41. BEN
41
BEN
T elling my parents we were engaged was a shock. They hadn’t even known I’d had someone in my life. But I’d always kept things from them, thinking that my life didn’t have enough worth to share much.
That was going to change. I still had some learning to do, some changes to make—knowing what my mistakes were was one thing, getting out of old habits was another.
But I had time, and that would all come.
Of course, I had to show Sofia off to my family.
My dad had met Sofia once in passing, but knowing I was engaged had called for a family meeting with her included.
It had gone amazingly. My parents loved her. And so had Charlotte. She’d pulled Sofia in, making her feel like part of the family already.
I’d always known Charlotte had been a great addition to the family, but she’d just proved herself again when she’d set Sofia at ease.
Telling my family Sofia was pregnant had caused another shocked, ripples of uncertainty, but Charlotte had been the one to step up and toast to the new family member.
She’d done everything to make us feel like it was okay.
Telling my mom the wedding would be in less than a month hadn’t been a problem, either. It had been a challenge. I’d told her that she didn’t have to make a big deal out of it, but she went all out, anyway. Charlotte had helped her, and Amy had jumped in, too.
And now, I stood in my old room at the Blackwood Mansion, folding a bow tie in the mirror.
Alex lounged in a chair, and Chris sat on the bed. Daniel came in with a tray of drinks.
“You’re a crazy son of a bitch,” Alex said when Daniel handed me my drink. “I thought that the whole story with Charlotte was crazy, but you took it to the next level. Always trying to outshine me, huh?”
“Not even trying ,” I said with a sniff, and we both laughed.
Things with Alex were different now. We’d always been in competition with each other. Or rather, I’d been in competition with him.
I’d started realizing that he’d never really competed with me. I’d been the one feeling worthless and so I’d always thought that Alex was the golden boy, the standard to reach.
I’d been so wrong.
Now that I knew who I was and what I was worth, looking toward the future instead of the past, Alex and I had become a lot closer as brothers, not as competitors. We only joked about it now.
“I still don’t know how you pulled it off getting Mom to plan a wedding in a month,” Chris said. “I mean, you’ve pulled crazy stunts and put this family through a lot, but that…”
“Hey, I was okay getting married in court.”
“Mom would die before she lets that happen,” Daniel said.
I shrugged. “I still didn’t ask her to go crazy.”
“No, but you know what she’s like. And this is going to look good in front of her friends, too,” Chris said.
I chuckled. We all knew my mom loved doing stuff like this. Yeah, the timeline had been a little short, but that had only spurred my mom on more, and she’d really given it her all.
Luke arrived, wearing his suit, too.
“Eh, looking sharp,” he said when he saw me and shook my hand. “Well done. Turns out you can look decent.”
“Fuck off,” I laughed.
Luke shook my brothers’ hands, and we bantered back and forth for a bit before it was time to head to the chapel.
“The limo is here,” Alex said, glancing at his phone.
I nodded and my stomach twisted for a second, but these were the good kinds of nerves. I was about to marry the woman of my dreams.
We filed out of the room. I stepped out last, throwing back the last of my drink and shrugging into my jacket.
Dad waited for me. He looked dapper in a gray tailored suit, his hair and beard neatly trimmed.
“Ready to go?” I asked.
“In a minute,” he said. “I want to have a quick word.”
I stopped and nodded.
Dad studied me with steely eyes, and I was just about to ask if I was in trouble when he started speaking.
“I’m proud of you, Ben.”
I blinked at him, suddenly emotional.
“You’ve grown, you’ve come into your own, and I know it was hard. We all have our demons to fight, and I know you boys have more than the average man’s demons to bear. But you’ve done so well, and you’ve become more than the sum of your parts. And I’m proud of you.”
“Dad…” I didn’t know what to say. My voice threatened to catch in my throat.
“I know that it’s been hell and you came from a shit place. You started at lower than zero, and you fought your way up. It takes some longer than others, but you did it, and I’m proud to call you my son. Do you hear? You’re going to be a good man to Sofia and a good father to your child.”
He grabbed me, hugging me, and for a second, he held onto me.
And this was it. The moment when I understood.
I was a Blackwood. I might have come from somewhere else, but I wasn’t whoever that little boy had been that those people had given away.
