3
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Ada
Thankfully, Jonathan Oaks and his assistant were gone by the time I arrived home.
After experiencing one of the most embarrassing encounters of my life—Jonathan walking in on me when I was stepping out of the bath—I pretty much hoped to avoid ever seeing him again. Yes, he’d be at the funeral, but once that was over, and I was moved out of Leonora’s house, I prayed our paths didn’t cross. I mean, the man literally saw everything . And how smug he’d been about it afterward? Ugh, I’d wanted to slap him.
To escape the awkwardness, not to mention my fury at being given the option of paying almost seven times my current rent or moving out within a week, I’d gone to grab some groceries and attempt to calm down. And yes, I was aware that a grand a month was pretty much the going rate for a room these days, but I had debt I was currently paying off that ate away at my salary.
Two years ago, after much misery having my leg issues treated through the public health system in Ireland, I’d opted to travel to Austria. It was one of the top countries in Europe for orthopaedics, and there was a surgeon there offering a new, cutting-edge procedure. The surgery had gone well, and it eliminated much of my pain, as well as 95 percent of my mobility issues, but it had also left me in debt. A lot of debt. The loan would be paid off in another two years, but until then, I needed to live frugally, which was why living at Leonora’s had been ideal. She and Dad got a live-in gardener/shopper/housekeeper, and I got cheap rent.
With my dad and his lovely wife gone, those days were over. I’d pay the highest rent in the world if it would bring them back. I wasn’t sure how I was going to manage without them. It was their company I’d miss the most. Living with family was a lot different than living alone or with housemates. I liked having someone there I could talk to about my day, someone to watch TV and eat meals with.
When I was done with the groceries, I went to visit my sister, Frances. Like me, she and Dad hadn’t been close for a long time, but he had been a part of her life in recent years, and I knew his passing affected her almost as much as it affected me. She still hadn’t found the right moment to tell her kids that their granddad had died.
“Oh man, I bet you were livid,” my sister replied in a hushed voice after listening to a recap of my morning. She stood leaning against her kitchen counter, a cup of tea held to her lips as she took a sip. Frances was tall and slender, with a pale complexion and bright red hair. She was the spitting image of our mother, whereas I was a carbon copy of Dad.
If she didn’t have such a fondness for animals, she could’ve been a catwalk model. As it were, she adored her job working at the local animal sanctuary.
“That’s one way of putting it,” I replied, knowing by her expression that though she was outraged on my behalf, she also found the first part of the story a small bit hilarious.
Glad my mortification could provide her with a little bright spot amid all the misery.
“He’s so full of himself, and he acts like I’m some kind of scumbag who was taking advantage of his mother’s kindness. No mention of what great condition the house is in. I adored both Dad and Leonora, but if it were left to them, the place would be falling apart. I can’t begin to count the number of repairs I’ve arranged since moving in.”
“You definitely spruced the place up,” Frances agreed, though her voice was faraway, and I knew she was back in her grief. It was difficult to escape. You had moments where you could be normal and focus on practical things, then a wave of loss would hit you like a sledgehammer.
“Hey, are you all right?” I asked, standing and going to put my arms around her.
Frances sniffled. “I know he made our lives so fucked up when we were kids, but the way he was the last few years … He was such a great grandfather to the girls. I hate that they’ve lost him.”
In the other room, her six-year-old triplets, Donna, Dakota and Dahlia, were watching some kids’ show and giggling about something funny happening on screen.
“I hate it, too. But they have you and Glen. You two are the best parents those girls could ask for, and they’ll get through this. I know they will.”
Frances gave another sniffle. “I hope you’re right.”
Hugging her tight, we stayed like that, taking comfort from one another for a time.
***
I didn’t normally go into work on Sundays, but I’d been out all week, and I needed to drop in and make sure everything was running smoothly in my absence. Managing a care home for the elderly could be a demanding job at times, and there was always something to be dealt with at Pinebrook Lodge. Always big and small issues to solve, whether it was repair work on the building itself, interpersonal issues between the residents or complaints and requests from relatives, every member of staff was kept on their toes.
There were sad moments to be had for sure, moments of frustration and fear, struggles when people called in sick and we were short staffed. But there was also laughter and joy, friendship and acts of selflessness.
Having been manager for almost eight years, I prided myself on the fact that every person I hired had a genuine interest in the work, which wasn’t very glamourous. In my view, though, caring for human beings when they became too old, sick or frail to care for themselves was one of the most important jobs a person could commit to. I knew what it was like to have to rely on others for care, which was probably why it was such a passion of mine. After my accident, Mam and Frances helped a lot during my rehabilitation. Now not a day went by when I didn’t appreciate my ability to get around on my own.
Currently, we had thirty-three residents, and I made it my mission to ensure they got the best possible treatment and care we could provide.
Alf, our maintenance man and occasional cleaner, was mopping the front entrance when I arrived. Alf was sixty-two and an absolute Godsend. I was dreading the day when he took his retirement, but I tried not to dwell on it too much.
