Chapter 26 Jules
JULES
TWO WEEKS LATER
“Tell me I need to be patient.”
Sitting on the blanket Beau had packed for our picnic date today, I leaned my back against his chest and felt his warmth surrounding me.
He kissed my shoulder and asked, “What do you need to be patient for?”
I dropped my head against his collarbone and tipped my chin up to look at him. “I want everything fixed right away.”
“With your family?”
“Yeah.”
Beau rubbed his palm lightly up and down my arm. “It’s getting better, though, isn’t it? You said Ivy called you twice, and nearly everyone’s stopped in at the bakery at least once over these last two weeks. Even your mom and dad.”
“I know. I just wish it was like it used to be.”
“I hate to say it, but I don’t think that’s ever going to happen,” he stated. “That doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. It’s just that everything is different now, so it’ll never be how it was.”
I sighed, allowing my eyes to drift away from his. “It’s so hard to adjust to this change, though. I mean, I’m grateful for the strides we’ve made, but I wish things were better between you and them.”
Beau was silent for a long time, and it got me thinking that either he didn’t want the same or that he never believed it’d happen. I was leaning toward the latter when he said, “I’m sure they just need more time.”
I had no choice but to believe he was right.
I didn’t think I could handle it if the situation never improved beyond where we were right now.
I hated to even think about it getting this bad, but at some point, if they didn’t make the effort with him, I’d have no choice but to draw a line in the sand.
I wanted to be understanding, but I also frequently thought about how they would be the only extended family our baby would have.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Just ask, angel. The answer is always going to be yes.”
“Will you tell me about them?”
“About who?”
I’d never asked him about this before, believing he would have brought it up on his own. But since he hadn’t, and I was curious, I decided to take the chance. “Your parents. You’ve only ever said one or two things about them. How long has it been since you’ve seen or spoken to them?”
Surprisingly, Beau didn’t hesitate to share. “I left when I turned eighteen, and I haven’t looked back since. But things were bad before that.”
“What happened?”
He let out a long breath. “My parents were both successful. They didn’t have the same level of wealth that I presume your parents and grandparents do, but they were well off.
It turned my mother into a bit of a monster.
There was a lot I was interested in doing as a kid that she frowned upon.
Stuff just wasn’t good enough. And she despised the skating. But I kept doing it.”
“But you were a kid, right? What did she want you to do instead?”
“Read. Study. Prepare myself for the future she expected me to have.”
I sat up and spun around. “What future is that?”
“The one where I went to school to become a doctor or lawyer.”
My brows pulled together. “Did you ever express any interest in either of those career fields?”
He chuckled. “Not at all. The only thing I wanted to do was skate.”
“Well, you made that happen. Wasn’t she proud of you for making your dreams come true?”
Beau shook his head. “Are you kidding me? She hated it from the start, but after things happened with my dad and her, it was even worse. She refused to take part in anything I did unless I was willing to go to school to follow her path. I was only going to be as good as the things I could do that she could brag about.”
“But you’re a professional skateboarder. That’s a big deal, isn’t it?”
“Not to her.”
I sighed, feeling such sadness. I couldn’t imagine ever doing such a thing to my child. “I think it’s amazing. And if our baby wants to skate like you, I would be so proud.”
“Or if he or she wants to bake like you, that’d be okay, too.”
“No matter what, we’ll love this baby.”
He smiled at me and promised. “Of course, we will.”
“So, what happened with your dad?”
A look of disgust washed over him. “I’m not quite sure who was worse between the two of them.
I don’t believe that there’s any excuse for my father to do what he did, but I can admit that I used to wonder if it was my mom being so ridiculously strict and unwavering about everything that pushed him away.
I honestly don’t know the details, because he refused to share.
But when I was fourteen, I learned that my father had a whole separate family on the side.
Two kids and a girlfriend, since he was still legally married to my mom.
He’d tried to get me to meet my half-siblings, but I refused.
They aren’t much younger than me, and all I could think as a teenager was that instead of doing things to help support me in my life, my dad was doing that for these other kids.
I hated them from the beginning, even if I can look back at it now and understand that none of it was their fault.
I don’t feel any connection to my parents, not the way I think a kid should, so I certainly don’t feel any loss by not meeting his other children. ”
I couldn’t even begin to imagine how he must have felt as a teenager.
