Chapter 7
DOVE
Shit.
Shitshitshit!
The ground rushes up to meet me the second the front door slams closed and I grunt as the impact jolts through me like a slap.
Felix Donizetti.
In my living room.
After all these years.
This can’t be happening. I poured over everything to do with the Rossi family and they were small fry.
Smaller than small.
Someone like Felix should not be interacting with a family like that, never mind chasing up a car wreck that was nothing more than teenagers joyriding.
Despite the panic and the anxiety gripping my throat like an iron vice, something else bubbles just beneath the surface.
Warmth.
Felix is almost exactly like I remember him.
Well, not exactly.
He was taller. Stronger.
Much more handsome with the elegance of age written across his face in fine lines curving around the corners of his mouth and eyes.
Felix was always older than me but somehow it’s more apparent now.
He’s got more ink than I remember. Fifteen years ago, all he had was an arm sleeve.
Now there’s ink on his neck, and I can only imagine what else exists underneath that shirt.
And those eyes. Those striking, almond-shaped, warm-honey eyes.
They captured my heart the very first time I ever saw him and that warmth hasn’t changed.
Every second he stood in front of me was like no time at all had passed.
I was twenty again, sneaking out to romance the sexy enforcer from a rival family and enjoying every second of the rapid, hot romance that blossomed between us.
I loved him more than I’ve ever loved anyone.
And yet that man, the same man who helped me through nightmares, nursed me through a fever from an infected wound, flooded my car with rose petals and fucked the very breath out of me, that man betrayed me.
Now he knows where I live.
My carefully crafted lie of a life is unravelling right before my fingertips and there’s nothing I can do to stop it.
He knows I’m alive and if he knows, there’s no telling who else will find out as a result.
“Mom?”
Alex’s worried voice is like a slap to the face and it drags me right out of my panic. He stands over me with his brows twisted together and a kitchen knife in his hand.
“Alex! What are you doing with that?”
“You were scared, Mom. I was going to help you.”
“Oh honey.” Bracing myself on the couch, I climb to my feet and quickly take the knife from him. Then I pull him into a tight embrace. “I wasn’t scared. I was just… alarmed. And stressed.”
“Then why were you on the floor?”
“I slipped, that’s all.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes honey, I’m sure. You don’t need to protect me like that. That’s my job, you know?”
He hums in agreement against me. “Okay. Who was that man?”
The truth catches at the back of my throat and I pull back from him, gently cupping the side of his face where the bruises from the crash darken against his pale skin. “Just someone I haven’t seen in a long time.”
“A friend?”
“No,” I reply immediately. “Just… an acquaintance. He was just here to check if I could be privately booked for some event but I told him what I tell everyone. I only book through Mary.”
It’s unclear whether Alex believes me or not given how his frown doesn’t change, but he nods slowly anyway until another knock at the door interrupts us and my heart pounds back into my throat.
This time it is the pizza.
We eat it together on the sofa under a blanket while an animated movie plays on the screen, but I’m scarcely able to concentrate on the film or anything Alex tells me.
Felix lingers in my mind and remains there like a fever, consuming all of my thoughts even when I try to sleep.
By the time I make it to work the next day, I’m worth thin from worry and Felix’s face continues to plague my thoughts. Given that Felix knows where I live, leaving Alex home didn’t feel safe so I took him to work with me; much to Mary’s excitement.
“Alex!” she exclaims as he walks through the door. “Oh you poor boy, look at your handsome face! Oh goodness, you must be struggling.”
Alex’s cheek flushes red and while he shies away from her kiss, he does let her hug him as tightly as she can.
“I’m okay,” Alex mumbles, looking anywhere but at her. “The medicine is really strong.”
“Head on through to the back and get yourself something to eat,” Mary insists.
“You don’t mind him being here?” I ask while shrugging off my coat and hanging it up. “I didn’t want to leave him home alone again. And school is out of the question.”
“You never need a reason to bring him,” Mary beams at me, but after a moment her brows furrow. “What’s wrong, sweetheart?”
Coffee in hand, Mary and I step out into the back alley where trash piles up on one corner and the faint stink of piss lingers in the air.
Mary draws her shawl around her bony shoulders and studies me with a sharp eye. “Something happened.”
“Yeah.” I sigh deeply.
“Are you going on another date?”
“No, nothing like that. Well, maybe like that. Someone found me.”
