Chapter 14
Chapter
Fourteen
R am paused as he entered his little cottage style home, setting down his bag and letting out a deep breath. Tomorrow night was the night he was going to see his mom again, and he knew he’d have trouble sleeping. The anxiety of the night before always got to him. He saw her every year but the distance hurt so much more than he could explain, he’d always been a momma’s boy and to no longer be able to see her when he wanted was a continual blow to his already battered heart. He raked a hand through his hair as he checked his phone, he needed to talk to Bram. He’d never told his brother he still saw their mother and thinking back on it he kind of felt like a dick about it, and could only hope his brother would understand. He’d made a mistake, one that he knew would hurt his brother, and that made him want to smack himself. He hopped in the shower before he dressed and headed to the main house.
“Ram?” Bram met him at the door sensing something was off. He could always tell when his brother was troubled. It was like a deep seated tingling in his gut that would grab his attention.
“I need to talk to you for a minute.” Was all Ram had to say before Bram led him to his woodshed about a hundred yards from the house.
“What’s up?” Bram asked, leaning against one of the work benches and crossing his arms over his chest. He could tell by Ram’s expression he wasn’t going to like what his brother had to say.
“Are you doing anything tomorrow night?” Ram asked, softly. He really just wanted to blurt it out but apparently his mouth had another plan.
Bram’s brows furrowed as he studied his brother. “Dinner with the boys… nothing out of the ordinary that I know of… why?”
Ram swallowed hard and took a deep breath. “I see Mom every year on our birthday.”
Bram shot up. “What? Why didn’t you tell me?” he barked, he wasn’t necessarily mad, but shocked. He would have never guessed Ram would have been able to hide something like that.
Ram raked a hand through his hair. “Not to sound like a dick, because I totally was, but I didn’t even think to. It’s not for long she meets me in the wooded area of that park that’s close by her house. I was wanting to know if you wanted to take everyone to see her. I plan to ask Kade to go with me.” He grimaced. God he really was a dick.
Bram let out a shaky breath. His mom had only seen Danno once when he’d been a newborn. She had defied their father to come see him, he knew she’d been hoping to get them to come back home but as soon as she had seen them he could tell she understood. “Yes, I want her to meet the boys.” He’d always dreamed of having his docile, sweet, warm mother meet his son’s after dealing with their fiery mother all their lives. He wanted to see how they would react to their grandmother.
Ram nodded. “I’ll head there at sunset, give me about half an hour so I can introduce her to Kade and then we’ll let the boys meet her. I’ll shoot you a text when we’re ready. I won’t tell her you’re coming, but she does ask about you every year.”
Bram already had his phone in his hand telling his sons they were required for dinner the next evening, which they had already been planning since it was their father and uncle’s birthday, but he really wanted this to happen. Now that he knew it was possible he wanted to see his mother whether the boys came with him or not.
“I’m sorry, Bram,” Ram said, softly. He’d been incredibly selfish, not even considering his own twin brother’s feelings in this. He’d wanted to keep his mother for himself. She was really the only person he’d ever had that had been on his side completely. While Bram had stood up for him, he never understood why their father had hated Ram so much.
Bram looked at his other half, the heads to his tails, the yin to his yang, who looked more like a kicked puppy at the moment than the strong man he knew him to be. “It’s okay, Ram, I won’t ever blame you for this.” He pulled his brother into a rough hug. He knew there was so much Ram kept hidden, the abuse from their childhood had done a number on his tenderhearted brother and he wanted to do whatever he could to help ease his pain. “I’ll get my side planned out, you just get Kade on board and we’ll see you there okay?”
Ram just nodded, pressing his face into his brother’s neck as he let the calm wash over him. He could always count on Bram to be the voice of reason when he was having trouble seeing the bigger picture. On his way back to his house he called Kade.
“Hey,” Kade said distractedly.
“Hey baby. Are you busy?” Ram asked, smiling. He already knew the answer to that. He could tell just by the way Kade was speaking, like he was a million miles away.
Kade sighed. “Always, but I can take a break for a minute. What’s up?” There was some shuffling of papers before Kade sighed again.
“Do you have plans for tomorrow night?” Ram asked.
“Other than giving you birthday sex, not that I know of,” Kade said nonchalantly.
Ram’s brain short circuited as he settled back into the couch. “Fuck me,” he grumbled, pushing down on his hard on that was currently trying to tattoo the ridge of his zipper into his flesh.
