Chapter 24
One Week Later
Y ulianna
As hard as I tried, I hadn’t been able to get my wedding date moved again. It had always been a long shot, but I’d hoped that Christov would give up or my father would see reason and change his mind. Neither had happened as both men were stubbornly persistent on this arrangement going forward.
I hadn’t spoken to my parents directly since my tantrum in Father’s office. All my messages had been sent via notes or my guards, but today…today, I was going to have to speak to my mother.
She had at least tried to see me, even though I refused all of her requests. Now, here I was, swallowing my pride and asking for help. If my mother really wanted to make amends, this was the way she could show her support. But she could also tell my father what I had planned. It was a risk I had to take because there was no other way to accomplish my plan without her.
The only time I didn’t feel restless was when I was holding a paintbrush, and it helped me focus my rage, so I turned back to my latest painting. The subject was my father’s new stallion. I’d watched him from my window being worked in the paddock. He was a handful, rearing and striking at his handlers. His midnight black coat and the wildness in his eyes had caught my attention the first day he arrived. I’d snuck down to the stables in the middle of the night to see Bucephalus up close and could feel his pain. He wanted to be free, not pacing his stall and snorting in protest to his captivity.
A knock at the door pulled me from the memory. I turned as Vlad ushered my mother inside. She looked sheepish as she looked around. I’d stripped all the expensive paintings from the walls and put them in my old bedroom. After a fresh coat of paint, I hung my art on all the old hooks.
“Yulianna, you look….”
“Like what,” I asked defensively as the hairs on my neck stood.
“So mature,” she said. I relaxed and turned back to my painting. “It’s been almost a year…I…I’m so sorry for everything.”
Sighing, I set my palette down and walked over to my espresso machine.
“I’m making myself a cup. Would you like one?”
“You don’t have the staff do that?”
“Why would I? I have two perfectly capable hands. I make all of my own meals now as well,” I said and then stared as my mother blushed and looked away.
“Yes, I’ll have one.”
While the coffee was brewing, I set the small table I used for my meals with a tray of cookies, sugar, and cream.
“Sit,” I said, pointing to the seat.
She walked over like I might bite her.
“Please don’t take this the wrong way, but…you seem so different. I feel like my daughter has disappeared, and now you’re….”
I raised my brow. “Let me guess, I’m acting like a man, like Father.”
She nodded. “Yes, that’s probably the best way to put it.”
“No, Mother. I’m acting like a woman in charge of her own life now. I was naive. I thought that Father saw me as a person, but I was wrong. Unlike you, who accepted your fate, I have not,” I said, and she pressed her lips together at the direct jab.
She had never wanted to marry my father. My mother had loved Uncle Dimitri and he loved her back. Despite Dimitri asking for her hand, my grandfather chose Vadin instead. History loved to repeat itself, but I would be the last of this family line forced into a loveless marriage.
“That’s not fair, Yuli. I love your father.”
I chuckled as I grabbed the cups and walked over to sit at the table with her.
“Maybe now, but you didn’t. You sold a piece of your soul to remain in this house and raise me. You found a way to live with it. A million others could as well. But I can’t.”
She looked away, her eyes shimmering with a pain that I understood, but there was no room in my heart for sympathy, not anymore.
My mother was still a beautiful woman. Her blonde hair was in a neat twist, not a hair out of place, which showed off her sparkling blue eyes. She could pass for my sister if not for the smile lines at the corner of her eyes and the little bit of silver in her hair.
“You’re right, I didn’t fight back. But I didn’t feel that I could. You’re so much stronger than I was, Yuli. You make me very proud to be your mother and a woman,” she said, shocking me.
She placed her hand on mine. The massive diamond ring on her finger seemed more like a ball and chain than a symbol of love, no matter how stunning. At one point, when I was young and didn’t understand what it meant, I’d been enamored with the glitter and asked her if I could have one too. Now, I wouldn’t want it for anything.
“I need you to know that I tried to talk your father out of the switch. He was ready to sign the marriage contract to Edmundo.”
“Then what happened,” I asked, not sure I wanted to hear this.
“Christov’s father called with an opportunity the same night Eddie made his offer. Your father said it was too good to pass up. It was a chance at moving our name up in all the political circles. I was livid and told him he was going to tear this family apart, but he didn’t listen. He’s always been a stubborn man. He said that I learned to love him, and you’d learn to love Christov.”
Tears spilled out of my mother’s eyes and slid down her cheeks.
“Maybe if I’d been stronger at your age and stood up for what I wanted, then you wouldn’t be going through this now. I’m so sorry.”
I wanted to rage at her and blame her all over again, but the sadness and guilt in her eyes were genuine. Gently tugging my hand away, I stood and walked over to my window.
“Please say something. Yell at me if you need to. I deserve it. I’ll do anything to have my daughter back.”
“I feel like I live in a cage and always have. The only time I’ve tasted true joy is when I’m with Eddie. He makes my soul fly. Locked up here as Father’s prisoner, I’m slowly dying inside. Each day it’s a little worse than the day before. And I’m not sure what is worse…knowing that I’m trapped, or that Father doesn’t care what happens to me.” I stared up at the clouds wishing that I could soar away with the birds. “No, I won’t yell, but I do need your help. If you’re serious about wanting us to reconnect, then you can’t argue or try to talk me out of doing this. I just need your help, because I can’t and won’t continue living like this the rest of my life.”
She met me at the window and grabbed my hands again, holding them tight.
“Anything. You tell me what you need, and as long as it’s not changing your father’s mind, I’ll do it.”
“You really mean that? You won’t tell Father?”
My mother lifted her chin, her blue eyes hardening with a determination I’d never seen in her before.
“You have my word. You’ve always been the most important person in my life. I will do whatever I can to help.”
I nodded as I fought back the urge to wrap her up in my arms with relief. She needed to prove that she meant what she said and wouldn’t break under my father’s questioning.
“The wedding to Christov is set for the last weekend in February, as you know, but I refuse to have his child.” My mother’s brow furrowed in confusion. “I need you to book a girl’s trip for us. We’ll bring Frida and my friend Ella.”
“Okay…but what does this have to do with Christov and not having his child.”
“It will be a week-long spa getaway. I’ll give you the location and it must be for the second week in January.”
My mother tilted her head, and I could see her thinking. I licked my lips, my heart racing as I prepared to give her everything she required to take me down and have me locked up until my wedding day if she betrayed me.
“I’m going to trust you with this information, Mom. But if you break my trust, we are done forever.”
She squeezed my hands before replying.
“I swear that I won’t betray you. I’ve already done too much of that by being compliant with the way this world works and my role in it. On my life, I will go to my grave with your secret.”
“Eddie will meet us there, and I will get pregnant. I’ve gotten some extra help to make sure.”
“Like hormones?”
“Among other things, yes. Once I have my baby, I’ll need your help again. Please say you’ll do this. I can’t have that monster’s child.”
Mother pulled me into a hug, and I allowed myself the little bit of comfort that I’d longed for since the day my world crashed around me.
“Yes, I’ll help you. It’ll be dangerous, but I know just who to call.” Mother pulled back and cupped my face. “I love you, my daughter, and from this day on, you will have me by your side for anything you need.”
“Thank you. I love you too, Mom. Please don’t hurt me like Father.”
“I won’t. Now, let’s have that coffee and catch up. I have so much to tell you.”
Smiling, I let her lead me back to the table, and for the first time since my birthday, there was a real ray of sunshine and a glimmer of hope.