Chapter 22 #2
But then he’s pulling on my hand, and we drift up the stairs, all the way to the attic.
Past the door is a large room reminiscent of one of those puzzle boxes that open once the right pieces are shifted.
The floors, the ceiling with the huge roof window, and all walls are lined with the same wood in many smudged shades of brown.
This place holds even more books than the living room, and several chairs and sofas would make for a perfect reading area, but Corvus’s true kingdom is past a doorway, in yet another space designed for easy cleanup.
Bundles of dried plants hang from the wall, and there’s all kinds of jars, organized by type and name.
If it wasn’t for the steel tables and modern lab equipment, I would have said the place looks like the lair of a witch.
I suppose, considering Corvus’s profession, it is as close as I can get.
“I know. A love potion,” I wiggle my eyebrows, then hug him because after today’s arguments, I’m eager to be close again.
His chuckle’s raspy, sweet yet has a bit of a bite, like honey with chili powder. Finally, I get my wish and push my nose into his smooth dark hair. The scent he carries already feels like home.
“I don’t think either of us needs one of those,” Corvus tells me and pulls out of my arms as I chew on the implications of what he just said.
He gravitates toward an antique cabinet with iron handles and retrieves something from the back of a shelf and presents me with a small rectangular bottle reminiscent of classic ladies’ perfume.
The glass is black, and the cap—in a silvery shade.
At the front is a label with the word Closer written in Corvus’s neat script.
“I was considering saving it for the wedding day, but it would be nice if you already smelled of it at the altar.”
“You… made a perfume for me?” I ask in disbelief, my heart pounding. I sure as fuck want to be closer right now.
Brief moments pass through my head, of Corvus giving me a pick of two scents several times in the past two weeks. Was that… part of his secret project?
He grins and places the bottle in my hands, but his touch lingers, warm and slightly damp with sweat. “Don’t worry if you don’t like it. I can always try another mixture, but this composition really brings you to mind. It’s fresh but so pleasant I could smell it every day.”
I know it will be my new favorite before I even open the bottle.
I lean in to smell it, but he pulls the container away with a chuckle.
“No, put it on your skin, because fragrance interacts with the oils on it. The same accord might smell differently on me than it does on you. And as it develops, you will get to learn all the different notes.” Corvus grabs my hand and spreads a little of the perfume over my wrist with his thumb.
I get goosebumps from this touch, but it’s the scent that really gets me emotional.
He put into it what he might have struggled with in words.
Every note in the perfume shows how he sees me as a person.
The first thing I smell is something tart—grapefruit?
—but underneath is a deep, herby base I find addictive.
It’s warm, inviting, like a sunrise enjoyed together under a warm blanket while the air is still cool.
Corvus might struggle expressing his emotions because of his upbringing and years in the closet, but he feels strongly. I can smell it.
It makes me more willing to open up to him instead of putting on the mask of a man I expect him to want.
“It’s beautiful. I… You know what I like in bed.
I’m big, brash, sometimes a bit too cocky for my own good, and that’s all most people see.
I’ve gotten so many gifts from my exes. Boxers, a set of cards, a Swiss army knife, a mug that says ‘Boss’, and even a cologne they liked.
But none of them was made for me. They were the kind of thing you give to a masculine man who acts and behaves in a certain way.
Because that was what they wanted from me.
To top, to provide, to protect, to fix things, but I can’t do all that. I always ended up disappointing them.
“I was too kind when they wanted a bastard, too violent for more than a fun ride, too horny to be serious, too dumb to make good money, but a smartass if I questioned them, annoyingly cryptic until I opened up and they didn’t like what they saw.
But you’re… letting me be myself. Thank you.
Like in this perfume. Like I’m allowed to be many things at once, and you see them all.
Like, yeah, maybe I do like beer and superheroes, but it doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate the flowers you put in the living room.
” I chuckle, embarrassed, and smell my wrist again.
“Sorry, I’m no deep thinker, it’s just… I want you to know it’s appreciated. ”
Corvus stares at me, lips opened ever so slightly as he leans in and inhales the perfume straight off my skin. “You might be a deeper thinker than you give yourself credit for. I think I did nail it. It’s just like you, with many ingredients that elevate each other.”
I kiss him when he meets my gaze, and we melt together in the middle of his workshop.
I still make sure to put the bottle away carefully, and I wouldn’t dare treat this space like I would a kitchen where I bent him over the counter.
The ingredients here are dangerous. So despite the need growing in me, I let our kiss be sweet as I wrap my arms around him, tangled in the scent he so thoughtfully composed for me.
It feels so perfect when he embraces me back, and for a moment we just stand in place, surrounded by the scent he always carries, and that of a perfume, tailor-made to express how he sees me.
“Even when you don’t completely fail people’s expectations, they become so heavy they choke you,” Corvus tells me and rubs his face against my collarbones. “It was reckless… how I chose to approach you, but I don’t regret it. I don’t even regret that Aspen filmed us.”
“Yeah? You wouldn’t have preferred me as the dirty secret in your basement?
” So maybe it’s needy, but we’ve already established that’s what I am.
I kiss the side of his head, and I already know the perfume will always remind me of this lovely moment of truth between us.
It’s almost uncanny how we got here after the painful confrontation earlier, but in this case I only care about the end result.
Corvus swallows. “That would have been the sensible thing to do. But maybe I’m less sensible than I always thought, because I want you in my bed, even though you could break my neck while I sleep.”
I hug him and start walking him out of the workshop with a smile. “The only thing I’m breaking in your bed is your headboard. You know, from all the banging?”
He laughs and rests his head on my shoulder. “I would have never guessed.”