“Oh, I plan to,” Kade grumbled. While he adored Ram for being a gentleman he was seriously about to bash the man over the head with something, tie him to his bed and have his wicked way with him.
“Jesus, baby. What has gotten into you tonight?” Ram demanded.
“I don’t know, I’m just tired of waiting. I appreciate you being a gentleman but you know the saying: Gentleman in the streets, freak in the sheets,” Kade said, amusement clear in his tone.
Ram laughed. “We’ll talk, but I wanted to ask you something.” God he really wanted Kade under him, but his boy had so many hang-ups that Ram was trying to help ease him into it, but just the image alone had him close to coming in his jeans.
Kade made a humming noise. “What’s my favorite position? I’ve only done doggy, Devin didn’t like any other position and thinking back I’m kinda glad.”
Ram snorted. “I’ll just bet he did, but no that’s not the question, and hush up it has nothing to do with sex.” God Kade was trying to kill him. While he enjoyed a good doggy session he really wanted Kade spread out underneath him, face to face so he could watch those gorgeous eyes as he took the man apart.
Kade grumbled, not pleased.
“I’m going to see my mom tomorrow night, Bram is going to come later with all the boys… would you go with me? I really want her to meet you.” He wouldn’t lie and say the silence on the other side of the phone wasn’t making him nervous, but he knew Kade needed to think about it.
“Are you sure?” Kade asked, softly. “I know we’re kinda new and that’s a big step right?”
“Do you plan on going anywhere?” Ram fired back quickly.
“Well… no, of course not. You’re pretty much the only man who seems to want me for me,” Kade mumbled, he wouldn’t give that up without a fight, but he wasn’t the ‘meet the parent’s’ type.
“I do baby, I want everything from you,” Ram assured him.
“I mean… if that’s what you want then yes. I’d love to meet her.” Kade said the last part so softly Ram almost missed it. He would, he wanted to meet the woman who’d given life to his amazing man.
“Thank you baby, and I promise as a reward I will fuck you into the mattress,” Ram promised, breathlessly.
“Jesus.” Kade made a choking noise. “Fuck don’t say that, I’m still at the office and can’t be sporting wood around these idiots… It’ll give them a fucking complex.”
Ram sputtered out a laugh. Kade wasn’t lying though, his boy was definitely packing some heat. Heat he couldn’t wait to get his hands and mouth on.
“What time do you want me to be there tomorrow?” Kade asked when they were able to control their laughter.
“I don’t have to do anything tomorrow, so I may come join you for lunch and then you’re back on vacation right?” Ram asked, he’d been a little upset when Torres had called him into the office earlier today.
“I’m back on vacation tonight so I’ll be at the apartment. We had some new intel on the missing Marine that I needed to look at, but I’m wrapping up here now and will be heading home in a few minutes, as soon as Edwin gets here.”
Ram smiled. “Want some company?” he asked teasingly.
Kade snickered. “Always.”
Ram grinned, jumping up and grabbing his keys. “I’ll meet you there, baby.” He was already out of the door and getting into his truck when Kade replied.
“Bye Batty,” Kade said, laughter in his voice as he hung up.
Ram waited by Kade’s door playing on his phone until he heard the little taps of his boy’s cane and Valk’s vest creak as they moved. “Hey baby.” He knew Kade had already noticed he was there but he just wanted to see the man smile. It was fucking breathtaking. The fact that he alone could bring his boy that much pleasure made him feel like he was ten feet tall.
“Hey.” Kade smiled at him tossing Ram the keys so he could get the door open.
Ram grinned, opening the door and watching Kade as he went through his nightly routine. Shoes off inside the door and placed in a neat line on the mat next to the door, his cane leaned against the wall beside the shoes and his suit jacket hung on the hook, before he leaned down and unhooked Valk from his harness and hung it up next to his jacket. “So what’s the plan for tomorrow?” Kade asked as he headed towards the kitchen.
“Well we’ll head to the park, which is about thirty minutes from Austin so it’ll be about a forty five minute drive. My mom will meet us there at sunset. Bram and his crew will come about half an hour later so she can see all of us, but I really want her to meet you. I want her to know I’ve fallen for a man who will protect and cherish my heart, not abuse it.” Ram really wanted his mother to know that he was okay, he knew she worried about him terribly and he felt like a total jackass for doing nothing to help ease her worry. He’d never been ready for a long term relationship until he’d met Kade, and he wouldn’t have it any other way.
