Chapter 19 Weston
Weston
“We can definitely make that happen for you,” Trenton Von Harrill is telling Roman now as they make a toast with Scotch.
Roman just opened one of the gifts they brought for him, which was a bottle of single malt that probably cost more than some people’s rent.
All around us the event is in full swing, more opulent than I’ve ever seen it before.
And inside, I’m dying.
Noah’s parents are known for their obscenely stylish events and displays of wealth.
Ever since his mom and dad got divorced, they both donate money like they’re trying to compete with each other, too.
Noah comes from a family with a ton of siblings and disgusting generational money, but the silver lining is that they tend to spend heavy amounts on charitable causes and donations instead of hoarding every dime they lay a hand on.
I should be enjoying myself.
But I feel like I’m…
About.
To fucking.
Blow.
All I want to do is make up for the past wrongs that my father committed.
I’m constantly trying to prove myself and distance my image from the memory of my father forever.
And over and over again, that feels impossible.
I keep glancing over at the asshole across the table from Sev, wearing Dad’s gaudy cufflinks and acting like he belongs here.
I have to be here at my table, where Roman is having crucial conversations with these business executives that I couldn’t care less about.
Noah poured heavy into my last drink and the world seems to be spinning around me even worse than it was before.
And it’s all just more pressure.
Pressure I thought would dissipate after my father died.
Pressure I thought I could escape.
But I’m still dragged in a million directions, hopeless against the current, in a world I never even got to choose.
Noah’s chatting with a CEO, explaining to her all about his own problems that pale in comparison, talking about how he’s worried about having a stepbrother soon.
No one knows that this dinner could explode at any moment.
“I think we can arrange a yacht party this summer,” Von Harrill is saying now, addressing me and Roman. “Do you think it would be a good arrangement, in addition to the other arrangements?”
“Perfection,” Roman says.
I nod like I’m listening, even though I’m barely there.
Von Harrill is smiling wide and everyone seems far too happy in contrast to the storm inside me.
I feel like I’m clinking glasses with royalty as the Titanic is starting to sink underneath us. Or like we’re on the brink of a massive, ground-shattering earthquake, yet everyone else is acting like we’re untouchable.
When I see Niko stand up and stride toward the paned glass doors that lead to the back deck, my senses heighten.
And then I see the stranger in cufflinks stand up, too.
Looking at Niko.
Following him outside.
I need air.
I need air.
Just fucking say it, just talk, just speak—
“Going to get some air,” I finally manage to say out loud, standing up and gripping the back of my chair as I stand.
Sevan’s already gotten up and crossed the elegant ballroom, snaking his way through caterers and groups of people walking around, tailing the stranger.
“We’re only just getting started,” Roman says, cutting me a glance that I’m sure is supposed to make me sit the fuck back down.
“I’ll be back soon,” I tell him, breaking eye contact before taking off across the ballroom.
I keep my sights locked on the back of Sev’s body, following him like he’s a beacon in the dark, my heart pounding like I’m about to jump from a tall building.
Don’t do this for me, I’m begging on the inside.
If Niko gets hurt, I’ll feel like it’s my fault.
If Sevan gets hurt… I’ll know it’s my fault.
I need all of this to end.
And if I’m the one who gets hurt in the process, then at least I’ll escape the guilt that pools on my conscience like toxic sludge.
I push through the doors that lead outside.
The air is balmy and smells like spring, fresh grass and floral scent perfuming the air.
The moon is low, and the back deck of the ballroom is lit with lanterns along the outer railing.
There’s a small outdoor bar set up at the far side, but the deck is virtually empty right now, as the dinner just began inside.
“What the hell are you doing?” I hear Sevan shout as he approaches the stranger behind Niko.
Both of them turn to look back, under the canopy of the trees flanking the deck.
“I need to have a little talk with Niko,” the guy says. “A private talk.”
“After what I heard you say at that party, you’re not getting anywhere near Niko.”
“Who the fuck are you?” I roar as I approach them.
“Great. One of Knox’s legitimate sons wants to come stick his nose in this, too?” the guy says. “Does the name Cal Thorne ring a bell to you, or are you so self-absorbed you can’t remember me, either?”
Thorne.
