Chapter 1 #3
Elizabeth’s eyes flashed with anger. “I would not have expected it of him given his openness and amiability,” she seethed. “He has used my sister very ill. May I tell her of his engagement to see if it will ease her heartbreak?”
“I am not certain, Miss Bennet,” he replied slowly.
“I have broken a confidence to tell you this much, but perhaps it would be best if she knew. It may help your sister to know he is promised elsewhere and cannot easily break that attachment. However, Bingley has broken faith with more than just your sister, so mayhap I should not feel so badly to have broken a promise to him.”
She eyed him cautiously. “Whatever do you mean, sir?”
A pained expression crossed his face. “I have not laid eyes on Bingley since I left Netherfield.
When I returned to my room after the ball, my valet informed me of a conversation he overheard between two maids.
Bingley and his sister intended to compromise me that night.
After confronting my former friend about their treacherous intentions, I returned to my room, only to find Miss Bingley attempting to barge in and berating my valet for obstructing her.
Bingley trailed behind, insisting I marry her, a proposition I unequivocally rejected.
I told both of them I would cut her if she ever approached me again, and I departed Netherfield that very night.
My valet ensured the staff knew I did not spend the night there before he departed that morning with my belongings.
“The way Miss Bingley treats the household staff earns her no loyalty, so they readily corroborated my account of the incident. Since then, Bingley has made a few attempts to contact me, and his sister has also tried reaching out to my sister. These have been unsuccessful, as my servants have been instructed to deny them entry. Eventually, Bingley sent a letter attempting to explain himself, which I did read, though I chose not to respond.”
Elizabeth looked at him aghast. “But I believed him to be your friend!”
“I did as well, Miss Elizabeth,” Darcy agreed sadly.
“However, I have realised he is more avaricious than I had realised. He and his sister planned to trap me into marriage to hide the fact that her dowry was nearly gone. He hoped I would overlook this and accept her without her dowry due to our friendship, even though I have told him for years I would never marry her for any reason.”
“How could her dowry be gone?” Elizabeth cried. “She spoke frequently of her dowry of twenty thousand pounds.”
“She constantly overspends her allowance, and I have heard whispers that Bingley has begun gambling frequently. I do not know when that began, as I have made a habit of avoiding places where men are drawn into such vices and tend to avoid those who gamble heavily. I was unaware that Bingley joined in with that sort of vice, although, in hindsight, there were a few indications,” Darcy explained.
“Then I am glad Jane will not marry him!” she said heatedly before becoming downcast. “I have recently met someone who appeared to be everything good but whose appearance of goodness hides a black heart. I am very sorry to have misjudged you, especially as it appears I have been completely wrong in several instances. I have been accused of putting too much faith into appearances and first impressions.” Elizabeth paused and drew in a breath as she took a moment to think.
Since encountering Mr Darcy at Rosings, she felt she understood him, at least a little, and the two had several positive conversations during his visits at the parsonage.
In fact, Elizabeth considered him a friend now, but despite Charlotte’s hints, she found it difficult to believe Mr Darcy was interested in her, and she was certain the dichotomy between their circumstances would prevent him from ever furthering their acquaintance beyond friendship.
If she were honest with herself, she knew it would be very easy for her to fall in love with the reserved man from Derbyshire if he only gave her a little encouragement.
“Mr Darcy, I no longer need until tomorrow; I have decided. I would like to accept your offer of courtship. I will ask my aunt and uncle to let me stay with them in London for a few weeks, though I will also have to ask my father for permission. I do not think he will protest too much as he only cares for my happiness.”
Darcy drew in a quick breath at her statement, and a pleased grin threatened to spread across his face.
Attempting to hold back his feelings, he reached out to touch her hand briefly before speaking: “Since you are concerned about your letters being read at the parsonage, if you would give me your notes tomorrow morning, I will see them posted for you,” he offered.
“I promise not to read your letters, and you could arrange to remain in London before you leave. If you like, you can have them send their replies to me so we do not risk exposure at the parsonage.”
“I will give you notes to send to my father, sister, and uncle and request they not mention anything directly in their response,” Elizabeth said.
“Just as you prefer your aunt not to find out yet, I prefer my mother not to know until things are more settled. Mama was terribly upset when I refused Mr Collins’s offer last autumn and was equally upset when Mr Bingley and his company departed Netherfield without a word.
