17. Chapter 17
17
A Slip Up?
I’m in the car with my sister—who’s being uncharacteristically quiet—and I have to stifle the side of myself that wants to ask her what’s wrong. After our conversation yesterday, it’s clear something is bugging her, but I’m not sure what.
She’s getting older, so maybe she thinks I’m too overbearing and I need to pull back.
Or maybe I’m not doing enough for her and our dad.
It could be any number of things, but until she talks to me about it, I don’t want to ask. If I ask and the problem is with me, then I’m only proving her point.
After the past few days I’ve had, I need something good. After Leo stood up for me at work yesterday, he went back to being an ass. I knew it wasn't going to last, but I didn't think I’d get home and see half of the hockey team from Grand Mountain in my living room. It would have been nice if Grant was over, but he wasn't. It was only Liam, Leo, and a few other people.
But it would’ve been nice to know about it before I walked in looking disheveled after staying late to finish something. I was really looking forward to watching reality television with Alissa tonight, but she’s going out with some guy she has been seeing and is sleeping over at his place.
Which means she’s getting fucked. I’m happy for her, really, I am, but not only am I not getting fucked, but I have to deal with Leo for the entire night without Liss being there to buffer.
It’s the first time Leo and I have been completely alone at the apartment, and it could go one of two ways. We could either be civil and not speak to each other all night, or we’re going to fight.
“Mom called me the other day,” my sister says, effectively breaking my mind off all thoughts of Leo.
“Our mother called you? On the phone?” Shock doesn't even begin to cover all of what I’m feeling. “What did she say?”
“She wanted to talk and catch up.”
I try to stop the laugh that comes out, but I can’t. “She wants to catch up after walking out on us? You’re telling me now she wants to talk? What did you say to her?”
Lizzie looks away, and I can’t tell what she’s thinking. She was so young when our mom left. I didn't even think she remembered much about her.
But I remember. I remember what it was like watching her walk out the door and never seeing her again. I remember what it felt like when I realized I had to be the one to step up, to keep the family afloat because it was too hard for my mother to stay.
It was really fucking easy for her to leave, and now that we’re older, she suddenly wants to be part of our lives? No. Not only is it not fucking fair, but if she left once, she would absolutely do it again.
“We talked for a bit, and it was nice, Ells. She asked about me and what has been going on, and she even asked me about you—”
I laugh again. “Lizzie, you realize she walked out on us over a decade ago, right? She can’t waltz back in here and act like she cares when she clearly didn't care enough to stay when we were younger.”
“Ella, people can change. She sounded genuinely interested in what—”
I park the car in my dad’s driveway before I turn to my sister. “This is what happens, Lizzie. She’ll get your hopes up, and when you think everything is okay again, she’ll leave.”
“But sis—”
I cut her off again, and I know I shouldn't, but she needs to understand our mother is nothing but a runner. She bolts when she realizes she needs to be responsible. It’s what she has always done, and I’ll be damned if she tries to come crawling back, only to break my sister's heart.
She doesn't get to break mine again, not after I practically raised my sister. She doesn't get to take credit for everything I’ve done to keep us afloat while she left and didn't spare a single fucking glance back.
“Lizzie, she’s not a good person. If you want to keep your heart intact, you’ll stop talking to her.”
“You might be my older sister, but you can’t tell me what to do.”
“Sis, I’m trying to protect you from her.” I grab her hand. “She’ll only leave you with empty promises and a broken heart. Trust me, I know what it feels like to want to believe she’s changed.” But she never will . I don’t add that, because I can tell my sister truly believes our mother is capable of becoming a good person.
She only thinks that because of how I’ve shielded her from our mother her entire life. For good reason, too. I can handle the broken heart from not having a mother figure my entire life, but Lizzie is softer than I am. She wants to believe people can change, that people are capable of doing and being better.
But our mother isn't one of those people.
“I don't need you to keep protecting me, Ella. I need you to live your life and stop worrying about me all the time. I’m a big girl. I can make my own decisions.”
That kind of hits me in the chest. I know she’s older now, and I know she’s capable of doing things herself, but to me, she’ll always be the sister who used to crawl into bed with me in the middle of the night. She’ll always be the kid who cried when one of her stuffed animals fell off her bed and got left out during the night.
