Chapter 8
FELIX
Soft jazz drifts through the empty tables and chairs of La Lanterna, a quiet little Italian restaurant situated deep within a dark, rather intimidating alley.
It’s not found on any map due to the short nature of its lifespan when it was in full business under its last owner, but it remained a core spot for Dove and I when we were sneaking out.
Time and time again, coded text messages would result in one of us turning up here and waiting only twenty minutes for the other to appear.
After Nico and Dove’s deaths, this place was due to shut down, but I couldn’t bear to lose another thing I adored.
I became the new owner and this became a secluded space for me to spend time.
Now it’s back to its former restaurant glory with soft, low lighting from delicate candles flickering atop every table, deep red curtains pulled across the windows to keep out the world, soft jazz in the air, and the mouthwatering scent of pasta and garlic wafting from the kitchen.
It feels like home.
But not as much as watching Dove walk through that front door.
As soon as I catch sight of her, I’m utterly transfixed.
The years had turned Dove into a truly stunning woman.
Every curve is perfectly hugged in a strapless black dress that pours down her body like the caress of a shadow, her legs shimmer in the low light from stockings, miles of red waves caress her cheeks and neck, and the dark curve of her lips when she smiles politely at Toph is like an arrow to the heart.
I’m in love.
I never stopped being in love.
Even the anger at finding her alive, and the shock at seeing her living a completely different life isn’t enough to quell the flames I’ve held for her all these years.
“Thank you,” Dove says while Toph pulls out her chair for her and suddenly she’s seated in front of me before I even get a chance to stand and welcome her.
Great first impression, dickhead.
“Dove,” I say and her name weighs heavily on my tongue, like it’s been resting in the back of my throat for the past fifteen years.
“Let’s get straight to it,” she says briskly, adjusting herself in her seat and setting her silver bag to the side of her plate.
“Can I at least tell you how beautiful you look?”
She hesitates slightly, her lips parted just a fraction.
Warmth curls in my gut at the thought of kissing her and once that thought ignites, it doesn’t fade.
It’s like no time at all has passed between us even though we’re so clearly different people now.
“Fine,” she sighs. “Say what you want.”
A small lump forms at the roof of my throat and catches on the back of my tongue as I sift through a thousand things I want to say.
In the end, I settle for the truth.
“You look as beautiful as the last day I saw you.”
Dove’s light brows twitch faintly. “You remember that?”
“How could I ever forget? We were here. We shared a bottle of wine. I told you I was going to marry you and you told me that I was an incredible fool and we’d never get a chance to be that happy.”
Dove’s eyes fall to the napkins threaded through gold ribbon.
“A week later, you were dead.”
Tension ripples across her bare shoulders and her dark lips press into a firm line.
“And now you’re here. Sitting in front of me, fifteen years later and very much not dead. Turns out, I absolutely was a fool.” I fail to keep the bitterness from my voice as I speak.
Dove groans. “I need a drink.”
“Do you still drink red?”
She finally lifts her gaze and nods. “Occasionally.”
“Good. Chef is cooking up a Bolognese. Still your favorite, correct?”
Again, Dove nods. “Not much has changed about my food tastes.”
“Hard to pass up on a good Bolognese.”
“I haven’t had one since…” She trails off as Toph melts out of the low light around us and places two glasses of red wine on the table, then vanishes. “So you own this place now?”
“Yes. Saved it from administration not long after you died. Maybe we were the only two keeping it in business.”
Dove picks up her glass and raises it to her lips.
When she drinks, she tilts her head back slightly and my eyes wander down the soft, long length of her throat.
Each bob as she swallows sends a subtle thrill through my chest.
Even now, I can distantly recall exactly what her neck felt like against my palm.
“I don’t want to drag this out,” she says as he drains half her glass and sets it down. “So let’s be frank.”
“At least spend the entirety of the meal here,” I say as the doors to the kitchen swing open and the mouthwatering scent of tomato and garlic pours out like a river. “You owe me at least that.”
Her eyes narrow. “I don’t owe you anything.”
Anger ignites in my chest and I tense my jaw. “I’ve spent the past fifteen years mourning you. You owe me.”
“You should have moved on.”
“Like you did?” A sharp scoff escapes me. “A new life. New man. A fucking kid.”
Dove flinches ever so slightly and her eyes narrow as the food is placed in front of us, then the chef scurries away back to the kitchen.
Steam rises between us, softening her glare as much as it softens the anger in my heart. Finally, she sighs.
“I didn’t die. Obviously. I went into hiding.”
So we’re jumping right into it? Fine.
Picking up my fork, I stab at my spaghetti. “Why?”
“Are you kidding me? My entire family was massacred, Felix. Did you expect me to wait around to be next? Just line myself up like a target? No.”
Even as I eat, I can’t take my eyes off her. I scarcely blink as if that half-second in darkness will make me miss something. “What happened?”
“That night?”
I nod. “No one knows the details. I want to know what happened.”
“No one knows?” Her eyes narrow and then dip to her plate. “It’s in the past. I don’t want to drag up something I can’t change.”
Irritation swells over my next bite but rather than push it, I accept her answer with a nod.
“Well, I’m sorry, Dove. I’m so sorry about what happened.
And I’m sorry I wasn’t there. I was so… so fucked up after Nico’s death that I drank myself into a fucking stupor and when I dragged myself out of it a few days later, I learned your family had been slaughtered and everyone was dead. You included.”
Her hand pauses on the way to her mouth and something glints in her eyes, an emotion I can’t quite place.
“A few… days later?” she repeats.
I nod. “I’m ashamed to admit how Nico’s death affected me.
As you know, he was my best friend since childhood.
You knew him. He was a good, kind man. He was strong.