She would be tempted to throw me off entirely if nothing were to result from our courtship.
In her mind, my refusing the heir of Longbourn was a terrible offence, and if I did not ‘secure’ you, who is worth infinitely more, she would never let me hear the end of it.
My mother values wealth more than substance, but I assure you, that is not the case for me.
” She blushed brightly as she spoke these words.
“Mr Collins proposed to you?” Darcy asked incredulously.
“Is it so surprising that a man would propose to me?” Elizabeth responded, her brow arched in challenge.
He took her hand, absently caressing her palm with his thumb.
“It would not have been a good marriage, Elizabeth. I cannot imagine you encouraged him, nor can I imagine you ever marrying such a man. I am sorry to say my aunt surrounds herself with people who grovel to her every demand, and you could not have been happy married to such a person as that. Nor could I imagine you complying with her every demand and whim, which would have made your existence here difficult, to say the least,” he replied thoughtfully, but then his lips curved into a slight grin.
“I believe marriage to Mr Collins and being under the thumb of my aunt would have made you either commit murder or end up bound for Bedlam.”
She laughed, amazed to discover Mr Darcy was capable of teasing and equally surprised at his ignoring propriety by holding her hand.
His thumb caressing her palm caused shivers to run up her spine, and she had to consciously remind herself not to lean further into him.
His use of her Christian name so casually had a similar effect.
“I believe you are correct, sir. I refused his proposal multiple times before he would believe me, and afterwards, he still applied to my father to overrule me. Thankfully, Papa supported my refusal, although Mama still bemoans the loss. She threatens not to support me when she is ‘thrown into the hedgerows’ upon my father’s passing. ”
“Is your father in ill health?” Darcy asked, suddenly worried for her.
“Not at all, Mr Darcy; he is in excellent health. Mama does not understand the entail and believes it is unfair and perhaps even unlawful, and is convinced that Mr Collins will toss us all out immediately upon inheriting,” Elizabeth explained.
“She viewed my marriage to the heir as her salvation. Because I refused him, she is even more convinced he will toss us out as retribution for his injured pride. The man simply could not imagine anyone turning down such an eligible prospect as he.”
“Did she not consider how miserable you would have been in such a situation?” he asked again.
“That was of little importance in her mind, sir. I hate to speak ill of anyone, least of all my mother, but she is of mean understanding and thinks of little beyond her comfort. I am also her least favourite child and the least understood, so it seemed fitting to her to toss me to the wolves, so to speak, to procure her eventual comfort,” Elizabeth replied.
There was a mixture of her typical archness and sadness in her tone.
“My happiness would have meant little if she could always remain at Longbourn. She does not realise that had she forced me into a marriage with such a man, I would have likely tossed her into the hedgerows myself upon my father’s passing. ”
Darcy was quiet for several moments as he considered all she said. Finally, he spoke, caution tingeing his words. “I would like to ask you a question, but I am uncertain how to word it as I do not wish to offend you.”
“How did I end up so very different from my mother?” she asked with a raised eyebrow. His eyes widened in surprise, and he nodded sheepishly. She laughed at his expression.
“It is a simple enough explanation,” she explained.
“Papa educated me as he would a son. I have read most books in his library, and I nearly manage Longbourn for him. I speak with the tenants and the steward and handle most of the issues; I only occasionally have to ask Papa’s advice or permission.
He is, quite frankly, rather indolent and prefers to spend his time reading in his book room.
I have also spent considerable time with my aunt and uncle in London.
They exposed me to a broader culture than we have in Meryton and allowed me to see and experience a different type of home life.
Unlike my parents, who often struggle to find common ground, they genuinely like each other and share a deep and profound love.
They are the example I seek to emulate in my future marriage.
Sadly, I am uncertain if my parents even like each other most of the time, and their love for each other seems to have dwindled over the years if it ever existed. ”
“It is interesting how you speak both of liking and loving each other,” Darcy said. “Can you explain what you mean by that?”
“We can love people without necessarily liking them,” she explained.
“I love my sister Lydia because of our familial bond and desire the best for her. However, I must admit that I often find it challenging to genuinely like her. Our interests and values are very dissimilar, making it difficult to connect on a deeper level. Lydia’s silly and undisciplined nature worries me, and I fear it could have detrimental consequences for herself and our family if left unchecked. ”
Darcy nodded. “That makes sense,” he replied thoughtfully.