“I know, Lizzie, but—”
My sister gets out of my car as if it’s on fire, slamming the door behind her. I flinch, feeling like I got punched in the face. I get that she’s mad at me, but she would thank me if she knew what our mother was really like. I don’t want her to find out. I don't think she could handle the heartbreak.
As I watch her go inside, I slump against my seat. All I want to do is protect her. That’s all I’ve done since our mom left the first time.
It fucking hurts hearing she wants a relationship with Lizzie now, and me, I guess. But I know better than to believe in her. It makes me mad she picks now, of all times, to come back.
It’s bad enough she’s around again, but now, my sister is mad at me.
Today has officially been the worst, and all I need when I get home is a bottle of tequila and some shitty movie to distract me from the weirdness I’m feeling.
It turns out, the only thing I have at home is wine and an annoyed roommate.
It seems like Leo and I have both had days from hell, and being mad in the same space is a recipe for disaster.
The disaster starts now, because Leo is cooking around me in the kitchen as I try to find the corkscrew, and there’s nothing that pisses me off more than someone being in the kitchen at the same time as me. I don't know why it angers me, but him being in my space is always an annoyance, and today is no different.
I sigh heavily as I search another drawer and can’t find it. I swear, we always keep it in the drawer next to where we store the alcohol, but it’s not in there.
“Do you need some help or something?” Leo asks, a pinch of attitude in his voice.
“No. Go back to huffing by the stove,” I tell him as I open another cabinet. Where the fuck is this corkscrew?
“Only you could make this day worse,” he whispers under his breath, though not very well, because I heard every word.
“How is it possible your day was bad? You went to work and came home. It’s no different than any other day for you, and Brody was even in today— Oh! That’s it then.” I stand from the hunched over position I was in.
“What?”
“You’re probably pissed off because you spent the entire day up Brody’s ass.”
His eyes narrow at me, and he looks more pissed than before. Good . His mere presence in my safe space angers me every time I come home to find he’s here.
I open another drawer, and as I see the corkscrew and try to grab it, Leo shuts it and almost breaks my fucking hands.
“What the fuck is your problem? You could have broken my fingers, you fucking psychopath!”
He cages me into the kitchen island, both of his arms on either side of me. “You. You are my fucking problem, Williams.”
“Give me a fucking break, Zimmerman. You’re the one slamming shit with a pissed off expression on your face.”
“It’s been a long day, and I wanted to come home, make a nice meal, and enjoy my night.”
I point my finger at him. “Then do that! Nobody’s fucking stopping you!” I press my finger into his chest and try to shove him away, but he doesn't budge.
“You are! You’re stopping me from having a good night!”
“I’ve barely talked to you since I got home!” I say as I push off the island. I’m sick of this. I didn't come home just to get into a yelling match with Leo. All I want is to get drunk and try to forget about the bomb my sister dropped on me this afternoon, but I can’t, because he’s here. He’s always fucking around no matter where I go, and it pisses me off.
I hate looking at his stupid face all day, and I hate seeing his annoying ass when I come home and try to unwind.
Alissa owes me big time for letting him stay here.
I open the drawer and grab the corkscrew before I stab it into the cork. If I was a better person, I wouldn't be seeing Leo’s face in the cork as I stab it, but I’m not.
Fuck, what I would give to stab Leo for real. I’m sure he’d be fine. I’m sure he’d have some hot nurse come and look after him.
Stop, Ella .
“You imagined that was me, didn't you?”
“No comment.” I smile sweetly at him as I abandon the glass and drink straight from the bottle. As I walk by him, I turn the stove off. If he wants to play these stupid fucking games, I will too.
I get into my room and place my wine bottle on my side table, but I notice I don’t hear my door shut. When I turn around, Leo is in my room.
“Why did you turn the stove off? I was using it.”
“Because you tried to cut my hands off when you shut the drawer.”
He runs a hand through his already messy hair. “God, Williams, you act so high and mighty for someone who plays games like a bloody child.”
“Coming from you,” I poke his chest again, “that’s fucking rich.”
He steps closer to me, officially invading my personal space. “I only fight with you because you piss me off unlike anyone else.”
“Then I deserve a medal. It’s way too fucking easy.”
“A medal? Oh, you want a trophy for pushing every goddamn button and getting under my skin? Is that what you want? A fucking prize?” he asks me, his face close to mine.
