Chapter Sixteen
Raider
The one thing about Anastasia is that, while she might hide her feelings and emotions from the world, but for me, I’ve always been able to read every single one in her eyes. If you look closely enough or pay attention, it’s always there giving it all away.
“Words, Tasia,” I growl, leaning close. “The next time I have to remind you to give me the words, I’ll be pulling you over my legs and spanking your ass.”
Her eyes widen, and the anxiety fades, making way for the fire of need I’ve come to crave in such a short amount of time.
I tighten my grip on her, just slightly tilting her head back, giving me access to the column of her throat.
I try, I truly try to fight the need to taste her on my tongue, but like a weak man I lose the fight.
I flick my tongue out, running it up the column of her throat. She sucks in sharply, not breathing.
“Do you understand me?” I demand in her ear, applying more pressure to the hold I have on her hair.
“I understand.” Her words escape her in a whisper as she places a hand on my shoulder.
“Good. Now tell me what has you so fucking freaked out?”
“It’s Monday.”
“I’m aware it is Monday, Tasia. Why does that have you losing your shit?” I know I sound impatient, but I can’t help it.
“Rusher has practice today, and I don’t know if he made it there.
I don’t know if he has what he needs because I haven’t even thought about what was at the house when it went up in flames.
I don’t have a way to talk to him. I don’t know anything about my boy—” she rambles until I gently place my lips on hers, stopping her.
The kiss was meant to be sweet and gentle, just enough to further center her.
What it turned into was me dominating her mouth, demanding more.
The clearing of a throat and a laugh from behind me cause Anastasia to pull away with the sexist fucking blush spreading across her cheeks and down her neck.
Damn it, I want to know how far that blush really goes.
I put some space between us before I lay her out and do exactly that, not giving a damn who is in the room.
“To answer all your current questions, Rusher is at practice. We got everything he needed over the weekend. When you’ve had some rest and feel up to it, we will go over to Auntie Lynn’s and see what it looks like.
” I tell her, watching with a satisfaction I didn’t know possible as the stress bleeds from her face and eyes.
“Thank you, Raider. You have no idea what that means to us. We can talk about what I owe you for his stuff,” she whispers, a tear sliding out of the corner of her eye.
Her words hit me like a slap in the face. I drop my hold and stand from the bed, rage boiling through my veins, lighting me on fire. “Are you fucking serious? You think I did all that so you could fucking pay me back?”
Her face goes hard. “A man only does something nice for one of two things.”
I turn and storm to the door. “Finishing that statement would not be in your best interest. I’ve got shit to handle today.”
She calls my name, but I know going back to her or stopping would mean someone says something they don’t mean, and right now, that is not what either one of us needs.
I slam through the door just as Hermes is coming down the hallway holding Anastasia’s new phone.
I stop walking and wait for him to get to me.
“Here is her phone. Sorry it took so long. With us down the prospects, I didn’t have anyone to go get it. All she has to do is log into the account and it’s good to go, same number and everything,” he says in his always flat tone.
“Thanks, brother. I’ll take it to her,” I tell him. “Also, can you send out a message that I want everyone here for church in an hour?”
“I will,” he turns, leaving with no other fanfare.
I take a deep breath, working to settle my volatile emotions before going back into my room.
Turning, I slowly make my way back to the door, silently opening it, but stop when something catches my attention.
What I hear as I stand there makes some things click into place and, at the same time, makes me want to tear the world down.
“What do you mean you don’t know if you can get past what he did to your sister?” Charlie questions her, sounding confused.
“He told her to get rid of the baby. He wanted nothing to do with either of them,” Anastasia tells her, anger lacing her words.
Both Charlie and Ainsley gasp in shock.
“I’m sorry, but that’s complete bullshit,” Ainsley finally snaps, shaking her head.
Anastasia watches her, looking more and more pissed off.
“I don’t know what to believe. What I do know is that when she came to me after telling him she was pregnant and it was his baby, she told me he said to get rid of it or he would get rid of her.
That he would use his connections to the motorcycle club and cartel to make it happen. ”
“Can I ask you two questions?” Charlie asks.
