Chapter 28
Ryker
There’s a deafening silence in the car as I take Ash from the warehouse straight to my apartment. We both have things on our minds that are tormenting us and swirling around.
Something has been going on between us lately. All the things we haven’t talked about are becoming like a wall that’s driving us apart. I fucking hate it. It’s suffocating me, and I know we need to have a serious talk.
We enter the house, and I head straight for the table with several bottles on it.
“What are you poisoning yourself with today?” I ask without looking at my girl.
“Whatever will do.”
I laugh because she’s absolutely right. On days like this, it doesn’t matter what numbs you, as long as it works and clears your head.
I take two glasses and some tequila, which isn’t usually my first choice. Before sitting down opposite her on the couch, I pour us each a drink.
Looking straight into her mesmerizing eyes, I down my shot, and when she does the same, I pour us another round.
“I have to tell you something, Ryker,” Ash starts.
“We both have something to say, my Little Killer. I’m sorry I didn’t mention earlier that your father contacted me.”
“You wanted to get him without me?”
My head jerks back like she’d just slapped me. “No. It’s not that. I didn’t know what to expect from him, and if he turned out to be a worthless piece of shit, I didn’t want him to break your heart again.”
Ash slumps back but doesn’t break eye contact. “He didn’t break my heart.”
“Bullshit. Every father who’s absent from his daughter’s life is the first man to break her heart. You were no exception, even if you don’t want to admit it out loud.”
Avoiding eye contact, she falls into thought. Shadow or Ash, it doesn’t matter; she’s a damn tough woman. I love that about her. Except that inside, she’s still a little girl who has been hurt by life and people.
“I wanted to protect you,” I add, and her gaze returns to me. It’s not a kind expression at all.
“What now? Do you guys breathe this stuff in the air? That’s all I need—a man in my life who knows better and will protect me like a porcelain doll. What’s wrong with you people?”
Ash’s outburst is perfectly understandable. One sentence is enough to make her nerves slip, her eyes soften, shoulders drop. Her hands tremble slightly.
“We care.”
She hisses, drawing in air. It wasn’t what she’d expected to hear from me.
“I’m sorry I doubted you,” she confesses after a moment. “Everything—it started the day I was attacked.”
Yes, I know. I saw the subtle change in her behavior, even though she tried to hide it from me.
“That evening, someone called me. It was a woman. She said—she said her name was Aisling Elliot.”
My heart stops, and then I jump to my feet. The invisible knife lodged in my gut is razor sharp.
Looking at the woman who lives rent-free in my head and heart, I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Betrayal is the only word echoing in my head.
“How could you not tell me!” I yell, and she jumps up too.
“Let me explain! She doesn’t want you to find her. She said everything that happened to her is because of you!”
“Of course it’s because of me!” The urge to clench my fingers around this woman’s neck is overwhelming, and to stop myself, I grab my hair. Jesus Christ. My sister... “I told you the same thing, that it’s my fault! Mine. Because of me, my father took her away.”
“That’s not the point! She insinuated—I don’t know. She said it as if you were directly to blame, not your father. I didn’t believe it. But she knew my father had contacted you and predicted you wouldn’t tell me.”
With pain, my eyes close. I can’t help it.
My sister? How could she know all this?
It doesn’t make sense, absolutely no sense. And why on earth does she doubt that I’m on her side? Meanwhile, every single day, I’m ready to tear the world apart for her, burn everything down and rebuild it just to find her.
“Ryker—”
I raise my hand to stop her from speaking for a moment. I try to put all the pieces together.
“She made you doubt me. And I didn’t help when I didn’t tell you the whole truth right away.”
Ash sighs and looks at me with sadness in her eyes.
I’m not mistaken.
“I’m sorry,” she says gently. “For God’s sake, I really didn’t know what to think about all this. I just can’t understand why you’re the bad guy in her eyes. It doesn’t make sense.”
“I know. Maybe it’s all another game, manipulation on my father’s part. I have no idea what he could have told her about me, what image he could have painted of me.”
“You’re right. When she said that everything that happened to her was your fault, I felt like she was stabbing me with a knife because... It’s clear how much you’re hurting because she isn’t here.”
What I’m feeling right now... Words fail me. “I’m sorry, Ash, for my outburst. It’s just—I’ve been looking for her for so fucking long. I can’t believe you heard her voice.”
It wasn’t anger at her. It was anger at myself. But she couldn’t have known that.