Stronger than me. It rocked my world that someone could kill him, and then a few days later, I learned you were dead and…
” I shake my head. No need to bring up how badly I wanted to join them.
Dove shifts in her seat and eats slowly. “I did what I had to do.”
“You left,” I mutter, unable to stop the jealousy rising. “You went and had another family.”
“It’s not like that.”
“Isn’t it?” I glance down at her hands and note a shadow of a bruise around her wrist. “No ring? Does your husband know you take it off when you go to meet an ex?”
Her eyes dart up to mine with the sharp, angry glare I’ve missed so damn much. “First of all, I would never do something like that. Second of all, I’m not married so there’s no husband to tell that I’m meeting an ex.”
“But there is a father,” I point out. “Is that why you changed your name? Dove James.” I scoff softly. “Hardly Dove Healy, is it?”
“No father,” she replies stiffly. “Dead. Keeping it on theme, wouldn’t you say?”
I smirk. “Dead after you married?”
“No marriage,” Dove insists. “If you must know, I changed my name to hide. Surely you can work that out.”
I can. I just needed to confirm there really was no other man in her life.
“Why stay in New York?”
She pauses her next mouthful. “It was easy. And I know how this world works. Someone goes missing, I know the protocol. My family were—.” Her voice breaks slightly and she clears her throat after a mouthful of wine.
“I knew their bodies were mutilated enough that I’d be assumed dead with them.
Staying close to the fire was the only way to keep myself hidden, not that anyone would be looking. ”
“You always were smarter than me.”
“Wasn’t hard,” Dove replies quickly and an almost smile tugs at her lips.
“Why didn’t you call me? Why didn’t you reach out to me? I could have helped you, Dove. You know I would have done anything for you.” I still would.
She finishes her last bite, chewing thoughtfully as if overwhelmed by answers and then she sighs. “After what happened… I wanted out. A clean break. I didn’t want to look over my shoulder, I didn’t want any more blood on my hands. I wanted to escape and grieve and leave it all behind.”
“And have a baby. Alex.” The bitterness rises one more.
“Alex wasn’t planned,” Dove admits softly. “But he’s the most important thing in my life.” Her gorgeous eyes lock onto mine. “So think very carefully before you mention him again.”
An open threat.
Interesting.
The Dove I knew was much more cloaked and secretive when it came to threatening people.
She enjoyed the thrill of espionage but now she’s openly telling me she’ll cut my balls off if I talk about her son again.
Hot.
“Is that why you killed the Rossi Don?”
“I didn’t kill him,” Dove replies without missing a beat. “I didn’t even know he was dead.”
“But you knew of him?”
“Of course I did. My son stole a car, and I looked into where he stole the car from after some bullshit cop interrogated me and threatened me in the hospital.”
Anger suddenly surges inside me at the very thought of someone daring to put their hand on her. “Did he do that?” I ask, nodding to the bruise on her wrist.
She glances down and nods. “I left that life behind but that doesn’t stop me from being educated. It’s how I stay alive.” She sips her wine. “He threatened and I listened, but he never came back. If that Rossi bastard is dead then look for the cop.”
If it were any other person sitting in front of me, I’d maybe believe them.
Not Dove.
Just saying Alex’s name got me a warning so it’s not hard to imagine what she would do to someone who actively threatened her and her son.
She’s one of the most skilled people I know and I doubt fifteen years would do much to dull that.
“I’ll look for the cop,” I say, feigning belief. “Did you enjoy the meal?”
She glances down at her empty plate, then lifts her hand to her mouth and very slowly swipes it along her lower lip as if catching any stray sauce. “I did.”
“And the wine?”
“Are you looking for a thank you?” Her eyes meet mine. “You gave me a meal, I gave you an explanation. We’re even.”
We’re far from even.
There’s nothing in the world that will make me back down now.
“I missed you, Dove.”
“It’s been fifteen years. Don’t you have some other hot thing warming your bed now?”
“No. Not since you.”
Her eyes widen ever so slightly in surprise. “You’re not serious.”
“I am.”
“Bullshit. A hot man like you? The position of power you’re in? I’m not buying that for a second.”
Caterina briefly enters my mind and I wince, then shake my head. “I’m not denying there’s been interest over the years or flings to scratch an itch. But my heart has always belonged to you.”
She rolls her eyes, and the corner of her lips twitches. “You’re such a bullshitter.”
“It’s the God’s honest truth. You’re an impossible woman to follow.”
“After fifteen years, we’re not even the same people. I came here out of respect for old times.”
“And to protect your son,” I add with a light smile.
She gently rolls her eyes again. “And to protect my son. That’s it.”
She’s softening.
Maybe it’s the wine or the food, or even my company but she’s softening.
The armor’s peeling away piece by piece and the old Dove still exists underneath. She wouldn’t be here if she didn’t have some kind of feelings for me.
Dove would have taken her son and run. I don’t doubt that at all.
“You’ve no idea how deeply in love with you I was, do you?” I say softly, leaning into the table. “I worshipped the ground you walked on.”
“You were like a puppy,” she mutters good-naturedly.
“You loved it. And I’ve grown. I’m not a puppy anymore.”
Dove eyes me over the edge of her glass. “What are you then?”
“I’m not going to say a wolf,” I reply with a grin. “But signs are there.”
“A wolf?” Dove finally cracks and a real, soft laugh escapes her. “You’re ridiculous.”
“You know it’s true.”
“Do I know that?” She blinks slowly and sighs. “Look, Felix—.”
“Dance with me.” I cut in before she dares bring this night to an end.
“Excuse me?” Wide, beautiful eyes gaze at me across the table.
“Dance with me. One last time. For old times' sake. Dance with me like we used to. And then… then I promise I’ll leave you to your new life.”