Kade swallowed hard, while Ram hadn’t said the words Kade could read between the lines. “I’ll always protect and cherish it, Ram… always. It’s the greatest thing I’ve been granted in this life, and it makes everything I went through, to get to you, worth it.”
Ram’s eyes filled with tears, this was all he had ever wanted in his life. A partner who could match him in everything, someone who would love him even through his trauma. He smiled and gave a watery laugh. Leave it to him to find a man even more damaged to fall in love with. He gently cupped Kade’s face, bringing their lips together in a tender kiss. “I love you, Kade.” He had to tell his boy. He had to actually say the words and not hint at them, he needed Kade to know he loved him. Yes it was fast to most people but he’d secretly had a thing for the man for years so the pace they were going at was kind of slow in his eyes.
Kade gently traced Ram’s face, wiping the tears from his cheeks as he pictured the gorgeous man in his mind. He would never forget how intense and vivid Ram’s bluish gray eyes were, the handsome face with high cheekbones and a strong jaw. He could feel the little lines that appeared at the corner of Ram’s eyes when he smiled, and he smiled back. “I love you too, Ram,” he murmured as he continued his way of seeing his man again. He licked his lips and swallowed when he traced over Ram’s lips, the full bottom one, then the thinner top lip. He gasped when a warm wet tongue lapped at his fingers. Kade leaned forward to kiss him again, he needed the contact after a long day. He’d been called to the office over twenty hours ago and he was tired as fuck and just wanted a moment to enjoy his man and relax.
“You okay, baby?” Ram asked, as he pulled away to study Kade. His boy’s kisses were becoming more intense and he could feel the stress and tension in Kade’s thick shoulders.
Kade sighed, slumping into Ram and resting his head in Ram’s neck. “Just tired, it was a long day.” He really wanted to throw the man down and have his way with him but he was kind of worried he’d fall asleep during it. Nothing worse than falling asleep during sex.
Ram could agree with that, it really should scare the shit out of him that he’d been so out of sorts without Kade by his side today. “I bet, why don’t we go take a shower then head to bed early, we can even sleep in tomorrow morning,” Ram teased.
Kade chuckled. “Deal.” He couldn’t wait for a lazy day with his man.
Ram led Kade to the bathroom and helped him strip. He was happy now that Kade had gotten to know him better that he didn’t tense up or freak out at being naked around him anymore. While the scars that littered Kade’s body would always take his breath away it wasn’t because they were ugly, it was because it showed how strong his boy was. He had literally been tortured and beaten in a way that he should not have survived, but yet here he was thriving in spite of what had been done to him. He was so fucking proud to call this man his and he planned to show Kade just how much for the rest of their lives. He made sure the water wasn’t too warm, knowing Kade’s scars could be sensitive to the heat, before he ushered him into the stall. Thankfully Kade had a shower stall instead of the traditional tub/shower combo.
Kade settled against the tiled wall as he let the warm water beat down on his tired body. He couldn’t figure out why he was so damn tired all the time now, and it was starting to piss him off. He knew Ram would just tell him ‘It was his body’s way of taking what it needed’, but it still grated on his very frayed nerves. He felt like he was missing so much because he couldn’t keep his mind online. He wanted to learn everything about Ram and do all the things he’d secretly wanted to but he didn’t have the energy.
“Were you able to find out anything new?” Ram asked as he pressed their bodies together and kissed Kade on the cheek.
Kade sighed. While he couldn’t give Ram any details, he really liked the fact that his man asked. Devin had never seemed to care what he did as long as he paid him attention when he wanted it. “We found more clues to make us think this was an inside job.”
Ram couldn’t even imagine what the young man was going through, but that was only if he was still alive. “Damn.”
Kade grunted in agreement as he slid his hands over Ram’s wet body. He loved that he was just able to touch him, that Ram didn’t expect anything else to happen. He could just touch and be touched without having to time it before he was supposed to do something else. While he was almost desperate to be able to have Ram fully, he knew they were both too afraid of jumping the gun to rush into things. He would never tell Ram, but he appreciated that more than he could say. The easy relationship they had built was something he would always cherish whether they worked out or not. “I can’t decide if I hope he’s alive or dead. I hope he’s alive for his sister’s sake, but for his own…” Kade shook his head. He didn’t even want to think about what the young man could be going through at this very moment. If he did live he’d never be the same again and sometimes thinking it would be better if he didn’t was almost too much to bear.
