10. Tabitha
10
TABITHA
"W ell, what did you think?"
"It was even better than I expected," I answered with a smile. “Both the ride and the springs.”
“Good. Glad you enjoyed it.”
Hudson smiled at me in a way that made me think he knew exactly how much I’d enjoyed myself. And he wasn’t wrong. The ride had been everything I’d hoped it would be and more. I loved the feeling of the wind whipping through my hair, the warmth of the sun on my face, and the sheer freedom of it all. I hadn’t realized how much I’d needed a day like this.
“It was perfect.” I pulled my feet from the springs and reached for my shoes. “So, where are we headed now?”
“I thought we’d grab a bite to eat, then head back.”
He held out a hand, and I hesitated only for a second before slipping mine into his. His grip was strong and comforting as he helped me to my feet. I felt an unspoken promise in it. No rush. No pressure. Justhim and me, and I liked it more than I expected.
“You have a place in mind?”
“There’s a little diner a couple of miles from here. Nothing fancy, but it’s got the best burgers in town.”
“That sounds perfect.”
I meant it.
A simple, little diner and a good burger sounded perfect.
We walked back to his bike, and after I slipped on my helmet, I climbed on behind him. It felt oddly comfortable as I wrapped my arms around his waist. The ride had changed something. I felt more at ease, and I wasn’t so worried about doing or saying something wrong.
The engine roared to life, and seconds later, we were pulling out of the park and headed to our next destination.
The ride to the diner was just as much fun as the ride to Hot Springs, if not more so. It was a little cooler. The wind had picked up, and the sun had started to set. And this time, I wasn’t quite as nervous, and I found myself leaning into Hudson and holding onto him a little tighter.
It felt good to be so close to him, which surprised me.
I usually wasn’t so comfortable around men, especially ones as powerful as Hudson. But he had this way of making me feel at ease, safe even. And I liked it. I liked it more than I cared to admit.
I was almost disappointed when we pulled up to the diner. It was a small, rustic place with worn leather booths and checkered floors. The scent of fried food and fresh coffee lingered in the air, and I had no doubt that it was a hot spot with the locals. I couldn’t imagine a better spot to have dinner with Hudson.
He led me to the back, and we settled into a quiet booth in the corner. It wasn't long before a waitress came over and took our order. She was in her late fifties with kind eyes and a knowing smirk. Hudson told her we wanted two burgers, fries, and a couple of sweet teas. She nodded, and as soon as she walked away, Hudson’s eyes settled on me.
I could tell by the way he was looking at me that he had something on his mind. He cocked his brow as he said, “So, tell me about yourself.”
“Like you don’t already know all there is to know about me.” I cocked my brow. “I’ve been around long enough to know how men like you work.”
He leaned back in his seat, and his lips twitched with amusement as he asked, “And what exactly do you think you know about men like me?”
“I know you don’t walk into anything blind. So, you’ve had your men dig up whatever they could about me and the boys long before you ever laid eyes on us.” I shifted in my seat before adding, “So, what is it that you really want to know?”
Hudson’s dark eyes stayed locked on mine, and for a moment, I thought he might try to change the subject. Instead, he leaned forward and admitted, “I know the basics. I know your family struggled, and your mother was sick. I know you married Dimitri right before she died. And I know you had three boys. But that’s just facts on paper. I want to knowthe rest . ”
The rest wasn’t exactly easy to talk about.
I’d tried to put my past behind me, but it had this nasty habit of sneaking up on me. I shrugged and tried to sound nonchalant as I said, “Dimitri was difficult. He was very controlling and wanted things his way, and I learned to make sure he got it, which wasn’t always easy.”
“I can imagine, especially at your age.”
“You saw that, huh?”
“I did.” He gave me a slight grimace. “I’m sure that was tough.”
“You could say that.” I hated that he knew that about me. It was something I didn’t share with anyone. Partly out of embarrassment and partly because it wasn’t a choice I would’ve made for myself. But it was out there. He knew all about it, so there was no sense in trying to avoid it. “I hadn’t even had a boyfriend, and I was suddenly married to a man twice my age.”
“So, this wasn’t something you wanted?”
