You shouldn't skip that. What will your fiancée think? "
The words and disinterest with me being with someone else stabs me right in the heart, but I push it aside. "It doesn't matter. Not now that you're back, Allie."
"Jax, I don't remember you. I don't even remember me. And I certainly don't remember us. You seem to have moved on, which, seven years is a long time not to. I don't want to get in the way of that."
Yeah, like I'm marrying anyone but you, Allie, now that you're back. Forget it, baby, you're stuck with me.
"Things are different now. You being back changes everything. I can't let you go again. I just... I can't. The way things are now is not what our lives were supposed to be. We’re supposed to be together.” My voice cracks as I wrestle with the strength of my emotions. “I love you, Allie. I’ve always loved you. Those feelings never went away. Ever."
Detective Shields stops Karla from saying something, and she looks at Allie. "Allie, it's up to you who you want to leave with tomorrow. No one can make you do anything. It's your decision."
Looking at her, I try to plead with my eyes. If I thought it would help, I'd drop to my knees and beg her to choose me. I won't tell her she can't go with her mother, and I won't tell her that they don't get along and haven't since she was in high school. Even though I want her to know her mother's terrible to her, I need her to choose me because it's what her gut tells her.
Sure, I could tell her that Karla threatened to throw Allie out of the house when she learned we were having sex at seventeen. That she'd shown up to Allie's graduation drunk and barely functioning all because Allie decided to go to college near me. Or that she told everyone who would listen, specifically the media, that I had something to do with Allie's disappearance even though she was more than aware I was setting up a surprise proposal for Allie .
Her mother may not have had anything to do with what happened to her, but she sure as hell had a hand in making sure people thought I did. For years, I’ve lived under the suspicion that I was capable of doing something so terrible to the woman I love more than life itself. Karla’s a monster in a completely different way than whoever did this to Allie, and it would kill me to see Allie go home with her instead of me.
Allie looks between me and her mother, and it's clear she's unsure who she should pick. From her standpoint, the one where she knows nothing, I can't blame her if she decides to pick her parents. She doesn’t know anyone, but parents should be a safe bet. Though, the thought of losing Allie to her mother almost has me falling to my knees.
She didn't go to the police station. She came to our house. She came to me.
"You don't have a right to our daughter anymore, Jackson."
"I never gave up on her, Karla," I snap back.
Allie looks at her father. "What do you think?"
"I think," Noel says, avoiding his wife's gaze, "that I want you to come home with us. But it's your decision, Allie. You got yourself out, and you went to someplace that felt familiar. Whether you remember or not, you've always had really good instincts. I think…” Noel pauses for a beat, as if what he’s about to say physically pains him. “I think you should follow your gut."
The look of pure rage on Karla's face as she glares at her husband almost makes me laugh out loud. Karla wants a do-over with her daughter after their strained relationship came to light a few years ago. This would be her chance to have the mother-daughter bond she lied to everyone about. Plus, if Allie never remembers, she probably thinks she can create the perfect little replica of herself like she tried to make her daughter so many years ago.
"The house I grew up in... you don't live there anymore, right?" Allie asks.
Karla's mouth forms a tight line, and she shakes her head. "We moved away. It was too painful to stay here, sweetheart. Jax wants to paint us as monsters because we needed to start fresh even though he moved on and is marrying another woman."
Oh, you bitch. "I only moved on because everyone told me I had to. I never wanted to because Allie's the only one I've ever wanted. Even you told me to move on, Karla."
"There are probably going to be more questions that you'll have for me, right, Detective Shields?"
Parsons bristles at her blatant lack of his acknowledgement, and Shields tries not to smirk. "Yes, Allie."
"And the doctors treating me are here. But you guys don't live here anymore, right? You moved out of town?"
Noel nods. "Yes, sweetheart."
"Does someone else live in the house I grew up in?"
"Yes."
Sighing, she looks at me. "I want to remember who I am. Jax's house was familiar to me. The only thing familiar to me, and I think I need be where I feel I have the best chance to regain everything before the basement. Since I don't have a childhood home to go to, Jax's house seems to be the best option. As long as that's okay with Jax."
"Of course," I say and breathe a sigh of relief. "It's your house, Allie. Your name is on it with me."
"You can't be serious, Allie," Karla says. "We're your parents."
"And, Dad... do I call you Dad? Father? Or are we progressive and use your first name?"
Smirking, Noel nods. "You call me Dad. "
"Dad said I should trust my gut. My gut brought me to the house I apparently lived in before I was taken, and I think that's my ticket to remembering everything else. It's in town, which means it's easy for Detective Shields to reach me, and the doctors treating me are here. Moving away seems like a pretty big hassle for everyone involved."
Her mother scoffs and crosses her arms. "You're just as foolish as you've always been." Turning on her heel, she storms out of the room.
"Take care of her, Jax. I'm counting on you to make sure she's safe from whatever monster took her from us, you hear me?" Noel says.
His words confirm what I've always suspected. Her father never really believed I'd do anything to harm Allie, but he isn't the type to outwardly defy his wife. Not in front of others, anyway.
"I will, Noel. You know I'd die for her."
"Let's just hope it doesn't come to that. Do me a favor?"
I nod. "Anything."
"Pray for me. I'm going to need it."
I smirk and nod before looking at Allie. "You got it."
"I love you, sweetheart. I know you don't remember me, but I hope you can feel it's the truth."
She smiles. “I can, Dad. Good luck with Mom. Mother? Karla?"
"Mom," we tell her at the same time before he leaves.
"I'm not going to lie... that woman kind of scares me a little," Allie says.
"It's not an uncommon feeling, baby," I say, flopping into the chair by the bed and blowing out a shaky breath.
She's coming home to me. I'm not going to lose her. It's hard not to burst into tears right now, but I don't want to frighten her. This all feels like a weird dream.