“Ada, what are you doing here? I thought you’d be—”
“I just wanted to drop in and take care of a few things while I have the time. The funeral’s tomorrow, and all the preparations are done, so I’d rather not sit around the house doing nothing.”
Alf’s gaze softened in understanding. “I was so sad to hear about your father and his wife.”
“Thank you. I’ll be in my office if anyone needs me.”
Alf nodded, and I continued through the main lounge area. It was early, but a few residents were up watching TV or reading newspapers. I was close to a few of them, in particular Archie, Bill, Philomena and Jackie, all four of whom had been with us the longest. They would’ve heard the news about Dad and would want to console me, but I was feeling too raw even for kind, empathetic words from my lovely octogenarians.
The rawness was grief, but it was made worse by the presence of Jonathan Oaks in my life. Dealing with his assistant in arranging the funeral was fine. Therese seemed like a nice woman. But him . Ugh. There was just something about his entitled confidence that rubbed me the wrong way. And yes, he’d seen me naked. It felt unfair. I should get to see him naked to even out the score.
Obviously, that wasn’t going to happen any time soon. He didn’t strike me as the sort of man who was ever caught unawares, not like I had been the other day. Besides, I couldn’t even imagine him naked. Jonathan Oaks was so uptight he probably slept in a custom-made three-piece suit.
He wanted me out of his mother’s house, and though I had every right to stay another six months while I found a new place, my stupid, stubborn pride wouldn’t allow it. I would not beg a man like him for a single scrap of lenience. I refused. I knew it was going to bite me in the arse, but I couldn’t think about that. I would find a new place to live, and in the meantime, I was sure my sister wouldn’t mind if I slept on her couch in exchange for babysitting my nieces. They were a handful, but I loved them to bits, even if they always managed to talk me into letting them do my hair and makeup whenever I babysat.
I often ended the night looking like a deranged doll from a horror movie.
Remembering how my poor sister still had to tell all three girls about their granddad passing away, my heart clenched. It was going to be so tough for her and for them. Her kids had never experienced loss.
Stepping inside my office, I expected to find it empty when I realised someone was sitting at my desk painting their nails.
Hannah.
So, when I said everyone I hired was great, that did include Hannah. She was an amazing care worker, the most upbeat person you’d ever meet. She could cheer up the residents and put smiles on their faces like nobody else. Unfortunately, there would always be a strain between us, and that was because of my ex-boyfriend, Cathal. He was the nurse who visited Pinebrook a couple times a week to tend to the residents’ medical needs, and up until three years ago, he and I had been a couple.
We’d been together for four years before the relationship had just kind of fizzled out. Still, I’d been prepared to work on things and try to find the passion again. Cathal hadn’t felt the same way. He’d started acting differently about six months before he’d finally broken it off. Something in my gut had told me he’d been secretly seeing Hannah for those six months, especially since she’d always worn this vaguely startled, guilty expression whenever she’d been around me. The girl had zero poker face.
Still, I could never prove it.
Three months after our breakup, she and Cathal had begun to soft launch their relationship at work. Which, to be fair, was decent of them. At least they hadn’t come in smooching and canoodling a week after he’d left me. They’d given me some time to recover and regather my self-respect. It had been humiliating that my thirty-eight-year-old partner had dumped me and then started seeing a twenty-three-year-old right afterward. I’d been thirty-four at the time and therefore on the receiving end of lots of sad, commiserating smiles. Smiles that had said, “Poor thing, getting traded in for a younger model. She won’t have much chance at starting a family now.”
So, yeah, it had been awful, and I’d had to keep my chin up through it all, pretend Cathal’s new relationship didn’t affect me. That having to work every day in the same building as his gorgeous, sunshine-y, much younger new girlfriend hadn’t killed me a little inside. But as I said, I was stubborn. And the last thing I’d ever do was let people know how much it hurt.
Thankfully, the hurt had subsided, and I no longer felt much about Cathal and Hannah. As far as I was concerned, I hoped they were very happy together. They weren’t bad people, just a little selfish maybe. And besides, Cathal’s and my relationship had lost the spark and intensity long before the period where I suspected he and Hannah began their affair.
“Ada, I didn’t think you’d be in today,” she said, her cornflower blue eyes wide with horror.
I noted there was a half-finished cup of coffee and a half-eaten jam bun in front of her. She’d clearly been making herself comfortable in my office, thinking I wouldn’t be in. I couldn’t deny that her mortification at being caught was a tiny bit satisfying.
“So, you thought you’d make yourself at home?” I asked, folding my arms and cocking my head.
“I just, um, ah, I shouldn’t have,” she rambled as she began collecting her cup and plate in a rush while blowing on her freshly painted nails.
“And you know nail polish isn’t allowed,” I went on, eyeing her fingers. It was a health hazard for carers. She was supposed to keep her nails trim and clean of any polish.
“Oh! I thought it would be okay since it’s clear, but—” I shook my head, and she winced. “Okay, I’ll remove it ASAP. Sorry, Ada. And sorry for being in your office. It was completely inappropriate.”
“I’ll overlook it this time. I’m aware your job is stressful, and we all need a little space to take a break sometimes.”