“Yes, actually—”
And before I can register what’s happening, his lips smash into mine.
I might hate most things about Ella, but when my lips connect with hers and she shuts her mouth, I like her.
I don't know why I’m kissing her, if I’m being honest. All I know is that today was fucking terrible, and for some reason, when she was yelling and pointing her finger at me, I was turned on.
There’s something so devilish about Ella when she’s angry. I’ve always liked playing with fire, but her fire is more explosive, more intense.
That’s what makes her such a good fuck. She’s just as explosive in the bedroom as she is with her mouth.
But she’s kissing me back, just like last time we did this.
Fuck, I’ve missed how good this feels. Not because it’s with Ella, but in general. Normally, I’m not much of a kisser, but it was the only way I could shut Ella up, other than shoving her down onto her knees and shoving my dick in her mouth.
On second thought…
I snake one of my hands to her chest and shove her back on her bed. She bounces on the mattress before I grab her by the neck and hoist her up onto her knees.
“What the fuck, Zimmerman?”
“Oh, back to surnames, are we?” I ask as I tighten my hold on her neck. “I like you much better when you’re not talking back like a little fucking brat.”
Her pupils dilate, and I know her pussy is pulsing between her legs. Ella might hate me, but she loves my mouth. She loved when I talked dirty in her ear while I thrusted into her. Well, her pussy loved it. The last and only time we fucked, it was practically strangling my cock when I told her how good she looked taking my dick.
My hand was around her throat, so she couldn't say something snippy back to me, but I know she liked it. She came all over my cock and then bolted, but nothing could ever erase that memory from my head.
“S-Shut the fuck u-up,” she stammers, my hand still wrapped around her throat.
“Not until you stop acting like a brat, or do I need to take you over my knee and teach you a lesson?”
“We’re not doing this again, Leo.” I loosen my hold on her neck before I turn her around so she’s on her stomach.
And then, I smack her arse—hard. And I swear, I hear her moan into her bed.
“You’re telling me one thing, but your pussy says another. How badly is it aching to be filled by the person you hate the most right now? Tell me the truth, Ella, or your arse is getting smacked even harder.”
She squirms underneath me, her thighs rubbing together tells me all I need to know.
“It won’t mean anything if we do, Ella. It’s just sex, just like it was last time we slipped up.”
She laughs. “Is that what we’re calling it now? A slip up?”
“Seems fitting, doesn't it?”
“Whatever.”
“Oh, so you don’t want me to take care of your needy fucking pussy? You don’t want me to fuck you how I know you liked to be fucked?”
She turns her head to look at me, her gaze tormented, as if she can’t figure out what’s worse: having sex with me or not.
At least if she has sex, she’ll get an orgasm.
“It’s me or your vibrator, darling.”
“Why do you want to fuck me, Leo? Can’t you go find someone else?”
No, apparently, I can’t . “Because you piss me off and my dick is hard. And since we both had a shit day, we could use something good, like an orgasm.”
She doesn't say a word as I stare at her from where she lies on her bed.
“Take it or fucking leave it, Williams.”
I see the moment she gives in. Her eyes narrow at me, and she turns her head back around. “If you try and kiss me again, I’ll bite your lip off. We’re fucking, and that’s it.”
“God, I liked you so much better when you couldn't talk back,” I say as I shove her head into her bed. “Now, sit there and take my dick like the bad girl you are.”
I unzip my pants, my underwear coming off with them as I toss them aside. My dick is hard and ready, practically throbbing. It hasn't felt anything but my fist the past few months.
“Condom, Leo. I don't want you anywhere near me without one on.”
“I’m not a fucking idiot, Ella.”
“I didn't say you were—”
“On second thought, maybe your mouth should be full,” I say as I grab her legs and drag her to the edge of the bed. She sits up, and her face is perfectly in line with my cock. “Suck.”
“I would rather die—”
I grab her chin and lift it up. “Suck my fucking cock, darling.”
“Are you sure you want me to? I could bite it off.” My dick jerks in front of her. “Seriously?”
“Ella, you better start listening—” Before I can finish my sentence, her mouth is around my dick, and she starts to suck.
Holy fuck .
