Chapter 13
MADDIE
The hurt cut deep when I woke up naked and alone in my bed. I wasn’t stupid; I knew he’d still keep me at arm’s length after our night together. But I hadn’t expected him to run out on me without a goodbye.
I told him it was ‘just sex.’ So why should he have treated me differently from any other one-night stand? I had no right to be upset. And yet, I couldn’t help the way my heart felt gutted at his absence.
Last night, he made me feel like we could have something more than a strained friendship riddled with sexual tension. In my wildest dreams, I knew it wasn’t possible. No matter how much I liked him or how Dinah buttered up my brother. Noah would never accept me dating one of his teammates.
I climbed out of my bed at the sound of my alarm ringing, and I moaned in pain from the soreness between my thighs. Practice was going to kick my ass today. But it had been so worth it. Playing club was a breeze compared to the level of competition at my old university, but it didn’t mean I didn’t hustle on the ice. Not sure I could slack off today with the Ice Queen nipping at my heels. Elsa was far too serious about her hockey. I might have appreciated that intensity last year or if I was trying to make the national team, but not when I was playing club hockey to an audience of hockey moms.
I dressed and ate breakfast in my room while I checked my email and made notes in my planner for my to-do list. I had stuff I needed to do for Dinah, and she kept nagging me to come to the game tonight, but I couldn’t do that after I slept with Matt. I needed some distance. Or else my heart might get more ideas than it already had.
I went to class, but my mind kept wandering, running over the way Matt held me tight last night and how his kisses made me feel that spark of electricity. All I could think about was how much I wanted to do it again, but that was an impossibility.
I went through the rest of my day in a daze, and I didn’t even flinch when Elsa snapped at me for being late to practice.
“Dude, chill!” Kiira came to my rescue. “She’s five minutes early.”
“If you’re five minutes early, you’re on time,” Elsa snipped and then took off in the direction of the ice, her blonde braid whipping around behind her.
“What’s her problem?” my linemate, Karen, asked me.
“No clue,” I said as I got dressed.
“She needs to get laid,” Kiira joked.
“Maybe,” I conceded.
The conversation forced my thoughts back to last night again. I was supposed to feel better now that I finally got laid, but I felt so blah. Not that it wasn’t good—it was—I just wasn’t sure how to process the confusing thoughts in my brain. God, maybe I should have fucked one of those douchey hockey bros instead of the sweet gentlemanly one I was crushing on.
I tied my skates, and when I got up, my inner thighs screamed. “Fuck me.”
“What’s with you?” Karen asked.
“Nothing. Sore from last practice?” I lied but said it like a question because I couldn’t believe my own lie.
She raised an eyebrow at me. “Is that so?”
“Uh-huh.”
A smirk worked its way up her mouth. “No way. You got it in last night, didn’t you?”
I felt heat rise to my face. “Uhhh…”
Karen gave me a smile. “Holy shit, good for you.”
“Hell yeah. No more pesky virginity for this one,” Kiira cheered and danced in her goalie gear.
“Kiira!” I hissed.
I had told her that in confidence. She gave me shit for virginity being a social construct, and when I told her I wasn’t completely innocent, she said oral sex was still sex, so I wasn’t a virgin.
Kiira pulled her goalie mask down before making her dramatic exit out of the locker room.
I sighed when I found my teammates still sitting around grinning at me.
“Was it good?” one teased.
“Yes, nosy.”
Karen bumped me with her arm. “So you’re sore from riding that dick, huh?” She stood up and humped the air.
Well, yes, exactly. It was fromriding Matt’s dick. Which I thoroughly enjoyed.
I rolled my eyes. “Ridiculous, all of you.”
“Good for you, Mads. But maybe find someone for Ice Queen out there to give us all some peace.”
I shook my head. “I’ll try!”
I headed out onto the ice and stretched out on it. My muscles were so tight that I should have stretched this morning to work out the kinks.
