CHAPTER 40
Emma
Stepping into Krusk’s apartment, holding his hand and rubbing my palm over my chest, I was awed by the emotions swirling there. Handing in my letter of resignation hadn’t made me feel the way I thought I would.
Krusk hadn’t spoken to me, allowing me to settle and come to terms with everything on my own. I appreciated that, but I was over it now.
Turning to look up at him, I watched him search my expression, his brow furrowed and worried. I lifted my hand, crooking a finger for him to lower his head. There was no way I could reach him on my own. Not even if I tiptoed.
When he bent to me, I reached up, grabbing his tusks and yanking his head to me. His groan was long and deep inside his chest, sending a gush of cream to my pussy. I loved the sounds this male made. I loved him.
If I’d had any worries before about him, if I’d been concerned at all, everything I felt was now as clear as the cloudless blue skies outside of his windows.
“What’s going on?” he asked, pulling away from my desperate lips to ask, his hands cupping my face when I tried to lunge for him again.
“You barely spoke to me and I didn’t want to disturb whatever’s happening inside of you.
Can you tell me now? What’s happening? Are you sad?
Are you disappointed? Do you feel pressured? After quitting?”
He searched my face again, his brow furrowed and worried, his eyes swirling with emotions that I didn’t feel an ounce of. I needed to reassure my male.
“I feel free,” I murmured with a little laugh, cupping his cheeks as well, running my palms over his tusks and grinning like a fool.
“I thought... I thought I would be upset. But I haven’t felt this relieved ever.
” I searched his face, swallowing hard, my throat tight with emotion.
“Thank you. Thank you so much for that. I needed it, and I hadn’t even understood how much until it happened. ”
His parted lips and wide eyes told me he was as shocked as I was with that revelation. I laughed, reaching up to steal another kiss from him. He didn’t hesitate this time. He ravaged my lips, moaning in a low rumble of sound.
“It feels like I’m taking advantage of you,” I gasped, before nipping at his lower lip. “Your kindness, your generosity. Everything you’ve given me.”
“It’s not,” he told me, wrapping his arms under my ass and with the tiniest of efforts, he’d lifted me against him, backing me toward the bedroom.
I grinned, ecstatic that we were headed in that direction. “How about your cock? Can I take advantage of that?”
He ran his lips over my lower jaw, swiping his tongue over my skin. “Please, Zemar. Take all the advantage you want of it.”
I laughed, the lightness in my heart reminding me of my old self. Of the person I used to be before... everything.
“Do you think that Savla will mind?” I gasped, and Krusk pulled away with a scowl, the first one that I’d seen on his face aimed my way. “What?” I wondered, wrapping my legs around his waist and nuzzling his pointed ear, swiping my tongue over it.
His low, pleased grunt told me I was forgiven for whatever I’d done. “I don’t like you saying another male’s name when we’re like this,” he grumbled and that confession shocked another laugh from me.
“Krusk Everlock,” I giggled. “Are you jealous of your younger brother right now?”
He stilled, pulling back to look at me and guilt was written across his face. Some of my amusement died, concern replacing it and I wiggled until he let me down. He didn’t hesitate for even a moment, allowing me to free myself.
I tugged on his hand until he moved with me to the bed. I gestured for him to sit on the edge and he did, his expression not changing at all.
When I moved to spread my legs over his lap, hiking my skirt up to do so, his eyes widened for a moment before I settled over him, straddling his waist. The tightness of my thighs—after spreading them for him the last time and settling over him now—didn’t bother me.
He was a big male. A huge male. And my body was going to have to get used to him. This was a start.
I only wanted to focus on this male. On everything I needed to know about him. I ignored the twinge, cupping his face instead. “What’s wrong?” I demanded.
He swallowed hard, his thick throat moving with the action, his prominent Adam’s apple bobbing. “I... haven’t told you everything.” He tried to look away, but I didn’t let him, narrowing my eyes on him.
“What did you need to tell me?” I asked, and he sighed, eyes moving over my face to gauge my reaction as he ran shaking hands over my ass.
I wasn’t going to complain about it. I loved his hands on me. So his hands moved more firmly, running his palms over my ass as if he was soothing himself.
“I...” he searched my face. “I’m scared you’ll run from me,” he admitted, and I bit back a smile.
“I’m pretty sure if I didn’t run when I first saw you at the restaurant, I’m never going to,” I said, running my fingers down his cheek, marveling at how handsome he was.
“That’s part of it,” he whispered, studying me as if he was memorizing my face. I wondered if he was scared that whatever he had to say would be too much. That it would make me run and he’d never see me again.
A frisson of concern ran up my spine. What could be so horrible?
“Lin... gave me information about you,” he told me and I smirked down at him.
“Yeah, I already knew that,” I told him.
“But I used that information to find more about you,” he said in a rush. “Savla and I did a background search on you.”
A small laugh left me as I rolled my eyes. “Krusk, I figured that out when you showed up at the yoga studio,” I said with a snort. “There was no way that was a coincidence.”
He frowned, shaking his head. “I thought... I thought you would be scared.”
I shrugged, running my thumbs down his cheeks.
“I was a little, at first. I didn’t know what your intentions were.
I thought you were dating Lin and I didn’t understand.
..” I trailed off, shaking my head and running my lips over his jaw again, possessiveness filling my heart.
“I didn’t realize how much I wanted you until I thought you wanted someone else,” I told him, shaking my head.
“I never want anyone else,” he murmured against my lips, kissing me again. Deeper. “Ever. You need to know one more thing.”
He pulled away to look at me again, and I knew this was the big one. The real thing he wanted to admit. Bracing myself, I nodded, letting him know I was listening.
“You’re my mate,” he whispered and I frowned at the word.
“Mate?” I asked, the word ringing some bells of the research that I’d done on orcs. “As in... fated mate?” I swallowed hard, the significance of that word and the seriousness of his expression telling me that I wasn’t fully grasping what he was telling me.
“Yes,” he said, carefully. Nodding, he searched my face, and I just shook my head at him.
“I’m sorry,” I told him. “I don’t fully understand what that means. Can you explain it?”
He released a puff of breath, palms running over my ass as if he was seeking comfort from my body.
“It’s the one person in the world that we’ll be tied to completely for the rest of our lives.
Your mate in every way. The person that was made for you.
” He didn’t stop touching me, even as I tried to come to terms with what he was telling me.
“That seems... intense,” I admitted to him. And all he did was give me a slow nod.
“Biologically, we’ll be the most compatible,” he continued. “We’ll be able to have many younglings.”
My mouth dropped open and I glanced down at my stomach. “As in... I could be pregnant?”
He shook his head, glancing away as if embarrassed. “No... when we... you weren’t fertile. I could scent it on you.”
My body relaxed and I released a relieved breath.
“Good. I don’t know if I’m ready for that yet.
I want kids, but not until everything is settled in my life,” I explained as his eyes shuttered.
I didn’t want to hurt him, but I definitely wasn’t ready for a little person to be wholly dependent on me… yet.
“I’d never rush you,” he murmured, brow furrowed as if he was worried I would think otherwise. “Our younglings will be perfect. And we’ll have them when both their parents are ready for them. And while Grandma’s still around to get to know them, too.”
Relief coursed through me and I nodded, pressing my forehead against his, unable to speak. I waited for a long moment as he nuzzled our noses together.
Our breaths mingled, and I ran a palm down his chest, focusing myself and allowing the anxiety to retreat. “Tell me more about fated mates,” I whispered, not wanting to speak loudly.
This moment felt precious somehow. As if it was the beginning of something I didn’t understand yet. But I would.