Ram nodded, understanding what Kade meant by that statement. He grinned as Kade continued to run his hands over his body, it was like his boy was trying to paint himself a picture of what he looked like. He grabbed one of Kade’s hands and brought it up to his face, kissing the tips of his fingers. “Are you nervous about tomorrow?” he asked softly. He really didn’t want Kade to be nervous, he knew his mother would immediately adore the man, but he also knew that Kade struggled with any type of emotional dealings. He was about to take Kade so far out of his comfort zone it wasn’t even funny, and he was so proud of his boy for pushing himself to try, he just hoped Kade wasn’t pushing himself too far too fast and end up paying for it later.
“I won’t lie and say no, but it’s more of a low level anxiety type feeling, like a low hum in the back of my mind. I’m not good at meeting new people, and they never know how to act around me. I don’t want to make things weird for you or your mother,” Kade mumbled, tracing Ram’s full lips. That was one of his biggest fears, he had no doubt that the woman who raised Ram would be kind and gentle, but he hated to put the unintentional pressure of him being blind into the mix. People always felt like they had to do everything for him, or take him places like he couldn’t get there on his own. He’d had many meetings with clients and other members of his social circle go bad very quickly because they started to treat him like an invalid. He had earned every skill he’d ever learned in the military, he had worked his ass off for years, he wouldn’t take handouts or take kindly to someone just ‘trying to help’. They ended up being more insulting than anything because they felt the need to narrate and talk too much, like just because he was blind meant he couldn’t enjoy the solitude?
Oh his sweet boy. “You won't,” Ram assured him. “I know my mom will love you, while it might take her a second to get used to the fact that you are blind, that wouldn’t be a slight against you. I’m not sure if my mother has ever been around a blind person before. She would be more worried about insulting you in some way because she doesn’t understand our way of life. Back in my old family you would have been seen as a burden, a punishment, to my parents for some kind of wrong doing, but the way my mother cares for my sister tells me she’ll adore you no matter what. My mother is a sweet loving woman, she may hug you to death, but that’s about it.”
Kade chuckled. “I don’t want you to think that I don’t want to meet her…” he started.
“But you’re anxious about going into a new environment and meeting a new person. I know, baby, and I understand that,” Ram interrupted. “If it gets to be too much, I can go alone. I just really want my mom to see that I’m okay. She’s always worried about me because I’ve been alone while Bram is married and has his own army of kids,” Ram told him. “I don’t want you to feel like I’m pushing for this.” He paused to take a deep breath, he’d never forgive himself if Kade was pushing himself just to make him happy. He would have to keep an eye on that, Kade seemed to be a people pleaser in relationships and he wanted his boy to know it was okay to be selfish sometimes.
Kade shook his head. “No, I don’t. I understand your reasoning and I do want to meet her Ram, I promise. It’s just I’ve kinda become a hermit since I got back, I only go to work or stay at home. The deli and The Diner are the only public places I really go, and I’m rarely ever alone when I go.” He raked his fingers through his hair as the water pelted his chest. “I want to meet the woman you adore so much, but look how long it took me to see Saint again and go to the farm, I just don’t want you to get your hopes up and then be disappointed if it doesn’t go well.”
Ram chuckled. “Yet, you managed to get me obsessed with you.”
Kade rolled his eyes. “You’re just weird,” he grumbled.
Ram popped him on the ass for his sass.
Kade chuckled, even as his cock filled from the heat. So he liked to be spanked, well that was new.
Ram chuckled darkly. “I see someone liked that.”
Kade had to clear his throat, and tried to ignore the heat infusing his face. “You don’t make me feel weird, or like I should be ashamed for wanting something different. I also feel safe with you and you never do anything to actually hurt me… I can’t tell you how much that means to me. You never treat me like I’m a delicate flower either, you trust me to be able to tell you if I don’t like something.” He tapped the tip of each finger against his thumb, a habit he’d picked up as a kid, as he tried to tell Ram what he meant to him. He was a grown ass man, but he’d never had someone he wanted as much as he did Ram.
Ram’s heart warmed. He had no idea how he could tell Kade he would never make him regret giving him a chance. “I love you, Kade.”
Kade swallowed roughly. “I love you too, Ram.” As soon as he finished saying the words, he grunted as Ram slammed him against the shower wall.
Ram sank to his knees and without any warning took Kade’s hard dick to the back of his throat.
“Oh fuck, oh shit.” Kade scrambled for purchase on Ram’s shoulders as his body exploded with so much pleasure it almost hurt.
Ram swallowed as Kade came down his throat. He stood grinning as Kade continued to be racked by aftershocks.
