14. Hope
14
HOPE
A s I came down from my release, my muscles went lax, and I leaned back into Vaughn’s chest for support. With care, he stood and helped me from the bath and, after a quick towel dry, led me to the bedroom.
“On your back,” he said in a commanding tone while pointing to the bed.
With a quirk of my lips, I obeyed. Despite his bossiness, now wasn’t the time to be defiant, because I had zero intention of interfering with his plans.
I lay on the duvet and shifted to the middle of the bed, remaining on my elbows so I could watch this sinfully beautiful man stalk toward me. Everything about Vaughn made blood rush through my veins. His broad, defined torso, those delicious tattoos covering him from neck to ankle, and one hell of a tantalizing thick cock showing me exactly how much he wanted me. My pussy throbbed with renewed excitement. I’d only just come, but by God, I wanted more.
Vaughn’s gaze roamed every inch of me, but when I let my thighs part, his steps faltered. Those fearsome dark eyes shot to my exposed center, and his lids shuttered as though the sight of my slick flesh held him enthralled.
That such a small adjustment in my position could stop him in his tracks made me feel all kinds of powerful. Vaughn had his methods of control; I had mine. And I wasn’t above using a little devious persuasion to coax him to climb between my legs and sink inside me, because right now, I was salivating at the thought of it.
Except he still hadn’t pounced on me. Maybe I’d overestimated the power of the pussy. I needed to do something to get my man moving.
“Vaughn?” I asked, and gave him what I hoped was a seductive look. “Is this one of those times where I need to beg you to come here and fuck me senseless?”
He did that growling thing again, and it sent a jolt straight to my core. “You know I always want to hear that. But no, Gatita, you don’t need to beg for a single thing tonight.”
I tried to maintain my cool, while on the inside, I was doing the happiest of happy dances. But then Vaughn went to his duffel bag, and it took me a moment to realize what he was searching for.
Zip ties.
“No.” I sat up, and Vaughn stopped rummaging. “I don’t want either of us restrained.”
He frowned, then continued digging through a side pocket without meeting my eyes. “It’s too soon. Too risky.”
“It’s not.” I scooted to the edge of the bed. “Vaughn, stop.”
After exhaling a heavy breath, he turned to face me.
“You won’t hurt me. I know it to my bones. With everything that’s about to happen tomorrow, I need to feel you. All of you. And I want you to experience the same with me.”
“Hope, baby.” Wearing a pained expression, he rose and shook his head.
“We’re replacing the bad memories with good ones. Remember? And you were fine last night and this morning.” Not completely. He’d been anxious when I’d first started touching him, but as things had progressed, the zip ties had been an unnecessary burden.
He dropped his chin to his chest and closed his eyes as though considering my request or coming up with a way to let me down gently. In case it was the latter, I said, “Please, Vaughn. I wouldn’t ask if it weren’t important to me.”
What I didn’t tell Vaughn was that I was afraid. Afraid that something might go wrong when I tried to kill Carlos, or that I wouldn’t be able to go through with it. Afraid that if I failed my assassination attempt, my father would trap me and hide me from the world, in the same way he’d successfully remained concealed for years. But most of all, I was afraid that I’d never get this opportunity to be with Vaughn again. If this was our one chance to be together without any limitations, to truly give ourselves over to one another, then I wanted us to try.
He prowled toward me with a steely look of determination, and I craned my neck to follow his approach. His rough fingers gently brushed my cheek—the scarred side. It struck me how I hardly thought of my burns when I was with Vaughn. He never made me feel self-conscious about something I considered hideous. It was like he didn’t notice them at all.
Which meant I finally had the thing I’d wished for. Someone who saw beyond my appearance. Someone who didn’t judge me for the horrors my father caused. Someone who knew the real me and didn’t find me lacking.
This man. He acted like I was the one who’d saved him, but the truth was he’d saved me, too.
My throat clogged with emotion as I reconsidered handing myself over to the cartel. Was I doing the right thing? What would happen to Vaughn if I didn’t make it out? He’d only just resurfaced from the murky place he’d been living. If Carlos trapped me, would he plunge back into that darkness ?
Or do something reckless to find me.
Yeah. He would. I had to make my plan work.
Vaughn’s thumb continued tracing the apple of my cheek. “Why can’t I say no to you?”
Neither of us was prepared to answer that question, although I suspected what it meant.
Vaughn had fallen for me just as hard and fast as I’d fallen for him. To say it out loud, to make it real , seemed foolish. Like if we openly admitted what we were feeling, it might jinx what we’d set in motion. Because if it all came unstuck, if I risked everything to end my father’s organization and lost, I also risked suffering unimaginable heartbreak.
No. I wouldn’t think like that tonight. Not when Vaughn had just agreed to give himself to me wholeheartedly. No restraints. No holding back.
I closed my eyes and leaned into his touch. “Thank you,” I whispered, and turned to kiss the inside of his tattooed wrist.