“God, no,” I scoffed. “But I didn’t have a choice in the matter.”
“Sounds like there’s a story there.”
“There is, but let’s save it for another day.”
“Fair enough.” He studied me for a moment, then asked, “What about you and your boys? Are you guys close?”
“As close as we can be,” I admitted. “They are my whole world. Sergei’s my firstborn, and it shows. He’s eager to please, but he has a lot of his father in him and can be stubborn at times. Viktor is more reserved, but in a good way. He has a kind soul. And Nikolai is the youngest and has the biggest heart, but at times, he’s the hardest to reach. But I get it. I can be hard to reach, too.”
“We all can.”
“I guess so.” I didn’t want the conversation to be all about me , s o I asked, “What about you and your boys?”
“Memphis is my oldest. He’s stubborn as hell, but he’s got a good head on his shoulders. And Beckett was…” He stopped and exhaled a deep breath. “I lost him a while back, and I’m still trying to make sense of it all.”
“I’m so sorry.”
Hudson gave a small nod, brushing off the pain as he added, “It’s a story for another day.”
I had no idea what had happened, but I could tell by the expression on his face that the death of his son had hit him hard. The last thing I wanted to do was cause him anymore pain, so I nodded and said, “Another day.”
The waitress returned with our food and drinks. She placed everything on the table, then gave Hudson a flirty smile before rushing back to the kitchen. Hudson reached for his burger as he asked, “Are we done with the heavy stuff?”
“Umm, I might be mistaken, but I do believe you were the one who started it with the heavy stuff.”
“Maybe, but I’ve had enough for one night. How about you?”
“Yes, I’m good.”
“Good. Now, dig in.” He motioned his head towards my plate. “It’ll be the best burger you’ve ever had.”
I picked up my burger and took a bite, and just like he’d promised, it was amazing. “Wow.”
“See. I told ya.”
“I’m glad to see you’re a man of your word.”
“That I am.”
“So, tell me, Hudson… what does a man of his word motorcycle president do for fun?”
“Well, at the moment, he’s having dinner with a beautiful woman.”
“And you’re having fun?”
“Absolutely.”
“Good. I am, too.”
He cocked his brow. “You sound surprised.”
“I might be a little.” I could tell by his expression that he didn’t know how to take what I’d said, so I added, “Not because of you. It’s me. All me.”
“Um-hmm.”
“I’m serious. I can’t remember the last time I really had fun.” I shrugged. “I didn’t think I had it in me anymore.”
“I think you’ve got a lot of fun left in you.”
“You think?”
“You wouldn’t be sitting here with me if you didn’t.”
“So, there’s hope for me yet.”
“Oh, absolutely, and I’ll prove it to ya.”
“And how do you plan to do that?”
“I’m thinking we’ll take a different route home.” A smirk slipped across his handsome face as he said, “One with a few more curves, and if you’re up for it, one more quick stop.”
“Yeah, I’m up for it.”
The words came out before I had a chance to really think about what I was saying—which was a good thing. If I’d really thought about it, I might’ve told him no, and I would’ve missed out on a wild ride home. He’d taken the back road, and it curved and dipped like it had a mind of its own. And he didn’t hold back with the speed. There were times when we were flying.
I had a feeling he did quite often, and he did it without thinking like he knew every inch of the pavement. He picked up speed on one of the long curves, not enough to be reckless, just enough to make my breath catch and my hand reach for the edge of the seat.
But I wasn’t scared.
Not even a little.
It was a strange thing to feel safe while going fast, but that’s exactly how it felt with him. There was a sense of trust there that made no sense to me, but I knew he was in control and wouldn’t let anything happen to me. When we came up to a red light, he placed his hand on my calf and asked, “You good?”
I nodded, and when the light turned, we were off again.
We weren’t far from home when he slowed down and turned into the city park. The lights were on, and there were two teams out on the baseball field. They were middle school age, and they looked to be playing one hell of a game. The score was tied, 6 to 6, and the coaches were shouting out plays like they were in the middle of the World Series.
We parked, and after removing our helmets, we made our way over to the fence. It wasn’t long before a couple of the outfielders spotted us, and a couple of them shouted, “Hey, Coach G!”