Dad did mention someone he called Thorne, only a couple of times.
Thorne reaches into his jacket pocket and I see a flash of metal reflecting the light from the lamp post nearby.
My heart skips a beat as cold fear floods my veins.
He has a knife.
“I didn’t recognize you with the shaved head,” Niko says. “But I remember you. You were a dick to my mother every time you and that lawyer met up with her. Can’t imagine what the fuck you want with me.”
“Your dear old dad had promised me money that I never got to have,” Thorne says. “And I know you got a nice, cushy payout when Knox died.”
“He doesn’t owe you a penny,” Sevan says.
I see the gleam of the metal again as Thorne twirls the knife in his hand.
“That depends who you ask,” Thorne says.
“Why go to him?” I call out.
Sev turns to cut me a warning glance. “Stay away from him, Wes.”
“Why him, and not me?” I say louder, crossing the stone deck.
“Because you and your father have had half of the CEOs in the country bribed for years. Certainly every CEO at this dinner. You are a spoiled kid with resources. Niko, on the other hand…”
It’s like the ground is shaking beneath me.
That earthquake, causing a tectonic shift.
Sev’s expression drops into confusion, just for a split second, as he looks back at me. “That bribery claim can’t be true,” he whispers.
“We need to talk about that,” I tell him.
“Give me the money I fucking deserve, or the Crimson administration finds out everything,” Thorne says. “I don’t just have receipts. I have videos. Phone calls. Onyx House will be dead overnight.”
“You won’t do that,” I say. “If you expose what Dad did, you’ll have to answer for it, too. You were involved, weren’t you?”
Thorne glares at me. “I’ll go down with all of you. And it’ll be fucking worth it.”
He suddenly flicks the knife open and gets his arm around Niko’s neck from behind, holding him like a hostage with the blade at his throat.
My heart drops.
Sev leaps into action, gripping at Thorne’s arm.
No.
No.
Not because of me.
No one can get hurt because of me.
“The money is yours,” I call out.
It makes me sick to say it. But if this goes any further, everything will be worse.
“He’s fucking blackmailing us,” Niko says, and Thorne tightens his grip around Niko’s throat.
“I know he is,” I say. “And he’s going to succeed.”
“Look at that,” Thorne says. “Brotherly love. Didn’t know the legitimate son would be the easier one to get to. Always did seem like a bit of a doormat, Weston—”
Thorne’s words are cut off as Sev reaches back and clocks him as hard as he can in the jaw.
There’s a cracking sound that accompanies it, and I know Sev broke a bone.
“No,” I call out, lunging over as Thorne collapses to the ground, his knife clattering onto the stone. “Sev, you don’t want bad blood with this person.”
“Leave me alone,” Sev roars as he pulls back for another punch.
Blood spills from Thorne’s nose.
His jaw is already slack, and he only seems dimly conscious.
The implications of Sev’s actions are already speeding through my brain like lightning.
Sevan will be the one who gets in trouble.
Sevan could be expelled from Crimson, thrown in jail, or worse.
I don’t know who else Thorne is friends with. I don’t know who still has loyalty to my father after his death, and I stupidly, naively thought that his death meant this was all over.
“All I had to do was pay him,” I tell Sev, trying to yank him backward by his shoulders.
“Nah, Weston,” Sevan tells me, not looking me in the eye. “All you had to do was tell me the truth.”
I feel hollow.
Hollow like I felt every time I lost something important to me.
I swallow past a dry throat. “I didn’t know about the bribery until long after my father died. I only learned about it days ago. That’s the truth,” I whisper.
Thorne is lying back on the ground, groaning in pain, still bleeding while Sev looks down at him with wild eyes.
Everything is crumbling.
Everything is fucked, and somehow I feel like it’s all my fault.
“And yet you’re still working with Roman, or his family, somehow, to keep the bribery going?” Sev asks.
He still won’t look at me.
“What?” I ask.
“Kieran had his suspicions, but when he asked me to spy, I thought he was nuts. Maybe he wasn’t, Wes.”
My heart is spiraling downward inside me like a sinking stone.
“It’s not like that,” I whisper.
“Then what is it?”
My eyes defocus, then refocus again, like a lens going blurry and almost failing.