I skated over to a pile of pucks and did stick work as I got warmed up. The rest of the girls piled in, and Coach began practice, having us run through drills and hammering into us what to watch out for in our upcoming game.
I wanted to die by the time it was over. My legs were on fire, and all I wanted to do was take a nice bath, but we only had a stand-up shower in my dorm. That was one thing I missed about home. I could always go to my brother’s and use the one in his house, but I’d rather not.
I showered in the locker room after practice and was surprised to find Kiira and Karen hanging around waiting for me.
“Hey, let’s get dinner,” Kiira said.
“Okay…”
This was the first time they invited me to anything. I wondered if they were hazing me and trying to get me to crack. I didn’t feel that close with my new teammates, but we’d only been playing together for a couple of months. Kiira was my favorite of the bunch. Even if she was a bit of a wild card. But she was a goalie, so that was to be expected.
“Come on, Kennedy! Be our friend,” Kiira joked.
I paused and stared at them. “Wait…did you think I didn’t want to hang out with you? I thought none of you liked me.”
Karen shook her head. “No way! We thought you were shy. It seems like you’re too busy.”
Okay, fair. I was busy with taking an extra class, working for Dinah, and ‘operation lose it.’ That last one was over with now and would free up my time for my other responsibilities. I didn’t want my teammates to think I didn’t like them. Maybe I hadn’t been putting in enough of an effort either.
“Let’s go!” Kiira said.
“You like Local Hangout?” Karen asked.
I wanted to laugh. Of course I did. Everyone at Franklin did. It was nice we could all drink too. It was so weird to see the age restrictions in this country. If I didn’t take a gap year after high school, I’d be stuck underage drinking like the rest of the kids in my year.
“Yeah, but I was literally there last night,” I told them.
Karen shrugged. “Me too! Who cares?”
We must have just missed each other because I was sure I would have noticed her. Although, I was preoccupied by flirting with Matt.
I grabbed my bag and threw my coat on. It was close to the end of October, so it was getting chilly, and Halloween was almost upon us.
“I love fall,” Karen said as we walked outside.
“You’re just a pumpkin spice latte basic bitch,” Kiira teased.
“Yeah, no shame in that,” Karen joked back. “But I love Halloween, and then it’s Thanksgiving, which is my favorite.”
I wrinkled my nose. “I’m not sure how I can get used to Thanksgiving in November. That’s weird.”
“What do you mean?” Karen asked.
“We have it in October in Canada.”
“No, that’s weird. You have to have Halloween first!” Kiira exclaimed.
I shook my head at her while the two of them razzed me about being a weird Canadian.
It was a hike to the bar from the skating rink. Since Franklin was Ivy and smack in the middle of Philadelphia, there was actually a rink. That had surprised me in a good way. I was worried about having to find transportation to the rink. It wasn’t an easy walk, but it was manageable.
On the way over, we chatted about our upcoming game and commiserated over Elsa being way too serious about hockey when it was just club. I was glad they felt the same way. It was nice that they wanted to include me and hang out. So far, finding friends at school had been hard. I had friends back in Winnipeg, but I was so far away, it felt like I was all alone here. That was one reason I was grateful for Matt. There might be some awkwardness the next time we saw each other, but I valued our friendship before anything else. My heart would get over it.
When we got to the bar, it was wall-to-wall drunk college kids. I’d never understand why Thursday night was the biggest drinking night here. We grabbed drinks at the bar, squeezing in between frat bros while we waited for a booth to open up. Karen shamelessly flirted with the bearded bartender, who grinned like he was going to get lucky later. With the way Karen eyed him up, he might.
On the TV above the bar, warmups for the game had started, and the between-the-glass reporter was interviewing Aaron Riley. I spied Matt in the background, and unease spread through my chest.
“Riley’s so hot,” Karen sighed dreamily.
I laughed. “He’s happily married.”
“How do you know?” Karen asked.
