Chapter 25 #2
The thought alone makes me go cold inside, and so I force it from my mind.
“How do you want to handle this?” Talon asks.
“Let me talk to him alone,” I offer.
Talon nods. “Be my guest. Yell if he tries to eat you,” he says, and then disappears into the tiny kitchen around the corner.
I scrub a hand over my face, the stubble on my cheeks and chin rough against my palm. I don’t know what I’m going to say to get Cassian to agree to help us. I don’t have leverage like I did before. He helped me, and I helped him.
Even though we’ve been roommates for the last few months, I’d hardly call us close.
For the most part, I hardly saw the guy.
It’s not like I can find much common ground with him.
He might look like he’s in his late thirties, but he’s really a two-thousand-year-old vampire, and I’m a dragon shifter in my twenties.
But I’m not leaving this place until he’s on board, because getting Haven to the creature world is the only way I can think to protect her. And failure isn’t an option.
I don’t bother knocking. I walk straight into the bedroom, the only one in the apartment.
I crashed on a pull-out couch in the living room.
He owes me for that. It was lumpy and too short, but it was clear Cassian needed his space and was here more than I was.
I really only came back to the apartment to sleep, having spent most of my time at the Order’s headquarters, searching for Haven.
There isn’t much in the sparsely furnished room.
A metal twin bed is pushed into the corner, the thin blanket pulled tight and tucked with military precision.
A rickety nightstand holds a half-empty glass of water and a stack of books, some new, some so worn the spines are unreadable.
A single lamp casts a weak yellow glow that doesn’t quite reach the corners.
Near the far wall, a chair sits in front of the window, and that’s where Cassian is, motionless, staring out over the New York City street below.
For a moment, I just stand there, taking him in. Cassian looks better than he did the night Shadow Striker was destroyed. Less like a ghost clawing his way back to the living. The hollow sharpness in his cheeks has filled out a little, and there’s color where there wasn’t before.
His dark hair, streaked with that faint red tint, falls loosely over his forehead and almost reaches his collar, and though his frame isn’t what it probably once was when he was in his prime, he no longer looks breakable.
His build isn’t gaunt anymore, like it was at first, yet there’s still a hollowness to him, like strength that’s been used up and never quite restored.
Even sitting still, he carries the weight of centuries. Shoulders slightly stooped, eyes fixed on the city below, as if watching a world that kept moving without him.
The skyline stretches beyond the glass, alive and endless, but he only watches.
I realize that’s how he exists now, experiencing the world from a distance, like life’s still happening out there somewhere, just not for him.
I wonder, and not for the first time, what this all must be like for him, having endured centuries trapped inside Shadow Striker with a demon.
It’s a fate I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.
“I won’t go back there,” Cassian says, acknowledging that he knows I’m there without turning to look at me.
“If you’re worried about being a prisoner again, we can protect you from the Society.”
“It’s not that,” he says, his voice detached.
I rack my brain, trying to figure out what an ancient vampire would want in exchange for his help.
“Do you need some more blood? I guess I can figure out—”
“No,” Cassian snaps. He turns his head to stare at me, and his gaze is cold.
“Well, then, what do you want? You don’t want to go back, I get that, but there has to be something that’ll change your mind. Going through the gates isn’t an option, and we have to get Haven to the creature world to protect her. There’s a chance the Society will know what to do to stop the demon.”
“There’s nothing I want except to be left alone,” he says, and then turns back to the window.
My patience snaps and I kick the chair, sending Cassian tumbling to the ground. One second he’s blinking up at me from the floor with a look of utter disbelief, and the next I’m flying across the room, slamming into the wall, leaving a Becks’ size indent in the drywall before falling to the ground.
I shake my head, coughing on drywall dust as I try to process what just happened. It’s my turn to stare up at him in disbelief. He moved so fast I didn’t even see the hit coming.
Cassian stands near the overturned chair, chest heaving, a wild look on his face.
Dude might look frail, but he sure still packs a punch.
I cautiously lumber to my feet, watching the fight drain out of his eyes.
“Everything okay in there?” Talon calls from the other side of the door.
“Yeah, we’re cool,” I answer. At least now we are, having both gotten that out of our systems.
Steps sound as Talon retreats back into the kitchen.
“I can’t go back,” Cassian says again, pain and sadness radiating from him. “She’s there.”
“Who?” I ask, confused.
“Aurelia.”
It dawns on me who he means. The love of his life. If the stories are correct, he killed her in a fit of rage while under the dagger’s influence. That sacrifice stopped his reign of terror but also trapped him in the dagger for two millennia of torture.
“She’s not there anymore. She’s been gone for a very, very long time.”
He shakes his head. “She’s not gone. She’s everywhere. And nowhere. And I can’t stand it.”
He lifts his hands and buries them in his hair, squeezing his head as if that will somehow rip her memory from his mind.
I shouldn’t understand what he’s saying, but I do. He doesn’t know how to live without her, but her memory tortures him as well. Despite everything, I feel for him.
If only he could make the portal and stay here in the human world.
But if he doesn’t come with us, we may never be able to get back.