Anastasia just shrugs, not saying anything.
“First, you tell us you’ve known Raider since you guys were children.” Charlie waits for her response. When she just nods at her, Charlie continues, “Did you ever truly believe he would act like that or tell someone to get rid of his kid?”
Anastasia looks up, locking eyes with me. The pain there—raw, unfiltered, devastating—hits me like a blow. My knees nearly buckle under the weight of it. We just sit there, staring at each other, until she finally speaks, and in that moment, everything I ever believed about her shatters.
“I never truly believed he would say that. Or treat her that way,” she begins, her voice trembling.
“But when she told me she was pregnant, I realized she had finally taken the one person I thought truly loved me. She took him and made sure he would always be hers. I was shattered. I believed she truly was in danger … but from whom, I don’t know.
That danger is what gave me the strength to walk away. ”
She looks away then, wiping tears off her face with the sleeve of my hoodie.
I choose that moment to clear my throat, letting the others know I’m standing in the doorway. “Hermes brought me your phone. He was able to get your phone number. He said when you log into your account, if your old phone was backed up, then you should have everything you need.”
Anastasia refuses to look at me when I bring it over to her. The need to have her eyes on me when I’m around has crawled under my skin and taken root. Reaching out, I hook my index finger under her chin, turning her face so I can see her eyes.
“We’ve got a lot to untangle and talk about,” I murmur, my chest tight. “But know this, I was never hers. Not then. Not fucking ever.”
She doesn’t say anything, just looks at me in pure shock.
I place a lingering kiss on her forehead before turning and nodding to the other ladies as I leave the room, closing the door softly behind me.
The further we get into all the shit with Relic, Jenny, Shea, and the fucking Cartel, there is so fucking much we don’t know.
Every time I believe we’re finally seeing all the pieces and shit is making sense, something else blows up in my face.
As I make it to my office, Hermes is standing there with a tablet in hand and looking pissed.
That does not bode well for anyone. Hermes is the most levelheaded and unshakeable of all of us.
He came to the club when he was sixteen, looking for a place to stay.
His childhood, unlike most of ours, was what you would think was idyllic.
As long as you fell in line and played the part written for you by the long line of family money.
When you didn’t, they put you out and turned their backs on you.
His role was to be a lawyer for the family and to make sure all the things that weren’t quite on the up-and-up never saw the light of day.
By the time Hermes was sixteen, he was on several watch lists.
Not for attacking anyone or taking from anyone, but for exposing major corruption, including the generations of it in his own family.
This led to his being sixteen and alone.
One of our members at the time turned out to be his black-sheep uncle.
So, when Hermes came knocking, we took him in, provided everything he needed to do what he did well.
That worked for us in the end because now he is on our side.
He still takes great pride in exposing those who take advantage and harm others, but he is always watching and has the club's back.
“What is it, Hermes?” I ask him casually.
“I finally finished reviewing the videos around the time of Jenny’s disappearance.” His words are sharp and unforgiving.
Stepping around him, I open my office door, waving him in. “What you got, brother?”
“Once you were able to get me Shea and Anastasia’s information, I dug into them first.” He hands me his iPad before he paces the room. “Anastasia did exactly what she said she did. She has worked shit jobs. If she wasn’t at work, she was taking care of Rusher.”
I flip through the file he built on her, every few pages finding pictures of a smaller Rusher with Anastasia.
“She has never come anywhere near anyone involved with the club or cartel that I can tell or see. Shit, if anyone associated ever showed up in the same place as her, she would pack her shit and move, starting over somewhere else. The thing that caught my attention and, to be honest, what makes me believe it was planned is the fact that bikers, the cartel, or both would always show up shortly after Shea would visit them.” He stops talking.
My eyes snap up to his. “What the fuck? Do you think that’s how Shea keeps her away and disconnected?”
“I don’t know. It should seem super weird to me. To be honest, we need more information from Anastasia.” Before I can say anything to him, he holds a hand up. “No, I know she needs to rest, but Raider, we really need to talk to her.”