As though a switch had flipped, the hand that had been so gentle a moment earlier clasped my jaw, forcing my eyes to Vaughn’s. There was no uncertainty in his expression now. Only the firm, unyielding stare of a man who demanded my compliance in the bedroom. My inner walls clenched because it was a look that told me he was about to ruin me in the best possible way.
“Get on your back, and spread those pretty thighs for me again.”
I did, and gave zero resistance when he climbed onto the bed and pushed my knees wider.
“Just look at you,” he said in a gravelly tone, eyes locked on my pussy as he parted my lips with a delicate stroke of his finger. “Good enough to eat.” He used his hot tongue to trace the same path.
Sweet baby Jesus, this man’s mouth was a gift from God. Or the devil. Probably the one with horns and a tail, now that I thought about it.
I made an embarrassing mewling sound and clutched Vaughn’s hair. “You already made me come in the bath. You don’t need to do it again.”
“You think this is for you?” He chuckled like a villain plotting chaos and shook his head. “No, Gatita. This is all for me. So quit telling me what to do, and let me feast on you.”
Then he held my thighs pinned open and did exactly that. He wasn’t aiming for a quick home run. Vaughn savored me slowly, lapping up every last drop like he couldn’t get enough.
I fisted his hair, clutching at the strands eagerly as a tingling coil of warmth spread through me.
I’d thought I was tired earlier, but if Vaughn kept indulging me with his raw, unrestrained desire, I wouldn’t sleep for days.
Gently, I ghosted my fingertips across the lines of scar tissue on Vaughn’s shoulders. The muscles there bunched as though struck by a small electric shock, then relaxed when I kneaded the tattooed flesh with slow but firm hands.
I didn’t ask Vaughn if he was okay. I didn’t want to draw attention to our progress at all. What I wanted was for him to focus on this moment and how it made him feel. And I hoped that if this experience was meaningful enough, we’d start to replace his traumatic memories with fresh, beautiful ones so he could associate touch with pleasure instead of pain.
Vaughn glanced up at me, mouth parted, tongue lazily working me, tattooed hands splaying me open, and the only emotion in his dark eyes was hunger.
It didn’t take long before he had me writhing beneath him, then crying out when my release slammed into me. My hips bucked. My thighs clamped around Vaughn’s cheeks. All the while he sucked on my clit as my pussy pulsed.
Panting, I tore Vaughn’s face from between my legs and tilted his lust-hazy expression to meet my own. “I think I’m addicted to you going down on me.”
He licked his glistening lips. Licked clean the remainder of me . “I think I’m addicted to going down on you.”
“Hmm.” I smiled and dragged my fingers through his inky strands. “That’s quite a conundrum.”
“Is it?” Vaughn flicked my sensitized bundle of nerves with his tongue, and I squealed. “I could just stay down here eating you out for the rest of our days, feeding our addictions.”
I shook my head and laughed. “Come on, pussy whisperer. Get your ass up here, and fuck me until I can’t remember my own name.”
“Careful what you wish for, Gatita.” He nipped the soft flesh at my hip, making me yelp. Then he rose to meet me at the pillow and braced his forearms on either side of my head.
I cast my eyes over the fine-ass man above me. Vaughn was so much bigger than me, and his weight, cradled between my thighs, held me pinned to the bed in the most perfect way.
This close, the lines of each scar were clear, but I tried not to focus on them. Instead, I paid attention to the way those sinister tattoos molded over the hard ridges of his muscles. Vaughn’s powerful body was a work of art crafted by ink and pain. So much pain. But right now, all I allowed myself to see was the beauty in it.
“You’re stunning, you know that?” I placed my palms over Vaughn’s firm pecs and let my hands travel the broad expanse of his chest. His jaw flexed, but his eyes, locked on mine, remained calm and responsive, so I continued exploring. “Every inch of you sets me on fire. I’m so lucky this is all mine.” I needed him to know that. Needed him to believe that there wasn’t a single part of him I didn’t find devastatingly sexy.
Vaughn’s tattoos were his suit of armor, protecting his scars from prying eyes and hurtful questions. But to me, they were appealing because they were a part of him .
I kissed him, and he moaned as my tongue parted his lips and tangled with his own.
For a while, that was all we did. Just kissed.
Then he let out a shuddery breath against my lips. “More. I want you to touch me more.”
He didn’t need to ask me twice.
I trailed my palms over Vaughn’s back, then his hips and ass, and as I did, I pressed my lips to his neck, inhaling his tobacco-and-leather scent. Having unrestricted access to his body was like being a child unsupervised in a candy shop. I wanted to grab everything all at once and ravage him.
I wrapped my legs around him and dug my heels into his lower back, urging him closer. “Please, Vaughn.” I rubbed my slick core against his length.
“Please what?” He shifted his hips, trapping his cock between us and denying me what I craved.
“Asshole,” I joked. “Are you going to make me ask for it every time?”
“Yes, Gatita.” He kissed me softly. “I need to hear you say those words, because no matter how many times we fuck, I still can’t believe a woman as incredible as you would want anything to do with me. So tell me. Tell me exactly what you want from me.”