Hudson lifted his hand and gave them a small wave, then motioned at them to keep their focus on the game. There was a big hit, and the outfielders started hustling for the ball. When one of them caught it, Hudson started clapping, “Heck yeah! Good catch, Pete!”
He tossed the ball back to the pitcher, and right as he was preparing to make the throw, Hudson shouted, “James! Square up your feet.”
The pitcher shifted his gate and then threw the ball. The batter swung and missed. The boys continued to play, and every now and then, Hudson would call out to the boys, giving them advice or congratulating them. I was quickly learning that there were many layers to the MC president.
I had no idea how long I’d been staring at him when he chuckled and asked, “What?”
“You’re a coach?”
“Part-time, but yeah.”
“How’d that happen?”
“Got roped into it a few years ago when one of the brother’s kids was playing. He found out I used to play and was pretty good, and one thing led to another.” He shrugged with a sexy smile. “Figured I could do worse with my time.”
He was trying to play it off like it was no big deal, but I saw the way he watched those boys. He looked at them like he not only knew their name but every detail of their story. It clearly meant more to him than he let on. I smiled as I told him, “I think it’s great that you help out like you do. I’m sure the kids love you.”
“I don’t know if I’d go that far.”
He chuckled, and we turned our attention back to the field. It was the last inning, and the pitcher was on fire. He was throwing strike after strike, and when he threw the last player out, the team erupted in cheers.
He glanced over to me with an excited look on his face and asked, “Do you mind?”
There was no way I was going to keep him from those boys, so I quickly nodded and said, “Go! I’ll wait right here.”
He held my gaze for a moment, then jogged out onto the field. Several of the boys ran up to him, each giving him a high five or a fist bump. He spoke to each of them, and they listened to every word.
I found the whole scene both surprising and heartwarming.
As I stood there watching him with his boys, it hit me. I liked him. I really, really liked him, and I had no idea what I was going to do about it.
Once he’d finished up with them, we got back on the bike, and he drove me home. He walked me up to the barn entrance, and we lingered there for a moment. The night air was cool against my skin, but I barely noticed it. Not with him standing this close and looking at me the way he was.
I wasn’t ready for this.
I knew that.
I could feel it in my bones. I should’ve said something. I should’ve done something to break the spell before it swallowed me whole.
But I didn’t.
Instead, I stared into those beautiful dark eyes as he lifted his hand and gently brushed his fingers along my jaw. A move that seemed much too gentle for a man like him. He inched closer, and my breath caught. My entire body tingled with anticipation.
And then it happened.
He kissed me.
It wasn’t rushed. It wasn’t demanding. It was slow and deliberate, like he was giving me time to pull away if I wanted to. But I didn’t pull away. Instead, I leaned into him, kissing him back.
And just like that, the world around us faded into the night. It was just him and me. My pulse roared in my ears as his lips moved against mine. Coaxing. Unraveling. His other hand slid to my waist. He was firm but careful, holding me there like he wasn’t going to let me go.
Heat stirred in the pit of my stomach. It was a feeling I barely recognized. It was one I’d buried a long time ago, and now, it was waking up all at once.
I wanted this.
I wanted him.
But then reality crashed through the haze.
I placed the palms of my hands on his chest and gave him a slight push, breaking the embrace. “I can’t.”
“Can’t what?”
“This,” I muttered, shaking my head. “I don’t know how to do this.”
Hudson didn’t move. He didn’t push. He just stood there staring at me with an unreadable expression. “ Tabitha…”
“I mean it.” I tried to swallow the lump in my throat, but it didn’t budge. “I don’t know how to be with someone. I mean, r eally be with them. Not like this.”
The words tasted bitter as I said them, but that didn’t make them any less true. Dimitri was a man who took. He took, and he took. And he had no remorse when he took everything from me. He stole the last years of my childhood, my free will, my virginity, and my voice.
He left me with nothing, and I had learned to survive it.
But this wasn’t about survival. This was something else, and I had no idea how to handle it. Hudson’s jaw tensed, but after a long moment, he gave a slow nod.
He didn’t try to push back.
He didn’t try to convince me that I was wrong.
He just let me go.
And somehow, that made it even harder to watch him walk away.