Reckless

Chapter 15

“It’s not that hard.”

I’m holding onto the armrests and give Jude an incredulous look. “You’re driving in a straight line on a back road no one ever uses.”

“But that’s more or less what a highway is, right?” he smirks.

“Focus on the road,” I admonish, and he grins, but does as he is told.

We’ve been driving up and down the same stretch of road for the last half hour. I’m surprised we found a place to practise, but there is a lot of wide-open space in South Dakota. Luckily, we’ve yet to encounter anyone on the road. It’s wide enough that two vehicles can pass, so I’m not too worried.

I have to take over when we need to turn because he’s not used to the sheer length and swing, but I promised he can try on the next go around.

“You always have to be aware of the blind spots,” I tell him again. “Keep checking your mirrors, especially the blind spot mirror.”

“Yeah, I know. I am.”

He puts his foot down on the gas a little harder, so we pick up some speed. He’s grinning from ear to ear. I don’t have the heart to tell him to ease off. We’re fine for now with no one around us to worry about.

I must admit, he’s taken to it quickly. I still don’t trust him to park my baby, but driving along the highway, he might be okay.

When we first got here, I made him walk around the entire RV. He was like a restless little kid, wanting to get behind the wheel, but driving an RV is so much more than operating from the driver’s seat, and it is non-negotiable. He quietened down after that and paid attention.

You have to know the dimensions of the RV, the blind spots, the tail swing and, as obvious as it might be, the height of the vehicle. I’ve seen people driving RVs into gas stations before now get wedged on the roof. If he’s going to learn, he’s going to do it right.

After another couple of runs, I let him turn and even though he does it slowly, he doesn’t do any damage, or drive us off the road.

“Can I?” he asks, bouncing in the seat.

We’re approaching the road that will take us back to the highway. It’s narrower than this and there are a couple of tight turns, but I give him the go ahead.

“Just promise if we get stuck, you’ll move your ass and let me take over.”

“Relax, I got this.”

“Hmm.”

Give him his due, he concentrates as we get back onto a more populated road and even though I’m squeezing my nails into my palms, he gets us onto the I-90 with no mishaps. I remind him of the speed limit and to stay in the correct lane. We will not be overtaking anyone.

Eventually, I relax my death grip and enjoy the fact I’m not driving for a change. The whole point of him driving was to give me a chance to get writing done, but I’m still not ready to give him total control.

The plan is to drive straight through to Sioux Falls. I’m not meeting up with my friends until tomorrow, so I let Jude decide what he wants to do today when we arrive. He picked Falls Park.

I understand why. When we’re in outdoor, wide-open spaces, there is less chance of people focusing on him over the sights. I’m not averse to it. I love nature. I wish he could experience some of the other things the city has to offer, but we could never stroll into one of the breweries or museums without him being recognized.

The good thing is there is plenty to do in Falls Park, including hiring bikes, which I plan on doing when we get there.

“Tell me about your friends, the ones you’re meeting tomorrow,” he says.

“We all met in college. Drew and Wayne have been together since sophomore year. They got married three years ago. We catch up twice a year, I go to them and vice versa. And we always do the same thing when we’re here.”

“What’s that?” he asks, glancing at me, then straight back to the road.

“There’s a club we always go to. It’s chill, exclusive, lots of tequila and champagne.”

Not exactly the entire story, but it’s all I’ll say right now.

“You mean you go out with your college buddies and get trashed?”

“More or less.”

“I can’t picture you wasted. You’re too… grown up.”

“What does that mean?” I twist the chair to face him. “Are you saying I’m old?”

“No, of course not. I’m saying you have your head screwed on, you’re responsible. I’ve been with you the last five days and all I’ve seen you drink is that fake alcohol, watered down swill you call beer.”

“It’s not that bad.”

He gives me a look. Okay, it is that bad. “I don’t drink because a lot of the time I’m driving. I want to keep a clear head. Believe me, I’ve seen enough accidents on my travels to know it’s not worth risking it.”

“But your night with your friends is the exception? Tell me it isn’t something that only happens once a year. Everyone needs to loosen up now and then.”

“We’re not all rockstars going to lavish parties every other weekend.”

“True,” he nods.

Jude does a good job of hiding it, but I can see he’s wondering about where he fits in. Do I keep him a secret? Ask him to stay in the RV. Or do I invite him along? Drew will kill me if I do it without letting her know first, so I should figure out what I’m doing.

The idea of leaving him behind like a dog waiting for its master to return doesn’t sit right with me. Bringing him along may make a statement neither one of us is prepared to make. Or maybe I’m reading too much into it.

The truth is, it will be different with Jude around.