I was Benjamin Blackwood, about to be a husband and a father, and I had the perfect role model to follow to know how to be a dad.
“Thank you,” I whispered.
Dad finally let go of me, and we both blinked a few times.
“Let’s get going. We shouldn’t keep your bride waiting.”
I smiled at him when he clapped me on the back, and we walked to the limo together.
Inside, the others were already waiting, and when we sat down, I’d never felt more part of a family than I did right now.
The chapel was bustling with people. Mom had gone all out, and the guest list was larger than five-hundred people, all available at such short notice. But no one wanted to miss a Blackwood wedding.
I greeted a few people close by as I walked through the crowds. They were still filing into the chapel. I spotted a group of people, all Sofia’s family. We’d flown to Oregon shortly after Sofia had met my family, and I’d been introduced to hers, too. Now, they’d all come to see us get married. Mom had insisted on paying for everyone—airfare, transport, accommodation.
After all, they would be family, too, now.
I walked into a side door of the chapel with my entourage in tow. Luke was my best man, and my three brothers stood with me, too.
The priest shook my hand, and then I had to wait for time to slowly tick by until all the guests were seated.
I glanced at my watch.
“She’ll be here,” Luke said, his hand on my shoulder. “You know she will.”
I nodded. Of course, I knew. I just wanted her here with me, her hand in mine. I wanted to call her my wife.
The music started, and everyone stood.
This was it.
When the doors opened, Elena, Charlotte, and Amy walked in first, followed by one of Sofia’s cousins, who was also a bridesmaid.
Then Sofia appeared with her father.
She looked like a vision in a lace dress that hugged her figure, showing off her curves in an elegant way. Her hair had been done up in a complicated do that only made her delicate features stand out, and her mercury eyes locked on mine.
As she walked to me to the beat of the music, everyone aww’d about her dress, snapping photos, but we only had eyes for each other.
I stepped down and met her as soon as she was at the front.
“Thank you,” I said to her father and shook his hand.
“I couldn’t have chosen a better man to look after my girl,” he said. “Welcome to the family.”
I smiled, and Sofia took my hand. We stepped forward, the two of us ready to be married.
I barely heard a word the priest said. I couldn’t stop staring at my beautiful bride, the soon-to-be mother of my child, the woman I would spend the rest of my life with.
When it was time for vows, I turned to Sofia and cleared my throat.
“I’m not a man of many words,” I said. “Almost everyone who knows me can attest to that. So my speech won’t be a long one, my vows won’t be complicated. All I can say is that I promise I will always be here. I’ll hold your hand, catch you when you fall, be a pillar of support for you to lean on, and be your biggest fan. You’ve taught me a lot about myself the last couple of months, but the biggest thing you showed me was that it’s okay to love. And, my darling Sofia, babe, I love you so fucking much.”
Everyone chuckled when I swore.
Oops.
Sofia’s eyes shimmered, and she blinked hard to get her tears to go away and not ruin her makeup.
“Ben,” she said. “Benjamin Blackwood, man of my dreams. All my life I dreamed of someone, knowing that there has to be a happy ending out there, that there has to be the kind of life they write about. It was only recently that I realized that man was you. I went through life thinking that I could do it alone, and as long as I was alone, I believed I was doing a fine job of it. But when I met you, and we started out as a couple…” Her eyes locked on mine, and we shared our inside joke—the lie, the game, the ruse—“I realized that I wasn’t doing that great at being alone after all. All I wanted was to be with you. And how else than to spend the rest of our lives together? So, I promise to love you, even though you’re grumpy. I promise to taste all your coffees, even if they’re not my favorite.” The crowd chuckled at that, and I grinned at her. “And I promise to give myself to you, every day, for the rest of our lives. You have my heart, and you always will. Ben, you’re everything.”
Everyone was teary by the time we slid our rings onto our fingers. I’d ordered a band that complemented the ring on her finger, and Sofia’s ring to me was inscribed on the inside.
I could never just pretend with you.
I smiled when she slid it on.
And then the priest said the words I’d been waiting to hear since I proposed in the car.
“I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”
I pulled Sofia close and pressed my lips against hers.
The rest of the world fell away, and it was just the two of us.
Happy.
In love.
Married.