Chapter 20 Amelia
Amelia
I’ve been a mixed bag of nerves and excitement all day. There were a few times I caught people staring at my baby bump on campus, but I pushed on and ignored every single one. I’m not there to make friends. I have a plan and I’m going to stick to it, keeping to myself.
Leaning back in my desk chair, I rub my stomach as I go over my first assignment for English Lit. A yawn escapes me, and I glance over at the bed. I’m desperate to slide in between the sheets and curl up, but I have another hour of schoolwork to do before I can.
My phone rings and Clare’s name flashes up across the screen. She hasn’t called in weeks, and I pick up without hesitation.
“Hey,” I say, and I’m met with her sobs filling the line.
“Clare?”
Panic grows in my chest, and I stand, needing to move as if it somehow helps.
“He left me, he just drove away, and I have no money…”
“Who, Tariq?”
“Yeah, the fucking asshole.”
“Where are you?”
“You know the old train tracks behind the oil plant?”
I vaguely know of it, and I’m slipping into my shoes and grabbing my car keys as I ask, “What the hell were you doing out there?”
“Don’t ask. Will you come get me please?”
“Of course. Stay on the line until I get to you.”
The roads are mainly empty as I drive to a part of the city I’ve not been to before. I only know of the oil plant because it’s been a hot topic of discussion on the news on how to use it to benefit the city.
“Clare, are you still there?” I ask after it’s been too quiet for too long.
“Yeah, are you close. The fucking hobos keep staring, I swear if any of them touch me, I’m going to kill Tar.”
“I’m not far.” To keep her talking and distracted, I ask, “Did you have a fight or something?”
It’s a stupid question, they obviously did unless he makes a habit of this that I’m not aware of. Which is a possibility. I’ve not exactly been in regular contact with her. Who knows what’s been going on.
“It was nothing, but he just cut me off and drove off. I thought he was going to come back but it’s been an hour.”
She doesn’t need or want to hear that he’s an asshole. So I keep my lips firmly shut and drive through a set of broken gates next to the plant.
“Okay, I’m close but I don’t know where I’m going.”
“I’m not…”
My headlights light her up and she rushes toward the car. I release a lighter breath than the ones I’ve been taking on the way here.
She jumps in and I quickly lock the doors as I look around and see mini camps of homeless people, some staring our way, but most too drunk or high to notice we’re here.
“What the hell are you doing here, Clare?”
I deserve an answer after coming to her aid. I take in her appearance, and I can’t believe what I’m seeing. Her makeup has run down her cheeks, the little black dress I know used to cling to her, hangs limply in certain places and her hair isn’t as perfectly maintained as it used to be.
“Tar had some business to do, then we had a fight and he left. Can we please get out of here?” she snaps.
A bang on my window has me jumping in my seat and my heart pounding in my chest.
A skinny guy with only two broken yellow teeth in his mouth stands too close and I push my foot down on the gas, not caring if I hit anyone.
“Anything could’ve happened to me,” she begins to say once we’re back on the highway. “Fucking asshole.”
I turn the music on hoping it will soothe her and save me from saying the wrong thing.
It seems to work and it’s not until I pull up to her gates that she sits forward and says, “Why did you bring me here?”
Looking her in the eye, I say, “Because it’s where you live?”
“No-no. I need to go to Tariq’s.”
“I thought you hated him? He just left you in the middle of a homeless encampment where anything could’ve happened to you.”
How is it I need to remind her?
“How can I tell him that if I’m here?”
Losing my patience, I snap, “I’m not a taxi service, Clare. I’ve got an early class tomorrow and I have an assignment to start before I can even think of going to sleep.”
“Please?” she pleads.
“Clare, I’m worried about you. I think you should stay here, or come to mine. We haven’t seen each other in so long. I can run you a nice bath, you can sleep tonight and sort this out tomorrow.”
For a moment I think I’ve gotten through to her, but she shakes her head and I notice her hand shaking.
“We can do all that tomorrow, but I need to see him now. I won’t be able to sleep. I need him.”
Her anxious need worries the hell out of me, but I put the car in reverse and don’t bother speaking another word.
Her leg bounces the whole journey to Tariq’s house and when she doesn’t see his car here, her anger returns but I block out her rant and see that Darius is sat out on the front porch.
He’ll recognise my car for sure and I certainly don’t have time to deal with him.
When I woke up this morning and he was gone, I vowed everything I felt for him had to be locked away.
I have to get used to him being nothing more than the father of my daughter and one day I will get there. I just hope it’s soon.
“Go on, get out,” I mutter, and it hurts when she doesn’t catch my tone.
“I’ll call you tomorrow, yeah?” she rushes out throwing open the door. She doesn’t even say goodbye and I don’t hang around to watch her walk up the front path.
We’re obviously on different paths and I pull away knowing I won’t hear from her tomorrow.