Chapter 1
I”ve planned to take a day off and sleep all day.
Sounds fair, no?
I need it.
My body needs it.
But of course, my brain doesn”t get the memo and wakes me up at five a.m. I just want to scream. I have gotten so used to my routine that I can’t force myself to sleep past that hour. It”s fucking frustrating!
After taking my bag I choose to hop on my bike. It”s faster than my car and I”ll be at Icylight in no time. It”s my favorite rink where I usually train and the perfect place when I need to hide.
Zipping my jacket, I pick up my full-face helmet and wear it. Dad wasn”t happy at all for me to ride a bike, but honestly, you can die even in a car and the bike is sexy and makes me feel free.
Hearing the Busa roar it”s like feeling life injected in my veins while its vibration zips over my skin. I can”t explain how powerful it is. Driving across the city with barely nobody around is fantastic. You can enjoy the sunrise and the city that starts to wake up.
Entering the Icylight makes me smile. This is where I”ve grown up and where I feel safe.
I started skating when I was three, it was the best experience ever. Mom and I used to skate together, and I was so excited, I still am each time I wear my ice skates. Each time I step on the ice everything disappears. It”s like walking in a magical parallel universe where everything is possible, and you can be whatever you want to be.
“Mommy, what if I fall?”
She approaches a little more and extends her hands. “You’ll get up and try again.” She smiles as I try to move my leg. “That’s one of the lessons you need to keep in mind, cupcake, life will always throw something at you and you should always keep your head up and never let anyone and anything put you down.”
And she was right. I didn’t know what she meant by then but now I’m fully aware of it. Life’s not easy. People either. Don’t get me wrong, there are good people in the world and those are your tribe. Unfortunately we tend to have some shifty ones around us.
I sprint feeling the air caress my face as I turn and move to the rhythm of the imaginary song that plays in my head. After an axel jump, my eyes catch some movement, and I come to a halt. The Devils, our hockey team, is lined up, waiting for me to finish my train.
Skating off to the exit, the Zamboni cleans the ice.
“Hey, gorgeous, happy birthday,” says Luke. I have known him forever. He”s like my brother and he was the one who has introduced me to his best friend, Blake a.k.a my ex.
“Thank you, Luke. How”s it going?” After hugging him, I bend down to untie my skates.
“Same life, looking forward to celebrating tonight.”
“Don”t say it out loud, your coach is here.” I giggle at him. “shouldn’t it be a surprise for me?”
He rolls his eyes, well aware Dad already told me. “Ash,” he sighs. “we haven”t talked since… you know, the whole story with Blake happened. I just wanted to say I”m sorry.”
“That”s okay, Luke. It wasn”t your fault.” I squeeze his arm, eyeing the coach approaching. Luke knew I’m not a one-night person and he vouched for his best friend. Not that it was him to push me toward Blake, but I know he’s always been overprotective since we were in kindergarten and our breakup concerns him.
He leans in. “What happened?”
That”s the million-dollar question everyone wants to know but my answer is always the same. “It wasn”t meant to be.”
“You sure? I”ve heard he…”
“Thirty-six on ice, now!” the coach shouts, making us jump.
“Balls,” he sighs. “Have to go, talk to you later.”
“Past is past,” I say with a nod. I have never told anyone but Kelly why Blake and I broke up. I was too ashamed to tell everyone he wanted something I couldn”t give him, or I wanted to, and when he forced me to, I knew it was the end for us. The truth is Blake was a perfect douchebag, he has never respected me or my profession. For him, I was just a silly girl dancing on her skates, so after almost two months we killed our relationship and I have focused on my career. I”ve promised myself I won”t let anyone make me feel miserable or broken as he did.
Never again.
Riding back home, I try to guess where Kelly has booked for my surprise birthday party. She always had the craziest ideas, but honestly, this time I have no clue.
When I get home, I already feel exhausted. I knew it was a bad idea to train today but as always, I made the wrong choice. A nap is mandatory since Kelly has texted me saying at nine p.m. I have to go to her place. Again, no hints. She”s trying to play mysterious and this time I can”t figure out what she”s up to.
Parking in front of Kelly”s house, I get out of the car. As I lean on the hood, I pick up my cell phone and start to type her a text, but her door opens and she rushes by.
“Happy birthday, Ash.” She pops some confetti before peering at me. “You”re hot as hell, girl!”