“Our plan this year was perfect,” I manage to say. “ We had a deal. Roman and I worked out a deal so we could guarantee all of the society internships would be given to Daggers and Luros members. What my father did was unfair. We needed to make it right.”
Sev is breathing heavy as he touches the side of Thorne’s face. “Hey. You conscious?” he asks.
“I’m happy as a…” Thorne starts to say before coughing. “Happy as a fucking clam, if Knox’s money is in my bank account tonight.”
“My phone is right here,” I tell Thorne, sliding it out of my pocket and holding it up like it’s some fucking olive branch. “I’ll give you my maximum transfer. And then I’ll do another one, four more times this week. Is that enough, you leech?”
Thorne just laughs from his place on the ground, blood coating his white teeth.
“Rich kids are so fucking easy. I’ll look forward to it, Knox.”
Sev stands over Thorne like he’s a bodyguard, watching his every move. Thorne tells me the username of the online account he wants the funds transferred and I put it into my banking app, my hands shaking so badly I can barely hold the phone steady.
Worth the price, if I can save Onyx from being shut down.
Onyx matters more than my personal bank account.
Sev finally looks at me.
His beautiful slate eyes that felt like they were mine.
“So you weren’t making deals to get more connections for Onyx,” Sev says. “You were trying to help the other societies?”
I take in a long breath of air.
The fresh scent of the flowerbuds on the trees feels like a mockery.
All this beautiful spring, surrounding everything, yet my own world is spiraling around me.
“Yes. And you were spying on me?” I ask, my voice feeble.
Sev’s face is grim.
I look at the rose tattoo that’s just slightly peeking out of the top of his unbuttoned collar. The bottom of the raven’s wing, at the base of his sleeve.
Everything about you that’s started to feel like home.
My throat is tight.
And I see something close to heartbreak in his eyes.
“Yes, I was,” Sevan says. “I was supposed to be spying on you, and I was falling for you, instead.”
The tectonic plates shift beneath me again.
The iceberg inside me is being turned upside down.
Like I’m about to be swallowed whole.
I can’t.
I can’t…
“I…”
My words fade in the air.
All I want is to make sense of all this. Instead I’m dissociating, like I’m free-floating somewhere above my body, watching everything in my life as it's thrown into the air.
If I look at Sev for a moment longer, I’m afraid I might actually start to believe what he said, and nothing could be scarier than that.
He doesn’t mean it.
He’s just emotional.
Sev doesn’t fall for anyone, especially not a living burden like you.
“Stop,” I hear behind me, and I recognize Noah’s voice.
A moment later, something hard connects with the side of my face. At first I don’t even register that it’s someone punching me, because it feels more like a goddamn rock hitting the side of my jaw.
“Kieran, don’t,” Sevan says, rushing to my side as I break my fall with my forearm on the stone ground.
I squint up to see Sevan blocking Kieran from punching me again at the last moment. Noah seems to have run out after him, trying to protect me.
The pain that blooms out from my jaw almost feels like a mercy.
Finally, I feel something.
Real pain.
Not floating in dissociation.
“What’s going on out here? Are you in on it, Berlant? Getting your own sweet cut of the bribe?” Kieran is roaring at Sevan. “Guess you’re loyal to your fucking boy toy now, because the hatefuck was just that good.”
“Shut your mouth,” Sev says to him, keeping him in a headlock and pulling him toward a bench. “Were you working with Thorne, Kier?”
Kieran is jerking his arms around, trying and failing to find any way to struggle out of Sev’s grip. “I have no fucking clue what you’re talking about. Who is Thorne?”
Kieran seems unhinged. Like he’s on drugs, and probably took way too much.
Noah goes in and tries to help Sev restrain him, but an erratic swing hits Noah directly in the face.
It’s a bad hit.
Kieran’s wearing a couple of rings on that hand and one of them seemed to get Niko right on the cheek, and the blow hit him directly in the nose. More blood hits the stone below us and Noah sinks to the ground, crying out in pain.
“Fuck,” he groans.
Sev’s looking over, frowning as he still tries to restrain Kieran.
“His nose is broken,” Sev says. “And he’s passing out. Call an ambulance, Wes.”