At this, she appeared to relax. “Right, yes, that’s true.” She paused, biting her lip as her eyes turned sad. “I was devastated to hear about your father. I can’t imagine what you’re going through.”
I exhaled a short breath. “It’s been tough.”
“If you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here.”
“Thank you, that’s very kind.” We both knew she was the last person I’d confide in about my grief, but I was learning people needed to say those things when someone died. It smoothed over the awkwardness and discomfort.
With a soft smile, Hannah left my office, and I closed the door after her then dropped down into my chair with a sigh and powered up my computer. As I began checking things off my to-do list, my phone buzzed with several messages from Mam.
Sitting back, I rubbed at my temples and tried not to let the stress take over. My mother had been living in Spain for the last fifteen years. She was flying over for the funeral and would be landing tonight. Originally, it was planned that she’d stay with me at Dad and Leonora’s house, but since I’d been given my marching orders, she now had to stay with my sister, and she wasn’t pleased about it.
Despite having two daughters, Mam wasn’t exactly a “kid” person. She didn’t want to deal with children and staying in Frances’ small house with her husband and three girls wasn’t her first choice. As soon as I told her the change of plan, she’d proceeded to complain and hadn’t quit complaining since.
I loved my mother, but she was a sixty-year-old woman trapped within a twenty-one-year-old’s brain. No thought was given to the fact that Frances and I had just lost our dad. No, she was all about the inconvenience she would face sleeping on Frances’ couch. Maybe Dad’s alcoholism early in their relationship had stunted her maturity, or maybe it was simply her natural personality.
I sighed and scanned her messages. Seeing they were mostly complaints and nothing urgent, I didn’t reply. Normally, I had a little more patience for her theatrics. Despite my mother’s flaws, she’d been there for Frances and me far more when we were kids than Dad had been. But I was in too much inner turmoil. I didn’t have the energy to deal with her. Poor Glen, Frances’ husband, would have to listen to her when he picked her up at the airport tonight.
After a couple hours, I headed home. I spent the rest of the day packing up my belongings. There were a few items of furniture I was going to have to leave behind or try and sell because I had nowhere to store them while I found a new place. Everything else would thankfully fit in the back of my car.
The following morning, I put on my nicest black shift dress and styled my hair into a long braid. I did my makeup, but then something about how quiet the house was got to me. Dad and Leonora were gone. I’d never again see him sitting at the kitchen table, drinking coffee and doing crossword puzzles in the morning. Nor would I hear Leonora in the living room, watching her talk shows. The stark fact had me bawling my eyes out. I had to wash my face and completely redo my makeup. The foundation managed to cover most of the red blotches, but it was still clear from my puffy eyes that I’d been crying.
When I arrived at the church, I was immediately accosted by my mother, who’d come with Frances and Glen. She wore a figure-hugging black coat, her skin glowing with a tan since her place in Spain was right by the beach. Frances and Glen decided not to bring the triplets to the funeral. They felt they were too young to understand what was going on.
“I swear I’m going to need to make an appointment with a chiropractor after what your sister’s couch did to my back last night. I hardly slept a wink.”
“If you want, you can book a hotel for the next few nights until you fly home,” I suggested without thinking. “I know Frances wouldn’t mind.”
“A hotel? And who’s going to pay for that? I’ve already spent a fortune on a last-minute flight.”
I sensed someone’s attention and searched the gathered attendees before I spotted Jonathan Oaks. He stood tall and proud by the entrance to the church, and oddly, the woman I’d met while visiting his investment firm stood next to him, the one with the kind blue eyes who’d helped me down the stairs. She placed her hand on his arm, as though in comfort, and I briefly wondered if she were his girlfriend. Then I spotted the vague resemblance. She must’ve been a relative of some sort.
So, he was the kind of man who gave his family members jobs. I tried not to let that fact soften me towards him. He’d still cut his mother from his life for too many years, not to mention gave me an ultimatum about moving out of Leonora’s house.
Jonathan’s eyes met mine and held. There was a strange question in his gaze I couldn’t decipher.
“Ada? Are you even listening to me?” Mam asked, and I turned to her, a pit in my stomach. I just wanted this day over with.
“Yes, I’m listening. We should go join Frances and Glen and head inside. It’s almost time for the mass to begin.”
Later that day, after Dad and Leonora were laid to rest, we arrived at a nearby pub for the funeral reception. I hadn’t expected Jonathan to attend, but just as we stepped into the building, he appeared.
“Who’s that?” Mam whispered in my ear as he approached.
Jonathan reached us before I had a chance to answer and cleared his throat, ignoring everyone, his attention solely on me.
“Miss Rose, might I speak with you a moment?”
His deep, smooth cadence caused something in my stomach to unfurl while I lifted my chin and nodded. I didn’t want to speak to him, but this was our parents’ funeral, and I wasn’t about to cause a scene when everything so far had gone off without a hitch.
“Yes.”
“Please come with me,” he went on, and I followed him to a quiet corner of the bar while hearing my mother continue to pester my sister about Jonathan’s identity in the background.