Epilogue
March 10th
I sat in the office working on the new laptop Logan had given me for my birthday. When I’d opened the gift, he said he hoped I would use it for writing should the urge strike. I’d gotten the itch, more than he knew, and had been working on something in my free time ever since.
As I waited for the pages I was printing to finish, I absently played with the opal bracelet around my wrist while I watched the girls through the window.
Grace and Sage were down for Spring Break and out in the pool playing with Sadie and Riley. The younger girls kept begging until they’d agreed to take them out. I’d listened to their fun while I worked on my project for the last hour. They were taking turns throwing a ball in the pool for our Golden Retriever puppy.
“Good boy, Theo!” Sadie cheered him on as he jumped in again.
A few moments later, I grinned, watching Riley and Sadie sneak up on Grace, pushing her into the water before running away together in a fit of giggles.
It was wonderful having all the girls at home.
Last year Grace gave up her TA position despite my trying to talk her out of it and stayed in Florida. She’d taken it upon herself to be my caretaker while I healed.
With the help of a therapist, we also started to do some healing together from the past only the two of us had shared when she was a child.
I’d watched my daughter laugh more and grow happier over those weeks; seeing me happy with Logan seemed to have flipped a final switch in her. Despite the focus on Riley’s recovery and my own, I felt like we all bonded deeply before Grace had to leave for the fall semester.
On top of the solo work I was doing with my therapist, Grace and I continued our weekly sessions by telehealth once she was back in Philly and I’d begun to feel like I was coming to the end of worrying for her. I’d also had the realization that perhaps Grace’s seemingly lighter spirit was because she was coming to the end of worrying for me as well.
At the end of last summer, Logan asked me to stay in Florida and I'd agreed without hesitation. We’d had too many examples of life being too short and too precious to not spend as much of it with each other as possible.
Sadie had been excited about the move, especially when we’d learned her new school here had a math club .
The next few months had been a whirlwind of changes.
I looked at my glass bird sitting by the window, then at the frame beside it, my favorite photo from a perfect day in mid-November.
It was a frozen moment in time of the girls standing with us in deep blue dresses. Logan looking like he’d just stepped off a runway in his navy suit and dark purple tie to match the tiny flowers mixed in with the white roses the girls and I held. Logan had convinced me to wear white, my dress a beautiful lace.
I loved the candid moment our wedding photographer had caught of Logan dipping me back in his arms to kiss me with Grace grinning at us happily. Sadie and Riley were making faces at each other to express their little girl disgust of kissing, the two of them already thick as thieves.
Riley had helped her dad propose during one of her physical therapy sessions in September by pretending to fall from her walker so he could end up on one knee to catch her. He had stayed there, ring in hand when I rushed to them. They both thought they were so clever, grinning as my worry was replaced with shock.
Riley had insisted she would be walking on her own by the wedding, and she had. Not the whole day, but she worked hard so she could stand and hold a hand with each of her new sisters as we combined our families into one.
My heart felt so full of beautiful new memories.
Hearing Grace murmur to Logan, “Thank you for loving my mother so much,” when she hugged him after the ceremony .
Seeing the joy on Logan’s face the day Sadie asked him shyly if she could call him Daddy.
Feeling so many emotions when Riley threw her arms around me on Christmas after we surprised the girls with the puppy. She’d held on to me for so long. Her hugs were now one of my favorite things.
I smiled while I watched the girls again. Riley was sitting on the side of the pool, squealing as Grace splashed her before pulling her into the water to dance together. Sadie was patting Theo on the head while she snuck him one of the treats she had hidden in a potted plant she thought I didn’t know about.
When the printer stopped, I grabbed the last pages, added them to the stack on the desk, and clipped them all together. I stared down at it, feeling a deep sense of tranquility.
I heard the elevator door and then Logan’s footsteps coming down the hallway.
We had taken the week off to enjoy the break with the girls, but he’d needed to sneak off to do a bit of bookkeeping that morning.
I turned the chair to the doorway and watched my husband come into view. I glanced between him and my pages, feeling unsure. I wasn’t positive if it was the right day.
Logan spotted me in the office as he set the big take-out bag he was carrying on the kitchen bar and headed my way. His step faltered when he saw the slight frown on my face. “What’s wrong, sweetheart? ”
He’d left before I woke so I hadn’t gotten a chance to gauge his mood. He seemed fine, but…
“I’m… just wondering how you are feeling today.”
Logan gave me a faint smile. “I figured you would remember the date.” He stopped in front of me with a look of understanding. “I know how you saw me last year, at the bar that night, Madison. I want you to know that you’ll never see me like that again. I was in a dark place, with dark memories, and I don’t want or need to go to that place again.”
He reached out his hand and I put mine in his.
“I have forgiven myself, whether I needed to or not. I have my child again and two more wonderful daughters. I have the most amazing wife in the world. I’ll always miss Natalie, but I don’t have to continue grieving her. I think she would be happy that we found each other. I’m done drowning myself in guilt and whiskey, alright?”
I sighed with relief as I stood, and we wrapped our arms around each other.
“I love you, Crash.”
I rolled my eyes and butted my forehead against his chest, embracing the name he hadn’t given up, then pressed my lips to his heart. “I love you, too.”
Logan glanced out the window when he heard the girls.
“Sadie wants to go with us to Riley’s physical therapy session today; they asked if we could visit Toby at the hospital afterward.” He winked at me. “I’ll give him your regards. ”
“I also promised Grace we’d go surfing one more time before she has to leave to head back to Philly tomorrow, so busy day ahead.” He turned to the doorway. “Are you hungry? I brought my girls fresh scones.”
I bit my lip and grabbed Logan’s hand to stop him. “I have something for you.” I picked up the pages and held them close to my chest for a few moments before extending my hands to him.
Logan took them from me, pleasure in his eyes as he read the title. “Is this what you’ve been working on? I get to read it?”
I nodded. I felt both shy and excited as he looked down at the cover page again. “It’s only the first draft. It still needs a ton of work,” I told him.
He raised a questioning brow, and I knew he had read the author’s name.
I shrugged awkwardly. “I’m playing around with a pen name. Irene is the goddess of peace.” I scrunched my nose as he grinned at what had become our inside joke. “And Henry… I mean come on, that just goes without saying,” I teased.
Logan stared at the wall over my shoulder, slightly shook his head, and muttered, “Damn you, Cavill,” under his breath.
When I snorted, he grinned.
“I’ll admit, it has a nice ring to it.” He sat my manuscript on the desk and pulled me back into his arms. “I might be a little jealous though.”
I looked out the window. The girls were screeching with pleasure as Theo shook pool water off, raining it all over them .
They should be occupied for quite a while…
I pulled my husband’s mouth to mine.
When I ended the long, deep kiss, Logan was staring at me with the blue fire I’d been aiming for.
I sauntered to the doorway, giving him a saucy glance over my shoulder.
“Why don’t you follow me and I’ll show you… several… reasons Superman is the one who should be jealous of you?”
A few steps into the living room, I shrieked with laughter when Logan scooped me up in his arms.
“You’re my kryptonite, woman.” His long strides carried us quickly toward our bedroom while his eyes roamed over me. “Mmmm, what I wouldn’t give for X-ray vision.”
I laughed again then rested my hands around Logan’s neck and relaxed my head on his arm to look out at the beautiful sky through the windows.
Cradled in the arms of the man who loved me, I put my arms out as I watched the huge clouds pass by.
It felt like I was flying.
The End.