While he was going through what had to be one of the most impressionable times of his life, his parents were making him feel anything but loved.
It all made sense now why he’d said he didn’t believe in love.
I couldn’t blame him, not when the two people who should have cared the most for him didn’t.
“I’m so sorry for what you endured at such a young age,” I told him.
He’d been resting his weight back on his palms behind him. But he sat up, wrapped his arms around me, and kissed my neck. “Thanks, Jules, but I’m okay now. Everything worked out for me far better than I could’ve ever imagined. I’m not the least bit upset about my life.”
“That’s good. I’m glad. Oh—”
My hand flew to my stomach as Beau worried, “What? What’s wrong?”
I reached for his hand, placed it on my belly, and said, “The baby is kicking. I think you could feel it now.”
Beau’s eyes widened in disbelief as he kept his whole body still and waited. Seconds passed, and I started to think it wouldn’t happen again, but then, one strong kick right to his hand.
His jaw fell open. “Oh my God. I felt it.”
The baby kicked again.
“He did it again.”
“He?”
Beau shrugged. “It’s just my feeling. I’d be okay if it was a girl, too.” He looked down at his hand and stared in such disbelief.
I leaned back on my palms like he’d just been as Beau shifted his whole body to bring his face close to where his hand was. “Can you hear us? We’re your parents.”
As though having a conversation with his or her father, our baby kicked Beau’s hand a third time. Tears filled his eyes as he stroked his fingers lightly across my belly. “This is the most amazing thing I’ve ever experienced.”
I smiled, resting my hand on the top of his head.
For so long, I’d been experiencing all the changes with this pregnancy.
Beau had gotten the pregnancy test, an exhausted wife, her unwelcoming family, and hearing the baby’s heartbeat.
Getting to witness him experiencing our baby kicking was magical.
Beau kissed my belly. “I love you, little one. I love you so much.”
Now it was my turn to get emotional.
Beau lifted his gaze to meet mine. “I love you, too, Jules. I’ve been feeling something fierce for you for a long time now, but I didn’t know what it was. I understand it now. And I want you to know that I love you.”
A tear slid down my cheek. “I love you, too. I feel like I’ve been falling for a while now. Despite all the doubts you’ve had about believing in love, I can assure you that you’re so good at it. At all of this.”
Keeping one hand on my belly, Beau sat up in front of me. Then he drove his other hand into my hair and said, “You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
He didn’t give me an opportunity to respond before he urged me in his direction and captured my mouth in a claiming kiss.
BEAU - THREE WEEKS LATER
“Something’s wrong.”
I thought we’d gotten through the worst of it.
Things had improved tremendously for Jules in her relationships with individual members of her family. Of course, it wasn’t where she wanted it to be, and she frequently mentioned that she wanted things to be better between her family and me.
I didn’t have the heart to tell her what I’d done weeks ago. How I’d convinced them to do what they were doing now. That they were only being cordial to me for her sake, not because I was suddenly growing on them. Not because they cared to have any kind of reasonable relationship with me.
It only bothered me to the extent that it upset Jules. If they never wanted to let go of their distaste for me, it wouldn’t impact me either way. I’d lived plenty of my life not being liked by my own blood relatives. A few more that I’d married into wouldn’t make me feel worse.
I had Jules. She loved me. And that was more than enough for me.
I needed nothing else but her and this baby.
But I could’ve sworn I’d heard panic in her voice.
A soft hand landed on my shoulder and shoved me. “Beau.”
Never had I heard my name spoken with such agony before. I shot up. “What? What’s going on?”
“Something’s wrong.”
I glanced at the clock beside the bed.
Just a few minutes past three o’clock in the morning. No wonder I was so disoriented. “What?”
“Something isn’t right,” she said, a groan of pain escaping.
“With the baby?”
Jules tossed back the blanket and exited the bed. I reached over and flipped on the light. By the time I turned back to face her, she let out a cry of pain and doubled over.
I was out of bed and by her side in a flash. I’d never felt such terror before in my whole life. “What’s wrong?”
She was hissing through her teeth, her eyes squeezed shut, and one hand resting on her belly as the other pressed into the mattress.