Chapter 12 #6
Ranger couldn’t remember how long Jody had said her mom had been sober for, but he knew it had been a while. “Shit.”
“Her doctor at the rehab center gave Jody all this information on how menopause can affect middle-aged women and their sobriety.”
Ranger cringed a little. Having grown up with a mom and a sister, he was very familiar with period symptoms and terminology.
However, being uterus-free, he was very unknowledgeable on menopause.
It was just something he’d never discussed with his mom.
“Can’t say I ever thought about how the two of those connected. ”
“Turns out, a lot,” Toni drawled. “Jody didn’t want the information, but I kept them in case she changed her mind. Not that she can’t Google it if she did.”
Which also meant Toni could search on the internet as well. “What are you getting at, baby? That’s not something you’ll ever have to worry about with me.”
Toni finally looked at him instead of the ceiling. “I think it’s something I should have already been worried about, Liam. My mom was in early menopause.”
Oh, shit. “Fuck,” Ranger breathed out, not entirely sure what the difference was between normal menopause and early menopause. “You think that’s why she relapsed.”
“I mean, I don’t know for sure, but the timing fits.
I remember her bitching about the symptoms once, and there was something about me likely going into early menopause because she did, but I honestly wasn’t paying attention.
I feel like such a selfish bitch. What if Mom was trying to have a meaningful talk with me, trying to tell me about her struggles, and I was too busy with work to realize it?
What if the fact that she’s a woman is the reason she relapsed? ”
Ranger frowned, not liking Toni’s train of thought at all. “Hey,” he coaxed, jiggling her body. “What are the three Cs they teach you in Al-Anon?”
Toni glared up at him. “You’re missing the point of what I’m trying to say, Liam.”
“No, you’re missing the point,” he argued. “Tell me what the three Cs are.”
Grumbling, Toni said with a tight jaw, “You didn’t Cause it. You can’t Control it. You can’t Cure it.”
“Meaning…” he said pointedly.
Toni stuck her tongue out at him. “Meaning I did not cause, could not control, and could not cure my parents’ addiction.”
“Very good.” Ranger leaned down and kissed her gently.
It did not pass his notice that she used the past tense more and more recently when referring to both her parents.
“Whether your mom was on menopause or not, it doesn’t change that she chose to use.
” Toni bit her lip and blinked up at him several times. “What?” he asked.
“Did you just say she was ‘on menopause’?”
Ranger stared down at her in confusion. “Yeah… I figured you’re on your period, so wouldn’t you be on menopause?”
Toni smiled. “Oh my God. I am so telling your mother that in the morning.”
“Please don’t,” Ranger begged. “She’s likely to make me uterus cookies and force me to eat them while she educates me on menopause.”
She laughed. “Please tell me she made vagina and penis cookies to explain the birds and the bees to you.”
“Worse,” he admitted, cringing at the memory. “She had these ceramic frogs she painted in art class once, and she used them as models while my dad sat on the couch trying not to laugh.”
Toni could barely contain her own laughter at this announcement. “Oh, I wish I’d been a fly on the wall for that conversation.”
Ranger shook his head, grateful she hadn’t been anywhere near him as a teenager.
He’d been a bit…angry as a teen, still not completely over the trauma he and his mom had suffered at the hands of his sperm donor.
“How about this? I promise I will read up on menopause so I can better understand what it is you believe your mom was going through while you plan our date for tomorrow night.”
“We’re going on a date tomorrow night?” Toni grinned up at him. “We’ll have to move your meeting to earlier in the day.”
“That’s fine.”
“How come I get to choose this time? It’s your turn to spin the wheel?”
He shrugged. “I feel bad about how I’ve been the past couple of days, and I want to make it up to you. So no arguments or telling me that it’s not necessary. It absolutely is necessary. Plan our date, and I promise not to bitch, moan, or complain.”
Toni’s maniacal grin was spreading before he even finished his vow. “Coffee, bookstore, and dinner at the diner.”
“Fine,” Ranger agreed, swallowing hard, “but I’m capping your bookstore limit at two hundred dollars.”
Toni’s eyes widened as her nostrils flared and her lips trembled. If it wasn’t for the lack of tears, he honestly would think her heartbroken.
“Don’t look at me like that. Last time you bought so many books that they barely fit in my saddlebags.”
Her eyes somehow widened even more, and Ranger felt his own heart start to break at the sight.
“Fine! Three hundred, and we’ll bring a prospect along so he can take them back for you.”
Toni’s face immediately brightened and she laughed, “Ha-ha! Sucker!” Then she kissed him and rolled over on her pillow.