Oh, boy. I knew because I got drunk with his firecracker wife at my brother’s wedding. But I hadn’t been forthcoming about my relation to one of the biggest hockey stars in the city. Back home in Winnipeg, people treated my brother like a God, and it was nice being at Franklin without that hanging over my head.
Kiira snorted. “I read his wife’s romance book. Dude’s definitely not going anywhere.”
I swiveled my head at her. “You read Fi’s book?”
“Yeah! It was pretty good.”
Karen narrowed her eyes at me. “Wait, do you know his wife? You’re always posting about books on your Insta.”
I blew out a breath. Yeah, I knew her, but I wasn’t sure if I should tell them the truth.
“What’s wrong with you?” Kiira asked.
I sighed. “Do you know who my brother is?”
Karen’s eyes got wide. “No way!”
Kiira raised an eyebrow, but before she could ask, the host came over to us and told us our table was ready. She walked us over to our booth, and I was hoping they’d forget about the conversation, but they stared at me with comical looks of excitement on their faces.
“What?” I asked and buried my face in the menu.
Kiira slapped it away. “No one comes here and reads the menu. Spill.”
“Fine. My brother plays for the Bulldogs.”
“No shit!” she exclaimed, then she frowned. “Wait…who?”
“Noah Kennedy. Duh,” Karen explained.
Kiira’s mouth formed an ‘o’.
“He’s hot,” Karen said with a grin.
I blanched. “Gross, no. But also happily married. I love my sister-in-law. I actually work for her now.”
“Oh yeah. What’s that like?” Karen asked.
Before I could answer, our server came over and dropped coasters on the table. She cocked her head when she saw me. “Weren’t you just here?”
I gave her a small smile. “Yeah. Last night.”
“Let me guess, girl’s night where you tell them all the juicy details about your hot date last night? He was cute. Hope you nabbed a good one. Now, what can I start you ladies off with?”
I felt my face burning red, especially with the way Kiira was snickering into her hands. I muttered something to our server and tried to sink into my seat, but Kiira and Karen wouldn’t let it go.
“Hot dude, huh?” Karen teased.
“Give us the deets!” Kiira urged.
I frowned at her. “Why do you want to know?”
“Because we know nothing about you, and this is juicy.”
I frowned. “That’s not on purpose. I didn’t think any of you liked me.”
Karen shot Kiira a sideways glance. “Honestly? We thought you were kinda stuck up.”
“Me?” I squeaked out. That was the last thing I wanted someone to think.
Karen shrugged. “Sorry. We didn’t know you, but Kiira likes everyone, so she’s not a good judge.”
Kiira scowled. “I don’t like everyone.”
“Yes, you do,” Karen and I said in unison and then laughed.
They were still bugging me by the time we got our beers.
“It’s complicated,” I explained.
“How?” Karen asked.
“He lives and works with my brother. He didn’t want to break the code.”
“He works…” Kiira trailed off, and her eyes lit up. “Oh, he plays for the team, too.”
I dipped my head down in silent confirmation.
Karen was immediately on her phone. “Who?”
“Cally.”
“Oh. Lucky you, he’s a dreamboat.”
I gave her a funny look. “I guess? He’s really sweet. And a gentleman. But I’m pissed at him.”
“Why?” Kiira asked.
“When I woke up this morning, he was gone. I told him it was just sex and it wouldn’t change our friendship, but I didn’t expect that.”
She peered at me and then shared a look with Karen. “Do you…want it to change?”
“I don’t know. I really like him, but…my brother would get his meathead brothers-in-law to help put his body in the Schuylkill River.”
They bursted out laughing.
“That’s a bit…much,” Karen said.
“So?” Kiira asked.
“So?” I repeated.
“Yeah. Do you like this guy?”
I nodded. So much, and I felt silly over my schoolgirl crush.
“Then get it in!” Karen cheered, and she and Kiira high-fived. “Who gives a shit what your brother thinks?”
“Hey, you could always have fun sneaking around,” Kiira suggested.
I shook my head at them. I was glad for their support, but it wasn’t that simple.