There is the added complication of me parking the RV at their place. They have a big house with a lot of land, plenty of room for me to park the RV. I usually spend the night in one of their guest rooms.

I won’t be able to hide Jude Smallwood.

My initial thought was to ask him to check into a hotel for the night, but I feel like a complete shit for thinking of it. Especially given what happened between us last night. And this morning. Best not to think about that.

“Do they know about me?” Jude asks, like he can read my mind. “Do any of your friends know I’m with you?” His voice sounds more cautious with that last question.

“No,” I admit. “I want to protect your privacy. I wouldn’t want it getting out you’re with me because you’re keeping a low profile. My friends wouldn’t run to the papers, but the fewer people who know, the easier it is to control.”

He nods but doesn’t speak.

Is he bothered I haven’t told my friends? I would have thought he’d prefer to keep this from as many people as possible. As far as I’m aware, he has only told one person he’s travelling with me, but not who I am. Apart from his manager.

I’ve purposely not mentioned Jude to Emily because she is a huge fan of Reckless Soul. If I swore her to secrecy, she wouldn’t tell. It’s best not to put her in that position.

We haven’t been in touch for the past couple of days. I’m sure she’s busy with her own thing. She PAs for another author too, but she is eventually going to get back in touch to check in.

After a couple more miles, I suggest we get gas. Jude gets a determined look on his face that has me worried. I should take over driving, but he’s going to argue. Luckily, I know a gas station that has no roof over the pumps and caters to larger vehicles. It’s about three miles outside of Sioux Falls.

When we reach it, Jude follows my directions to a suitable space for the RV.

“Yes,” he pumps the air. “And you said I couldn’t do it.”

“You want to pump the gas too?”

“Don’t dampen my excitement, Krista.”

“I’m serious. You can pump while I go in and grab a few things and pay.”

“Oh. Okay. I’m still proud of myself,” he adds.

I get out of my seat and lean over the back of his chair, kissing his cheek. “I’m proud of you too.”

He laughs. God, how can I possibly disappoint him by sending him away while I see my friends? I grab my purse and phone while Jude slips into the bedroom. When he comes back out, he’s wearing the cowboy hat.

My reaction should be to laugh. It was meant to be a joke, after all. I’m sure that is what he is expecting, but it isn’t what happens.

Jesus. I never thought I’d have a cowboy fetish. I guess I do. My body is warm all over and I get a tingling low down in my stomach the more I stare at him.

Everything goes haywire inside of me when he smirks at me and taps the brim of his hat, like all the sexy cowboys in the movies do. His tight black t-shirt and dark jeans finish the look to perfection.

I shake myself out of the stupor he put me in, my cheeks flushing. He lets out a low rumble of laughter as he passes me and heads for the door. He looks back at me just before he steps out and winks.

“Oh boy,” I mutter, clenching my thighs. I put a hand over my chest, imagining him wearing it in bed. And nothing else. I almost hear him saying, come ride your cowboy .

It would be wrong to pull him into the bedroom at a gas station. So wrong. But…

“You coming?” Jude pops his head back in. That knowing look is still on his face.

“I could be,” I mumble.

“Heard that,” he disappears again.

While Jude pumps the gas, I head towards the convenience store and call Drew.

“Hey girl, you here yet?” she answers.

“Not far. Stopped for gas.”

“Can’t wait to see your face. We’re gonna have so much fun tomorrow night.”

“Yeah, I am excited too.”

There is a brief pause. “What aren’t you telling me?”

“Nothing. What makes you say that?”

“I’ve known you for years, spent three years sleeping in the same room as you, Krista. I know there is something you’re not saying. Spill it.”

Someone says something in the background and a muffled sound comes through the phone, like she’s covered it with her hand. I wait, used to this. Drew is always getting interrupted. Except on our nights out. That is a no business allowed time.

“I’m back. What’s going on?”

“Okay, well… There is something.”

“Knew it. Come on, tell your big sis.”

“You’re three weeks older than me.”

“Still older. Come on, I’m getting hounded by three losers who can’t make a simple decision between them. I don’t know what the hell we pay them for.”

I laugh. She’s referring to Wayne and his brothers. Not one of them is a loser. Xander the youngest, flirts with me whenever I see him. One of them is married and his oldest is, or was, a player. I haven’t heard much about him lately.

“So… I might bring someone with me tomorrow.”

She squeals so loud I have to move the phone. A woman in the aisle with me turns to look. I give her a pained smile and turn away. “Burst my ear drum, why don’t you?”

“This is a momentous occasion, Krista. You’re bringing someone to meet us. Why do I sound like a proud parent?”

“Don’t get carried away. It’s not like that.”

“You’re not bringing a guy?”

“Well yes.”

“So, how is it not like that?”

