Chapter 2
I was nervous when my father asked us all to meet at my mother’s house. It had been a while since we all had a family dinner together. He even wanted my two best friends there. They came right before we sat down to eat because they were both at work.
Lily and Sophie had been my best friends since forever. They had the whitest names, but they were black as they came. I teased them about their names all the time.
“So, Coye, how was Colombia?” my father asked as the food was passed around the table.
Coye told us about his latest trip, and the way my brother looked, I knew there was more to the story that he didn’t want to share with us.
Every few seconds, Coye would look in my direction, and my stomach would tighten.
There was no denying how fine Coye was. His skin reminded me of milk chocolate, and he had a full beard that looked like he had some type of oil in it.
He was covered in tattoos, even on his hands.
He always wore at least two gold chains, a gold bracelet, and an expensive ass watch.
Every time I saw him, he had on a different watch.
Some big ass diamond and gold earrings were in his ears.
And damn did he smell good when he hugged me.
I low-key wished he hadn’t given me that church hug, because it felt good to be in his arms.
His dark eyes made me nervous. He couldn’t have been looking at me the way I thought he was, because he was my brother’s best friend. We’d known each other for years.
At times, my brother would treat me like I was annoying, but Coye never acted like that.
They were both four years older than me, and I wanted to be around them all the time because I looked up to my big brother.
At some point over the years, my brother and I grew apart, but I loved him with all my heart.
I stood ten toes down behind my brother, and I knew he would do the same for me if needed.
My brother had a wife and kids now, so I understood it.
“Auntie River, did you bring any cookies?” my nephew, Ro, asked.
“I’m not telling you,” I teased. “You have to eat all of your dinner first.”
I was the proud owner of Amelia’s Cookies, a shop that was originally owned by my grandmother, Amelia, but when she died, she left it to me.
For four years, I lived and breathed the cookie shop.
I barely went out with my friends because I was always baking cookies or trying to find new recipes.
Once a month, we had a new cookie flavor.
“I’m eating all mine, Auntie.” Brielle showed me her plate.
The two of them were my babies.
“As you should. I might have something for you later.” I winked at her, and she giggled.
We went around the table, updating each other about what had been going on in our lives.
“River, what happened to Mickey?” my mother asked.
I quickly glanced at Coye, then down at my plate. He had this strange look in his eyes, and I wasn’t sure what that was about. I noticed his jaw clench, but he unclenched it quickly.
“Mickey and I didn’t work out. You don’t remember me telling you that?” I wasn’t in the mood to talk about Mickey or anyone else from my past.
A little too often, my mother would ask me when I was going to give her grandkids or get married, and I brushed her off every time.
“Oh yeah. I liked him,” she added.
“That’s great. He wasn’t going to work out. Ro, how’s school been?” I had to take the attention off me.
Roman told us everything that went on in his class.
I felt someone looking at me, and when I looked up, Coye had his eyes on me. My stomach flipped, and heat rushed through my body when he licked his lips.
What the hell is happening?
I scooped some mashed potatoes onto my fork and avoided eye contact.
As the conversations continued, I was deep in thought about a new recipe I wanted to try.
I wanted to call one of the girls to see how things were going, but I took the day off for a reason, and I needed to remind myself of that.
It seemed like no matter what, I was thinking about the cookie shop.
Maybe that was why some of my relationships didn’t work.
My mother bringing up Mickey made me think of the last time I saw him.
He came by the cookie shop just after I’d closed.
He helped me clean up, then fucked me on one of the small tables.
I thought we were good, but later that night, he sent me a message telling me that he couldn’t be with me anymore.
I wasn’t even sad about it, but I was sad about him taking his good dick with him.
That was months ago, and I hadn’t had sex since.
“There’s a reason why I asked you all to come.” My father’s voice broke me out of my thoughts.
He placed his fork onto his plate, wiped his mouth, then lifted his head. His eyes traveled to each of us at the table, and my heart started beating fast as hell. I knew my father, and whatever he was about to tell us wasn’t going to be good. I felt it in my gut.
Everyone got quiet and gave him our undivided attention.
I watched his chest inflate as he inhaled, then he blew the breath out. My eyes watered without him saying a word. I felt Sophie rub my back, while Lily rubbed my leg under the table. My left leg bounced hard.
“This isn’t easy to say, but it’s important that I tell you all what’s been going on.”
Since my mother sat next to him, she grabbed his hand and squeezed it.
“I have liver cancer.”
Multiple gasps filled the quietness.
“What? What do you mean? Can . . .” I couldn’t finish saying the word while tears streamed down my face. There was a roaring sound in my ears, and I couldn’t hear what anyone else said.
It felt like everything I ate was about to come back up. The walls felt like they were closing in on me as my mother audibly cried. The kids looked concerned, but they both were quiet. Brielle had climbed into her father’s lap. Ro’s eyes bounced around the table.
I couldn’t look at anyone else, because I would break down even more.
“I found out a couple of weeks ago and had been trying to find a way to tell you all.”
“Weeks?” I screeched.
I pushed my chair back and ran out of the dining room. I heard chairs moving before I heard Coye say something, but I couldn’t make out what he said.
I pulled at my shirt because I couldn’t breathe. My chest was tight as tears rushed down my face faster than I could catch them. I pushed open the front door and ran out onto the porch. I didn’t care that it was cool outside, and I didn’t have on a coat. I needed the air because I was suffocating.
I felt lightheaded, so I sat down on the step. I tried to swallow the lump in my throat, but instead, a loud sob escaped me.
My father was my hero. My first protector.
The man who taught me how to ride a bike and drive a car.
I couldn’t imagine him having cancer. This couldn’t be real life right now.
I couldn’t imagine my father not being healthy and happy.
I didn’t bother drying the tears on my face because they kept coming.
“Oh God.” I cried. I wanted to scream, but I didn’t need my mother’s neighbors coming outside.
I wasn’t sure how much time had passed when I heard the door open.
“I don’t want to talk,” I said to whoever it was.
“And we don’t have to. I just don’t want you out here alone.”
I wrapped my arms around my knees and dropped my head.
Coye’s deep voice made me close my eyes and cry even more. I couldn’t look up, but I smelt him as he sat down next to me.
Coye always had this rich nigga smell about him. I couldn’t explain it because I didn’t know what it was, but he always smelled good. I knew whatever cologne he wore was probably just as expensive as the jewelry he wore.
I jumped when I felt his arm wrap around me. The damn broke even more.
We stayed outside for a while with him holding me. I was surprised nobody came out, but I guess they were giving me some space. I was grateful to Coye for comforting me.
When I finally got myself together, I went into the house and went to my old childhood room, where I cried myself to sleep. I couldn’t talk to anyone if I tried without crying.
In the morning, we could talk about the next steps. My father had to beat this shit.