Mary’s face falls. “Oh sweetheart.”
“This is… insane, actually. I don’t regret what I did but I left that life behind.
I’m not that person anymore. Hell, I moisturise and exfoliate, I buy anti-wrinkle cream and worry about taxes instead of spending my hours trying to get blood out of my clothes or training until my knuckles bleed or beating my time at gun disarmament.
This is… it’s all getting out of control. ”
Pacing away from her, I force a few deep breaths and Mary patiently waits for me to return to her side.
“Did I do the wrong thing?” I ask. “I didn’t see any other way but now…”
“No,” Mary says firmly. “Look. I don’t know much about the world you came from but what I do know is that your motherly instinct?
That’s the strongest gift you have. Protecting your family is what any mother does; you just had to use a…
rare form of protection to keep your son safe.
And that’s why you did it, isn’t it? To protect Alex? ”
I nod firmly.
“Then I know you have done the right thing and you will continue to do that as long as your heart stays true and focused.”
“Mary…”
“The person who found you, are they a danger?”
“I don’t know.” My cheeks puff out. “They were back then but I can’t tell now. I have to meet them.”
“When?”
“Tonight. Dinner.”
“I suppose it won’t be in a public place?”
“No,” I chuckle dryly. “It won’t be.”
“Will you be safe?”
My heart tightens. In all my years, no one has been more motherly to me than Mary has.
Even my own family barely knew anything about affection.
She barely knew me when she took me in and helped me work out what formulae to buy for Alex when my milk dried up, cheaper ways to deal with diaper rash and more, and then gave me a job and paid me long before I was able to leave Alex.
I want to tell her the truth but something stops me.
“Yes,” I lie. “I will be safe.”
“Good. Let me take care of Alex. You go and do what you need to do.”
Two hours after my shift ends, Alex goes home with Mary.
I return to my apartment and raid my closet for anything good enough to keep Felix subdued for the entire night.
A lot can change in fifteen years but just thinking of the way he looked at me when he was standing in my lounge is enough to send hot shivers down my arms.
In the end, I settle for a simple black dress that stops just above my knee, sheer stockings that rise up to my thigh and clip onto a garter, and burgundy heels the same shade as the dark lip I swipe across my mouth.
A couple of sparkling gems to complete the outfit and I’m happy.
Almost.
Standing in front of the mirror, I stare at myself for a few long minutes trying to work out what isn’t clicking.
Something is missing.
I adjust my boobs, twist both ways in the mirror and add a swipe of glitter across my eyelids, but something is still missing.
The hair.
My blonde wig slips from my head with three gentle tugs and my natural coppery-orange curls spill out around my shoulders.
Hiding my natural hair for fifteen years creates an odd sensation in my chest now that it frames my face in long waves and rests around my shoulders.
Perfect.
Phone in hand, I grab my bag and head outside to wait for my taxi but as I lock my door, the sound of a car door slamming catches my ear and I spin on the spot.
A man stands at the bottom of the steps with his hand outstretched for me to take. “Dove.”
Squinting, I study his square jaw hugged by a close-cropped beard, his twinkling blue eyes, and thinning brown hair while slowly walking down the steps.
Just as I reach his hand, it clicks in my mind like the snap of fingers.
“Toph?!”
“It’s really good to see you again,” Toph says gently, and there’s something hidden in his tone. A pain that strikes right at my heart.
“You still work for Felix?”
“Yes Ma’am.”
I take his hand and wince, letting him guide me down the last of the steps. “Don’t call me ma’am. Makes me feel old.”
“Growing old is a luxury for us,” Toph replies. “You should take it as a compliment.”
He’s right.
Despite my relationship with Felix being mostly a secret back when I was a teenager, Toph helped keep that secret.
He drove Felix to all of our secret rendezvous and even helped me escape a couple of tight situations.
Seeing him again is as surreal as seeing Felix.
“Toph, I—.”
“No need to explain.” He cuts me off immediately. “Felix sent me. He wanted me to pick you up like old times.”
“Old times?” I repeat as we reach the luxurious sedan. “Does he think that’s all it takes?”
“You know Felix,” Toph replies as he opens the door. “He’s a passionate, determined man.”
Obsessive is a better term.
If he’s going this far to stay in touch tabs on me already then my future becomes abundantly clear as I ease into the back seat.
If Felix refuses to let me go, I’ll just have to kill him.