“Thank you,” I pivot to show her my new dress. “I thought this would be the right outfit for celebrating my birthday wherever you’re taking me.” I hug her. “I wanna go to a strip club.”
Her mouth drops open. “Okay, where”s Ashley we all know? The shy, lovely bitch?” I burst out laughing, giving her a middle finger. “No seriously, Ash. Are you okay?”
“I am, silly. I was teasing you since I have no idea what you”re up to.”
“Okay, here”s a hint,” she pauses. “we”ll go to a club.” I look at her puzzled, I mean we have just a dozen of clubs here in Newtok. “not a strip club though, and not where your dad can spot us.”
“Hmm, okay, that trims to four clubs where you could book us.” I laugh while starting the engine.
After tugging her seatbelt, Kelly claps her hands. “If you haven”t figured it out, even better.”
Rolling my eyes in a dramatic way I drive away from the parking lot. “How can I drive if I don”t know where to?”
“I”ll be your wingman.”
Checking the rearview I overtake a car. “Great, then we”ll never get there. At least not tonight.”
“Hey,” she crosses her arms over her chest, pretending to be offended. “it happened once.”
“Thank God, we ended up in Colorado when we should have been up in Washington D.C.”
“No one is perfect, Miss gold medal.” She mocks me. Even though I”ve won some prizes and medals I don”t like to brag about them. Something she doesn”t get. If it were for her, I”d have a monument with my name on it.
“Ha! I know but that means you suck as a wingman.”
“True.” She giggles. “Okay, then, we’ll go to ZBE.”
“Oh, wow. For the hot guys or there’s another reason?” I ask, implying why anyone wants to go there. Their cocktails seem to be sublime as is the music, but their staff are hot as hell.
After forty minutes I park my car and kill the engine while reaching for my bag. The ZBE is one of the exclusive clubs here in Newtok. It’s out of the downtown area and she was right, Dad would never come here. They check anyone”s ID; the bouncer is someone you don”t want to mess up with. Proud to display his patches and I think that”s why we never hear something bad about this club. The Black Panthers are well-known around here. Seems like the city is divided between those who respect them and the ones who fear but still hate them. I’ve always been a fan. Not sure if because of their reputation or the prohibition of getting close. I admit I rode close to their neighborhood but never dared to get in there. The bouncer eyes me and I realize I’m staring at him. Ops, sorry man, not my type but those muscles should be illegal.
Kelly takes out her golden pass and I snap my head at her. “How on the earth…?”
Grabbing my shoulders she forces me to look at her. “Promise me, you will enjoy tonight without pondering everything. Free your mind for once.”
“Okay, I promise,” I smile as she pushes me into the club. The music is not as loud as I thought, and hell, it”s crowded too. Spotting some of our friends in the VIP area I wave at them but before reaching them, Kelly drags me to the bar.
The bartender rolls his shaker while his eyes land on us. “Hey, gorgeous, what can I get you?”
“A Cuba Libre for me.” Kelly orders while looking around.
“I’d take a Cosmo and hey, could you please add just a little alcohol to mine? Not the whole quantity.” I’m not sure if he’s surprised or offended by my request but then his eyes skirt behind me.
“Good evening, Rock.” He greets with a nod.
I roll my eyes because he didn’t even answer me.
“Evening, J.” I pivot looking at the man whose voice makes me cover in goosebumps and I freeze in place. Holy crap! Even in my forbidden dreams, I couldn”t picture someone as sexy as him. When he looks down at me, I feel like I”m catching on fire but his eyes, oh sweet mother of God. Music fades and my heartbeat is the only sound I can hear.
“Are you afraid of drinking, Princess?”
Is he speaking to me? I open my mouth to reply but Kelly cuts me off.
“It”s her birthday and she doesn”t want to get drunk.” she leers at him. “I”m Kelly, by the way.”
“Rock,” he answers, not taking his eyes off mine. I think I”m melting right on the spot. Get a grip, Ash, what a fuck!
“I”m Ashley, and yes I don”t want to get wasted tonight.” I try to move my gaze away but it”s like I can”t.
“Happy birthday, Ashley.” He smiles, stepping forward. “J, make sure her drinks are half of the dose.”