Her mouth is warm, wet, and takes my cock so well. What she can’t fit in her mouth, she uses her hand to jerk as she sucks, and I swear, I could come right down her throat. It has been way too long since I’ve had someone else do this for me, and it feels way too damn good, even if it is Ella making me feel like this.
She might be the biggest pain in my fucking backside, but she sucks cock like a fucking champ. Good to know her mouth is useful for something other than giving me attitude.
She releases my dick with a pop and then looks up at me with that signature Ella pissed off face.
“Are you going to fuck me or what? I don’t have all night.”
I grab the condom I got from her drawer and bring it up to my mouth, ripping the foil with my teeth as I keep my eyes on her.
Then, I shove her back on her bed like I did before.
“Take your clothes off.”
“No.”
I kind of like this game we play. The last time we fucked, she did the same thing—fought me at every turn—and I can’t remember a time my dick was as hard as it was then and now.
It seems arguing with Ella Williams gets my cock hard.
“Take your clothes off, Ella. Now.”
She keeps her eyes on mine as she drags her pants down her body as slow as she possibly can. Can’t she ever make this easy?
I roll the condom on, and as she gets her pants off, I flip her over. She’s lying on her stomach, her perky arse in the air as her legs hang off the side of her bed.
Before she can talk back to me again, I thrust into her.
And my God, it feels like coming home after a long day away.
Her pussy is tight, wet, and the best thing I’ve felt after months of fisting my cock to make myself come.
I can’t help the moan that slips from my mouth.
“Are you going to just sit there, or are you going to fuck me?” she asks as she pushes her ass into me, my dick going even deeper.
Then, I start moving, her ass bouncing against me as I slam into her over and over again.
She’s holding back, I can fucking tell, and it’s pissing me off.
“Scream, Ella. You know you want to.”
“I would rather die,” she tells me, her face twisted in pleasure.
Is death really better in her eyes than getting fucked how I know she wants to be? “Fine. We’re doing this the hard way then.”
“What does—”
She doesn't have time to finish her thought before I spank her again. Hard . And before she has time to throw another quip back at me, I flip her over, and my hand finds her neck.
“If you want to hold back your noises from me, then I’ll make it easier for you.”
Her eyes bulge out of her head, her pussy tightening as I look her in the eye while I fuck her. And what a sight it is, seeing her writhe underneath me.
Ella likes being choked more than anyone else I’ve been with, but actually feeling her get more aroused with my hand around her neck is spinning me out of control.
As I continue thrusting into her tight pussy, I see her hand slide down to her clit as she starts to play with herself.
“That’s it, darling. Help me get you off. Help me make you come while I choke you until you can’t breathe.”
I feel her throat move as she takes small breaths, obviously wanting to say something, but with all the back talk she gave me, she doesn't deserve it.
I grab her legs and hoist them onto my shoulders before I throw her hand off her clit and take control. She doesn't deserve to get herself off. That’s my fucking job.
I’m in control here, not her. And God, it feels good finally having her submit to me after all the times she stood her ground. Don’t get me wrong, I love making her face red and arguing with her. It feels good knowing I get under her skin as much as she does mine.
But seeing her like this? Overwhelmed with pleasure because of me? Nothing will ever beat that. Nothing .
“Let go, Ella. Stop fighting it and fucking come on my cock,” I tell her, and as her eyes roll to the back of her head, I feel her pussy spasm around me as she coats my dick.
A few seconds later, I follow her, unable to hold back my release any longer. It feels so fucking good, and it’s so much stronger than it has been in months.
Fuck my dry spell. This is what pleasure feels like, and fuck, I’ve missed it.
I roll off her, and we lay beside one another in stunned silence for way too long. When I finally turn to talk to her, I notice she’s fast asleep.
I’m jolted back to the last time we did this in college—the same thing happened. I wonder if she’s always like this after sex, or if it only happens when she has sex with me.
After I get my bearings, I grab a washcloth and clean her up. I don't bother showering because I’m too fucking exhausted from the emotional whiplash of today. I’ve gone from pissed off to feeling like I’m on top of the world.
All because of her.
And just like last time, I fall asleep with her in bed next to me.
Maybe this time, she won’t be gone when I wake up, but knowing Ella and how our relationship works, when we wake up tomorrow, it’ll be back to normal.
Just how it’s supposed to be.