9. Charlotte
After lunch with Alice, we parted ways as I headed down to the day care to get Theo registered. Alice had pulled a favour in with her friend so I was able to do my trial shift the next afternoon. I spent the rest of the afternoon sending off more enquires for potential places to live. For now, the hotel room felt like a fun little holiday, but I was aware that fun would soon run out. We viewed a few of the properties the next morning before my shift. There was only one that looked promising enough for us to live within my price range. I tried to ignore the negative feelings rising up as I put in the application. If it didn’t work out there would be more. Besides, I was going to ace this trial shift and everything would find its own way of working out. If I allowed myself to think it was going to go badly, then it would. I needed to remain positive.
I recognised that attitude as being very much like my grandma Lily. She was the one who engrained it in me to stay positive. I had lost my way with that recently, but I was determined to bring that side back out. Theo needed me to be that mother for him as much as I needed to be it for myself.
It dawned on me as I took Theo to day care the next day that I had never left him anywhere like this before. Occasionally over the years, Adam’s parents or a neighbour had watched him whilst we were out, but not complete strangers. Not in this kind of environment. I knew he was confident enough to excel in the situation, but it did nothing to stop my anxiety. I watched as he ran off, making a beeline straight for Violet who was drawing in the corner. One of the carers tried to reassure me he would be okay. I guess I wasn’t doing a good job at hiding my nerves. It did nothing to calm the guilt that was rising up inside of me.
Being a stay-at-home mother was never in my plans. Being a mother at all hadn’t really been in my sights, either. Adam and I weren’t exactly the most careful, so I guess I shouldn’t have been that surprised to get pregnant in college. He was a little bit older than me and something about that captivated me. Adam was always so charming when we first got together. His words always seemed to put me exactly where he needed me to be. When they found out I was pregnant, my parents refused to talk to me. They’ve never even met Theo. Adam simply brushed it off. He told me he was the only person I needed anyway, so it didn’t matter that my parents weren’t going to be around. I believed him at the time, although it hurt not to have my mother around on the harder days of pregnancy and parenting.
Theodore was my grandpa’s name, but everyone called him Theo. I wanted to honour him in some way for everything he’d done for me. Adam didn’t put up much of a fight with the name as long as Theo had his surname, Thompson. The name Theodore means divine gift or god’s gift. It felt fitting for my grandpa and it fit Theo, too. He may have been unexpected, but he was a gift to me. One I often wasn’t sure I deserved.
After he was born, Adam insisted I be a stay-at-home mom. He earned enough money to support us both and hated the idea of me being away from the house. I never bothered arguing with him, but I often wonder now if me being at home was less about Theo and more about his desire for control. If I wasn’t earning my own pay check and going out every day, I was easier for him to isolate, easier to manipulate. I had managed to sell some of my grandma’s jewellery before Theo and I left. It was the only way to get any money to leave.
I shook the thoughts of Adam from my head. I didn’t have time to dwell on that, I needed to focus on my trial shift. The money from the bits I sold would only go so far, I could really do with securing this job.
Jane gave me a similar, warm greeting as she had done the previous day. There was something motherly about her and it warmed my heart. It was a void that I often forgot I had in my life. She seemed to fill the role so naturally as she took the time to take me through how everything worked. After a couple hours it felt like no time had passed since my waitressing days. The people of Rosehaven were all so kind, greeting me like they would an old friend. I soon found my rhythm serving the patrons of Caffeine Central.
“Lottie!” The sound of a girl’s voice caused me to turn my head towards the door. Violet bounded up to the counter, smiling at me. I looked behind her expecting to see Alice–she had texted me good luck earlier, saying she would probably stop by for a coffee later. To my surprise, Violet was followed in by Lucas.
“Oh, hi,” I said, not doing a very good job of hiding my surprise of seeing him. Luckily, he looked just as confused as I was.
“Hey, fancy seeing you here. How do you know Violet?” he added with a soft smile.
“I bumped into Alice and Violet in the park yesterday with my son. They ended up spending most of the day together.” I smiled back. “Sorry, I didn’t realise you were her dad.”
“Oh, no,” he responded almost too quickly with a wave of his hand. “I’m her uncle, Alice is my sister. She got delayed at work so asked me to pick up Violet from day care and bring her over to the shop. Figured we’d sneak a little takeaway hot chocolate and treat on our way over.”
I was slightly relieved to find out he wasn’t Violet’s dad. Alice didn’t exactly speak too fondly about her ex. Lucas seemed like a nice guy, it would have been disappointing to find out he was one of the bad ones.
“Ah, does that mean Theo is the new best friend you were going on about?” he asked Violet. “She was going on and on last night about her new best friend she made. I never caught the name of him.”
“Oh, yeah. They were like ducks in the water together.”
“Well, I can’t say I was overly happy that she had spent all day hanging out with a boy. Although, I feel better knowing it was Theo.” Violet was hiding shyly behind his leg, clearly not enjoying being the centre of the conversation.
“She’s four,” I reassured with a chuckle.
“That’s exactly what Alice said.”
We chatted for a while longer whilst I made their drinks and packed up their treats. Lucas asked if I had been pulled over again since he last saw me, to which I informed him luckily, I had not. We talked about the café, how I got the trial shift, and about Theo and Violet’s budding friendship. Once I had finished putting everything together, I passed it over the counter towards them, earning a soft thank you from Violet.
“Well, that was incredible service, wasn’t it, Vi? Couldn’t ask for better staff to be served by,” Lucas said purposely loud, stretching his gaze towards Jane who was working behind me. He earned a laugh from her. “It was nice seeing you, I’m sure we will run into each other again,” he said. We said our goodbyes and they headed back out of the café.
The café went through a period of quiet as Jane approached me.
“So, how do we feel about making this position more permanent?” she asked. I felt my heart start to jump in my chest.
“Really, you mean it?” I needed someone to pinch me.
“Of course. You haven’t missed a beat the whole shift, we’d be lucky to have you.” We spent some time hashing out the details and expectations whilst it was quiet. Theo was already signed up for day care, so I just needed to arrange it around my shifts. After we had organised everything, I was back on the counter. I only had half an hour left before I could go pick him up. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t missing him, but the café was busy so it kept my mind off of it.
The bell on the door jingled as it opened and I found my head snapping up to see who was entering. I tried my best to keep my breath steady as my gaze found theirs.
“Well, if it isn’t Officer Sunshine,” I beamed teasingly at him. “Steal any candy from babies today?”