The powerful aura he has makes me want to touch him. Even though he”s wearing a leather jacket, I can see he”s a mass of muscles and that beard adds so much sexiness to his appearance. My eyes land on his patch but he turns away. Is he a biker too? It can’t be, he’s too clean and classy for it.
“On it, Rock.”
“Enjoy your night, Princess.” He extends his arm and takes his beer before moving away.
Do not look back. Don’t you dare.
I can still sense his cologne. If that’s how my night will be, I may think of becoming a regular member because fuck me, I have just squirmed in my pants.
“Here you go, enjoy,” the bartender says, winking at Kelly.
“I want to dance the whole night.” Kelly shouts over the music. “What are you looking at?” she asks, following my gaze. “You should invite him to our VIP area.”
Shaking my head to her silliness I cling to her arm, forcing myself to look away from Rock. “Come on, Kelly. Do you think he’s single? He’s not.” I roll my eyes while taking a sip of my drink.
“You don’t know it.”
“Please, I don’t need a boyfriend.” I whim in exasperation. After Blake and I broke up she has tried to combine some blind dates I”ve never gone on.
“Who said you need one,” she sips her drink, but I haven”t missed her smile. “but you can get laid tonight.” I choke on my Cosmopolitan. “Your V card is about to expire, love,” she whispers into my ear, making me laugh.
Shaking my head at her, I move to the other side. “Not tonight and not with a random guy.”
“Live it up, Ash, you won”t regret it!” she winks at me while dragging me toward the VIP area.
The ZBE is one of my creations. Running The Black Panthers Motorcycle Club is not the only thing I do. I don’t want to get in trouble with the new sheriff, even though we kinda get along. We”ve made a deal almost a decade ago: he won’t bother us, and we’ll keep the town out of drugs and get rid of The Vipers. Those motherfuckers were selling drugs in schools, and I can’t stand that shit. Kids are off-limits for our clubs and for our smoke too. He agreed and as long as I stay out of trouble he won”t come for us.
I like seeing how much this town loves our clubs, maybe because they don’t know The Black Panthers are running them but that’s not something they should worry about. We”re not that bad, we”re worse than the outlawed and loyal toward our brothers, values and club.
Walking in ZBE tonight feels different. I don”t know how to explain it, it”s not like the normal Friday nights we used to have.
Seeing the beauty bomb in front of me makes my heart race. A powerful twinge happens in my chest cutting my breath off. What the fuck just happened?
I have plenty of girls around here, or at the Strip and even at the Clubhouse but it seems like she’s put a spell on me. Her voice is so darn sweet that awakes the beast in me and I”m wondering if her moans have that delicious sound too. I need to get the fuck out of here because I’m not a horny teenager anymore even though I feel like one of them.
Walking away with my beer I try to calm the fuck down. I”m here to work and then go home. Taking a generous gulp of my beer I try to forget her eyes but fuck me it”s so difficult. I rub my eyes and take a deep breath.
The office doors close but I don”t move, I spot Denise getting in. “Hey, Rock, you okay?”
“Yeah, Di,” I say looking out of the window down to the dance floor where she”s enjoying the song. “We need a few more bouncers,” I try to get a grip and focus my brain on work.
She sighs while sitting on a stool. “Can”t Blue or Brick take care of it?”
“You know why I’m asking you.”
She lights a cigarette. “It sucks being your friend, you know?”
“You love me.” I chuckle, taking place behind my desk.
“You’re family, Rock.” she sighs. “I see it more like a man”s task though.”
I look up at her, I know she wants to be more involved in our business, but I also know once you’re in you can’t get away and I’m not sure she has realized it. She’s great at keeping an eye on our Clubhouse and taking at bay my brothers. “Di, I know you want to go for the cargo, but I can’t involve you.” I just want to keep you safe. I’ve buried way too many brothers and family that I want, for once, to relax.
“No one fucks with The Black Panthers; the question is from who do you want to keep me safe?” She clips in an angry voice. “You know it’s bullshit. You’re scared that if I’d end up with a bullet in my head, I’ll come hunting you.”
“No,” I slam my hands on the desk, startling her. “you’re not following my orders and have a say on everything, Di. You have the patches because of Nathan but you’re family and I’ll never put you in danger, got it?” Her eyes widen in surprise. I never got too serious with her but in the last two months she became a pain, and God knows how much I care for her. “You want to get more involved? Good. The Black Panthers’ shadow business is not for you, which means you can either choose to stay in the charter or run one of our businesses outside. Your choice.”