Even if the demon never gets Haven, it would still mean leaving a powerful and murderous entity on the loose in the human world.
It’s been able to do plenty of damage by using people’s bodies.
We can’t just run and hide, leaving the human world vulnerable to such a powerful and evil being.
“I know how hard this must be for you, but we can’t do this without you.”
“You know nothing, boy.” There isn’t venom in his voice, only resignation.
“I know what it’s like to care about someone so much, you’d do anything for them. Lie. Steal. Kill. Even lay down your own life.”
Cassian regards me but doesn’t snap back. I take that as a good sign.
“If Aurelia were here, what would she want you to do?” I ask quietly.
His face crumples.
“You lost her, and maybe it’s not fair of me to ask, but I’m doing it anyway. If you don’t care about saving this world or the other, at least help me save the woman I care—” I cut myself off as something simple slips into place. Something enviable and right.
Haven isn’t just someone I care about. It’s more than that. And if I want Cassian’s help, I have to lay it all out on the line.
“Help me save the woman I’m falling in love with.”
I shut the door behind me to let Cassian gather anything he wants to take with him.
“We have a guest,” Talon says, and when I look over, Kade steps out from behind him.
“Didn’t take you as one to go rogue,” he says, a frown pulling down his features.
I cross my arms over my chest, assessing the Order leader. “You have a mole in your organization,” I say bluntly.
Kade nods, his thick locs swaying with the movement. “I know. We found him. He’s been handled.”
My eyebrows shoot up my forehead and I glance at Talon, trying to read what he thinks of this news, but his face is unreadable. That in and of itself tells me all I need to know.
Talon isn’t willing to take Kade at his word any more than I am.
I like the guy, despite the fact he imprisoned me when we first met, but I’m not taking any chances with Haven’s life.
“Who was it?” I ask, acting like I believe him.
His face hardens before he says, “Ares.”
“What?” I ask, dropping the pretense. The powerful fae seemed as loyal as they come, practically Kade’s second. To say I’m shocked is an understatement.
Talon manages to keep his reaction mostly in check, but I notice a slight widening of his eyes, betraying his surprise as well.
“Yeah,” Kade says, suddenly looking tired.
“How did you find out?” I ask, still reeling.
Kade sighs. “We realized one of the vampire clans had his sister. They held her hostage, threatened to bleed her dry if Ares didn’t provide them with intel they then passed on to the demon. Ares is being held in the subbase floor of the Order.”
I’m familiar with that level. That’s where they held me. If they put magic-blocking cuffs on him, I’m confident he’s not going anywhere until they want him to.
“And his sister?” I ask.
Kade’s features pinch and he shakes his head. “We tried to get her out, but once they realized Ares was compromised, they killed her. Her body washed up downriver yesterday.”
Talon cusses under his breath, and then asks, “What do you plan to do with him?”
“I don’t know,” Kade says. “Ares has been loyal to the Order for so many years, but something like this can’t go unexcused. People died because of this betrayal.”
I want to be mad at the redheaded fae for his deception—and I am; Haven and I were almost killed because of his actions—but they had his sister. I can relate with letting the world burn to protect the ones you love, even if it’s wrong.
Really, I’m just sad.
Sad for Ares. Sad for his sister. Sad for everyone caught up in this mess.
We need to figure out how to take this demon out and end this, once and for all.
“So, what are you doing here?” I ask, folding my arms across my chest.
“I want to know what you have planned so we can work together.”
I’m shaking my head even before he’s finished speaking. “I’m glad you found the mole, but if they can get to Ares, who’s to say they haven’t compromised someone else?” One glance at Talon and I know he’s thinking the same thing. “It’s not a chance I’m willing to take.”
“Don’t be hardheaded about this. The Order has more resources than you do. You can only keep her safe on your own for so long.”
I think about our plan to go to the creature world and how much safer Haven will be a world away. And how I’ve just convinced Cassian to help us. “I think we’ve done okay so far.”
“I have just as much interest in keeping the girl safe as you do,” Kade says.
That’s highly unlikely, I think, but keep my mouth shut.
“Fine, you don’t want the Order involved,” he says. “I get that. Then just me. I still know this world better than the both of you. You’re both formidable in a fight, I won’t debate that, but you can’t tell me it wouldn’t help to have an extra set of hands right now.”
I cut my gaze to Talon, trying to read what he thinks of this, but I can’t tell. He seems on the fence.
“I would do anything to stop this demon from gaining full powers and a physical form. Let me help,” Kade adds, and the look on his face makes me believe him. Or at least want to.
“If Kade helps Cassian get ready, then we can get back to the girls and their parents,” Talon says evenly.
Kade looks confused, not yet having figured out why we’re here for Cassian.
“Their parents aren’t going to like it,” I say.
“That’s an understatement,” he agrees.
It’s going to take a little time to gather the materials Cassian needs to open a portal.
Getting back to Haven rather than having to stay with him and prepare to open the portal would be preferable.
But as much as I like and respect Kade, there’s only one way I’m going to be okay with letting him in on our plans.
I look him straight in the eye and say, “How do you feel about blood oaths?”