“Because it’s not.”

“I don’t get it.”

“If you’d let me get a word in, I can explain.”

“Hmm. Fine, go on then.”

Drew has always been the same way. I don’t think anyone can ever get through telling her something without her interrupting at least three times. Wayne finds her endearing and I’m so damn used to it, it’s become banter more than annoying. We play off each other. Wayne says it’s like watching a table tennis match when we get going.

“It’s a strange story and I don’t have a lot of time to tell you about it.”

“Just the facts then.”

“I picked up a guy in Montana.”

“Picked him up. Like a hitchhiker?”

“Kind of.”

“Krista Iren Benke, you picked up a hitchhiker ? Are you insane?”

The full name. Now it really does feel like I’m talking to my mother.

“He isn’t a hitchhiker, and he isn’t an axe murderer. I knew who he was.”

“Oh…” the rant she was gearing up for pauses. “Who is he?”

“Well… That’s the weird part. And you need to know everything before we arrive tomorrow.”

“Xander, get the fuck out. Go be a brand manager and pick the design that best suits the business. Cole, I don’t care about which tropical island you want to buy. They’re all the same. Just make sure our lawyers check the details. And Wayne, I love you, but go away. I have important business here.”

“Hey Krista!”

“Tell him hi,” I roll my eyes. Xander is like a puppy dog.

“Okay, they’re out of my hair. I can focus for five minutes. Now, who is this guy?”

I pause, not for dramatic effect, because I’m not sure how to say it. Through the window, I see Jude standing next to the RV with his phone. He’s still wearing the cowboy hat and I can’t help but smile. Pulling my eyes away I take a deep breath.

“Jude Smallwood.”

It’s met with silence. For a second, I think we’ve been cut off. I can’t picture Drew speechless.

“Krista, did you kidnap a rockstar?”

“No!” I cry out and a few people look over. I hurry to a further corner of the store. “Not technically. He asked if he could come with me.”

“And you let him? A stranger,” her voice holds mock surprise.

So what if I’m a cautious person by nature? Like I told Jude when he first showed up, you can never be too careful. I trusted him and I’m glad I did. I briefly explain how I came to meet a rockstar in the middle of a forest in Montana.

I keep most of the personal stuff to myself. She doesn’t need to know Jude’s private issues.

“Just because he’s famous doesn’t mean he’s not an asshole though, babe.”

“Yes, I know, and I was very careful. But Drew, he’s not an asshole. He’s…” I trail off, realizing how dreamy my tone was. Wrong person to let that slip to.

“Oh. My. Gawd.”

“Stop it.”

“You like him.”

“He’s nice, nothing like he’s portrayed in the media.”

“Did you fuck him?”

“He’s funny, kind, and he needed a safe space.”

“You so fucked him.”

“Can you stop saying that?”

“You’re so determined not to answer my questions. How can I stop asking them? Don’t you know me at all?”

“I know you far too well. That is why I’m pleading the fifth.”

I glimpse my reflection in the fridge's glass. My cheeks are flushed. I tuck the phone between my ear and shoulder and pull the door open so I don't have to keep looking at myself.

“Ok, I’ll stop. For now,” she backs down. “But I will set that glorified trailer home on fire if you lie to me. So he’s crashing our weekend?”

I ignore her threats and putting down my top of the line, expensive RV. “I don’t want to leave him in the RV while we go out partying.”

“Can you imagine, we’re all hanging out having fun and a rockstar is locked in there. Do you tie him up when you leave?”

A sigh is my response.

“Gag him?”

“Drew.”

She laughs. “Okay fine. Can he be seen out in public?”

“You know Wayne won’t let anyone see him. It’s one of the few reasons I’m friends with you people.”

“Ha. I mean it. Real talk Krista, the press are saying he’s stolen money from his record label and vanished.”

“What?”

That isn’t what Jude has been telling me. Admittedly I’ve not checked up myself. I didn’t see the point of reading all that bullshit when I know none of it is true.

“They’re saying he is a part of it?”

“They’re speculating ,” she corrects. “But you know how the press is. They’re running with it. So, did he?”

“Of course he didn’t. That was all their manager. Who is a giant prick, by the way.”

“You met him?”

“Yeah. That’s not important, none of it. You, more than anyone, know not to believe the shit the media prints, Drew.”

A while ago there was a scandal in Wayne’s family, and it took a long time to die down. They’re still feeling the effects a year later, and Wayne’s oldest brother has disappeared completely from public view. Not because he did anything wrong, it’s because he lost his faith in humanity.

“Well, if you trust him, he is welcome, but I reserve the right to make my own judgment.”

“I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

The door to the fridge closes. This time when I see my reflection, I’m smiling.