Denise is one of the best I have in my club and takes no shit from anyone. The problem is she can’t shut her mouth.
“Can I pick one?” Her eyes sparkle.
I get up feeling the urge to scan the club. “I thought I was pretty clear.”
“Finney’s.” She murmurs. “Can I?”
“I was hoping you would but you won’t move out of the neighborhood and you’ll get paired with Mason and Fox.” Finney’s is a dinner where she and Nathan met. That place was my wedding gift for them but after Nathan’s death I couldn’t ask her to keep an eye on it. She wasn’t ready. Until now. Which also means less work for me.
Spotting the Princess having fun with her friends somehow makes me calm a little more and I go sit back in my chair.
She smiles, tilting her head to the side looking at me. “Are you sure you”re okay?” She teases me. “However, J told me we have a birthday party booked tonight.”
“Yeah, I”ve heard about it.” I sigh, peering at some paperwork I suddenly find interesting.
Getting closer, Denise bends the papers with a finger. “She”s cute, isn”t she?”
“Di, say whatever you wanna tell me, I have to work.”
“Uh-oh, someone is having an attitude.”
I lift my head cocking a brow at her. “Could you bring some roses.”
She”s trying so hard not to laugh but gives in. “On it, Prez.”
Eventually I manage to focus on my work and after a meeting with some new suppliers, I turn to check my security monitors. Seeing everything is going smoothly relaxes me, until my gaze falls on the last frame. I get out of my office and head downstairs at lightning speed. I stop on the last few steps while I hear her murmuring something.
“Why the hell did he come here?” She nervously paces back and forth.
“Did you get lost, Princess?” I ask, making her startle.
She comes to a halt before peering at the end of the hallway. “I was looking for the back door.”
Leaning against the wall, I”m waiting for her to look at me. “You wanna leave before celebrating your birthday, Princess?”
“Stop calling me, Princess.” She snaps in exasperation.
I tense. Something happened. It takes a glance to see something is off. “Why are you quitting your own party? Someone was mean to you?”
“No,” she peers at the floor, and I lift her chin to meet my eyes. They glaze up but still I can see she’s fighting it. “it”s just…” she stops when the door opens.
“There you… oh, well, never mind, do whatever you”re doing.” Her friend says shutting it right away with a mischievous smile on her face.
“Come with me.” I start heading back upstairs. When she’s not following me, I stop and cock a brow at her. She”s pondering if to come up or not but then she joins me.
When we get into the office, she pauses to look around. I drag her toward the mirror window that overviews the club. “Who”s the reason you”re running away?”
“Who said it”s for someone?” She asks but her gaze goes to the VIP where her friends are. A few couples, two guys and three girls.
“I don”t like to see my customers leaving sad, plus it”s your birthday. Whatever bothers you, I”ll get rid of it.”
A smile escapes her. A genuine smile that makes my heart skip a beat. “Thank you, but I can”t ask you that much. Better go back to the party.”
“Wait, Princess.”
She spins around with a growl, hands fan on her hips. “What now, am I in trouble?”
“Yeah, I”ll spank your ass later for that bratty attitude.” I joke. Her cheeks turn a lovely shade of pink. “Just kidding, Princess.” She storms out of the office shaking her head and I find myself smiling.
I follow her steps while she walks past the bar. She lifts her eyes and I’m pretty sure I saw a smile. The Princess joins her friends and I”ve spotted the one who has made her feel so uncomfortable. I don”t know why but seeing her upset got me nervous and when I am, I’m a wrecking ball. Clenching my fists, I move away and head downstairs.
The music envelops me as I pat one of my brothers’ shoulders. “J, how”s it going?”
He nods while shaking a drink. “Great, Rock, everyone is enjoying their night.”
“Then you”re doing your job well. Do you have the bottle for the birthday party?”
“Yep,” he points at the maxi bottle while his eyes get bigger and chuckles looking behind me. I turn around and see a huge bunch of roses. Fuck!
“Here you go, Rock,” says Di, handing them to me. I stare at them and then at her shitty face. “What? You said bring me some roses, I didn”t know how many.”
“At least they”re not all red.” I grumble while taking them.
“She will love them.” Her smile gets bigger.
I shake my head. Sometimes I wish she could stop reading my mind.