This beautiful man. He really had no idea how wonderful he was. I wanted to spend my life reminding him how brave, selfless, and giving he was. How despite his prickly, bossy personality, when he loved, he loved hard and passionately. We just needed to make it through the coming days so I’d have the opportunity to make him realize all that.
“Please, Vaughn. I want you so far inside me that I can’t breathe. I want you to fill me up so badly I might go crazy if you don’t?—”
He slammed into me with one powerful stroke, leaving me gasping and struggling to accommodate him. If I weren’t so wet, it might’ve hurt, but I was a slippery mess for this man, so there was no pain, just an overwhelming fullness.
“Is that better?” Vaughn sucked on my neck as he surged into me again. “Am I giving you what you need?”
“Yes,” I hissed, and rocked against him.
“Your greedy little pussy was aching for me, wasn’t it?”
I tossed my head back on the pillow and flung my forearm over my eyes. “Jesus, Vaughn. Your filthy mouth is gonna make me come again already.”
“Not yet.” He pulled my arm from my face and pinned it above my head. “But when you do, you’ll be looking me in the eye and screaming my name.”
Before I had a chance to tell him I didn’t think people actually called out their lover’s name in the throes of an orgasm, Vaughn sat up, pulling me along until he rested on his haunches with me straddling his lap. Somehow, he kept us joined the whole time.
If Vaughn had reservations about me being wrapped around him, he didn’t let them show. He only tugged me closer so that my stomach and breasts squashed against his muscled torso. We couldn’t possibly have more skin in contact.
He kissed me, hot and hard, and slowly rocked my hips over his. I took his lead and rolled my pelvis to the same rhythm, and—oh my God—riding him like this was divine .
His hands roamed my body, encouraging me to move with him. When he leaned in to suck on my nipple, tingles shot straight to my core.
This was what I’d yearned for. Vaughn in my arms while buried deep inside me. The two of us entwined and connected as closely as two people could possibly be.
“Look at you. You’re a goddess. You taking me is the sexiest fucking thing I’ve ever seen.” Vaughn’s gaze dropped to where his cock slid in and out of me. A low rumbling sound came from his throat, and his eyes flared before returning to mine with unnerving intensity. “This moment, you and me, I’m sending it straight to core memories so I can remember it forever. How beautiful you are. How perfect you feel in my arms.” He clasped the nape of my neck, fingers tangled in my hair. “You undo me, Hope. In so many ways, you strip me bare until there’s nothing left but my soul. You feel like heaven. You feel like a lifeline. More than anything, you feel like home, and it’s the only place in the world I want to exist.”
My eyes stung, and a thick knot lodged in my throat. I wanted to tell Vaughn that he was my safe place, too, and undeniably my person. But I was so overcome with emotion that the words stalled on my tongue.
“Vaughn…I?—”
“Shh.” He silenced me by pressing his lips to mine. “You don’t need to say anything. Just tell me you’re mine.”
I moaned when he drove into me with extra force. “I’m yours.”
“You mean it?” Vaughn’s brows pinched as he searched my eyes for any sign of uncertainty.
The vulnerable side of this domineering man made my chest tighten. He’d suffered unimaginable physical and emotional pain. Witnessing his ironclad walls come down for me was humbling and left me wanting to protect him as much as he protected me.
“Yes, Vaughn.” I took his face in my hands, stroking the dark stubble on his cheeks. “Everything I have, everything that I am, is yours. Only yours.”
He pressed his forehead to mine, closed his lids, and exhaled a ragged breath. “Fuck, baby. You don’t know how much I needed to hear that.”
Silly man. Did he really think I hadn’t fallen for him, too?
Then his mouth was on mine, delivering a breathtaking kiss while using sheer strength to lift my ass and drive in hard from below. If I’d thought being on top gave me control, I’d been wrong. So, so wrong.
“Fucking need you, woman,” Vaughn growled against my lips.
Both of us panted as he took me hard and fast. Just the way I liked it.
“Fucking need you more than the air in my lungs.”
Then it was all too much. Vaughn’s words. His relentless pace. The way my clit dragged against his pelvis on every thrust.
A light sweat glistened on his brow. “Say it,” he demanded, holding my gaze. “Tell me who you belong to.”
“You, Vaughn,” I cried out as my heart thundered in my rib cage.
Then I came apart in his arms. I dug my fingertips into his back as if clinging to the ledge of a skyscraper.
“That’s it, Gatita. Come on your man’s cock. Show me how much you love this.”
But I was already lost to my bliss, unable to do anything other than hang on for the most amazing ride of my life with the man who meant everything to me. Then Vaughn found his own release, roaring like a feral beast throughout his final deep thrusts.
I stroked my fingers through his tousled damp hair as unfathomable happiness swelled in my chest. I’d dreamed of having something like this all my life, never believing it would be possible. Not with my family, and definitely not with how fatal it was for a man to be in my life. But Vaughn didn’t care who my father was, and he laughed in the face of death.
Somehow, in a small fishing village in the far south of Mexico, I’d found the perfectly imperfect man for me.