I down another shot of tequila. The pleasant burning sensation distracts my thoughts for a moment.
“I’m sorry, Ryker. Maybe it wasn’t even her? I wouldn’t know. It could have been a stupid prank.”
That’s possible. Another mystery I can’t solve right now.
We sit down again. “My father is a son of a bitch. No means is too dirty for him to achieve his goals. This could be another one of his games. And now you’re in danger because of me.”
“What do you mean?”
“That morning when I came to you—I’d been to James’s place earlier.
It was because of him you were attacked, but it was a warning to me.
At the gala, he realized how much you mean to me.
It was my mistake because I forget about the universe when I’m with you.
And he sensed it and saw it. It didn’t take him long to connect the dots and realize you’re my weakness, one that he could use against me.
He sent me a picture of that bastard with his hands around your delicate neck. ”
Ash doesn’t say a word, listening.
“I had a knife to his throat when the tables turned. He played a recording full of Aisling’s screams. A few years ago, she got away from his watch and two months ago, she was seen in Paris.
She was on a flight to New Orleans, and her current whereabouts are unknown.
It’s possible she’s free, but it’s also conceivable that my father has her back under his control. The risk—”
“It’s too big,” Ash finishes my thought.
“Yeah. I blew up his weapons warehouse and burned down his drug warehouse. He surely grasped that regarding you, I’m utterly merciless. But—he gave me a week to deliver your father to the red room. He put Aisling’s life and yours on the line. Now do you understand?”
She confirms with a nod.
I get up and move my ass to the same couch she’s sitting on. Now I can see her determination up close, but not fear.
My hands cup her face, and my thumbs stroke her cheeks. They’re so soft. “I can’t lose you too,” I whisper. “I’ll never forgive myself if—”
With a twinkle in her eye, she interrupts me. “Nothing will happen to me, my love. I promise you. That’s why you gave my father a week to hide.”
“Truthfully, my plan was to turn him over to the client. I didn’t want to take any chances, but when you were talking in the warehouse, I realized I couldn’t do it.
The thought of taking him away from you again is unbearable.
” Jesus. I’m crazy about this woman, though she doesn’t know how much yet.
“I’ll protect you, baby, or I’ll die trying. I won’t let anyone hurt you.”
“We’ll find a way out, Ryker.”
Looking at this woman’s face, this stunning woman, I wonder how the hell I could be so lucky.
I don’t deserve her, but that won’t stop me from making her mine.
“You need to know, Ash, that I’m done for.
From the moment I first saw you, I was completely smitten.
Now I’m totally and irrevocably in love with you. ”
A small smile appears on her face. “That’s good.” Her sparkling eyes stare into mine.
“Why?”
“Because it just so happens that I’ve fallen in love with you too.”
Isn’t this when a man kisses a woman? The moment she curls her toes?
I’ve never considered myself romantic, but I recognize that this is the perfect moment to show this side of me.
My lips find hers in a second. It’s like I can’t live without it. And that’s the truth. I can’t imagine a day without this woman by my side.
“I’ve been thinking a lot lately, and—” Theo breaks the silence. “I have to take care of something first. It’s about my stepmother. And I’d like to talk to you about it, Ryker, but not here and not without a drink in my hand.”
We’re at Feather. A week after meeting Charles Baker.
We have privacy in my office, but Theo still doesn’t feel comfortable.
“Is everything okay with Amanda?”
He shifts again in the chair. It’s clear to me it’s not the chair that’s uncomfortable, but the subject.
“Yes, everything’s going well. Listen, Ryker, the thing is—”
Bang!
My office door slams against the wall.
I look up in rage. What a fucking day!
“Would you kindly stop slamming that door every time you walk into my office? Soon I’ll have to call someone to fix the hole in the wall. What’s wrong with you?”
Eli walks in with his trademark smile. He looks at the door as if he’s seeing it for the first time in his life, then grabs the handle and slams it shut behind him.
I roll my eyes. The guy is beyond redemption.
“We’ve got that son of a bitch!” he yells and throws his fist in the air.
I lean back in my chair. It’s official. He’s lost what little sanity he had left. “We’ve got who?”
“James Elliot, also known as your biological father.” In two steps, he’s next to us and takes the chair to Theo’s left. His gaze jumps from me to Theo and back again. “Am I interrupting something, ladies?”
“Fuck off,” Theo snaps.
“Nice to see you, by the way, my friend,” Eli adds.
“Focus,” I snap. “What do you mean, we have James?”