“Fuck me… that was embarrassing,” Kade grumbled, running his palms roughly down his cheeks. He couldn’t seem to get control over his body as he jerked every few moments as another aftershock took hold.
Ram chuckled. “I take it as a compliment… I didn’t even get to suck and you were already coming down my throat. You want me that much, that makes me feel good.” He gently caressed Kade’s flaming cheek. He would never make fun of Kade, he couldn’t imagine just how long it had been since Kade had had a blowjob. Or even had any pleasure from a partner without being expected to do something in return. He planned to have the dazed look and relaxed body from Kade a lot in the future, it was time for the man to learn how a real partner treated the person they loved. While he had no doubt there would be fights and anger from both sides, they were grown men and set in their own way, he couldn’t wait to see what was in store for both of them as the years passed.
“Jesus.” Kade huffed as his dick hardened again. The sound of Ram’s voice, the heat of his body, his scent was driving him insane. He was a little thrown for a loop, with Devin he hadn’t experienced much of a sex drive and only had sex with him rarely when he was in town, but with Ram he wanted the man all the time. For him to be touching him or near him, or hell even inside of him. He didn’t care, he just wanted it to happen.
Ram smiled. “Good, you’re not done, let’s move to the bed. I want a better taste.” He was going to enjoy Kade’s recovery time. He’d always had a high drive himself and had loved to have sex as often as he could, it was a good way for him to relax and let go of the stressors of life, and to have someone who could match him in the quick recovery area was a perk he was looking forward to exploiting. While he’d meant what he’d told Kade at the beginning, to have him finding himself and building confidence in his body was amazing and Ram was so fucking happy for him. He would show Kade that he loved him when the words wouldn’t reach him in the dark times to come.
Kade gripped the base of his cock, hard. “You can’t say shit like that Ram, damnit.” God he felt like he was fourteen again and the wind would shift and it would make him horny as shit.
Ram laughed, pulling Kade behind him into the bedroom before pushing him back on the bed. He sank to his knees by the foot of the bed and moved in between Kade’s spread legs. He trailed his hands gently from Kade’s ankles up his calves and thighs before he gripped his waist and tugged him closer to the edge of the bed. He didn’t immediately go for his boy’s cock, wanting him to calm down some more or he’d blow like last time, instead he went for the balls. He wouldn’t lie, Kade had a beautiful pair. Full, heavy, and hanging they were the perfect size to just suck one into his mouth.
“Fuck,” Kade grunted, his legs spreading wider giving Ram more room to work. The way this man could play his fucking body like an instrument should piss him off but he was too floaty to even be bothered.
Ram tongued out one ball before he dove for the other one. He loved that Kade kept his balls clean shaven and had a bush at the base of his dick. While he would never tell Kade what to do with his own body, he did prefer the balls to be clean. Nothing worse than going to town and having a ball hair tickle the roof of his mouth, it totally ruined the mood. He continued to torture Kade, not sucking hard enough to send him over, but to leave him with a pleasant warmth that coursed through his body.
“Fuck, Ram, please,” Kade begged. He didn’t even know what he was begging for, he just wanted the man to do something to ease the heat building in his stomach. He moaned when Ram’s finger brushed over his taint. God this man was going to kill him. He didn’t know what the fuck to do with all this pleasure, or how to feel about it when it was only him receiving it. He wanted to make Ram feel just as good as he was making him feel because holy shit the man had a talented tongue.
Ram grinned, before he sat up and sucked Kade’s dick back into his mouth. He loved the reactions he was getting from his boy. The wild legs, the gripping fingers in his hair, and the sounds. The fucking sounds Kade released made him want to blow his load right then and there. He had to grip the base of his dick hard as Kade’s moans threatened to send him over before he was ready. He didn’t want to come until he had milked all he could from his boy. He'd suffer until then, he had no qualms about forcing himself to wait as he overloaded Kade with so much pleasure the man would be wrung out.
“Yes!” Kade groaned, his hands going back into Ram’s hair to have something to keep him from blowing away. His legs twitched and kicked out as he tried to hold himself back and enjoy the warm wet heat his dick was currently engulfed in.
Ram went slowly, he wanted Kade to enjoy this not just come and be done. He pulled off with a salacious pop making Kade shudder. “Turn over baby.” He tapped Kade’s thigh helping him to roll over onto his stomach. “Stay right here.” He halted Kade’s movements when he tried to move further up the bed. Kade was bent over the bed at the waist and it left him in the perfect position for what Ram wanted to do to him.