Chapter 17
17
RAE
I spun my arms in the water to keep me afloat as I gaped in the direction Alec stormed off. What the hell just happened? Lost in desire, loving the feel of him as he ground against me, and then he freaked out.
Like a switch flipped, he went from hot to frigid with zero explanation. He just left me confused, again. This was proving to be an unpleasant habit of his, one I was clearly enabling by constantly going back to him.
I lay on my back, enjoying the water as I thought back to high school and the utter heartbreak that left scars and holes in my soul. All I needed was an explanation, something that told me it wasn’t something I did. Because that was how it felt then and now.
A shadow casting over me had me splashing to stand.
“Sorry to startle you, but I saw Alec storm off.” Sherry’s lips pursed as she glared back at the house. “I thought I’d join you.” She held up an empty glass and another bottle of white wine.
I opened my mouth to say, “No, thanks,” that I wanted some alone time, but stopped. I was tired of being lonely and not having anyone to talk to. Standing, I waded through the shallow end for the steps.
“You know what? That sounds great. I haven’t had someone to drink with in a long time.”
After grabbing a towel, I wrapped it around my chest and sat in the chair I’d vacated what seemed like forever ago. When all I wanted was to avoid his questioning. I took a tentative sip of the wine I had yet to touch and grimaced when I found it slightly warm. I might have been okay with cheap wine but warm white wine? Yuck.
Digging through the ice bucket, I pulled out a few cubes and plopped them into the yellow-tinted liquid. The ice swirled as I moved the plastic glass to disperse the ice’s cold temperature evenly.
“What happened?” Sherry asked after pouring herself a glass from the opened bottle chilling in the bucket. “He seemed… destroyed.”
“That’s how I feel, but more confused.” I took a drink and savored the cool crispness on my tongue before swallowing. “He’s good at that. Leaving without warning and leaving me confused and hurt. I should really stop allowing him to do it, but it’s Alec, and I….”
“Love him?” She reached across the table and gave my hand a comforting squeeze. I lifted my wet eyes to meet hers. “I’ve worked with that man for years, so maybe I can help you understand him, his reactions. I can see he loves you too and didn’t mean to leave you hurting. He’s just confused and a male, which means he’s terrible at communicating his feelings.”
I laughed and took another drink. I stared at the wine as it swirled along the sides. “My mom told me he would break my heart, and I didn’t believe her. I never thought he’d just up and leave me, not when we were… everything.” Emotions clogged in my throat. “For weeks after he left, I sat by our home phone waiting for his call, but it never came. He never bothered explaining why he just left me like I meant nothing to him and never came back. Just like now.” My voice broke. “I thought I meant something to him, that we were working toward something together, and then he just walked away. I’m a damn fool falling for him all over again, aren’t I?”
“No, honey, you’re not a fool. We can’t control who our hearts latch on to. Alec Bronson is just as confused as you are, I have no doubt. Did he tell you about his dad?” I nodded while filling my empty glass. “I won’t go into detail on what all I know—that’s his story to share—but please be patient with him. He’s a good man, and his heart is as big as this state, but he struggles with knowing how to communicate what he’s feeling and why, which is what probably happened out here. Alec’s love language is action, doing things for the person he cares about, not by saying the words out loud.”
“What do you mean?”
The corners of her lips tugged upward.
“He might not say the words explaining how he feels about you, but I know he cares deeply. He brought you here, after all, introduced you to me. Then there’s him dropping everything, pushing out some time off he needed, to race to your side when you called. I was outside the door when you called. He could barely contain his panic when you said you were in trouble. I saw it in his eyes, in his body language. He wouldn’t drop everything for anyone, not when he had to butter up the Ranger over that territory to come help you.”
Wait. Sweetcreek isn’t his territory? And he did all that so he could help me? That bit of knowledge did something funny to my heart.
“You mean something to him. How far that will go is up to you two, but don’t give up on him because he’s a fool.” She shot me a wink over the wineglass pressed to her lips. “Give him time to figure out what happened. He probably doesn’t even know himself just yet. His daddy broke a little boy with his fists and belt.” I winced at the thought. “And if you ask me, that little boy is still in there, keeping everyone at arm’s length to never allow someone to hurt him again.”
We sat in silence for a while, each sipping and watching the water. My mind, every thought, was on Alec and thinking through everything Sherry said. My self-doubt wanted to tell me he stormed off because of something I did or how I looked, but Sherry’s words said something completely different. Alec hinted that he had left because of him, to protect me all those years ago. What if it was the same now?
Sherry stood with a groan and switched out the empty wine bottle in the tub for the fresh one. I downed the remaining wine in my glass and stood to follow her inside.
“Oh no, honey, you stay out here. Drink this bottle and enjoy the pool.” My smile of thanks was easy, the pain from Alec’s rejection nearly gone. “Just sit out here and wait for a bit.”
I crinkled my nose in confusion. “Wait for what?”
Her face turned stormy. “For a damn apology.”
I knew I liked her.