CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Katarina
I needed to get laid. Soon.
I had failed when we went to the bar last weekend but I needed to try again and quickly.
Too many times I’d been distracted by the pull of Jack’s shoulders when he hauled hay. The corded muscles running along his forearm as he gripped the shovel tight. The way the sweat had his shirt clinging to him so obscenely it had me panting.
It was official. I was a horrible human being. I was lusting after the man who killed my mother. Which is why I needed to get laid and bad.
I couldn’t talk to anyone about it. I couldn’t even admit it to myself properly. And don’t get me started on the number of times the man had caught me staring at him. It was getting embarrassing.
My cheeks flushed with shame. “What would Mama think of you fantasizing about her killer like that? Or Daddy?” I scolded myself as I brushed my hair out of its ponytail.
Yesterday, I’d opened up the dating app I was half-assing. I needed to full-ass it. I’d matched with a couple of guys and was talking to one of them who seemed kinda nice, Jeremy.
We were going out tonight. It was pretty soon, less than a day of talking, but I needed to move quickly. Which is why I’d invited him for a late drink at the bar. At least that way if he was a dud then we wouldn’t have the whole evening to kill.
I put on my denim dress that had buttons all the way down the middle, and I curled the ends of my hair. I went for the natural look with my makeup and decided my cowgirl boots would be good enough, once I brushed off some of the mud and shit.
The fact that I was driving to the bar said it all. I wasn’t planning on drinking more than one and although I’d made some effort with my appearance, I hadn’t pulled out all the stops and there wasn’t a single flutter of excited butterflies in my belly.
Parking up outside the bar, I checked my teeth in the rearview mirror and sighed. “You’ll hit it off and those butterflies will come,” I tried to tell myself as I fluffed my hair one more time before going inside.
It was another busy Friday night at the bar, packed with locals and Leo was in the corner again entertaining the buckle bunnies. I waved at him when I entered and his eyes turned hopeful as he mouthed save me . I shook my head laughing. He was a big boy, and he knew what he was doing.
I took a seat at the bar, glancing around for Jeremy but he wasn’t here yet. I leaned across the bar, looking for Max, eager for another free drink after the shenanigans from last week. I could see a dark head bobbing around beneath the bar.
“Hey, loser,” I said, ruffling the hair of the bobbing head. “What’s it take to get service around here?” Damn, what conditioner is he using, so soft.
My breath snagged in my throat when the head turned into a full body. The body I’d not been able to stop drooling over all week. My cheeks flamed when I realized I’d been tousling Jack’s soft, soft hair.
“Oh uh…” I trailed off, not knowing what to say. “You’re not Max.”
He grinned at me. “I’m not, although that felt nice, feel free to do it again.” My heart pounded and he visibly cringed. “I’m sorry, that was out of line.”
We just stared at each other, not saying anything and the awkward tension mounted with each moment. He scrubbed the back of his neck, his sleeve riding up his bicep and my eyes glued to the muscle flexing there.
“Katrina?”
I turned towards the voice, broken out of my stupor and found a vaguely familiar-looking man standing there. I stared at him for a moment before I remembered I was here to meet him.
“It’s Katarina. Hi Jeremy,” I said, holding out a hand to shake as he went in for a cheek kiss. “Oh uh…” Is that all you’re capable of saying tonight?
“Pleased to meet you, Katarina,” he said, his voice soft.
“Call me Kat,” I said, assessing him. I wouldn’t say I’d been catfished, but Jeremy was not five ten. I’m five ten and he wasn’t quite coming up to my shoulder. His blonde hair was cropped short and he was wearing a smart business suit. He gave me a smile which had a much creepier feel to it than it had in his pictures.
“What would you like to drink, Kat?” he said. “My treat.”
I’m all for paying my way, I don’t expect men to pay for anything. But the way he said my treat was patronizing as hell. “Thanks Jer, can I get a gin and tonic?”
“It’s Jeremy,” he replied with that icky smile.
“Sorry Jeremy.”
“No problem, you grab us a table and I’ll bring the drinks over.”
I could feel Jack’s eyes on me and refused to meet them as I hopped down from the barstool and went searching for a table a little quieter and out of the way. I managed to snag one and I wiped it down, not wanting Jeremy to get his nice suit all wet from whatever the hell was on the table.
When Jeremy came over he sat right next to me instead of on the opposite chair which felt a little awkward. I turned in my seat, taking a sip from my drink and we were practically nose to nose. He immediately slurped from his beer and placed a hand on my knee.
“So what’s a pretty little thing like you doing still single, Kitty?” He was trying to be charming but my vagina began sewing itself shut.
“It’s Kat. Well I look after the ranch with my four sisters so there hasn’t been too much time for dating, I guess. What about you?” I asked, trying to switch the conversation back to him and pushing his hand off my knee.
“It’s been hard trying to meet someone ever since the wife left me. ”
He definitely hadn’t put that he was married before on his profile. Jeremy was sinking further and further down in my estimation. “Oh, you’ve been married?”
“Still am. She’ll probably try and take everything in the divorce so I’m waiting until I meet someone worth taking that leap for.” He nodded and ran his eyes over me in a way that suggested he was probably picturing me naked.
I scooted my chair back, putting some more space between us and took a big gulp of my gin, trying to tell myself to stop being so judgy.
“Any kids?” I asked, hoping there wasn’t another surprise waiting for me.
