Chapter 28
Torren
I startle when I wake up with Felix wrapped in my arms. It hits me that I’ve never woken up with anyone like this before. I’m usually a hookup guy—get in and get out.
Literally.
But it’s hard to ignore how nice this feels. That doesn’t matter, though. Friends with benefits can fuck, but cuddling like this feels like something else, so I need to get up…
In a minute.
I’ll get up in a minute.
Last night wasn’t perfect, but it was a step forward.
I felt myself losing it during sex, but the cuffs kept me under control.
It’s hard to understand why this is happening with Felix.
I’ve had plenty of sex with other people and never got this wound up.
With Felix, it’s like my psyche splits in half, and a war between me now and the seventeen-year-old beast that killed dozens of people begins.
When things get hot with Felix, it’s all-consuming. It’s a combination of reverence and possessiveness. The walls I’ve built to protect myself come crashing down. The intimacy shifts into aggression, and I find myself yearning to put my hands on Felix in all the wrong ways.
Last night worked, but what if I break free from the cuffs? What if we get hot and heavy somewhere with no restraints, and I lose it?
I pinch the bridge of my nose, trying to calm down. My chest feels compressed, like there’s a heavy rock on top of me, as my mind conjures a million scenarios of me hurting Felix.
Take a breath, Torren.
I’m not like that right now, which I’m so grateful for. The faint little snores he makes stop, and his eyes blink open before looking up at me.
“Hi,” he says in his groggy state.
“Hey.”
Felix rests his head on my chest once more. “I can feel your heartbeat,” he whispers.
I don’t know why, but that makes my gut twist. My body suddenly feels cold, and I chew on my bottom lip.
Felix hums with concern, then rises from my chest. “Are you okay?” he asks.
I’m not. God, I’m such a fucked up mess. I don’t understand why my body reacts this way to him, but I have to figure it out.
Later.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” I assure him. “Kinda hungry.” I’m not that hungry, but I need to move.
Felix rests his head on his hand, a little smile appearing. “Mmm, same. Got any more of those donuts I brought?”
“I crushed the whole box the morning after.” I’m not even a little embarrassed. Those donuts are out of this freaking world.
“Pig,” he says while giving my stomach a little slap.
“Fuck you,” I reply with a laugh.
Felix rolls over, lying on his back with one arm resting on me. “Damn. I wanted a Maggie donut. I miss them.”
“We can always get some. You know the restaurant’s open.”
Felix shakes his head, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. “I’m too embarrassed. I didn’t give much notice when I quit.” He pauses for a moment, his eyes fixed on the ceiling, lost in thought. Suddenly, he sits upright, resting a hand on my thigh. “You were there recently, right?”
I nod, and he asks, “Has she replaced me yet?”
“It was just her and Gilda when I visited. Not really sure if she hired anyone else.”
Felix looks off for a moment, his eyes scanning the room, before saying. “You know what? I do want to go to Maggie’s. Is that cool with you?”
I can’t help but smile because I know exactly where this is going. I sit upright and stretch, my heart finally settling down.
Felix’s eyes meet mine, and he asks, “Do you regret last night?”
The honest answer is no. I don’t regret anything. “Not at all.”
My only concern is making sure we maintain our friends-with-benefits status. I can’t let us slide into romance.
Felix sits on his knees and asks, “You’ll tell me if things get too much? Talk to me?”
My voice gets caught on the emotion clogging my throat, but I push it through. “I-I’ll try.”
“You don’t have to elaborate if you’re not ready to talk about certain things. I just need a “Hey, this is doing something, and I need…” and then you let me know what you need. Okay?”
Not many people would be as understanding as he is right now, and it makes this whole thing so much easier. “Okay. Thank you.”
His brilliant smile squashes the last of my anxiety. He hops off the bed and makes his way to the bathroom. “Let’s wash up and head over to Maggie’s. I’ve gotta get my job back.”
Felix
Waking up in Torren’s arms was better than a fantasy. I mean, most of my fantasies consist of the man hogtying me and using my mouth, so the sweetness was a pleasant surprise!
My brain is still a whirlwind of questions, though. Are we going to stay as “just friends” or is this going to evolve? And will he need the restraints forever? Am I going to be sitting on his bed one day when an old enemy from his gang days comes in with a machine gun?
What an onion of complexities this Mr. Kay is.
Whatever. For now, I am just going to enjoy this.
‘Cause, goddamn that dick hits all the right spots.
If he needs to be locked in a metal box with just a hole for his penis, so be it, because I am not going back to a life of not getting nailed by Torren Kay.
The man has a gift. His cock is long, thick, and veiny.
It doesn’t curve like a candy cane, and it’s not thin like a Twizzler.
It’s a big, thick dick that stretches me just right.
Swoon.
His bike rolls into Maggie’s parking lot, and we both hop off and make our way to the restaurant.
The moment we enter, Maggie squeals, “Not the one who broke my heart!”
Torren rubs the back of his head, rocking on his feet. “I know it’s been a minute, Maggie. Sorry, I haven’t—”
“Not you, dipshit. I’m talkin’ to Felix!”
Gilda barrels through the double doors, having probably been wrapping silverware in the back or something, and screams, “FELIX! I’ve been so worried.”
Maggie nods and adds, “You looked rough when you quit. How are you feeling, honey?”
Jesus, I didn’t expect them to react this way when they saw me. I’m getting kind of emotional. “I’m a lot better,” I assure them. “I’ve missed you both.”
Gilda clears her throat and makes eyes at Torren. “So…” she says. “This is going…well?”
Torren and I look at each other, somewhat flummoxed on how to answer that.
We speak at the same time, with me saying, “It’s casual,” and Torren saying, “We’re friends.”
Gilda nods, and Maggie says, “Sounds complicated. I’m too old for complicated. Fuck me or move it along.”
I bark out a laugh, and Torren pinches the bridge of his nose.
“Want a spot at the bar?” Gilda asks.
Torren nods, and we take a seat. “How are you going to act when you actually get what you order?” I ask Torren.
A devilish look washes over his face. “Once you get your job back, there’s no telling what I’ll get for breakfast.”
“Job back?” Gilda screeches with raised brows.
My fingers trail over the countertop as I sheepishly ask, “Yeah… would Maggie take me back?”
Before Gilda can say anything, Maggie exits through the double doors with an apron and a hat. “I thought you’d never ask. Get to work, kid.”
I pick up the apron and turn to Torren. “That was a lot easier than I expected.”
“Get to work,” he barks.
“Shut up! You can’t talk to the servers that way.” We both laugh, and the impulse to lean in and kiss him is palpable, but I stop myself.
Friends don’t kiss like that…
We just fuck the shit out of each other.