“Christ, no,” he snorted. “You?”
“Not yet,” I said, trying to give off the vibe that I wouldn’t be opposed to it. “So what do you do for a living?” I took another big gulp of my gin, I’d nearly drank it all and needed to slow down.
“I’m a lawyer.” He banged down his beer bottle on the table, suds flying but he didn’t bat an eyelid.
“What kind of law?” I asked, downing the rest of my gin, needing something to distract myself from how shit a conversationalist Jeremy was. How did he even get a wife to not divorce in the first place?
“Criminal mostly. It’s getting busy now, you’re lucky I managed to fit this drink in.” He smirked like he was joking but I knew he wasn’t. Oh Jer…
“How long have you been practicing law?” Seriously, give me something.
He shrugged. “Ten years now. I’ll get us a couple more drinks, you really nailed that one.”
I looked at the gin glass in my hand that was empty and my vision swam a little. Damn I had drunk it so fast it had gone to my head a bit .
“No, it’s fine.”
“Nonsense, one more can’t hurt, can it?” He smiled again and then he was gone. I shouted after him that I only wanted a lemonade but I don’t think he heard me. My ears started ringing and I kept having to blink to clear my vision. I watched the people on the dance floor who started to blur and the music pitch seemed to deepen.
A loud noise and a crash drew my attention back towards the bar. There were fewer people now that it was getting later, and I could see Jack and Jeremy facing off. Oh shit.
I stood up but the room started spinning and I closed my eyes, clasping my forehead as a splitting headache began. How was I so drunk? I only had one. I had been planning to drive but there was no way I could now.
“Where’s Kat?” I heard Jack demand. “And where the fuck is Max!”
I stumbled towards the bar but my vision wasn’t clearing and neither was the blinding headache. A shadow appeared in front of me and then an arm came around my back.
“Kat? Are you okay?”
I looked up into Jack’s concerned blue gaze. “Jack?” I slurred.
“Come on, I’m getting you out of here,” he said, his voice angry and he started steering me towards the door.
“No, where’s Leo?” I demanded.
“He left already. Everyone’s either gone home or drunk. It’s just me.”
I snorted. “You’re the sober one for once.”
His arm stiffened around me at my words. The warmth from his body flowed through me, thawing my fuzzy head.
“I’m sorry I didn’t—”
“It’s fine,” he gritted out .
I didn’t know what was wrong with me but I suddenly did not feel very good at all. “I wanna go home,” I whimpered. The cool evening air kissed my skin as he took me outside.
“I know, sweetheart. I’m sorry I can’t get you there quicker.”
“What do you mean?”
“I can’t drive you. I’m not allowed to drive.”
“Oh,” was all my fuzzy brain could muster. The bright lights from the street all bled into one and I groaned. “I wanna get home, Jack. I don’t feel good at all. What’s wrong with me?” His arm around me tightened and pulled me closer into the wall of his chest as we stumbled down the street together.
“I know you don’t. Your damn date’s a fucking asshole!” he growled. “I caught him putting something in your drink. I’m only sorry I didn’t see him do it the first time.”
“Oh my God,” I cried, clinging tightly to Jack’s arm.
“I wanted to beat the crap outta him but I can’t risk it.”
I looked up at him, his mouth pinched tight, his expression unreadable. “Because you’ll go back to prison?” I whispered.
He nodded sharply. He didn’t say anything more after that and I didn’t ask. I didn’t know how far we’d walked but I was tired, absolutely exhausted and I started stumbling. My legs wouldn’t work and my vision was blurry. The fourth time I stumbled, he swore to himself and then he was hefting me into his arms.
“What are you doing?” I mumbled, pushing against his chest but my hands were just pressing against a block of granite, it was futile.
“You can’t walk, Kat. We’re nearly home, then you can get into bed. After you vomit because that’s probably gonna happen.”
I groaned, scrubbing a hand down my face before resting my head against his shoulder, my arms circling his neck. The slightly curled ends of his hair were tickling my fingers and I longed to curl my fist in the soft strands. His scent invaded my nostrils in a tantalizing way and I groaned.
“You gonna hurl?” he asked, pausing his steps.
“Not right now. God, why do you always find me when I’m hurling?” I grumbled and a deep laugh shook his chest, bouncing my head.
I think I dozed off at some point and woke when the ranch came into view. “Please don’t tell my sisters,” I whispered.
He grunted. “Sorry sweetheart, I gotta tell someone so they can look after you.”
“No, please, I don’t want them to worry about me. Just put me in my room and then go.”
He shifted me in his arms. I’m not a small woman, I can’t have been light but he was easily carrying me. “I can’t. What if you choke on your vomit in the night? Someone needs to watch over you until morning.”
I’m going to blame it on my altered state, that can only be the reason why I suggested what I did. “Put me in the cabin then, you can stay with me. Please, I don’t want to worry the girls, they’ve had so much to worry about recently. I won’t be one more thing.”
We got closer to the house, the ground lit up from the lights on the porch and I saw the look of indecision flash across his far too handsome features.
“Please Jack? I’m sorry I’m inconveniencing you but please help me out?”
He swore again, he did that a lot. “I told you I’d do anything you asked,” he murmured, looking down at me and something dark passed behind his eyes. Neither of us said anything, we just stared at each other as he took me past the house and towards the cabin.